Peaches Geldof 25 found dead

[SeekingJana]

IF people have been reading the ( mostly U.K.) online news articles about Peaches Geldof's life and tragic death, it is clear that Peaches emphasized and lauded her specific attachment parenting style.

IDK how she was raised, but most babies have not been fed on a set schedule for all of my life- they are fed when hungry, held and carried in slings and pack- type attachments, and generally a home with a baby or babies and small children is a child- centric home. I don't think she meant a " demand" schedule vs. a timed schedule for feeding or sleeping, but something more.

Peaches and her husband did apparently do some things which most or some of us don't, including the controversial co-sleeping, where a baby sleeps in the bed with a parent or parents, starting as a newborn. ( The controversy stems from the probably- rare situations in which a parent rolls over onto an infant and suffocates it during sleeping).
In Peaches' and her husband's case, they had different sleeping styles with babies with different needs, so she slept with one baby in one bed, and her husband slept with the other in another bed. This has been widely reported with entire articles quoted in Peaches' own words in the past few days in the U.K. Daily Mail online news. I also think she has given interviews in some parenting magazines about her parenting style and how it brought her peace and contentment.

 

[SapphireSteel]

Ugh I just feel sick, how tragic Phaedra was home alone with his mother. A repeat of Tigerlilly and Paula.

Attachment Parenting = Thomas wouldn't have taken a breastfeeding baby. Now we know he didn't take him, so perhaps Peaches wasn't frightened of losing them both like her mother had been when she died.

Perhaps this is just very simple - she pushed her body too far. Juice diets and breastfeeding probably don't go together too well, if she still struggled with bulimia as well the poor girl was starving to death in front of our eyes.

Yet the magazines speak breathlessly of how slender she was, how she could wear anything with her new improved figure.



I'm sad, I'm mad too. It's all our fault really, that young mums should feel so much pressure to be perfect...Peaches was being held up as an "example" to millions of others by the media, and reality is she was dying right in front of our eyes just to fit into a nice dress.

It has been pointed out that she tweeted dozens of times a day - like she needed to constantly prove her joy and love instead of just kicking back and enjoying it. She was brought up in the camera's eye, I suppose it is understandable, but some would say she was asking constantly for validation and reassurance from her public.

Poor, poor girl.

 

[EmmaliLucia]

I know it's from the DailyFail but there's an article online saying that she attributed her weight loss to cutting out junk food and in 2011 it was discovered that her heart was in pretty bad condition and her cholesterol was off the charts. I know that at 25 a heart attack is rare, but if she truly did have heart problems it could have been a heart attack.

 

[SeekingJana]

I get upset with media's emphasis on every aspect of a so-called celebrity's life and appearance.. then I stop and realize that the populace AND the celebrity themself drives the market. Celebs. hire publicist and managers to tell paparrazi where they will be for " candid" photos of them shopping, walking their dog, dining out with their celeb. family, etc.

There have always been " celebrity magazines" in our lifetimes but 50 years ago, the stories were mostly fluff pieces meant to draw attention to a celebrity or other famous person's attributes, contributions, date, appearance at a function, etc.
People were not labeled with shaming terms referring to their size, height, shape, skin, hair, eyes, feet, posture, clothing ( well, clothing was scrutinized in the early celeb. mags. but if a celeb. was having a bad day, it simply wasn't reported or photographed).

Peaches Geldof was a celeb. in some ways because she was born to 2 celeb. parents and has celeb. siblings. Then, she did seek the spotlight. She knew what the writers, especially in the U.K. publications focus on- everything she did, said, and everywhere she went was fodder for a column, a photo, or a mention.

Not being in a celebrity- driven world myself, I don't know how it feels to be there, or how it feels to leave it. I do know that from reading her quoted statements, Peaches, like most famous or semi- famous people, wanted to pick and choose what was published or otherwise reported, and how and when.
Peaches profited from celebrity status in the following ways:
-Her Twitter account had so many followers that she was given huge amounts of products free for her sons and for her own use in exchange for a tweet about the product or service.
-She was said to be a model, and a reporter. Not living in the U.K., I can't qualify or quantify these careers as true or not, but if true, then she was making her living in the spotlight and would have ceased to make money if the cameras and public went away.

Media attention is a double- edged sword and it has always seemed to me that the press finds the " soft spots" in women celebs., especially, and exploits them. The first time I realized this was with the push and pull of Princess Diana and the press.
I think Peaches shared a lot of Diana's insecurities and also her need for attention, affection and public accolades-- perhaps on her own terms, which is just not part of the package in this century.

I wish the world at large would go back to a kinder, gentler place. Where people who worked hard to be stars or otherwise recognized in their field were treated with respect and a sense of " specialness". Because they are special when they entertain or enlighten through their talents and charms, varied as they are.

 

[meanmaryjean]

IF people have been reading the ( mostly U.K.) online news articles about Peaches Geldof's life and tragic death, it is clear that Peaches emphasized and lauded her specific attachment parenting style.

IDK how she was raised, but most babies have not been fed on a set schedule for all of my life- they are fed when hungry, held and carried in slings and pack- type attachments, and generally a home with a baby or babies and small children is a child- centric home. I don't think she meant a " demand" schedule vs. a timed schedule for feeding or sleeping, but something more.

Peaches and her husband did apparently do some things which most or some of us don't, including the controversial co-sleeping, where a baby sleeps in the bed with a parent or parents, starting as a newborn. ( The controversy stems from the probably- rare situations in which a parent rolls over onto an infant and suffocates it during sleeping).
In Peaches' and her husband's case, they had different sleeping styles with babies with different needs, so she slept with one baby in one bed, and her husband slept with the other in another bed. This has been widely reported with entire articles quoted in Peaches' own words in the past few days in the U.K. Daily Mail online news. I also think she has given interviews in some parenting magazines about her parenting style and how it brought her peace and contentment.

BBM: Rare? I've personally seen three cases this calendar year in my work. And while it may occur rarely, it is a 100% PREVENTABLE cause of death.

 

[Chewy]

Sadly I think they are going to find drugs in her system. There's so many of these young starlet types playing with fire. It's such a shame.

 

[SeekingJana]

BBM: Rare? I've personally seen three cases this calendar year in my work. And while it may occur rarely, it is a 100% PREVENTABLE cause of death.

I'm an R.N. also, and have worked with Peds. in critical care and acute care settings.
I've never seen co- sleeping injuries or deaths. Maybe it's not as prevalent in my region of the USA, which is probably more conservative than average, very traditional, and composed of mostly upper mid- income to upper income households. I always worked for a for- profit hospital corporation so we didn't tend to get as many unusual lifestyle type trauma patients as the city/ county funded hospitals did. I've never personally known anyone who regularly slept with their infant or children in the same bed.
I wouldn't do it for a multitude of reasons.

I think that in order to know how frequent injuries and fatalities occur, there would have to be statistical data collected, and as far as I know, none exist.

I agree with you that fatalities from co-sleeping is totally preventable but it's really not my place to tell parents how to parent. I think any rational parent would know the risks to an infant and weigh the benefit to risk ratio before making the choice to sleep with their baby. Most parents DO take unnecessary risks at times with their children. I let my infant son nap in a family heirloom cradle with hand-carved spindles on each end which were an obvious violation of modern widths for baby bedding. We removed it from our home and gave it to the great-grandmother whose grandfather made it before he could raise his head or turn over, but it still qualifies as not prudent.

 

[Elley Mae]

Agree. It's the same here in Asia. Attachment parenting is just another word for common-sense driven parenting. As you say, if the child is hungry, feed it etc. Mothers often sleep with their babies in bed and this works out better for both babies and mothers. I've never understood why it's okay for cuddle with pets and have them sleep in the same bed but babies need to be treated as though they were in some military school! Here we find it very important to hold the baby and show love through touch. It's not even really talked about as it's thought to be as necessary and natural as breathing. Mothers here give their kids (even grown adults) head oil massages as it's though to be very good for the body. Mother's touch is sacred. I must also say add that people here love for their mothers to cook for them and sometimes even 'feed' them no matter what their age! It's hard to explain this but it's a cultural thing. And as Peaches said in her interview it really is true that there are fewer mental health problems here. People here turn out just fine. Not co-dependent, clingy, unstable adults. Basically healthy and happy! And having lived both in America and East I must make a generalization that families are held in greater regard here in Asia than in America, UK etc.

I think it's highly unlikely that Peaches harmed herself considering that she had her baby with her when she died.

I had never thought about it this way, Thank for this explanation that makes it make sense.

 

[mck16]

Normally, no, but as Peaches practised Attachment Parenting, having her two babies taken away "visiting" IS nefarious.

AP means your babies go NOWHERE without you.

I believe Thomas took the boys for safety reasons, and it was possibly HE who called the police out of concern for Peaches state of mind.

Losing her babies, even temporarily, would destroy her emotionally.

She clearly was just hanging on despite the apparent happiness of her life.

She spoke of her mother's death and how she wasn't "allowed" to grieve, sent back to school the next day like nothing happened.

This was her father's decision. The same man who apparently looked the other way while she played out her grief publicly over the last decade, and privately too (bulimia).

I don't know, there's just too much falseness with celebrity. Other people struggle, cry, break down, divorce, have eating disorders, but they have to eventually FACE their problems. Celebrities seem to not only ignore the issues, but to dress them up as NON ISSUES meanwhile dying inside.

I'm thinking Amy Winehouse, Charlotte Dawson down here, that beautiful girl from the Bachelor - young, beautiful, talented, on the top of their game but it's all a lie.

So sad. So preventable.

Is the father not included in the attachment? Were they divorced? ty

 

[SapphireSteel]

Is the father not included in the attachment? Were they divorced? ty

That statement was made when we thought he was away with both children. He wasn't, he only had one child, the older one. Perfectly normal.

AP parenting would mean that she would have been there with Thomas - the mother is the primary caregiver at breast feeding age. I'm not being pedantic, it's nature. It's not so much that he had the boys that is unusual, it's the fact that she wasn't there too that would have been strange, at that tiny age.

But now we know he only had one boy so you're spot on, no big deal. He obviously hadn't taken the children for safety reasons and is perfectly capable of caring for his own son so nothing unusual or alarming at all.

Anyway it's a moot point now because everything seems as it appeared family wise apparently, by which I mean loving and happy all four of them, Dad with toddler and Mum bonding at home with baby having a break, lovely and as it should be...but for some reason Thomas got worried and asked a friend to check her.

Perhaps because she was so active online and suddenly fell silent.

I really do think that anorexia/bulimia may be to blame. Her poor little body just shut down. There is no way she'd leave her boys willingly imo.

 

[SapphireSteel]

I get upset with media's emphasis on every aspect of a so-called celebrity's life and appearance.. then I stop and realize that the populace AND the celebrity themself drives the market. Celebs. hire publicist and managers to tell paparrazi where they will be for " candid" photos of them shopping, walking their dog, dining out with their celeb. family, etc.

There have always been " celebrity magazines" in our lifetimes but 50 years ago, the stories were mostly fluff pieces meant to draw attention to a celebrity or other famous person's attributes, contributions, date, appearance at a function, etc.
People were not labeled with shaming terms referring to their size, height, shape, skin, hair, eyes, feet, posture, clothing ( well, clothing was scrutinized in the early celeb. mags. but if a celeb. was having a bad day, it simply wasn't reported or photographed).

Peaches Geldof was a celeb. in some ways because she was born to 2 celeb. parents and has celeb. siblings. Then, she did seek the spotlight. She knew what the writers, especially in the U.K. publications focus on- everything she did, said, and everywhere she went was fodder for a column, a photo, or a mention.

Not being in a celebrity- driven world myself, I don't know how it feels to be there, or how it feels to leave it. I do know that from reading her quoted statements, Peaches, like most famous or semi- famous people, wanted to pick and choose what was published or otherwise reported, and how and when.
Peaches profited from celebrity status in the following ways:
-Her Twitter account had so many followers that she was given huge amounts of products free for her sons and for her own use in exchange for a tweet about the product or service.
-She was said to be a model, and a reporter. Not living in the U.K., I can't qualify or quantify these careers as true or not, but if true, then she was making her living in the spotlight and would have ceased to make money if the cameras and public went away.

Media attention is a double- edged sword and it has always seemed to me that the press finds the " soft spots" in women celebs., especially, and exploits them. The first time I realized this was with the push and pull of Princess Diana and the press.
I think Peaches shared a lot of Diana's insecurities and also her need for attention, affection and public accolades-- perhaps on her own terms, which is just not part of the package in this century.

I wish the world at large would go back to a kinder, gentler place. Where people who worked hard to be stars or otherwise recognized in their field were treated with respect and a sense of " specialness". Because they are special when they entertain or enlighten through their talents and charms, varied as they are.

:goodpost:

ITA~!!!!

We should STOP buying magazines that comment on women's weight for a start off... Who cares what size they are? Aren't they supposed to be famous because they're talented?

 

[txsvicki]

It's an ironic and sad tweet.



It's basically just how people around the rest of the world tend to parent and how we (people from the U.S., Britain, other parts of Northern Europe, Canada, New Zealand, Australia), used to parent until the Victorian era determined that feeding and sleeping schedules, as well as having babies "learn independence", by sleeping alone, not being held a lot and left to cry it out to "develop their lungs", was the way to effectively raise a child.

All that scheduling stuff is a direct result of Victorian era mindsets about sex and privacy and control. Nowhere and never did any of that occur prior to that era, for the most part. In Southern Europe, although things have changed somewhat due to most adopting an "Americanized" work schedule, it still doesn't occur as much. Kid is hungry, he gets fed. Tired? he sleeps. Usually where he is. Wants to be held? Oh, he is. Constantly.

And kids can sleep with their parents as long as they want to. Some of my cousins were still falling asleep every night (Spain) in their parents' bed at ages 11 and 13. (The parents would hoist them out when they wanted to go to sleep themselves).

I hardly believe any of that had to do with this gal's death.

Also, there is nothing about attachment parenting that states the parents can't get a babysitter or be apart from their children ever. Some extremists might view it that way, but the general issue seems to be about finding a caregiver who will adhere to the same parenting philosophy.

Mine were always on a schedule, but they themselves pretty much set it. A bottle every 4 hours that decreased gradually then eating breakfast at the same times when they wanted it. I learned each child's style of wanting to eat actual food. I sat up and rocked them to sleep, but did put them into their own crib when asleep. When older, they'd get in bed with us in the middle of night. They never sat around and cried, but would play and crawl and were happy.

 

[spamelope]

Here is the talk show that had had Peaches and an Ann Coulter-ish witch debating her. This video is what changed my mind about her. She is very articulate, and a bit impatient with Katie, as the woman, IMO was very rude and condescending. I wanted to hug Peaches after this exchange. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kY3v2KQkGmE&google_comment_id=z13gtvqranmuh1gtj23nfzly0uv4t33eu

 

[SeekingJana]

Not to derail this celeb. thread, but I fear that Tori Spelling may be the next deceased celeb. we hear about. She is apparently ill with an eating disorder. She is down to skin and bones. In her case, her husband has been cheating on her.
They have 4 very young children.... She seems determined to stay with the SOB.

 

[spamelope]

I think you're absolutely right, SeekingJana. She looks terrible. I hope this is a wakeup call for her and other young women who are literally starving themselves to death.

 

[SapphireSteel]

Sad and a reminder that $ doesn't buy happiness.

Apparently the drug culture is extremely strong, almost everyone in the public eye indulges despite a lot of PR to the contrary, but especially females who are under extreme pressure to get and remain thin.

Open the pages of People on any day of the week and you've possibly got 80% of the celebs with some rumoured eating disorder or other.

The quickest way to get thin is to increase your drug intake, as experienced by

Selena Gomez
Demi Lovato
Britney Murphy
Christina Ricci

and those are just the ones I can think of off the top of my head, the ones we KNOW about.

 

[SFBA]

Jumping on a soap box for a second here: I see a lot of posts about how "attachment parenting" is "just normal parenting" and "common sense parenting". I think it's important to be careful about pre-judging parenting styles. My brother and I were raised in the "Dr. Spock" era by very loving, family-oriented parents who showed us a lot of affection. However, we were on schedules, slept in our own beds every night from the day we came home from the hospital, and were allowed to "cry it out" if we were crying because we were over-tired (i.e. after our mom and/or dad determined that we weren't hungry, sick, in need of a diaper change, or having any other discernable problem).

Now, many years later I'm happy to say that my brother and I are very well-adjusted, happy adults and extremely close not only to each other but also to my parents, who are very family-focused people. So please be careful not to deem one parenting style "normal" over others. There are a lot of ways to successfully raise children, as long as the parents are loving and attentive.

Back on topic, this situation is such a tragedy to a family that has already had more than their fair share. I hope the little one wasn't alone with Mommy for too long before help arrived. So sad all around!

 

[spamelope]

SFBA, I think parents should be able to raise their children how they want to. Life would be boring if everyone thought the same way. I have this nagging feeling that Peaches may have died Sunday, since that's when her last tweet was, and she was a prolific poster. I'm actually kind of haunted by this.

 

[SeekingJana]

Spamelope, I have had the same concerns about the baby being left alone for a period of unspecified time.( I quoted your post but it messed up, sorry.)
Of course, we don't know where in the house they were found, it could have been in bed, with Peaches dying in her sleep, but if not, the fact that the baby, who surely could crawl and scoot on the floor was beside his mother's body, as is currently being reported, lends some credence to his possibly being alone for an unknown period of time.

I've known of 2 women who died with children under the age of one year, and in both instances, the children had mobilized themselves to a position beside their deceased mother. It was stated by LE in both cases that the mothers had been deceased long enough for the infants to have urgent needs for changing, feeding, comfort. One young mother which was the subject of a true crime book by Ann Rule about Alan Blackthorn and Shelia Belush, the victim and mother, Shelia, was murdered. In the house but unharmed by the killer were her quadruplets, and they had crawled around their mom close enough to be covered in her blood. In the other case I know about more personally, a young child left alone due to maternal suicide was found crying, probably from hunger. He was probably not alone for more than 6 hours, which is still so tragic.

I hope these two little boys will not be haunted by their mom's death the way Peaches was by her mother's. I think their ages should help them recover well with a consistent and loving caregiver who has a positive outlook and doesn't dwell on death with the boys as they grow. The idea that they are somehow " different" because of this needs to go away. I think Peaches felt different, isolated from other people emotionally because of her grief and the upheaval at such an impressionable age. Her little boys have an excellent chance for good and healthy lives in all ways if they are taught that they are special just for who they are, not for their mother's tragedies.
God bless them all.

 

[teedie2]

Here is the talk show that had had Peaches and an Ann Coulter-ish witch debating her. This video is what changed my mind about her. She is very articulate, and a bit impatient with Katie, as the woman, IMO was very rude and condescending. I wanted to hug Peaches after this exchange. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kY3v2KQkGmE&google_comment_id=z13gtvqranmuh1gtj23nfzly0uv4t33eu

This Katie person .. is she paid to sit there and make faces while others speak? I hope never to see a video that she is in again.

Peaches was a lovely young woman. I'm glad that she crammed as much mother-love for her children into the short time that she had with them. Very sad about this one.