This Family is United

[Chilly Willy]

Perhaps it's a response to the people who called for George to leave Cindy and never go home again, or to the rumors that Lee and his parents are at odds.

 

[elementary]

A thesaurus includes similar words with connotations that may be employed to be derogatory in nature, or not. The context reveals the intent and follows a pattern to dehumanize a gesture that is very basic to human nature: the desire to comfort when odds are little comfort can be given.

Exactly! The sexual (and derogatory) connotation did not occur to me, but it did to you.

 

[elfie]

Exactly! The sexual (and derogatory) connotation did not occur to me, but it did to you.

Not just me:

Sorry, but that's not right. She patted (see, we don't all agree it WASNT was "patting" ) and rubbed. I don't think her actions were inappropriate on the morning show and I don't think they were inappropriate at the memorial. A memorial is designed to allow for the expression of grief and for the reaching out to comfort those who are grieving. Memorials are emotional. They will evoke emotional responses.

Wives and mothers are comforters. It's what we do when we see our loved ones hurting. I could no more ignore the pain of my sons and my husband than I could ignore a two foot sword sticking out of my right eyeball. If I were to see grief and suffering in my family, I would be compelled to reach out to them, to offer what ever means of comfort and support was available to me.

I also rub my husband's leg all the time when we are seated next to one another, and he frequently rubs mine. Condemn us if you will, but 33 years of marriage has not dulled our need to reach out to one another. We're so rottenly evil to the core that we actually KISS in church! in front of our pastor! We don't engage in lengthy kisses, passionate kisses or anything of that nature, but we do kiss each other to express our love. We are touchers. I know that's maybe not something that is common to all families, heck I have a friend whose parents never spoke the words "I love you" much less reached out to touch her.....they expressed their love and comfort other ways. But I suspect that Cindy is a toucher---she's an RN, and those drawn to that career are probably high in compassion and high in the desire to reach out to heal.

While the thesauras may offer words such as "stroking" as a substitute for rubbing, there is a difference. To say a doctor rubbed a bump on my leg has a far different inference than to say he stroked my leg. One has more of a sexual connotation to it. While "petting" may be a substitute for "patting" I would offer that most people pet their animals and pat their children on the back.

The derogatory is gleaned in relation to the entire context:

This "petting" was raised in another thread but it bears repeating. I only watched a couple of snippets from the entire show, and that continuous petting of George and Lee was downright weird. It was about control, Cindy staying on top of things. It was not a gesture of comfort. The guys were doing okay all by themselves. But she had to place herself in the limelight as well. Neither of the men stroked Cindy like that. You can tell who is running the show, and I can see the invisible strings connected to that "comforting" hand.

Gah! The more I think about it, the more monstrous she appears to me. I think that any book written about this case should be entitled, Mommy Dearest.

 

[elfie]

I agree that you could use the term "petted" in a respectful manner similar to:

She petted her daughters head and stroked her hair with longing for a yesteryear when she curled lovingly in her arms to read the nightly bedtime story.

 

[LisaNY]

I think he was referring to the recent speculation that there was/is a rift between the family members & that they were going to throw one another under the bus. Making it clear to the public and le that they are still supporting each other.

ETA - Although I have critiqued the A's words and actions, I do not see anything improper with her petting, patting, stroking, caressing, whatever you want to call it. I have sons, and sometimes a comforting gesture from me is stronger than any words I could possibly say. It's just a reminder that I am here, take my strength, give me your pain. Think of trying to comfort your newborn, softly stroking their back to quiet sobs. My sons will always be that small in my arms.

 

[passionflower]

IMO, the 'united'...........means united in the 5th amendment.
Partners in crime.
Won't testify against each other.
Like a pack deal........IMO

if united in love........everyone can tell; you don't have to tell people!

 

[Donna]

has anyone discussed the"C.M.A' thing....or is that a differant thread....L.P. said tonight that he knew it meant Casey...also stated rhat the fingerprints on the duct tape were in fact identified as Casey's...........................hmmmmmmm

 

[txsvicki]

The family member's speeches have bothered me so much after reading the transcript that I've gone back to a site and re read them. I believe that The Family United is their theme. George also talked about Families United, the families that are looking for their children. Maybe this is going to be their theme in the new work with missing children. Cindy didn't say these words, but George and Lee sure did.

 

[gitana1]

I agree that in times of trial we do grow closer to God as we should but, is it genuine when we only look for him when we are in the valley and never praise him when we are on the mountain top? I can only imagine the horror that they have gone through over the loss of Caylee. Then the unimaginable that KC may be responsible for her death. I think that this family was an unbelievable mess to begin with and that this situation only magnified the problems. It is just my observation that the only one who I feel is sincere in all of this is GA. I think that KC learned all of her mnnipulative tricks from her mother and LA has some serious anger issues (maybe rightfully so) I do say all this knowing absolutely nothing about them other than what I see on t.v and what I read here. Maybe I am way off.

I understand what your saying, but I think it is just degrees of religiosity. I help with the adult convert program at my church and many, many of them are people who are lost - sick, going through divorce, recent death in the family, something - do they not have a right to know God just because they did not seek him when things were good? Who are we to judge a person's attempts at a relationship with God, at any time?
Jesus reached out to the most forgotten of society, the lepers, the diseased, the prostitutes, criminals. Those were the ones he sought out and it was a revolutionary act. The Jewish hierarchy at the time denied those people entry to temple. Because Jesus did accept and embrace them, he began to win huge masses of followers who saw the beauty in what he preached, who saw the non-judgmental grace of it. His actions in reaching out to the outcasts of society, some of whom who did not love themselves, or others, revolutionized the religious experience and was so powerful, that he was ultimately crucified for it. It boggles my mind that we, as a society, have so strayed from the original teachings of Jesus that we now go back to the attitudes of those who condemened and killed him and judge pitiful, hopeless people in the darkest hour of their lives as they try in desparation to find the love of God to help them through. Sometimes it takes the lowest moment for a person to clearly see God. I'm not trying to create a religious discussion here, but I felt the need to address the sentiment in your post.
As far as the rest of the post, I agree that GA seems the most functional but I think they are all sincere in their feelings, even if they have psychological problems that distort those feelings or the manner in which they express them. I have no doubt, that no matter how manipulative CA may be, or how angry LA may be, they are suffering and want help and hope. I may not like their actions - many times I have been appalled and disturbed by their conduct both before and after the murder - but I know they are human beings who truly loved little Caylee and casey, despite her damaged soul. For that, they suffer more than any of us can likely imagine and so, my heart goes out to them and I hope they find the help and hope they seek.

 

[AZRiverRat]

Yes, united. Lee united with CMA online while his girlfriend Mallory sat in the front row without him.

United as he stood on the stage, pouting like a toddler denied a favorite toy.

United as Cindy hugged, swooned and gazed into the eyes of a singer onstage....Totally oblivious to George's presence right next to her.

United?

For what cause?

CMA
CMA
CMA

Until this family stands united for Caylee, they will always stand alone.

RIP, sweet Angel! You are loved.

 

[Friday]

(cross-posting this from the Caylee may be cremated thread, hope that's okay.)

This thought has been bugging me since this morning. Perhaps the Anthonys meant "this family is united" literally as well as figuratively?



Interesting thought! Did a quick Google search on "cremains locket" and was actually astonished by the quantity and variety of jewelry out there meant to hold cremains. I bet that's exactly what was meant by picking out jewelry for Caylee.

They also make cremains bracelets (an example here: http://www.funeral-urn.com/cremation-jewelry-titanium-bracelet.aspx.) Did anyone get a clear look at the bracelet on Lee's wrist that he kissed twice? I wonder if the whole family is wearing Caylee around with them now. Would lend new meaning to the phrase "the family is united."

Now I'm wondering about the bracelet Baez and/or CA tried to smuggle into KC. Has it been confirmed it was a soft plastic Caylee bracelet? Is there anyway they were trying to get some of Caylee's cremains to her?

OMG!!! George did say something about having a special locket at the memorial! And didn't Cindy remark about her jewelry, too--about the buttons, I know she did, but I don't recall what actual jewelry she had around her neck.

 

[GreenEyes727]

O/T kinda . . . where is a link to the full memorial? Thanks!

 

[natsound]

(cross-posting this from the Caylee may be cremated thread, hope that's okay.)

This thought has been bugging me since this morning. Perhaps the Anthonys meant "this family is united" literally as well as figuratively?



Interesting thought! Did a quick Google search on "cremains locket" and was actually astonished by the quantity and variety of jewelry out there meant to hold cremains. I bet that's exactly what was meant by picking out jewelry for Caylee.

They also make cremains bracelets (an example here: http://www.funeral-urn.com/cremation-jewelry-titanium-bracelet.aspx.) Did anyone get a clear look at the bracelet on Lee's wrist that he kissed twice? I wonder if the whole family is wearing Caylee around with them now. Would lend new meaning to the phrase "the family is united."

Now I'm wondering about the bracelet Baez and/or CA tried to smuggle into KC. Has it been confirmed it was a soft plastic Caylee bracelet? Is there anyway they were trying to get some of Caylee's cremains to her?

News reports around that time said it was indeed a soft bracelet with wording on it.

 

[natsound]

Perhaps it's a response to the people who called for George to leave Cindy and never go home again, or to the rumors that Lee and his parents are at odds.

I thought Lee and his parents were at odds. They still may be, in a sense. Really, I think they're all at different stages of acceptance, which I'm sure causes some tension.

 

[natsound]

A caress is fine. Here again, an attempt to characterize appropriate behavior as wholly inappropriate.

Thank you, elfie. Sometimes I am AMAZED at what I read here.

 

[kgeaux]

I agree that in times of trial we do grow closer to God as we should but, is it genuine when we only look for him when we are in the valley and never praise him when we are on the mountain top?

I've snipped your post just a little, I hope you don't mind.

It's certainly true that many people ignore God and their faith when times are good. And it is true that many will turn to Him in times of trouble. Some of those will fall away when their circumstances improve, some will remain faithful to Him.

We don't know yet which direction this family will go, but I can only hope and pray that their faith is strong enough to endure, and that it is lasting.

Perhaps it's a response to the people who called for George to leave Cindy and never go home again, or to the rumors that Lee and his parents are at odds.

That's true. Many people have speculated so many ugly things about this family; it may have been a response to that.

Regardless, it is kind of unsettling that some are so upset about a family's desire to remain united. It is even more upsetting to read posts by people saying they would turn their backs on their OWN flesh and blood over an accusation. God, please never let my love for my loved ones be so shallow! May my family always remain UNITED, no matter what.

I think he was referring to the recent speculation that there was/is a rift between the family members & that they were going to throw one another under the bus. Making it clear to the public and le that they are still supporting each other.

ETA - Although I have critiqued the A's words and actions, I do not see anything improper with her petting, patting, stroking, caressing, whatever you want to call it. I have sons, and sometimes a comforting gesture from me is stronger than any words I could possibly say. It's just a reminder that I am here, take my strength, give me your pain. Think of trying to comfort your newborn, softly stroking their back to quiet sobs. My sons will always be that small in my arms.

Lisa, that's beautiful, the analogy to how a mom comforts her newborn. Thank you.

Thank you, elfie. Sometimes I am AMAZED at what I read here.

Me too. If, that is, the thesaurus offers synonyms of amazed that go in the direction of "horrified" "unsettled"
"upset" maybe even "disgusted."

 

[Amil]

Respectfully snipped by me.



I have to agree with you. Normally the concept of a "close family," is something we revere and admire--it's sacrosanct and so we tend to feel guilty for saying anything to harm or belittle the Anthonys' desire to preserve their Family. The truth, however, is that the Family unit they are so proud of and which they so zealously safeguard, is as destructive to its members--and as unwholesome--as a cult. I know they never meant for things to go so wrong, but the facts are indisputable and horrible: This small, closely-knit family of 5 has yielded up one murderer; one dead baby who should have and could have been protected; one suicidal father; one relentlessly controlling and unabashedly dishonest mother; and one son with anger and defiance issues deep enough to cause him to attend his "beloved" neice's solemn public memorial without tie or jacket and then to "speak in tongues" in order to bewilder the mourners. When it comes to this family's demand to proudly preserve its unity, all I can say is, God help them if they do preserve it.

I say all this without malice. I truly pity their plight and their pain, and their seeming inability or unwillingness to step away, into the light of reality and honesty. Maybe little Caylee will be able to help and guide one or two of them.

You have summed up exactly what is on my mind.

 

[concentric]

If GA,LA and CA are standing united good for them, if their motives are pure. If it is to continue to be evasive and not tell the whole truth so that Caylee's killer will be brought to justce then shame on them.

----------------------

Here is an interesting point: Remember Cindy saying that she only wanted the "pure of heart" to be let into the ceremony? Comments anyone?

 

[icherish]

I thought the memorial was about solely for Caylee.

A memorial service generally isn't "soley" for or about the departed. It also for the living. moo

 

[magnolia]

Respectfully snipped by me.



I have to agree with you. Normally the concept of a "close family," is something we revere and admire--it's sacrosanct and so we tend to feel guilty for saying anything to harm or belittle the Anthonys' desire to preserve their Family. The truth, however, is that the Family unit they are so proud of and which they so zealously safeguard, is as destructive to its members--and as unwholesome--as a cult. I know they never meant for things to go so wrong, but the facts are indisputable and horrible: This small, closely-knit family of 5 has yielded up one murderer; one dead baby who should have and could have been protected; one suicidal father; one relentlessly controlling and unabashedly dishonest mother; and one son with anger and defiance issues deep enough to cause him to attend his "beloved" neice's solemn public memorial without tie or jacket and then to "speak in tongues" in order to bewilder the mourners. When it comes to this family's demand to proudly preserve its unity, all I can say is, God help them if they do preserve it.

I say all this without malice. I truly pity their plight and their pain, and their seeming inability or unwillingness to step away, into the light of reality and honesty. Maybe little Caylee will be able to help and guide one or two of them.

Excellent post Friday.:blowkiss: