This is an interesting question. IMO forgiveness is very much an accomplishment that develops over time, as healing occurs and what was a profound wound eventually becomes a little less raw, a little less acutely devastating, a little less compulsively treated, picked at, or opened up again. It can't be rushed, and I'm not sure it can be achieved intentionally.
JW seems like a kind and thoughtful soul with a giving nature, but I sincerely hope she and her family unit concentrate on their own need to heal and survive this tragedy, instead of getting bound up in attempts at actively forgiving an utterly hideous and irreversible betrayal. Ignoring AW – acting as though he is estranged, even dead – may be the only way for her not to get further sucked into the malevolence and hatred he exudes toward the world at large, and very specifically toward her,her happiness, her family. He is in custody, but IMO he still poses an extreme danger to her emotional and spiritual well-being, to any hope for eventual peace of mind. She must take steps to protect herself and the remaining good in her life – her fiancé and her baby, perhaps her faith and her outlook.
I hope, for her sake, she avoids his court dates and trial. I hope he never sees her again, and can never fix that malevolent, self-satisfied glare on her. His presence is the stuff of nightmares, and he will leech away anything good in her life if she dwells on him or his needs at all.
I also hope that she, and DB, and any others who are suffering profoundly because of the actions of this self-absorbed monster, can get high-quality professional counseling and therapy for as long as they need it. Dealing in a healthy way with the belated realization that you have been the focus of so much toxic, purely destructive ill-will, on top of profound grief, seems to me beyond the capacity of most people trying to work through trauma on their own. IMO she needs every bit of emotional and spiritual support that can be found – and receiving such support, and using it to heal, is perhaps the only way for her to eventually realize moments of forgiveness.
MOO