I think we can take his cousin's statement as real that he was "stressed but happy" jmo He looks happy and relaxed in the pic from the bar. Many many people lose people close to them and continue to function and are not suicidal. Many people have addictions and issues and do not take their own lives. Back in my drinking days is when I lost my dad and I remember being stressed and very upset, but also remember happy moments with family and friends during the same time period. I believe his "let's leave" text clearly indicates he was ready to go home with his cousins, not split off by himself. It just sounds like a tragic accident where they had phones that weren't working, got separated, and then he got lost with a horrible outcome. I still would be interested in timeline on the video that we haven't seen because it seems incredible that this all happened so quickly in that active area at that particular time of night right when bars were closing. I worked a few blocks from there for years. The bars were active until closing even on brutally cold nights. I'm sure the place I worked at would have denied someone entrance after a certain time, but am equally sure that a) they would have given them their coat if they asked and b) if they came back after closing in trouble someone would have helped them by making a call, or calling police, or whatever was needed. It still seems to me like something out of the ordinary happened to get him to that area...
Found Deceased MA - Zachary Marr, 22, Boston, 13 Feb 2016 #1
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THIS ^^^
This is what I've been trying to say for several pages. You said it better.
He was probably a polite young man or intimidated by someone at the door and could not even ask for his coat ....which makes me cry.
This is just so sad AND PREVENTABLE.
Loss of his life is the worst; but being refused re entry is the second part in an indirect way, the most horrific part in that that would have prevented his demise. (imo) Someone did not let him back in OR... told him not to re enter . (imo)
It is so sad. No words.... I hope they retrieve his messages to his cousin and I hope this is pursued, if not by the family .. by someone. IT WAS NINE BELOW ZERO
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Thank you Cape7! That's exactly right. You can have pain and trauma, and loss...feel stressed and still find plenty of good in life... even as you process the not so great, you can be genuinely happy as your working things out. A night out with your friends, an I love you text between you and dad.
struggles are not a sign of "dysfunction". There a sign of...LIFE.
struggles are not a sign of "dysfunction". There a sign of...LIFE.
Someone (imo) told him that he was not allowed back in. This is bolstered by his own message "stuck outside." This person who refused entry needs to be found or the rules need to be changed and clear to everyone who works there (and other places).
Think about it. It is super cold as in within minutes you'd FEEL IT. Your coat is inside and you don't even ask for it? WHY? BC someone told you that you cannot re enter.
Think about it. It is super cold as in within minutes you'd FEEL IT. Your coat is inside and you don't even ask for it? WHY? BC someone told you that you cannot re enter.
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What a really great, clear way to explain it, thanks! If someone were to get a look at my hard drive they would think I was a "Hoarder" lol!
I can clearly see the benefit, now that you put it that way!
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Personally, I would have called 911, told them I needed police because I was freezing and the bar was depriving me of my coat that I checked. I would try to make sure to do it within earshot of the bouncers/doormen.
I can be a totally PITA when I am being wronged though. If he really was denied his coat, I wish he would have taken that course of action. The bouncers would either get your coat immediately or wait for the police to arrive. Either way, you have some record via the 911 recording of what's going on.
If my phone had a dead battery, I would wait outside the door and ask every person that came out to dial 911 for me after explaining they are keeping my coat from me. The bouncers will be pissed you're telling everyone and either call the cops to complain about you harassing customers or give you your coat.
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I agree!
"He sent me a Snapchat saying they're not letting me back in let's leave"
"I texted him and said where are you, and he said out front and that was at 1:41 a.m."
It doesn't get any clearer than that. He was not allowed to go back inside. What happened after that is pure speculation.
I totally agree and see all your points. But at 22 I would have been intimidated. I am old.. older.. now and would not respond that way now, but at 22 yeah I can see it. Polite and all that...
Also, he had had at least 4 drinks (one at cousin's home and three at bar)n and he was in the cold for several minutes at that point. Im not sure how clearly he was thinking. Cold effects a person fairly quickly and the mind and body go wonky fast.. in the extreme cold.
YES! And the tragic part starts at ..... his not being allowed back in. What happened after is a direct result of... not being allowed back in (imo)
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Because with water this cold, they are already endangering their lives staying in for as long as an hour yesterday. After hurricane-force storms, waves, rain, etc. there's no visibility. The waves can pick them up and slam them and their equipment into the locks, bridge piers, breakwaters, etc. These guys are already going above and beyond.
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Right. This the question I really want an answer for. I would be beyond enraged, had my child had been denied warmth, on such a night! I don't care what condition he was in, even if he was belligerent, call the police, if he was that bad. It would be manslaughter to keep someone out, in such temperatures!
At the Quincy stop they kept the subway station open all night that week. Specifically because homeless people were taking shelter there. ( No service, they just didn't kick them out and lock up).
I can see why he might not have called 911. In my youth. I had bronchial pneumonia, and I just lay In my bed, thinking I would tough it out. I was delirious... Had I seen anyone else, in that condition, I most certainly would have call 911! A friend of mine came over , and he was appalled. I can still hear him saying, " what are you going to to do lay there and die?
He brought me to the ER. Thank God.
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2:00 AM.
There can only be one entrance and there must be 2 exits including the main doors. Side doors are generally exit only, unless there is a separate check-in person at the door. The main door is locked for entry at about 1:30 in my experience.
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I want to say something... and I don't know how... (Anyone who knows me will tell you how rare that is lol! )...
I'm really grateful you guys are all here.( and yes I mean you too, Edgar!). I can't really discuss these things with many people in my real life... they don't want to hear it. They find it depressing, macabre even. It's like some of us can tolerate these painful stories, and bear witness, and some of us can't. I just happened to be one of those people who can handle it, and therefore I feel somewhat compelled to do so, I am so glad there you guys are here with me!
I'm really grateful you guys are all here.( and yes I mean you too, Edgar!). I can't really discuss these things with many people in my real life... they don't want to hear it. They find it depressing, macabre even. It's like some of us can tolerate these painful stories, and bear witness, and some of us can't. I just happened to be one of those people who can handle it, and therefore I feel somewhat compelled to do so, I am so glad there you guys are here with me!
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Massachusetts: 2 a.m., although cities and towns can (and frequently do) set last call earlier. Alcohol sales stop 30 minutes prior to closing time.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Last_call_(bar_term)#United_States
(my town closes at one)
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Hello - I am unclear on this and I am sure someone here knows the answer. If they bounce you, for whatever reason, how do you pay your tab? All people I have seen bounced get escorted to the door and outside by the bouncer. Do they just forget the bill. It seems if they take them first to the bar to pay, he would have a chance to "escape" the bouncer and get his coat, no? Or you could text your friends, while still inside, because the bartender is probably busy, and tell them "help" I'm about to get bounced and don't have my coat. What if you checked your coat and left your wallet in your coat pocket, or told them you did, they would have to get it for you, right. I am not sure of the procedure, does anyone know? Thanks to all. Katt
I totally understand this.
Also, I pray for a good outcome always. However, in horrific tragedies I think there is usually something to learn if for no other reason than to help others in hopes that whatever happened... that it doesn't happen to someone else. And if there is a clear person responsible - to hold them accountable. Tragic things that could have been easily prevented (imo) are the most heartbreaking for me.
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