BBM Juvenile offenders of sexual assault have often experienenced a warping of their sexuality and morals regarding sexuality. This is absolutely true.
However, we are NOT discussing a juvenile here - we are speaking of an adult - an adult who has had opportunities and chances to learn and grow and change.
Again, I am not excusing anyone's behavior. Young people become adults, and if they haven't dealt with their issues, these issues will remain into adulthood. I have worked with said juveniles' parents as well.
I'm finding it really hard to bite my tongue here, but I will. For Elaina, for the sake of this thread. But not every individual who perpetrates abuse is either a sociopath or a victim. Most are insecure individuals who lack other skills to rationally work through issues and resort to physical and mental dominance to retain power.
I NEVER said every individual who perpetrates abuse is a sociopath or a victim. I said MOST which is not the same thing. Why would a person grow up to be an insecure individual? Why would someone grow up without learning skills to rationally work through issues, and think that dominance is the answer? Because that's what they learned! If you grow up in a healthy family, where you feel secure, learn skills, and don't have your power stripped from you, then you are less likely to do and become what you described.
It is not at all "healing" in adults at least to hear a person say, when finding out about abuse that they always wondered whether the perpetrator was abused. It totally undermines the healing done to date, places a rationalisation where there should be indignation, and makes the victim question themselves.
I'm curious of your experience. It helped me, and has helped many in my presence. A major part of healing is understanding and forgiving, not indignation. I am a little offended that you can generalize about me, while blaming me for generalizing.
Many of the generalisations you have posted are the precise reason why I posted initially. And I understand they extend from your professional experience with juveniles. But we're not talking about the 11 year old boy molesting his young sister because he was made to watch his parents have sex for years. Were talking about an adult who has otherwise been functioning enough to raise one child through the early years.
See Transactional analysis
By all means, postulate theories on the RS /AS dynamic. On what RS may truly be trying to cover for throughout all this. But don't make claims of absolute where there are no tangible links or data to back it up.
The closest thing I said was that the likelihood of someone who was not sexually abused becoming sexually abusive are close to zero. Close does not mean absolute all. This is based on years of education, research, experience, and every single scholarly writing and training I have seen on the subject. But there is always room for human difference, which is why I said close.
There is a high correlation in psychological research on perpetrators of abuse having experienced it themselves. It's far from 100% as you have claimed and the authors of the studies acknowledge the chances of distortion in the data due to the vested interest in making such a claim (ie leniency in legal matters). Please show me where I said 100% In the study of psychology, there is always room for human differences. Please show me so I can correct it because I tried really, really hard to be mindful to always leave room for that/ differences/ exception.
