GUILTY NJ - Gregory Leary & others for sexual assault of 7yo girl, Trenton, 2010

[Missizzy]

Still not what I'm looking for but an excellent overview on sibling/young relative abuse and empathy. Read carefully, I see many implications in this current case we're dealing with:

http://www.psychpage.com/family/library/sib_abuse2.htm

"De Jong (1988) and Daie et al (1989) present several factors in families that can lead to sibling or cousin abuse. Abuse can arise in an environment that:

....fails to protect the child, though poor supervision/monitoring and poor choices regarding babysitters and surrogate caretakers; examples include allowing children to remain in the care of known siblings abusers, or a general lack of supervision of the children and knowledge about their activities in and out of the home

....is based on a multi-familial home were older children have caretaking responsibility for younger children; combined with poor boundaries, this situation can allow older children to pressure younger children into meeting their sexual interests and needs..."

more at link

 

[Linda7NJ]

Thanks...so in a strict, official definition, they wouldn't be, but what DO you call a 13-14 year old that does sexual stuff to a tiny child like that? Not being sarcastic or anything, just trying to wrap my head around it. :waitasec:

an eventual pedophile? a budding pedophile?

Whatever...we all know what they are...doesn't matter what to me what ya call em.

 

[slowbutsteady]

snipped from...http://www.wlbt.com/Global/story.asp?S=12258955

"...The 15-year-old has been charged with promoting prostitution, aggravated sexual assault and other crimes. Police have not released her name."...:clap:


"...One of the two adults charged was Gregory Joseph Leary, 20, of Trenton, who was charged with having sex with the 15-year-old. He now has additional charges of aggravated sexual assault and endangering the welfare of a child against him.

The second adult arrested is Tiemear Lewis, 19, also of Trenton, who was also charged with aggravated sexual assault and endangering the welfare of a child.

The juveniles arrested on the same charges were boys ages 13, 14 and 17. They were remanded to the Mercer County Youth Detention Center and are waiting for an arraignment to be scheduled. The juvenile suspects may be tried as adults."

"..., the 7-year-old girl and her two younger siblings. The woman is the mother of the 7-year-old girl, and the man she lives with is the father of the 15-year-old. The man and woman also have two toddlers together".

I pray the Lord looks over these babies...hopefully the parents will watch over their children a little better.


This story just absolutely breaks my heart!!

 

[songline]

AA--I don't think a 15 year old child can consent to sex (with or without the exchange of funds), so whomever sexually penetrated this girl would be guilty of some level of sexual abuse or rape. JMO Please correct me if the laws in NJ are different.

When I was a teen there was a girl my age across the street, sweet, pretty and putting out for the boys. not because she was a bad kid, but she just loved the attention. Her father worked a full time job, her mom was home some of the time and she cleaned homes some of the time. Both parents were home all weekend. not much different then many families in the USA. the girl was 13...
NOT all girls who have sex at 13 have a bad family, been raped or abused. NOP....
I am sorry but I will never buy that. EARLY on I said if anything more will surface about the teen age sister who SOLD the 7 year old then we will know more but it will not surface because she is under age. SO...Continuing on the venue that the abuser is a victim is not good in my opinion.

 

[songline]

Unfortunately, it sounds as if the 7 year old victim had a hell of a lot more sense that the sister, poor baby. I hope and pray that serious long term psychological health care is made available to this poor child for as long as is needed.

DITTO!!!! NICE POST

I also hope the teen can not come back to that house and endanger the other kids too.

I wonder where her real mother is; is her mother a street person? is she imitating her?

 

[CHICANA]

When I was a teen there was a girl my age across the street, sweet, pretty and putting out for the boys. not because she was a bad kid, but she just loved the attention. Her father worked a full time job, her mom was home some of the time and she cleaned homes some of the time. Both parents were home all weekend. not much different then many families in the USA. the girl was 13...
NOT all girls who have sex at 13 have a bad family, been raped or abused. NOP....
I am sorry but I will never buy that. EARLY on I said if anything more will surface about the teen age sister who SOLD the 7 year old then we will know more but it will not surface because she is under age. SO...Continuing on the venue that the abuser is a victim is not good in my opinion.

Imagine my surprise when I learned my 14 year old was sneaking out and sneaking boys in the house as soon as I fell asleep. I was clueless. I found out way after the fact, but once she took her 5 year old brother with her because he woke up and she told him he could go if he didn't tell on her.
It still scares me to think about it, since I practically do a criminal background check before allowing my kids to visit some one's home.

I wasn't lax, I just never suspected.
She was a cheerleader, on the honor roll, and student council, and she was always so happy while she lied to my face.

She'd always call me at work to ask what time I'd be home, because she wanted to make sure her chores were done... What a doll, huh ?
I thought I was blessed, when in fact, she wanted to know what time to get the boys out.
I work days, so she wasn't home alone at night and we really don't have a social life apart from our kids.
IDK, if I didn't suspect because I was nothing like her when I was her age or if I'm just gullible. Once I found out, she was grounded for the entire summer and only allowed out for church.
What she did, didn't compare to this 15 year old ( I hope anyway) but she wasn't raised to act the way she did, nor was that the example set in our home.
At 15, I think peer influence trumps parental influence.

 

[songline]

Imagine my surprise when I learned my 14 year old was sneaking out and sneaking boys in the house as soon as I fell asleep. I was clueless. I found out way after the fact, but once she took her 5 year old brother with her because he woke up and she told him he could go if he didn't tell on her.
It still scares me to think about it, since I practically do a criminal background check before allowing my kids to visit some one's home.

I wasn't lax, I just never suspected.
She was a cheerleader, on the honor roll, and student council, and she was always so happy while she lied to my face.

She'd always call me at work to ask what time I'd be home, because she wanted to make sure her chores were done... What a doll, huh ?
I thought I was blessed, when in fact, she wanted to know what time to get the boys out.
I work days, so she wasn't home alone at night and we really don't have a social life apart from our kids.
IDK, if I didn't suspect because I was nothing like her when I was her age or if I'm just gullible. Once I found out, she was grounded for the entire summer and only allowed out for church.
What she did, didn't compare to this 15 year old ( I hope anyway) but she wasn't raised to act the way she did, nor was that the example set in our home.
At 15, I think peer influence trumps parental influence.

That is exactly what I mean when I keep on telling missizzy that this 15 year old may not be a victim
of any kind at all. I have no idea why she is so into thinking that must be the reason.
I do not see any such evidence with that 15 year old at all. this girl needs help YES but she is no victim,
and need to be punished too.

 

[AutomaticAuttie]

That is exactly what I mean when I keep on telling missizzy that this 15 year old may not be a victim
of any kind at all. I have no idea why she is so into thinking that must be the reason.
I do not see any such evidence with that 15 year old at all. this girl needs help YES but she is no victim,
and need to be punished too.

Songline,
I couldn't agree more with your post!

 

[tlcya]

That is exactly what I mean when I keep on telling missizzy that this 15 year old may not be a victim
of any kind at all. I have no idea why she is so into thinking that must be the reason.I do not see any such evidence with that 15 year old at all. this girl needs help YES but she is no victim,
and need to be punished too.

her reason for feeling strongly that the 15 year old's abherant behavior may stem from past abuse is firmly based in her own life's experience. I too feel strongly that there is some sort of sexual abuse, molestation etc in this girl's background. Something that is firmly based in my own life's experience.

I realize you don't hold the same view and respect your opinion. Interestingly, it is those who I disagree with that give me the most food for thought sometimes.

Regardless, even if the 15 year old suffered sexual abuse or molestation at some point in her past, it by no means buys her any sympathy here.

 

[tlcya]

Having been abused, having been promiscuous, having revelled in the male attention of my peers, having been "one of those" girls, I can say that being that sort of teenager and being a person who would sell their own 7 year old sister's sexual favor are a FAR CRY APART from one another.

 

[Missizzy]

Songline--ITA that we have no earthly idea what level of culpability this 15 year old carries. I've tried to make two points. First, the child is 15 and I hold an absolutely unwavering conviction that children (a person under the age of 18) should never be held to the same level of responsibility for their actions as an adult. We'll have to agree to disagree on that, I'm afraid. To my mind, a child is a child is a child--no matter their crime.

Secondly, I want to know all the factors which led up to this action and whether or not this child is really one like Chicana's daughter (a great kid making poor choices) or a troubled and damaged girl who is the product of an unhealthy environment and/or mind. And what level of forethought and malice did she bring with her when she led the younger girl into this situation?

Chicana--Don't ever feel like the Lone Ranger. I have two sons (fine upstanding citizens, 33 and 35) for whom we had to call LE when they were 15 and 17. Seems they had found a stash of stolen goods at a wrecking yard. They were sneaking out every night to steal the stolen goods. They even had night vision goggles and the whole nine yards of MacGyver gear.

We happened to go in their bedroom one day and found a brand new police radio (still in the box) and a money bag with $60 of coins marked with the local school's logo. First, we stood there and about died. Where were our lovely, "good" boys?

We tossed the room (first time we ever did that as we were very inexperienced) and found thousands of dollars of "re-stolen" stuff. When they came riding home that day (they were serious cyclists), they were quite surprised to find several police officers waiting for them. They were arrested and never knew who turned them in (until they were adults--they said they suspected).

After they went through the legal process, we did something that many thought was crazy. With the permission of the their PO's and their school, we let them ride their bikes from the SF Bay Area to Austin, TX. Took them 29 days to ride 2100 miles. Their destination was to see their grandparents to discuss their recent choices. They left boys and came back men as it was an arduous trip (with absolutely no adult involvement). Never had a problem with criminal behavior with those two since. It is an absolute miracle that they didn't get shot by the drug dealers who were the original thieves. So, I'm well aware of the wonderful kid who's up to no good.

I certainly don't think that's the case with this girl. You and I, Chicana, were clueless and gullible. But our kids were raised in healthy environments. I think this teen has been making terrible choices and has fallen into the trap of others' control for quite some time.

Just remember, though, that she doesn't have the legal right to consent to any of these behaviors. Just because she's involved does not mean she has "free will". We'll have to see. Our society has chosen 18 as the marker for adulthood. She's not an adult.

I am very hopeful that her punishment will most definitely fit the crime and that the judge will take into account any mitigating factors, if there are any.

 

[Missizzy]

tlcox--Thank you for understanding what I'm trying to say. And no, I don't offer her sympathy, per se, if we learn that there are serious mitigating factors in this teen's life. But I do have empathy for her and want her to get treatment. No doubt she will be out on the streets in a few years with a functioning reproductive system. That scares me to death. I don't want her own children to suffer from her thinking errors.

I also wanted to share that you are correct that I am speaking from direct experience--from the parent's standpoint. Here's a small story I've never shared.

Six months after our children's rapist was sent to lock-up, we found some blood in our 2 youngest daughters' bedroom carpet. These are the two who were raped. After much questioning, the truth came out. The older one (by three months and 13 IQ points) had vaginally penetrated the younger one with a pencil. The reason? She wanted her younger sister to "pay" for not stealing something for her at school. One was in 4th grade and one in 3rd. They were both around 8 yrs. old. We were horrified, appalled and literally sickened.

I don't think I've ever felt such disgust for what one child did to another. I remember having to go for a long walk as I was just livid. We took the younger one to the doctor and we called the police. The detective advised that there was nothing he could do as we could expect this type of sexualized, mean-spirited, acting out behavior due to the rapes.

We called DHS and the Children's Advocacy Center. They also agreed not much could be done other than a higher level of supervision (we moved to "eyes on" for the older girl) and a change of bedrooms.

My point is that the abuse had so skewed our older daughter's view of what was right and wrong that she sexually harmed her younger sister without showing much empathy. The older girl is the one that came away from the rapes with a highly provocative style of behavior and who started prostituting secretly at 17, and now openly at age 22.

Pain and trauma have a tendency to not stop with the original victim if there are factors such as mental illness, lack of support or supervision, development delay, or pre-existing lack of conscience. Many of these factors had a role in our daughter's action. And even though we begged for therapy or a specialized group home stay, nothing like that existed for a child with DD. We were trained, instead, to increase the level of electronic surveillance and physical supervision in our home.

 

[tlcya]

I totally get where you are coming from Izzy. I had a situation develop with my then 7 year old granddaughter and my then 4 year old son. Her inappropriate and overly sexualized behavior already had my radar up but when she was involved in sexual acting out with my son it was the impetus to place a call to the abuse hotline.

What a horrible off center feeling to hear your 7 year old granddaughter referred to as an abuser, a perpetrator by the very people I called for help. But they were right, she was a perpetrator and she was abusive.

She never has divulged who what when where, but I remain convinced that her overt sexual behavior stems from abuse. At the time they had just moved in with my little family and this circunstance created the need for "eyes on" supervision at all times.

I know that these experiences have colored how I view the world and it occupants and I do not apologize for my own unique perspective.

 

[Missizzy]

Nor do I, tlcox.

However, I do have to say that it is eye-opening and thought provoking to hear each poster's personal response to the crimes we discuss on this forum. I am forever thankful for everyone's civilized discourse on such heart-wrenching topics.

 

[Belinda]

tlcox - My heart truly goes out to you. What an awful situation to deal with. Sexual abuse of your child is such a horrible thing to deal with (been there, done that), but to have the abuse come from your own little granddaugter is beyond anything I can even imagine. I'm so very sorry for all you and your family have suffered and I hope you will all have the opportunity for healing.

 

[songline]

her reason for feeling strongly that the 15 year old's abherant behavior may stem from past abuse is firmly based in her own life's experience. I too feel strongly that there is some sort of sexual abuse, molestation etc in this girl's background. Something that is firmly based in my own life's experience.

I realize you don't hold the same view and respect your opinion. Interestingly, it is those who I disagree with that give me the most food for thought sometimes.

Regardless, even if the 15 year old suffered sexual abuse or molestation at some point in her past, it by no means buys her any sympathy here.

I used to counsel people, some were incest victims, some sold themselves. I can tell you for sure that not all girls who sold themselves were abused. I can tell you for sure that some came from a one parent home and maybe a bit dysfunctional because mom was struggling to make ends meet. but not all of them were harmed by a man. I can also tell you that one of them had a father who liked prostitutes and she discovered this when she was 16 guess what she did by the age of 17????
SO I Know the variations. I really do. I also know wat missizzy is strugling with in her own oife.

I do not see that this girl had any reason to sell her sister other then being a careless,
self serving rebel. That is what seems to show up.
And I am a firm believer that, that type needs both therapy and punishment.

 

[songline]

THIS IS TO ALL OF YOU

:beats: :blowkiss: :beats: :blowkiss: :beats: :blowkiss: :beats: :blowkiss:

For being sensitive, loving and caring.
we see some very hard cases here at WS some had me in tears for days, some had me furious for days.
This case is a nightmare. Most are tough to contend with except for the humor threads.
YOU GUYS ARE REALLY AWSOME and I say this from the bottom of my heart.
:blowkiss: :beats:

 

[Charlie09]

<snipped>

Just remember, though, that she doesn't have the legal right to consent to any of these behaviors. Just because she's involved does not mean she has "free will". We'll have to see. Our society has chosen 18 as the marker for adulthood. She's not an adult.

I am very hopeful that her punishment will most definitely fit the crime and that the judge will take into account any mitigating factors, if there are any.

There's not something that magically happens the day a child turns 18. I cannot give this 15 year old the benefit of the doubt that because she's not 18 she didn't know exactly what she was doing, or that if it got out of hand that she couldn't have managed to sneak in a 911 call.

 

[kbl8201]

ok i just got back. im not sure where to start on this one.

i guess i'll start with the jaycee and elizabeth comparison.

jaycee and elizabeth were kidnapped, raped, brainwashed, held against there will. there is also a large amount of evidence in both cases that the girls thought they were PROTECTING Family by not trying to escape. neither of them tried to sell a family member for sex.......

many sexual abuse and rape victims DO become promiscous, or even become prostitutes. i have sympathy for them.

i do NOT Have sympathy for someone who uses there abuse to turn around and sell there sister for sex while they watch. you cross a line when you turn self abuse into abuse of others. i dont care that she is only 15, she knew right from wrong. she chose wrong. i dont get the whole 'she had no free will'. did someone put a gun to her head and tell her 'you have to pimp out your pre teen sister'?"

next, we dont even know if this girl was abused sexually. and having a bad home situation wouldnt excuse it either. to me, she is a sex offender. that little girl went with her because she was worried about her big sister, or stepsister, and the sister turned that into something evil.

 

[AutomaticAuttie]

ok i just got back. im not sure where to start on this one.

i guess i'll start with the jaycee and elizabeth comparison.

jaycee and elizabeth were kidnapped, raped, brainwashed, held against there will. there is also a large amount of evidence in both cases that the girls thought they were PROTECTING Family by not trying to escape. neither of them tried to sell a family member for sex.......

many sexual abuse and rape victims DO become promiscous, or even become prostitutes. i have sympathy for them.

i do NOT Have sympathy for someone who uses there abuse to turn around and sell there sister for sex while they watch. you cross a line when you turn self abuse into abuse of others. i dont care that she is only 15, she knew right from wrong. she chose wrong. i dont get the whole 'she had no free will'. did someone put a gun to her head and tell her 'you have to pimp out your pre teen sister'?"

next, we dont even know if this girl was abused sexually. and having a bad home situation wouldnt excuse it either. to me, she is a sex offender. that little girl went with her because she was worried about her big sister, or stepsister, and the sister turned that into something evil.

Nor do I have any! There are plenty of people who have suffered one form of abuse and lived their lives free from doing what was done to them.