Teresa N., Haleigh's paternal grandmother #2

[Schmerty_Jones]

I wish they could all be honest and put little Haleigh first. Unfortunately it's becoming worse instead of better. I frankly think TN is all about appearances& she probably knows Haleigh is no longer with us.
This whole attitude make me :sick:

 

[elle1919]

The basic facts of TN's behavior that cause the most concern for me are the enabling of her son to commit crimes and not face the consequences. I believe it is that behavior of TN's that has led to the day that HaLeigh was left with a teen coming down from drugs and opened the door to whatever happened to her. Crystal, good, badd or indifferent was not around and is not responsible for negligence in leaving HaLeigh in an unsafe enviornment. TN has enabled her son into bad decisions regarding the caregiver for his children. JMO

Perhaps when we have all the answers about what happened to Haleigh and the specific facts surrounding it, we could better determine if Ronald's past history is what led to her disappearance.

I for one need a few questions answered before I accuse the parents and grandparents of that missing child to be at fault. I do understand that others need less facts to come to conclusions.

 

[Be Careful]

Hi Be careful. Welcome to WS.

Hi and thank you! I've been following this case since very early on and stay confused. I've propped my chaise on the fence.

 

[stilettos]

Perhaps when we have all the answers about what happened to Haleigh and the specific facts surrounding it, we could better determine if Ronald's past history is what led to her disappearance.

I for one need a few questions answered before I accuse the parents and grandparents of that missing child to be at fault. I do understand that others need less facts to come to conclusions.

Elle...we do agree to disagree. I have a question though...do you honestly think TN's endorsement of RC's relationship with an underage minor....in conflict of the laws of the state of FL, was not enabling him?

 

[RoseRed]

I agree, I question the sanity of anyone putting drug addled people up on a pedestal and singing their praises. However, I still maintain that TN was solely addressing the interactions she saw between Misty and the children before Haleigh went missing.

This post, BBM, deserves more than a mere thank you :clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap:

 

[RoseRed]

Elle...we do agree to disagree. I have a question though...do you honestly think TN's endorsement of RC's relationship with an underage minor....in conflict of the laws of the state of FL, was not enabling him?

I do not agree and do not see the big deal being made about the ages of RC and MC.

 

[Granna6]

I feel so very bad for all concerned in this case. I know if I was the mother, aunt or grandmother of a missing child, niece/nephew or grandchild I would be an absolute blubbering idiot. Probably most, if not all of those concerned, wish they had worded things they said differently. I know I have tried to take what each one has said and play it over in my mind how they must be feeling as they have been interviewed by different people. Bottom line for me is little HaLeigh is missing, it seems (JMO) each of them is hiding/not telling something they know. IMO, they all need to put all the cards flat out onto the table for LE and for the sake of little HaLeigh.

I agree. When you are thrown into the limelight for the first time, it's very disconcerting. I think the wisest thing TN has said publicly is that all she wants is for the perpetrator(s) to be revealed, whomever it involves. I also think it is wise to stay neutral and above the fray, as much as it is possible for a grandmother to do so. That being said, this whole incident actually began years ago, with an unstable home environment and goings-on that set the stage for this type of event (IMO).

As I said on another thread, my sister went missing about 25 years ago. She disappeared by her own will and staged it to look like an accident, actually running her car into a river. At a time like that, a family is thrown into the midst of a drama in which time stops. You don't eat, sleep, or venture out of the house for fear of missing that phone call. Each family member has a theory, and the police have their unbiased, objective theories that may even contradict the family. In our case, because of certain evidence, the police knew from the beginning that it was staged. At the time, we were reluctant to believe them. A series of personal crises led to that event (her disappearance)--crises that we family members were unaware of. All turned out well, praise God, and my sister called two weeks later and was eventually restored to what became a marvelous life after that incident.

There is so much more than meets the eye here with Haleigh's disappearance. And family dynamics don't just stop when something like this happens. They have ingrained ways of relating to each other that may seem convoluted and contradictory.

 

[elle1919]

Elle...we do agree to disagree. I have a question though...do you honestly think TN's endorsement of RC's relationship with an underage minor....in conflict of the laws of the state of FL, was not enabling him?

Sorry it's taken so long to reply for some reason my computer keeps logging me off WS!

I am happy to answer your question but I am familiar with your posts and you are familiar with mine so you probably won't like my answer.....but I will answer for you anyway.:innocent:

I do not feel that Ronald's relationship with Misty was in conflict of the laws of FL. Misty was at the least 16 years old when she entered into the relationship with Ronald and it is quite apparent that many young adults are sexually active at an age younger than that. I don't think underage sex is okay...ever. However, the people responsible for assuring that Misty was not engaging in underage sex were her parents. The same parents that did not enforce school attendance after grade 6. While I would discourage my own daughter from entering into a sexual relationship with a 25 year old man, no-one in Misty's inner circle seemed to think her relationship with Ronald was breaking the law. Her mother, her father, her brothers, her sister in laws are all accountable.

 

[elle1919]

something is very wrong with my computer!....lol

 

[stilettos]

Sorry it's taken so long to reply for some reason my computer keeps logging me off WS!

I am happy to answer your question but I am familiar with your posts and you are familiar with mine so you probably won't like my answer.....but I will answer for you anyway.:innocent:

I do not feel that Ronald's relationship with Misty was in conflict of the laws of FL. Misty was at the least 16 years old when she entered into the relationship with Ronald and it is quite apparent that many young adults are sexually active at an age younger than that. I don't think underage sex is okay...ever. However, the people responsible for assuring that Misty was not engaging in underage sex were her parents. The same parents that did not enforce school attendance after grade 6. While I would discourage my own daughter from entering into a sexual relationship with a 25 year old man, no-one in Misty's inner circle seemed to think her relationship with Ronald was breaking the law. Her mother, her father, her brothers, her sister in laws are all accountable.

Thanks for the answer. I think the perpetrator of the crime is responsible.....for his Mom to basically condone it...not good. We approach victimization by statutory rape differently. I can accept that....thanks again.

 

[stilettos]

I do not agree and do not see the big deal being made about the ages of RC and MC.

The big deal is actually made by the state of FL. They have the statute that forbids that behavior by law. Prosecution or not....thoughts on the matter or not...it is against the law. Law breakers have a propensity to continue to break the law....pertinent to the case for that reason.

 

[nomoresorrow]

IMO the things TN has said regarding Misty's motherly role, could have been said, not to denigrate CS in any way, but rather to speak to her opinion of Misty's treatment/interaction with the children in a way people would understand. One can choose to think it's a put down or one can choose not to. We don't know what was in TN's head when she said those things.

I'd agree with your opinion on this but for the fact that TN habitually used/uses the "mother-like" references when speaking about Misty's relationship with Haleigh & Jr. And as far as TN using the terms that she did in describing that relationship in a way that people understand, people understand, "Her and the children had a very good relationship and the children adored her and she adored them..." just fine so I don't think that you can contribute TN's choice of words/terms used as her being so gracious as to help people better understand - GMAB. I agree that I may not know what was going through TN's mind as none of us know that about anyone but that's why we use words to communicate with one another, to help interpret what is in our heads... I make my assessment & evaluation based upon several television appearances/imterviews whereby TN's repeatedly uses these "mother-like" comparison terms when describing Misty's relationship with Haleigh and Jr. I don't need to be a mind reader in order to understand the meaning in her use of words and/or terms spoken repeatedly on several different occassions.

I am a stepmother, I fulfilled a motherly role, I was like a mother to them, I loved them like a mother, they wanted me to marry their father and be "a mother" to them, none of that however has anything to do with their own, biological mother, just a way to describe the way I treated them and the way they viewed me. It doesn't indicate or imply their biological mother didn't do the same and more or elevate me to the status of their "birth mother". It's just a way of describing the situation that people understand.

There's nothing better in my opinion than for children from split/divorced homes to come out of it with more people loving them, whether that's a new gf/wife or a new bf/husband. But in this case TN's repeated, televised comments about Misty's "mother-like" role/relationship was clearly done to indicate and imply something - and she was/has been quite effective with some...

I am sure if TN wanted to do be "cruel" to CS, there are more, concrete, factual ways she could go about doing that it she so desired.

I disagree, that isn't normally how passive-aggressives behave. Having dealt with passive-aggressives AND being the type myself that would much rather "put it all out on the table," putting it "all out on the table" for PA's is like asking them to relinquish their (perceived) power.
It's a game to them, one that they find great enjoyment in because, in a sense, it messes with people's minds. When confronted by somebody about a comment that is an obvious implication toward them, this provides the PA an added opportunity to cowardly strike by telling the person that they took their comment(s) all wrong, adding something like, "you must be paranoid" and then they take on the act of the "wounded-one", asking how you could even think for a moment that they would ever be so cruel as to say something like that... The game is won (this round) when the PA has the person (their target) feeling like a and begging them for forgiveness for ever thinking such a thing in the first place... very sick IMO.


JMHO -

 

[lonetraveler]

something is very wrong with my computer!....lol

elle, I have been having the same computer problems that you seem to be. I'm logged off about every 12 to 15 minutes and have to log back on. This happens while I'm posting, reading or anything. I refresh often but it doesn't make any difference. I share your frustration.

 

[Novice Seeker]

Sorry it's taken so long to reply for some reason my computer keeps logging me off WS!

I am happy to answer your question but I am familiar with your posts and you are familiar with mine so you probably won't like my answer.....but I will answer for you anyway.:innocent:

I do not feel that Ronald's relationship with Misty was in conflict of the laws of FL. Misty was at the least 16 years old when she entered into the relationship with Ronald and it is quite apparent that many young adults are sexually active at an age younger than that. I don't think underage sex is okay...ever. However, the people responsible for assuring that Misty was not engaging in underage sex were her parents. The same parents that did not enforce school attendance after grade 6. While I would discourage my own daughter from entering into a sexual relationship with a 25 year old man, no-one in Misty's inner circle seemed to think her relationship with Ronald was breaking the law. Her mother, her father, her brothers, her sister in laws are all accountable.

IMO, seemed like Ronald failed Misty also.

Novice Seeker

 

[nomoresorrow]

The big deal is actually made by the state of FL. They have the statute that forbids that behavior by law. Prosecution or not....thoughts on the matter or not...it is against the law. Law breakers have a propensity to continue to break the law....pertinent to the case for that reason.

Unfortunately there are some who feel that laws, which ones to follow or not, are for the pickin & choosing. Just because someone doesn't agree with it and/or they or a family member has violated this law, please don't try to sell it here to those that support and uphold the law as though we're in the wrong on this issue.

It's sad that this is even up for debate, that there are those who still, in 2009, have to be told that it's not alright for an adult to have sex with a child!! Makes me :furious: and :sick: - JMHO -

 

[lonetraveler]

Game plan #1; Elevate Misty in order to reflect positively on Ronald.
Game plan #2; When/If Misty becomes more of a liability than an asset to Ronald's public persona, throw Misty under the bus. IMO this explains the call to TM.

JMHO -

You pretty much nailed it IMO. I am also of the opinon that TN was very instrumental in facilitating the stealing of the children from their mother. She puts one face out to the public and totally another one inside the family.

 

[nomoresorrow]

You pretty much nailed it IMO. I am also of the opinon that TN was very instrumental in facilitating the stealing of the children from their mother. She puts one face out to the public and totally another one inside the family.

ITA lone - as though she thinks that somehow she can right her own wrongs from the past through her son's relationship with his children. It may make her (TN) feel better but it's not supposed to be about "her" anymore, it's supposed to be about HaLeigh & Jr's feelings and needs first/only - that was and continues to be the problem with this family; adults who made/make mistakes, can't or won't admit it and take responsibility for it, then place the blame everywhere else on everyone else and do anything they can to make themselves feels better for doing/not doing something they should/shouldn't have done; even if it hurts their kids (grandkids). JMHO -

 

[Be Careful]

I agree. When you are thrown into the limelight for the first time, it's very disconcerting. I think the wisest thing TN has said publicly is that all she wants is for the perpetrator(s) to be revealed, whomever it involves. I also think it is wise to stay neutral and above the fray, as much as it is possible for a grandmother to do so. That being said, this whole incident actually began years ago, with an unstable home environment and goings-on that set the stage for this type of event (IMO).

As I said on another thread, my sister went missing about 25 years ago. She disappeared by her own will and staged it to look like an accident, actually running her car into a river. At a time like that, a family is thrown into the midst of a drama in which time stops. You don't eat, sleep, or venture out of the house for fear of missing that phone call. Each family member has a theory, and the police have their unbiased, objective theories that may even contradict the family. In our case, because of certain evidence, the police knew from the beginning that it was staged. At the time, we were reluctant to believe them. A series of personal crises led to that event (her disappearance)--crises that we family members were unaware of. All turned out well, praise God, and my sister called two weeks later and was eventually restored to what became a marvelous life after that incident.

There is so much more than meets the eye here with Haleigh's disappearance. And family dynamics don't just stop when something like this happens. They have ingrained ways of relating to each other that may seem convoluted and contradictory.

I'm so glad things turned out well for your sister and all of you. What a trying time you and your family had to go thru, but thank God all is well now.

Yes, the family dynamics here are so very complicated and disturbing. I look at each and every one of the family members that have been on different shows and in interviews and for a brief moment I see their side, feel their feelings of pain. In a perfect world they would all come together and do what is right for HaLeigh and HaLeigh only. Pointing fingers, bashing one another, fighting and bickering, how is that helping to find out where Haleigh is and what happened to her? I just wish someone in the family would take the high road and do what is right and good for this precious, missing little girl.

 

[texasmommy39]

And txmommy?

tia

I am here incognito most of the time now. Like I said I don't need to get dirty in the trenches. lol

 

[elle1919]

Unfortunately there are some who feel that laws, which ones to follow or not, are for the pickin & choosing. Just because someone doesn't agree with it and/or they or a family member has violated this law, please don't try to sell it here to those that support and uphold the law as though we're in the wrong on this issue.

It's sad that this is even up for debate, that there are those who still, in 2009, have to be told that it's not alright for an adult to have sex with a child!! Makes me :furious: and :sick: - JMHO -

Hi nomoresorrow, I really just wanted to respond to the part of your post that I bolded. I am in agreement with you that it is not okay for an adult to have sex with a child. I am sorry you got the idea that I am debating that point because I am most certainly not. In my opinion we are not talking about a child when we are discussing Misty. I understand that you see her as a child but isn't it possible that in the eyes of the law she is not seen that way? What evidence do we have that she is still considered a child in the state of Florida? She was old enough to get married right? What if it turns out that the one person that LE states has been inconsistent this entire time turns out to be the responsible person in Haleigh's disappearance? Should she be charged as a child or charged as an adult?

I am in no way trying to pick and choose what laws should be followed, I am not trying to sell anything.

ETA....I do not disagree on the law. I disagree that Misty should be considered a child.