I actually detest how much emphasis the media is focusing on the fact that IL and JC met on an online dating site. The ugly truth is that being female is the biggest risk factor in dating in regards to domestic violence and other forms of assaults, and whether you met someone online, at work, through friends, or at church is just a tiny speck of a risk factor by comparison. Another ugly truth is that about 4% of the population are conscienceless sociopaths who lack empathy and feelings for humans and animals. The vast majority of these people easily pass background checks and, yes, these people may include your neighbors, your co-workers, some people at your church, and maybe even some of your friends that you have known for years (or you thought that you really knew them). I have worked with some people over the years that I would suspect as being sociopaths. As for people with phony profiles on online dating sites, both men and women often lie about their age, profession, location, height, weight, whether they are married/attached, they post photos that are from 10 years ago, etc, etc. Requiring that online dating sites perform background checks on all their members would prevent someone from posting a phony age and catch people with previous criminal records, but various other forms of deception would not be caught. If you had met Ted Bundy either on an online dating site or at a party and you started dating him, he would pass a background check because he did not have a record prior to his killing spree.
The good side of online dating is that it has enabled thousands of couples to meet and have happy relationships, and many of these people would have otherwise found it very difficult to meet single people to date for various reasons. The bad sides of online dating are not much worse than if you had met that person at a party, at a bar, or at work. I have a friend who dated her ex-husband for six years before they got married; they both met at the same law school during college. It was not until several years into her marriage that she realized her ex-husband had a severe drinking problem. Yes, he was that good at keeping it a secret. 15 to 20 years ago, people looked at you funny if you said that you found your partner online (or if you placed a personal ad in your local newspaper). But it is totally socially accepted nowadays. If you do it correctly, take it slow, trust your instincts, and do not blind yourself to red flags as the relationship progresses, online dating is actually safer than going to bars to look for a partner, and it gives many people better options than what they may find at work, church, or through friends.
