This Family is United

[RevCrim]

I so agree with you. I live here in the bible belt, but I'm from the Northeast. It's a real culture shock living here. I'm all for religion, but I'm not into this whole bit of God see's all, God know's all and God rights all wrongs. I think we have a right to demand justice when we see these wrongs, right here, right now!!!!

I do pray, don't get me wrong. I just think God gave us some gifts down here too like: courts, judges, juries and jails.

Yes indeed- God gave us the tools- it's how we use them that counts-

 

[gitana1]

I find the whole "You may hate and despise us, but you will not break us apart." to be a load of bull. This family is so beyond dysfunctional. It appears to me that Lee and Cindy say what they think people want to hear and in the process they look like fools! ALl in all I thought the service was beautiful. Georges message was truly heartfelt and I believe pure. The memorial service though was about Caylee not about being "united" talk about Caylee and your love for her the memories you have of her. I think Cindy saying that Caylee was just like her mother was twisted and sick. Caylee "has your compassion." Lets just assume for a moment that KC is completely innocent of any involvement at all, does a compassionate mother wait 31 days to report her child missing? Does a compassionate person tell lie after lie after lie while family and friends wait for the truth? I don't think so, that kind of logic is twisted. They appear to me to be re-creating a life in their own minds that they did not live, attempting to make things appear to be more normal than they are/were. I just don't get it. On another note and this may make people mad but, they had no family step forward to offer their support, no friends/ co-workers step forward, no pastor or church family step forward and yet yesterday they suddenly became what appeared to be a strong family of faith. Don't buy it, not for one minute. I actually feel rather bad for saying that but, after all that has gone on it appears to me that they are attempting to be/act like who they think the public wants them to be. My dad is an attorney and he told me once that everyone in prison becomes "born again." Oh really! I am a christian and I do hope that this crisis is the family brings them to a saving knowledge and a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I do believe that there is forgiveness for KC but she should still be held accountable for her behavior. I believe the same is true for anyone else in the Anthony family that may have knowledge of what happened. OK I have gone off on a tangent and need to stop. Sorry if anyone is offended, guess I needed a release.

I thought it was pretty common knowledge that a lot of times tragedy causes people to want to get closer to God. This family has been through so much and it's not over: The loss of thier innocent and beloved grandbaby and the incarceration of one of their own, accused of the murder of that grandbaby. Incomprehensible horror for one family to go through. If that family is not very functional to begin with, can you believe what that would do? I think it makes perfect sense that this family would look to God to help them with an unmanageable pain. I'm not sure why some people feel this is artifice on their part. After all, the pastor actually said he was helping them, GA specifically, with his faith, to get it back. I wish them luck with that.

 

[kgeaux]

I am curious about what this statement means. Opinions, anyone?

I think it means nothing will destroy the love they have for one another and the bond they feel towards one another.

 

[gitana1]

George is the only one I can follow when he is speaking. The rest have this bizarre, run on convoluted way of speaking using big words inappropriately. Thats why everyone always thinks they are talking in secret code. Their phrasing is wierd. Like its stream of consciousness. I I don't know what this is called but thats how they talk.

I think it's lack of education. But, they are trying to sound a bit more intellectual in keeping with the gravity of the situation. I feel sorry for them.

 

[kgeaux]

Cindy was sure heavy on the caressing of George and Lee while they spoke at the memorial. That struck me. I think she sees herself as the one who brings comfort. (Very much an RN quality). She still looks very thin, I hope she is receiving comfort for herself and allowing herself to need.

I totally agree with you. My sis is an RN, and she comforts us in times of sorrow in much the same way. TLC comes naturally to nurses, at least to good ones!

--------------------------------------------------

This deserves a thread unto itself: I am broken.

What does that mean?

IMO, it means "Losing Caylee has destroyed a part of me. My sister is accused of killing her, and the thought of that leaves me gasping. My father has tried to kill himself over this, and I am so worried about him that I can't stand it. I have trouble lifting my head off of my pillow in the morning. I have trouble drawing air into my lungs, willing my heart to beat."

His grief was apparent, at least to me. He LOOKS like a broken man.

This "petting" was raised in another thread but it bears repeating. I only watched a couple of snippets from the entire show, and that continuous petting of George and Lee was downright weird. It was about control, Cindy staying on top of things. It was not a gesture of comfort. The guys were doing okay all by themselves. But she had to place herself in the limelight as well. Neither of the men stroked Cindy like that. You can tell who is running the show, and I can see the invisible strings connected to that "comforting" hand.

Gah! The more I think about it, the more monstrous she appears to me. I think that any book written about this case should be entitled, Mommy Dearest.

Gee, I could not disagree with you more if I tried!

 

[Friday]

Respectfully snipped by me.

To me, it means that they are about ready to blow to smithereens, but still there's some odd glue that will hold them together. I've never seen a family TALK so much about how 'together' they are...when they are obviously so many bits and pieces of one big dysfunctional blob. This families idea of being 'united' is a big part of their problem, in my humble opinon. They make it into US vrs. THEM when they really shouldn't.

I have to agree with you. Normally the concept of a "close family," is something we revere and admire--it's sacrosanct and so we tend to feel guilty for saying anything to harm or belittle the Anthonys' desire to preserve their Family. The truth, however, is that the Family unit they are so proud of and which they so zealously safeguard, is as destructive to its members--and as unwholesome--as a cult. I know they never meant for things to go so wrong, but the facts are indisputable and horrible: This small, closely-knit family of 5 has yielded up one murderer; one dead baby who should have and could have been protected; one suicidal father; one relentlessly controlling and unabashedly dishonest mother; and one son with anger and defiance issues deep enough to cause him to attend his "beloved" neice's solemn public memorial without tie or jacket and then to "speak in tongues" in order to bewilder the mourners. When it comes to this family's demand to proudly preserve its unity, all I can say is, God help them if they do preserve it.

I say all this without malice. I truly pity their plight and their pain, and their seeming inability or unwillingness to step away, into the light of reality and honesty. Maybe little Caylee will be able to help and guide one or two of them.

 

[elfie]

This "petting" was raised in another thread but it bears repeating. I only watched a couple of snippets from the entire show, and that continuous petting of George and Lee was downright weird. It was about control, Cindy staying on top of things. It was not a gesture of comfort. The guys were doing okay all by themselves. But she had to place herself in the limelight as well. Neither of the men stroked Cindy like that. You can tell who is running the show, and I can see the invisible strings connected to that "comforting" hand.

Gah! The more I think about it, the more monstrous she appears to me. I think that any book written about this case should be entitled, Mommy Dearest.

Petting is normally associated with animals or as a euphemism with a sexual connotation and is inappropriate as a characterization of a comforting gesture during a memorial. I couldn't disagree with you more, either.

 

[elementary]

Petting is normally associated with animals or as a euphemism with a sexual connotation and is inappropriate as a characterization of a comforting gesture during a memorial. I couldn't disagree with you more, either.

A thesaurus would disagree with you.

 

[itsyourworld]

Petting is normally associated with animals or as a euphemism with a sexual connotation and is inappropriate as a characterization of a comforting gesture during a memorial. I couldn't disagree with you more, either.

would you prefer the word stroking? how about the word caressing? feeling? fondling? i think the only synonym we can agree it WASNT was "patting" because it was definitely any of the other words. and it creeped me the heck out. creeped me out when i saw her stroking his leg on national TV on (i think) the today show. so if it is inappropriate to call it something it WAS at a memorial, it was even more inappropriate to have done it at a memorial.

 

[butwhatif?]

Hi! Now, your post brings me full circle to the major point I want to make, which is: Knowing that Caylee is with the Lord is comforting, but that does not make everything "alright" and erase the fact that she was murdered. Why can't the family say: We intend to find the murderer? Even if it is their own daughter.

Because the memorial was about celebrating Caylees life. Every other day has been about her murder.
And they have said they 'want to know the truth- no matter what.'
Nothing makes caylees death ok. Nothing erases it. But they have to find comfort wherever they can get it.

United- I'm thinking LA means 'no matter how much the public, the media and LE tries to tear us down, or rip us apart...We are not going to let them break us or our spirits.
No more divide and conquer.We are a stronger unit in spite of our pain and loss and all the negativity that people have thrown at us'
JMO

 

[elfie]

A thesaurus would disagree with you.

A thesaurus includes similar words with connotations that may be employed to be derogatory in nature, or not. The context reveals the intent and follows a pattern to dehumanize a gesture that is very basic to human nature: the desire to comfort when odds are little comfort can be given.

 

[elfie]

would you prefer the word stroking? how about the word caressing? feeling? fondling? i think the only synonym we can agree it WASNT was "patting" because it was definitely any of the other words. and it creeped me the heck out. creeped me out when i saw her stroking his leg on national TV on (i think) the today show. so if it is inappropriate to call it something it WAS at a memorial, it was even more inappropriate to have done it at a memorial.

A caress is fine. Here again, an attempt to characterize appropriate behavior as wholly inappropriate.

 

[kgeaux]

would you prefer the word stroking? how about the word caressing? feeling? fondling? i think the only synonym we can agree it WASNT was "patting" because it was definitely any of the other words. and it creeped me the heck out. creeped me out when i saw her stroking his leg on national TV on (i think) the today show. so if it is inappropriate to call it something it WAS at a memorial, it was even more inappropriate to have done it at a memorial.

Sorry, but that's not right. She patted (see, we don't all agree it WASNT was "patting" ) and rubbed. I don't think her actions were inappropriate on the morning show and I don't think they were inappropriate at the memorial. A memorial is designed to allow for the expression of grief and for the reaching out to comfort those who are grieving. Memorials are emotional. They will evoke emotional responses.

Wives and mothers are comforters. It's what we do when we see our loved ones hurting. I could no more ignore the pain of my sons and my husband than I could ignore a two foot sword sticking out of my right eyeball. If I were to see grief and suffering in my family, I would be compelled to reach out to them, to offer what ever means of comfort and support was available to me.

I also rub my husband's leg all the time when we are seated next to one another, and he frequently rubs mine. Condemn us if you will, but 33 years of marriage has not dulled our need to reach out to one another. We're so rottenly evil to the core that we actually KISS in church! in front of our pastor! We don't engage in lengthy kisses, passionate kisses or anything of that nature, but we do kiss each other to express our love. We are touchers. I know that's maybe not something that is common to all families, heck I have a friend whose parents never spoke the words "I love you" much less reached out to touch her.....they expressed their love and comfort other ways. But I suspect that Cindy is a toucher---she's an RN, and those drawn to that career are probably high in compassion and high in the desire to reach out to heal.

While the thesauras may offer words such as "stroking" as a substitute for rubbing, there is a difference. To say a doctor rubbed a bump on my leg has a far different inference than to say he stroked my leg. One has more of a sexual connotation to it. While "petting" may be a substitute for "patting" I would offer that most people pet their animals and pat their children on the back.

 

[Lexington]

:star1:

Respectfully snipped by me.



I have to agree with you. Normally the concept of a "close family," is something we revere and admire--it's sacrosanct and so we tend to feel guilty for saying anything to harm or belittle the Anthonys' desire to preserve their Family. The truth, however, is that the Family unit they are so proud of and which they so zealously safeguard, is as destructive to its members--and as unwholesome--as a cult. I know they never meant for things to go so wrong, but the facts are indisputable and horrible: This small, closely-knit family of 5 has yielded up one murderer; one dead baby who should have and could have been protected; one suicidal father; one relentlessly controlling and unabashedly dishonest mother; and one son with anger and defiance issues deep enough to cause him to attend his "beloved" neice's solemn public memorial without tie or jacket and then to "speak in tongues" in order to bewilder the mourners. When it comes to this family's demand to proudly preserve its unity, all I can say is, God help them if they do preserve it.

I say all this without malice. I truly pity their plight and their pain, and their seeming inability or unwillingness to step away, into the light of reality and honesty. Maybe little Caylee will be able to help and guide one or two of them.

Excellent right on the money post.

 

[sleuthin4fun]

I thought it was pretty common knowledge that a lot of times tragedy causes people to want to get closer to God. This family has been through so much and it's not over: The loss of thier innocent and beloved grandbaby and the incarceration of one of their own, accused of the murder of that grandbaby. Incomprehensible horror for one family to go through. If that family is not very functional to begin with, can you believe what that would do? I think it makes perfect sense that this family would look to God to help them with an unmanageable pain. I'm not sure why some people feel this is artifice on their part. After all, the pastor actually said he was helping them, GA specifically, with his faith, to get it back. I wish them luck with that.

I agree that in times of trial we do grow closer to God as we should but, is it genuine when we only look for him when we are in the valley and never praise him when we are on the mountain top? I can only imagine the horror that they have gone through over the loss of Caylee. Then the unimaginable that KC may be responsible for her death. I think that this family was an unbelievable mess to begin with and that this situation only magnified the problems. It is just my observation that the only one who I feel is sincere in all of this is GA. I think that KC learned all of her mnnipulative tricks from her mother and LA has some serious anger issues (maybe rightfully so) I do say all this knowing absolutely nothing about them other than what I see on t.v and what I read here. Maybe I am way off.

 

[sleuthin4fun]

Because the memorial was about celebrating Caylees life. Every other day has been about her murder.
And they have said they 'want to know the truth- no matter what.'
Nothing makes caylees death ok. Nothing erases it. But they have to find comfort wherever they can get it.

United- I'm thinking LA means 'no matter how much the public, the media and LE tries to tear us down, or rip us apart...We are not going to let them break us or our spirits.
No more divide and conquer.We are a stronger unit in spite of our pain and loss and all the negativity that people have thrown at us'
JMO

The memorial for the most part was beautiful. Was it a celebration of Caylee's life? I guess everyone is entitled to their own opinion on that. I was truly touched by GA and his memories of Caylee. CA though and LA in my opinion did not speak much about their love for Caylee. They spoke more I felt about their love and support for KC although I am not sure who or what LA was speaking about. They just disturb me. Of course they love KC but, that does not mean you hide your head in the sand and not look at the obvious. If GA,LA and CA are standing united good for them, if their motives are pure. If it is to continue to be evasive and not tell the whole truth so that Caylee's killer will be brought to justce then shame on them.

 

[sleuthin4fun]

Downright cold explanation but probably close to the truth.

Makes it sound like Caylee was disposable!!!

 

[costalpilot]

I am curious about what this statement means. Opinions, anyone?

its obvious....it couldn't be clearer. Each of the family made it plain.

 

[sleuthin4fun]

its obvious....it couldn't be clearer. Each of the family made it plain.

Where did this come from?

 

[Puzzler]

(cross-posting this from the Caylee may be cremated thread, hope that's okay.)

This thought has been bugging me since this morning. Perhaps the Anthonys meant "this family is united" literally as well as figuratively?

When George mentioned he had a special "locket" during the service, my first thought was the type of locket they offer to people when loved ones are cremated. (Men don't usually wear or carry lockets, imo.)

Interesting thought! Did a quick Google search on "cremains locket" and was actually astonished by the quantity and variety of jewelry out there meant to hold cremains. I bet that's exactly what was meant by picking out jewelry for Caylee.

They also make cremains bracelets (an example here: http://www.funeral-urn.com/cremation-jewelry-titanium-bracelet.aspx.) Did anyone get a clear look at the bracelet on Lee's wrist that he kissed twice? I wonder if the whole family is wearing Caylee around with them now. Would lend new meaning to the phrase "the family is united."

Now I'm wondering about the bracelet Baez and/or CA tried to smuggle into KC. Has it been confirmed it was a soft plastic Caylee bracelet? Is there anyway they were trying to get some of Caylee's cremains to her?