Try to have some compassion

[harleysnana]

I am going by what Cindy told the press, that she is telling Casey how much she loves her and they are talking about the madness outside their house, and that asking her where Caylee is is the investigator's job.

Can I ask you and others what you think would happen if they told
Casey that they hated her for this?

Have you ever heard the saying that you can catch more bee's with honey?

Casey seems to have shut her parents out and IMO they hope that
if they let her know they still love her no matter what she may just tell
them what she has done!

I know Mark Hacking has been brought into this case because he was a
compulsive liar like Casey and his family did the exact thing.
They told him that no matter what they would be by his side
and that they loved him and guess what....
HE CONFESSED to them!

I'm sure deep down George wants to beat the truth out of Casey.
And Cindy probably is dying to tell Casey she hates her for doing this.

I can understand where they are coming from because I have imaged
myself in their shoes and it is a place I would not want to be.

Look in their eyes... you can see they hurt.
I think we should give them a break... they deserve it.
JMO

 

[Tx Nonna]

I understand where you are coming from-- i ,relate, totally.
However, what can they do? I know we all say , "I would be shaking crap out of her, beating her ..my best friend Amy here even says , she would kill her herself if it were her daughter... but seriously, i ask Amy and anyone... think about it, What could YOU really do to get her to talk, when she simpily just won't ? Even if terrible ,awful things were literally bestowed upon her to tell, I dont think she would...so what do you do?

Now, you see Cindy and George's side any?

Hi Annie.... ITA with what you are saying. All I can honestly say is, you could not pay me enough $$$ to be in their shoes right now! I think the men in the white coats would have to come and take me away by now.

 

[swa]

I'm not going to sit here and offer compassion for them -- when they are ENABLING their daughter.

Tim Miller for TES is in their house trying to trying to coordinate a search for their missing granddaughter -- and what is Casey doing? SHE'S ON THE FREAKING COMPUTER.

If that was my mom - -she would have dragged me out by the hair, sat my *advertiser censored* down and told me to start talking.

 

[ZooMomology]

I'm not going to sit here and offer compassion for them -- when they are ENABLING their daughter.

Tim Miller for TES is in their house trying to trying to coordinate a search for their missing granddaughter -- and what is Casey doing? SHE'S ON THE FREAKING COMPUTER.

If that was my mom - -she would have dragged me out by the hair, sat my *advertiser censored* down and told me to start talking.

Mine too, no doubt about it. I cannot believe they went on to the interview and allowed her to play on her computer. GMAB.

 

[icherish]

The Anthony's are deeply in denial. George literally screams his denials and he sounds so anguished...as if he's trying to convince himself as well as everyone else that Caylee's demise just isn't so. That is very obvious, imo.
It's also becoming more obvious that it's not just the grief...much of the denial is being perpetuated by Casey and her lawyer. Baez's job is Casey's defense, not finding Caylee. He is telling the A's not to trust LE because ultimately they are out to get their daughter regardless of where Caylee is. Baez tells them to listen to Casey, do what he tells them to do, and things will all work out. I believe they have been vulnerable and desperate enough that they put their faith in that. Almost like Stockholm Syndrome or brainwashing.... or drinking the kool-aid, as some would call it.

Sadly, the most important thing...the whereabouts of precious little Caylee... has all but gotten lost in the shuffle.

 

[Kim Ii]

Hi JBean/All,

I am SO glad to see this thread! I was beginning to think that I was but a few of those who genuinely grieve for this family. I am heartened there IS some compassion out there for Cindy, George and yes, as difficult as it may seem, Casey.

I am not a religious person per se, but I do believe in not judging others, as hard as that may be for we humans, to do. I think most of the anger I've been reading re: this case (both here at Websleuths and the 'other' forum ), emanates from our inability to UNDERSTAND the raw emotions we are viewing in this family. Plus, as hard as this may be to admit, I really do believe that many of us have what may be termed a 'mirror projection' as to what's been playing out here. Some of us realize we may be just one step shy of being in this family's shoes as well, and that's really a frightening thought.

How many of us live in perfect families? I didn't. We didn't have this type of dysfunction, but we had our moments! Do you know what I SEE when I see Cindy and George? I see two deeply flawed human beings, but human beings who raised a daughter they loved. How many of us wouldn't weep if we were to view Cindy's birth photos of Casey and viewed their many and I'm sure, cherished, photos of their daughter and videos -- SHE'S THEIR DAUGHTER. I'm sure they love her very much.

Given that, can you just for one moment understand how bitterly painful this must be for them?! Just put yourselves in their shoes -- and then add to that horrific pain -- the finality -- the fact that they know deep down inside, this beautiful creature they brought into this world and loved deeply, is the monster who killed their precious granddaughter? OMG...the pain in just realizing that myself brings me to tears.

I think what finally did me in emotionally, was when I viewed the video of George, throwing the chairs of those two IDIOTS who were perched on or near his property! Give me a break -- what were these two stupid young men thinking? How non-productive WAS that? Did they honestly think that by sitting there, on or near George's property, sitting in chairs with an umbrella and videocamera, that it WOULDN'T affect George's already extremely tenuous emotional stability?

I think many folks are acting out of FEAR with their vitriolic posts and anger. I can understand the anger, really...I do! But Caylee's GONE -- she's never coming back. This family has to go on and deal with whatever is coming their way. And truthfully, whatever flaws and mistakes the Anthony's have made with Casey, and I'm sure there are many, are going to be borne out for all the world to see when all this comes tumbling down upon them.

Wouldn't it be nice if most of us could just extend a compassionate hand, a loving embrace -- a hot meal or two -- to this family? It doesn't mean you CONDONE their behavior -- but wouldn't it be lovely if the judgment could just STOP FOR A MOMENT and show this family some semblance of love and compassion for all the obvious pain they are suffering?

I would hope that as a human race, we can and will, learn to forgive and extend ourselves in a more compassionate and loving way to those that need it most. It's really easy to love others when they're at THEIR BEST -- it's damn difficult to love someone when all you want to do is wring their necks.

Okay, I'm off my soapbox for now...

 

[LI_Mom]

I'm not going to sit here and offer compassion for them -- when they are ENABLING their daughter.

Tim Miller for TES is in their house trying to trying to coordinate a search for their missing granddaughter -- and what is Casey doing? SHE'S ON THE FREAKING COMPUTER.

If that was my mom - -she would have dragged me out by the hair, sat my *advertiser censored* down and told me to start talking.

If that was MY mom & dad.... LE might be searching for TWO DEAD BODIES.... the granddaughter AND the daughter. lol


And Cindy's repsonse is, they haven't even talked about it since Casey got home. That tells you right away that the priority is NOT finding Caylee.... it's protecting Casey.

But no big deal..... it's the fault of LE, the media & the public that Caylee has not been found.

See, the Anthony's are all just bystanders in the whole thing..... and whatever happens or doesn't happen is beyond their control. They don't ACT..... they REACT.

And play the victim like Shakespearean actors.

 

[SUR]

Hi JBean/All,

I am SO glad to see this thread! I was beginning to think that I was but a few of those who genuinely grieve for this family. I am heartened there IS some compassion out there for Cindy, George and yes, as difficult as it may seem, Casey.

I am not a religious person per se, but I do believe in not judging others, as hard as that may be for we humans, to do. I think most of the anger I've been reading re: this case (both here at Websleuths and the 'other' forum ), emanates from our inability to UNDERSTAND the raw emotions we are viewing in this family. Plus, as hard as this may be to admit, I really do believe that many of us have what may be termed a 'mirror projection' as to what's been playing out here. Some of us realize we may be just one step shy of being in this family's shoes as well, and that's really a frightening thought.

How many of us live in perfect families? I didn't. We didn't have this type of dysfunction, but we had our moments! Do you know what I SEE when I see Cindy and George? I see two deeply flawed human beings, but human beings who raised a daughter they loved. How many of us wouldn't weep if we were to view Cindy's birth photos of Casey and viewed their many and I'm sure, cherished, photos of their daughter and videos -- SHE'S THEIR DAUGHTER. I'm sure they love her very much.

Given that, can you just for one moment understand how bitterly painful this must be for them?! Just put yourselves in their shoes -- and then add to that horrific pain -- the finality -- the fact that they know deep down inside, this beautiful creature they brought into this world and loved deeply, is the monster who killed their precious granddaughter? OMG...the pain in just realizing that myself brings me to tears.

I think what finally did me in emotionally, was when I viewed the video of George, throwing the chairs of those two IDIOTS who were perched on or near his property! Give me a break -- what were these two stupid young men thinking? How non-productive WAS that? Did they honestly think that by sitting there, on or near George's property, sitting in chairs with an umbrella and videocamera, that it WOULDN'T affect George's already extremely tenuous emotional stability?

I think many folks are acting out of FEAR with their vitriolic posts and anger. I can understand the anger, really...I do! But Caylee's GONE -- she's never coming back. This family has to go on and deal with whatever is coming their way. And truthfully, whatever flaws and mistakes the Anthony's have made with Casey, and I'm sure there are many, are going to be borne out for all the world to see when all this comes tumbling down upon them.

Wouldn't it be nice if most of us could just extend a compassionate hand, a loving embrace -- a hot meal or two -- to this family? It doesn't mean you CONDONE their behavior -- but wouldn't it be lovely if the judgment could just STOP FOR A MOMENT and show this family some semblance of love and compassion for all the obvious pain they are suffering?

I would hope that as a human race, we can and will, learn to forgive and extend ourselves in a more compassionate and loving way to those that need it most. It's really easy to love others when they're at THEIR BEST -- it's damn difficult to love someone when all you want to do is wring their necks.

Okay, I'm off my soapbox for now...

This is a terriffic post and you sound like a truly compassionate person. Thank you so much for giving me hope that there are still people in this world who truly feel and try to understand others in pain and are able to state it so eloquently.

 

[Tori2]

Try to have some compassion for Cindy & George. I'm going to bare my soul here. I have a 39 year old son who lies constantly, is a scammer, a drug addict and an alcoholic, and God knows what else. For years I believed everything he said and defended him. Finally one day I woke up. I severed contact with him a few years ago, but I still worry about him. He's on his third marriage and I've never seen his most recent child. As far as I know, he wouldn't physically hurt his kids, thank God. I don't know how he turned out that way. His sister is the complete opposite and they were raised the same way. It boggles my mind, and hurts my heart. I even moved out of Florida to another state and he has no idea. So, please, don't judge Cindy and George too harshly. They are hurting now, too. They want Caylee back as much as anyone, probably more than anyone.

Gram,
I too am so sorry for what you've been through. I hope you find peace with the situation someday. It's hard to say what causes these things as many factors play into things. Just know that you did the best you could with what you knew at the time. That's all you can require of yourself. I totally agree with you. I see so much pain in both Cindy and George. I can't even imagine what they are going through - and then to have all those people in front of their house! It must be hell, and that's not the worst of it. They've probably lost a grandchild and also a daughter. It's tragic. Welcome, and thanks for having the courage to say what you said.
Tori2:beats:

 

[manatee]

I remember a time in my life when someone I loved dearly died unexpectely and I was in a frenzy cying and screaming hysterically. a boyfriend at the time slapped me in the face and threw me on the couch and magically I stopped crying and somehow snapped out of it. I think this is what needs to happen to George and Cindy. Someone or something needs to do something to make them "snap out of it." Perhaps then they could start to truly grieve. They will never be healthy emotionally until they can do that.

 

[spydog]

Though I did defend Cindy and George on this thread, and have spoken for them and not against them, it is very frustrating to see them turn against the media and LE and make statements as Cindy did on this Morning's show that everyone should be looking for Caylee instead of pointing fingers at Caylee. I'm just not sure where she expects people to look! If Casey isn't trying herself to find her, what can she expect from everyone else?

It's so frustrating. I hope they can find Caylee soon. It's not helping with the awful weather that is coming in, and had come in during the last 2 months.

 

[Kim Ii]

We all grieve in our own time and in our own way. Grieving over someone or some 'thing' is an extremely personal issue. JMHO -- but I don't think it is up to anyone else to determine when or how, Cindy and George grieve, or when they snap out of it.

DENIAL is an extremely powerful emotion! I don't think many of us realize how very strong this emotion is, until and unless, we experience it. But it also serves a very useful purpose -- it helps us COPE when our brains just cannot wrap ourselves around the horrific emotions we are experiencing.

Our brains have a marvelous capacity to protect us from our own emotional states -- especially when those emotions can overwhelm us to the brink of the abyss. What Cindy and George are undergoing is perhaps just too horrific for most of us to fully comprehend. How many of us will actually suffer this sort of horrific act in our lifetimes? Most of us, thankfully, will NOT.

That's why, I think, it's just so hard for us to comprehend what this family is going through. We have no frame of reference, therefore, perhaps, it's easy to want to judge their behavior, words and emotions.

 

[JBean]

Hi JBean/All,

I am SO glad to see this thread! I was beginning to think that I was but a few of those who genuinely grieve for this family. I am heartened there IS some compassion out there for Cindy, George and yes, as difficult as it may seem, Casey.

I am not a religious person per se, but I do believe in not judging others, as hard as that may be for we humans, to do. I think most of the anger I've been reading re: this case (both here at Websleuths and the 'other' forum ), emanates from our inability to UNDERSTAND the raw emotions we are viewing in this family. Plus, as hard as this may be to admit, I really do believe that many of us have what may be termed a 'mirror projection' as to what's been playing out here. Some of us realize we may be just one step shy of being in this family's shoes as well, and that's really a frightening thought.

How many of us live in perfect families? I didn't. We didn't have this type of dysfunction, but we had our moments! Do you know what I SEE when I see Cindy and George? I see two deeply flawed human beings, but human beings who raised a daughter they loved. How many of us wouldn't weep if we were to view Cindy's birth photos of Casey and viewed their many and I'm sure, cherished, photos of their daughter and videos -- SHE'S THEIR DAUGHTER. I'm sure they love her very much.

Given that, can you just for one moment understand how bitterly painful this must be for them?! Just put yourselves in their shoes -- and then add to that horrific pain -- the finality -- the fact that they know deep down inside, this beautiful creature they brought into this world and loved deeply, is the monster who killed their precious granddaughter? OMG...the pain in just realizing that myself brings me to tears.

I think what finally did me in emotionally, was when I viewed the video of George, throwing the chairs of those two IDIOTS who were perched on or near his property! Give me a break -- what were these two stupid young men thinking? How non-productive WAS that? Did they honestly think that by sitting there, on or near George's property, sitting in chairs with an umbrella and videocamera, that it WOULDN'T affect George's already extremely tenuous emotional stability?

I think many folks are acting out of FEAR with their vitriolic posts and anger. I can understand the anger, really...I do! But Caylee's GONE -- she's never coming back. This family has to go on and deal with whatever is coming their way. And truthfully, whatever flaws and mistakes the Anthony's have made with Casey, and I'm sure there are many, are going to be borne out for all the world to see when all this comes tumbling down upon them.

Wouldn't it be nice if most of us could just extend a compassionate hand, a loving embrace -- a hot meal or two -- to this family? It doesn't mean you CONDONE their behavior -- but wouldn't it be lovely if the judgment could just STOP FOR A MOMENT and show this family some semblance of love and compassion for all the obvious pain they are suffering?

I would hope that as a human race, we can and will, learn to forgive and extend ourselves in a more compassionate and loving way to those that need it most. It's really easy to love others when they're at THEIR BEST -- it's damn difficult to love someone when all you want to do is wring their necks.

Okay, I'm off my soapbox for now...

Oh Kim where have you been? Great to see you posting.

 

[JBean]

Quick story that was in our paper this week. Kim maybe you saw it.
Long story short, this man stopped to help a disabled motorist on the freeway. While on the side of the road, a drunk driver mowed him and another man over, severing this man's legs from his body.
The drunk driver was arrested and was put in jail with a bond too high for his family to meet.
The injured driver has now started a campaign to help and raise money for the families of the *arrested drunk jailed father drivers*

He knows the families of those jailed drivers now have lost one source of income, they have legal bills and general turmoil through no fault of their own. This injured man that lost his legs had once been arrested for drunk driving and he knew what chaos it created for his family.

Think about that folks. Now that is true compassion and we just don't see enough of that around.

 

[Kim Ii]

SUR,

Thank you for your beautiful response to my post. I really do appreciate that.

I have been through some extremely difficult times in my life and I, too, have found myself judging others at a time when I just did not understand what the issues were, or what emotions played a part.

I've learned and I'm still learning...but that does not diminish the fact that I truly feel the pain these people are going through and yes, as hard as I know this will be to hear for those of you struggling with your anger with Casey -- I feel enormous compassion for Casey, too.

I truly believe we are here in this lifetime to help us learn lessons not learned in the past. These lessons serve to teach ALL -- not just to those of whom these issues are happening.

We can all learn something from this very horrific ordeal!

It takes so little effort and energy to show someone love and compassion -- on the other end, it takes a good deal more energy to vent one's anger and frustration at those who are suffering the most.

A lot of times, I call this emoting of frustration and anger 'inside out anger,' anger which we show outwardly to those in pain, is simply FEAR in our own inability to comprehend the painful emotions experienced when something like this happens to someone.

That fear manifests itself when we know deep down inside these atrocities could even happen to OUR own beloved ones, too. That's enough to frighten all of us and enough to cause us to lash out when it happens to others.

 

[AutomaticAuttie]

Quick story that was in our paper this week. Kim maybe you saw it.
Long story short, this man stopped to help a disabled motorist on the freeway. While on the side of the road, a drunk driver mowed him and another man over, severing this man's legs from his body.
The drunk driver was arrested and was put in jail with a bond too high for his family to meet.
The injured driver has now started a campaign to help and raise money for the families of the *arrested drunk jailed father drivers*

He knows the families of those jailed drivers now have lost one source of income, they have legal bills and general turmoil through no fault of their own. This injured man that lost his legs had once been arrested for drunk driving and he knew what chaos it created for his family.

Think about that folks. Now that is true compassion and we just don't see enough of that around.

Thank you for sharing that story I hadn't heard about!

 

[LI_Mom]

Quick story that was in our paper this week. Kim maybe you saw it.
Long story short, this man stopped to help a disabled motorist on the freeway. While on the side of the road, a drunk driver mowed him and another man over, severing this man's legs from his body.
The drunk driver was arrested and was put in jail with a bond too high for his family to meet.
The injured driver has now started a campaign to help and raise money for the families of the *arrested drunk jailed father drivers*

He knows the families of those jailed drivers now have lost one source of income, they have legal bills and general turmoil through no fault of their own. This injured man that lost his legs had once been arrested for drunk driving and he knew what chaos it created for his family.

Think about that folks. Now that is true compassion and we just don't see enough of that around.

Beautiful story!

Compassion isn't dead.... though it's VERY rarely extended to people who have shown a clear disdain for their fellow man.

Call me crazy but I think Cindy calling people "Leechs, Parasites, And Maggots" might not have tugged on people's heartstrings & caused them to re-evaluate their already low opinions.

 

[JBean]

Beautiful story!

Compassion isn't dead.... though it's VERY rarely extended to people who have shown a clear disdain for their fellow man.

Call me crazy but I think Cindy calling people "Leechs, Parasites, And Maggots" might not have tugged on people's heartstrings & caused them to re-evaluate their already low opinions.

But don't you think the press and nosey camped out on your lawn with a webcam pointed at you 24/7 just waiting for you to pick your nose is more than any of us could handle?I would have been caught on tape saying worse than that. She is at the end of her rope and the circus down there is unforgiving and cruel imo. How much are they suppose to be able to handle?

 

[Kim Ii]

Well, Hello JBean!

How ARE you? I've been around -- mostly just lurking . I lead a busy life these days -- well, for the most part. I have my own issues I am learning to deal with -- all good, for the most part -- but still, they're overwhelming at times.

The story you've posted re: above is EXACTLY what I am speaking of!!! YES! This man obviously and marvelously so, understands the true meaning of forgiveness and compassion.

Humans have such a marvelous capacity in forgiveness to others and in showing true compassion -- at times. But one of human kind's biggest faults is somehow this inability to adjust our emotions when something horrific happens to someone else. We get all judgmental, without fully comprehending the complex emotions involved for all concerned. There are lessons for the Anthony family -- lessons for Cindy, for George, for Casey, for their family and friends, and for ALL those interested in this case.

If I lived near the Anthony family, I would hope that I would surrender my own self-serving judgment and offer my compassion -- offer this family a home-cooked meal, a prayer, an encouraging word. That doesn't mean that I'm CONDONING their behavior! But it's not my place to judge them -- they'll receive their judgment by the BIG GUY when it's their time.

If we can just get past our own FEAR when things like this happen and learn to open our hearts to those that are suffering, then humanity as a whole, will have come a long way...

 

[JBean]

Well, Hello JBean!

How ARE you? I've been around -- mostly just lurking . I lead a busy life these days -- well, for the most part. I have my own issues I am learning to deal with -- all good, for the most part -- but still, they're overwhelming at times.

The story you've posted re: above is EXACTLY what I am speaking of!!! YES! This man obviously and marvelously so, understands the true meaning of forgiveness and compassion.

Humans have such a marvelous capacity in forgiveness to others and in showing true compassion -- at times. But one of human kind's biggest faults is somehow this inability to adjust our emotions when something horrific happens to someone else. We get all judgmental, without fully comprehending the complex emotions involved for all concerned. There are lessons for the Anthony family -- lessons for Cindy, for George, for Casey, for their family and friends, and for ALL those interested in this case.

If I lived near the Anthony family, I would hope that I would surrender my own self-serving judgment and offer my compassion -- offer this family a home-cooked meal, a prayer, an encouraging word. That doesn't mean that I'm CONDONING their behavior! But it's not my place to judge them -- they'll receive their judgment by the BIG GUY when it's their time.

If we can just get past our own FEAR when things like this happen and learn to open our hearts to those that are suffering, then humanity as a whole, will have come a long way...

I totally agree with you and try as I have,I'm just not been able to say it as well as you.

I'll go back to lurking and you start posting