SIDEBAR #17- Arias/Alexander forum

[PrincessSezMe]

We just live in different worlds. He was an old hippie biker that I don't relate with anymore. He was cool to my sister in the late 60's. My sister is still living in "that world". I'm fine.

I'm glad you're fine. We all need to vent sometimes.

 

[AuburnSchnauzer]

I'm glad you're fine. We all need to vent sometimes.

Thanks - I shouldn't have though...

 

[AuburnSchnauzer]

Someone remind me when JA is going to be put to death for the massacre of Travis Alexander.

 

[wsreader]

Zuri, try a Kong ball. You can put peanut butter or dog treats in it. Our lab mix LOVED that darn Kong.

 

[TexasGirlie]

I've been watching Roseanne and Golden Girls reruns all day...I need an intervention lol. For those looking for a new show, I've heard good things about Orange is the New Black. I don't know, I don't have Netflix or fancy cable. Just heard good reviews.

The boy turned out to be a typical dud...shocking! Oh well.

"Orange is the New Black" is awesome! Hubby & I watched the 1st two episodes after we put the kids to bed, & we love it!

 

[josie1986]

Morning all.

Panic has set in, ive just realised my son has his first day at school in 9days. I am mostly organised with uniform etc but I don't think I'm emotionally ready to let him go, already had a little cry.

My baby is growing up :cry:

Sent from my 'alternate reality' using my hippocampus

 

[Ricki]

Morning all.

Panic has set in, ive just realised my son has his first day at school in 9days. I am mostly organised with uniform etc but I don't think I'm emotionally ready to let him go, already had a little cry.

My baby is growing up :cry:

Sent from my 'alternate reality' using my hippocampus

I can understand how you feel. I cried with every child I sent to school. Not only did I cry the first day of Kindergarten but I cried every year on the first day of school. It meant the house would be very quiet and the end of summer was approaching fast. It will get easier as your son spends more days in school and you are alone. He's going to have so much fun. Wait until he comes home and tells you everything he has done and what he has learned. What your feeling is normal and things will be fine for the both of you. Hugs

 

[Mollyandme]

:truce:

Someone remind me when JA is going to be put to death for the massacre of Travis Alexander.

not soon enough! ugh

 

[Tulessa]

YesOrNo! Thank you! I made a trip to wally world and picked up the Potassium Gluconate (595 mg) and slept the entire night!! NOOOOO LEG CRAMPS! :blowkiss:

 

[LambChop]

YesOrNo! Thank you! I made a trip to wally world and picked up the Potassium Gluconate (595 mg) and slept the entire night!! NOOOOO LEG CRAMPS! :blowkiss:

We have not heard from YesOrNo for a couple of days. I miss her jokes. :floorlaugh:

 

[Tuba]

AuburnS, please explain what happened on N.G. for those like me who haven't been watching her.

 

[Tulessa]

We have not heard from YesOrNo for a couple of days. I miss her jokes. :floorlaugh:

She sent me the pm yesterday!!

 

[josie1986]

I can understand how you feel. I cried with every child I sent to school. Not only did I cry the first day of Kindergarten but I cried every year on the first day of school. It meant the house would be very quiet and the end of summer was approaching fast. It will get easier as your son spends more days in school and you are alone. He's going to have so much fun. Wait until he comes home and tells you everything he has done and what he has learned. What your feeling is normal and things will be fine for the both of you. Hugs

I was a blubbering wreck when he started nursery, so I hope I am not as bad this time. I still have one more to get to school (2years time) and thats me done.

No more kids for me, would be nice maybe further down the road but I can't risk my own life and leave the 2 I have with no mum.



Sent from my 'alternate reality' using my hippocampus

 

[Tuba]

Today, Nurmi's reply is due. I've been looking for a filing or a word on this. Of course, he will meet the requirement as long as he gets it in sometime August 5. We have not seen Juan Martinez's response to the Vacate Aggro motion either. I think the AZ Sup. Ct. denied Nurmi's motion in July. At least one or two news sources reported that but were they reliable? One was Huffington. It was a challenge to our judge's jurisdiction, so AZ Sup. Ct. looked at it.

 

[Ricki]

I was a blubbering wreck when he started nursery, so I hope I am not as bad this time. I still have one more to get to school (2years time) and thats me done.

No more kids for me, would be nice maybe further down the road but I can't risk my own life and leave the 2 I have with no mum.



Sent from my 'alternate reality' using my hippocampus

Maybe you can plan a play date with your other child the day your son starts school. Something to keep your mind off it. Maybe a manicure or something relaxing. I usually backed cupcakes on the first day of school. Something special for the kids to look forward to when they came home.

 

[PrincessSezMe]

I miss YESorNo's jokes too. Mine aren't as good as hers, but here's a funny story that always makes me smile.

Christmas with Louise

As a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay's kids' stockings were overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty.

One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don't sell those things at Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. If you've never been in an X-rated store, don't go. You'll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, "What does this do?" "You're kidding me!" or "Who would buy that?"

Finally, I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck so I could use the car pool lane during rush hour. Finding what I wanted was difficult. Love dolls come in many different models. The top of the line, according to the side of the box, could do things I'd only seen in a book on animal husbandry. I settled for 'Lovable Louise." She was at the bottom of the price scale. To call Louise a "doll" took a huge leap of imagination.

On Christmas Eve, with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after Santa had come and gone, I filled the dangling pantyhose with Louise's pliant legs and bottom. I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray. Then I went home and giggled for a couple of hours.

The next morning my brother called to say that Santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him VERY happy but had left the dog confused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. We all agreed that Louise should remain in her panty hose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional Christmas dinner.

My grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door. "What the he// is that?" she asked. My brother quickly explained, "It's a doll."

"Who would play with something like that?" Granny snapped. I had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut.

"Where are her clothes?" Granny continued.

"Boy, that turkey sure smells nice, Gran," Jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. But Granny was relentless.

"Why doesn't she have any teeth?" Again, I could have answered, but why would I? It was Christmas and no one wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, "Hang on Granny! Hang on!"

My grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, "Hey, who's the naked gal by the fireplace?" I told him she was Jay's friend. A few minutes later I noticed Grandpa by the mantel, talking to Louise. Not just talking, but actually flirting. It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa's last Christmas at home.

The dinner went well. We made the usual small talk about who had died, who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly Louise made a noise that sounded a lot like my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched from the panty hose, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. The cat screamed. I passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and Grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth to mouth resuscitation. My brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants and Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and sat in the car. It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember.

Later in my brother's garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of Louise's collapse. We discovered that Louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. Fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape, we restored her to perfect health. Louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies.

I think Grandpa still calls her.

 

[Zuri]

I am in a rare horrible funk, so I am reaching out. You all always make me feel better and today of all days, I need that. As I have been basically bed ridden and house bound for 4 years, I have grown accustomed to the solitary confinement. I have my dogs and my interaction with people in person is very limited. Today the 4 walls of my bedroom are closing in.

I have never been a "woe is me" kind of person. I do not feel sorry for myself as life is what it is. I have accepted my limitations and just deal with them as best I can. However that is not to say that I am not frustrated at times and today is one of those.

It has to do with my children. 25,22 and 19. I am seeing with more clarity that I have enabled them so much that their sense of entitlement is out of control. My 19 year old is the most responsible one out of the 3. My older 2 who are off the charts smart have made some excruciatingly painful choices for which I have picked up the literal and figurative tab.

I don't want to sacrifice any more. I want to cut them off from the gravy train with a chainsaw. I see them floating, not taking responsibity for anything and not working or getting an education. We as parents set them up for success only to have it fail. We have standards and expectations. Education is paramount. Why do they need an education when their parents have supported them in hopes they will achieve to their fullest potential.

I read up thread about sending them off when they are little to their first day of school. All those hopes and dreams we have when they are starting out on their journey to become the people they are meant to be.

I have failed. Miserably so. The time has come for me to cut the umbilical cord that stretches 1500 miles. Acceptance. I am having a hard time doing that as my disappointment is so great. Hope. I have had it for so long it now seems ridiculous to cling onto. Reality. I am finally facing it head on and I am hanging my head in shame. I am ashamed. Mostly of myself for not having been a better mother, for parenting out of fear of loss, for the enabling of their sense of entitlement, for working when perhaps I should have been home.

I love my children with every ounce of my being. I would die for them. They are good people, kind and generous. However, the entitlement flaw is masking the other. And that is of my own doing. Is it too late? Can I somehow make a legal U turn? How do I get through to them? I am so black and blue from beating myself up and I don't want to do that anymore. I am tired. I need perspective.

Sorry for being Debbie Downer today. Haven't slept in several nights as this is weighing very very heavily on my heart and mind. Any constructive advice would be so appreciated. Thanks for reading and letting me vent.

 

[PrincessSezMe]

I am in a rare horrible funk, so I am reaching out. You all always make me feel better and today of all days, I need that. As I have been basically bed ridden and house bound for 4 years, I have grown accustomed to the solitary confinement. I have my dogs and my interaction with people in person is very limited. Today the 4 walls of my bedroom are closing in.

I have never been a "woe is me" kind of person. I do not feel sorry for myself as life is what it is. I have accepted my limitations and just deal with them as best I can. However that is not to say that I am not frustrated at times and today is one of those.

It has to do with my children. 25,22 and 19. I am seeing with more clarity that I have enabled them so much that their sense of entitlement is out of control. My 19 year old is the most responsible one out of the 3. My older 2 who are off the charts smart have made some excruciatingly painful choices for which I have picked up the literal and figurative tab.

I don't want to sacrifice any more. I want to cut them off from the gravy train with a chainsaw. I see them floating, not taking responsibity for anything and not working or getting an education. We as parents set them up for success only to have it fail. We have standards and expectations. Education is paramount. Why do they need an education when their parents have supported them in hopes they will achieve to their fullest potential.

I read up thread about sending them off when they are little to their first day of school. All those hopes and dreams we have when they are starting out on their journey to become the people they are meant to be.

I have failed. Miserably so. The time has come for me to cut the umbilical cord that stretches 1500 miles. Acceptance. I am having a hard time doing that as my disappointment is so great. Hope. I have had it for so long it now seems ridiculous to cling onto. Reality. I am finally facing it head on and I am hanging my head in shame. I am ashamed. Mostly of myself for not having been a better mother, for parenting out of fear of loss, for the enabling of their sense of entitlement, for working when perhaps I should have been home.

I love my children with every ounce of my being. I would die for them. They are good people, kind and generous. However, the entitlement flaw is masking the other. And that is of my own doing. Is it too late? Can I somehow make a legal U turn? How do I get through to them? I am so black and blue from beating myself up and I don't want to do that anymore. I am tired. I need perspective.

Sorry for being Debbie Downer today. Haven't slept in several nights as this is weighing very very heavily on my heart and mind. Any constructive advice would be so appreciated. Thanks for reading and letting me vent.

Zuri, my friend, I am so sorry for what you're going through. Parenting is the hardest thing we will ever do in our lives, and they do not come with an instruction manual. I understand completely how you're feeling because I've made many of the same mistakes, and my two boys also have that sense of entitlement which seems to make them think we will always be there to bail them out and make things right.

Mine are 19 and 16, and I have had to take a hard line with them this past year because things have happened that make it no longer possible for me to give them what they want. It's very hard to say no. But I give them what the "need" and that is sometimes all a parent can do. They are fed, they will always have a roof over their head as long as I have one, and they know that I love them without question.

My oldest has many issues, including drug addiction, which he is currently in out patient rehab for. I blamed myself for a long time for his issues, but now I realize that they were of his own making. I didn't set him down that path, he chose it. His younger brother is the complete opposite. He's worked his entire summer this year in construction to buy himself the computer he wants. I raised them the same, so what makes him different? They are what they are is the only answer.

Please stop beating yourself up over your children's mistakes. It's part of them growing up and becoming responsible for their own destiny. I am certain, without a doubt, that you have been an outstanding mother. Now it is time for them to take control of their own lives and find their own way. Be there for them in the most important way, and love them unconditionally, but you must stop feeling like you have failed if you don't give them all of the material things in life that they desire. They will soon learn that if they want something badly enough, they have to pursue it on their own and work for it.

Hugs to you. It's time to take care of yourself now. :hug:

 

[KittyMomma]

Anyone have any tips on trying to get our kitty to eat?

Shes at the vet just now being kept in and I've to call back at 1pm but im so worried about her. She hasn't eaten or been to her litter box in two days. Shes isn't just a pet she's one of my kids, I'm distraught thinking of the worst outcome.

Sent from my 'alternate reality' using my hippocampus

There are liquid meds for this the vet can give you to get appetite going. I used to have a kitty that would get anorexic from time to time. You can try babyfood, too (turkey or chicken or such). It has a pretty strong smell that can tempt them. If all else fails, you can make a slurry of baby food and water in an oral syringe. It's not much fun and they don't like it, but it will keep them going while they get over their appetite problem.

 

[Ricki]

I am in a rare horrible funk, so I am reaching out. You all always make me feel better and today of all days, I need that. As I have been basically bed ridden and house bound for 4 years, I have grown accustomed to the solitary confinement. I have my dogs and my interaction with people in person is very limited. Today the 4 walls of my bedroom are closing in.

I have never been a "woe is me" kind of person. I do not feel sorry for myself as life is what it is. I have accepted my limitations and just deal with them as best I can. However that is not to say that I am not frustrated at times and today is one of those.

It has to do with my children. 25,22 and 19. I am seeing with more clarity that I have enabled them so much that their sense of entitlement is out of control. My 19 year old is the most responsible one out of the 3. My older 2 who are off the charts smart have made some excruciatingly painful choices for which I have picked up the literal and figurative tab.

I don't want to sacrifice any more. I want to cut them off from the gravy train with a chainsaw. I see them floating, not taking responsibity for anything and not working or getting an education. We as parents set them up for success only to have it fail. We have standards and expectations. Education is paramount. Why do they need an education when their parents have supported them in hopes they will achieve to their fullest potential.

I read up thread about sending them off when they are little to their first day of school. All those hopes and dreams we have when they are starting out on their journey to become the people they are meant to be.

I have failed. Miserably so. The time has come for me to cut the umbilical cord that stretches 1500 miles. Acceptance. I am having a hard time doing that as my disappointment is so great. Hope. I have had it for so long it now seems ridiculous to cling onto. Reality. I am finally facing it head on and I am hanging my head in shame. I am ashamed. Mostly of myself for not having been a better mother, for parenting out of fear of loss, for the enabling of their sense of entitlement, for working when perhaps I should have been home.

I love my children with every ounce of my being. I would die for them. They are good people, kind and generous. However, the entitlement flaw is masking the other. And that is of my own doing. Is it too late? Can I somehow make a legal U turn? How do I get through to them? I am so black and blue from beating myself up and I don't want to do that anymore. I am tired. I need perspective.

Sorry for being Debbie Downer today. Haven't slept in several nights as this is weighing very very heavily on my heart and mind. Any constructive advice would be so appreciated. Thanks for reading and letting me vent.

Kids are all different. I have 4 brought them up the same. It took some a little longer to get it. No, we don't support you for the rest of your lives. We had to get 1 out of trouble several times. She made mistakes we made mistakes. In the end we all learned and thankfully, it all worked out.
I think many kids think they are entitled today. They grow up with Ipads and their parents lap tops or their own. I have seen them get the most outrageously expensive gifts. What the heck will the expect when they turn 16, Mercedes?
We do the best we can and learn from our mistakes and hope they learn from theirs.
I am sure you brought up your children with the best intentions. I know you did just by your posts. Don't blame yourself. Some kids just expect way to much. Hugs and I hope you feel better soon.