I've done some reading on the whole SB/SD thing and I found it quite interesting as there really seems to be a negotiation of "terms" that happens.
So this got me to thinking, as it has really been bothering, me as I try to understand why a young woman would meet a man at 3:00 am in the morning, in a park, under the assumption that they had never previously met (in person).
I think that they may have had a long "negotiating" period. Texts/emails back and forth over a period of time. Among those communications would have been info about AA, info about ML, likes, dislikes, what the arrangement would be, etc. etc. After so much going back and forth and starting to "think" you know the other person at the other end of the text, a familiarity is born.
I can see texting back and forth, getting to know someone, sharing information and it's been ongoing for a while. Even though you haven't met, a bond has started to form.
The opportunity arrives to meet and unfortunately, ML has to leave to go home to attend her Grandmother's funeral. They stay in touch. They make arrangements. They both really want to meet each other. She's excited to meet AA. She thinks he's a good guy. Her gut didn't tell her differently. He hit all the sweet spots. He could have made her feel comfortable with him.
So while he's working his charms on her, she's liking this more and more - who wouldn't?
He's being charming. He's sad about her grandmother passing and hooks her. Let's get together. ML might even have been the one to suggest it. Whatever, one person or both of them decided that tonight was the night.
It all would have been fine except for the fact he wasn't who he said he was, and as soon as she got in that car, it all went bad.
I am beginning to think that they had never met before in person but a protracted period of texting, emailing, photo sharing etc., made ML feel comfortable and felt she "knew" him. That's why she was happy to see him (per the Lyft driver) when they arrived at the park. There was an excitement to the first meeting.
She just didn't know in time that she'd been had and that the guy behind the texts was a monster. And when she did realize it, it was too late.
I could be way off base, but this just dropped on me today and it was an Aha moment.
MOO