‘Mother hen’ to media villain: The life of Debbie Bradley - Kansas City Star 11/5/11

[Dr.Fessel]

Probably not in a straight line

Yeah, I keep seeing stumbling, tottering, teetering, reeling, lurching, lolling, instead of running.:waitasec:

 

[gluestk]

Well, my inner cynic says basic economics - as in circulation and ratings - would dictate that local media would be foolish to not cover anything related to what must be one of the biggest local new stories they have right now...and maybe they think emphasising the positive aspects in the article might encourage the parents to trust them and let them 'in' a little more. JMO.

I bet your inner cynic is right. Local small news stations ---all the way up to national news and big cable stations want huge numbers during ratings week. (monthy)

 

[tehcloser]

“She would have picked that baby up and run up and down the street screaming for help,” he said of his daughter.

Read more: http://www.kansascity.com/2011/11/0...lain.html#.TrYDcX3KlkE.facebook#ixzz1d3Az8qzN

Can she run drunk? I don't know.

In an effort to further this discussion.......from personal experience, I say no. She could not run drunk. It's more like this crabcrawlfroghoppy thing you do when in that state.

And no.........I will not post it on youtube. :floorlaugh:

 

[gluestk]

I actually took uncooperative to mean both. The parents won't be interviewed separately, and they aren't answering the questions that LE would like answered.

That's how I took it Tuffy.

 

[gluestk]

Why is being a step mother a tangled web?

That's not what she meant. :innocent: IMO

 

[21merc7]

In an effort to further this discussion.......from personal experience, I say no. She could not run drunk. It's more like this crabcrawlfroghoppy thing you do when in that state.

Ummm, errrr, have been known to run very well (quite fast too, faster than normal), even in high heels, while inebriated. Just sayin'. :crazy:

 

[tehcloser]

Ummm, errrr, have been known to run very well (quite fast too, faster than normal), even in high heels, while inebriated. Just sayin'. :crazy:

How interesting!!!!!!!!! Looks like we have the beginnings of a "study" going on here............:floorlaugh:

 

[gluestk]

Better late then never...:waitasec:

Is there an article that says the grandparents didn't searchfor Lisa?

 

[stilettos]

In an effort to further this discussion.......from personal experience, I say no. She could not run drunk. It's more like this crabcrawlfroghoppy thing you do when in that state.

And no.........I will not post it on youtube. :floorlaugh:

I love you teh...but I have been known to run drunk in five and a half inch heels. Wobbly, but running. :crazy:

 

[Dr.Fessel]

Ummm, errrr, have been known to run very well (quite fast too, faster than normal), even in high heels, while inebriated. Just sayin'. :crazy:

I can sit on a bench perfectly normal after having a few or 5 or 10.:seeya:

 

[gluestk]

Yes, he has. He does. He continued to look even this past weekend. There was a search involving the grandparents at 53rd Street.




What's wrong with a family to want to humanize the mother of a missing baby girl? Especially amid a climate where that mother has been vilified, pilloried and accused of killing her daughter and paying someone to hide the body.




Respectfully, this is not true.

-----------------people may be reacting to this woman's
own actions
inactions
her own words

 

[gluestk]

A jury would be presented with much more evidence than we've gotten so far. Just saying.

Link?
WE don't know what evidence LE has...........period.

 

[tehcloser]

Well....possibly teh is just clumsy. kay:

 

[21merc7]

Well....possibly teh is just clumsy. kay:

Hey, Dr. F doesn't even try. Just sitting on the bench, like he always does. :floorlaugh: At least you tried!

Secretly wondering if Dr. F gets paid to sit on bench all the time...

ETA: To be fair I was referring to a time 20 years or so ago, can't even try it now.

 

[pwilly]

This quote still cracks me up. It is so delusional.

“My God, Debbie and Jeremy can’t even relax and smoke on the back porch without seeing hidden cameras popping out of brush. It’s horrible.”

Read more: http://www.kansascity.com/2011/11/0...lain.html#.TrYDcX3KlkE.facebook#ixzz1d39GInrz

Who thinks about relaxing when your baby is missing?

Those dang cameras keep reminding me of Lisa when I am just trying to relax.

I really wonder too if they are seeing real cameras or is it in their heads?

 

[neese]

ITA! I was trying to convey this in my post a couple of pages back, but you did a much better job at explaining what I was thinking! LOL!

IMO - people that are only concerned with themselves, at the expense of others (even people they are supposed to be responsible for i.e. their kids) are VERY good at seeking out the next enabler/caregiver. They are just like womanizers, addicts (which could obviously be at play here as well), con artists, etc. IMO, and can spot a target a mile away.

***Again, everything below is simply my opinion, based on my personal life experiences and my own perception of the relationship between DB and JI. Not saying that it's really like this for DB and the people in her life, but that is what I'm picking up on in my observations of them. I am not a professional at detecting personality or mental disorders, so please take this as MHOO and with a grain of salt! ***

In my personal experience, it seems the usual target is someone who tends give people the benefit of the doubt, only sees the good and ignores the bad, etc. They tend to feel empathy for her (example: bad childhood, bad breakup, abusive ex, single mom, less than ideal life in general) and want to "rescue" her or in the case of a parental figure, "take her under their wing". She is usually very good at honing in on the target's emotional triggers, playing on their need to be a hero or rescuer or mother they didn't get to have.

It's hard to really understand the dynamic unless you experience it first hand, and I'm probably doing a terrible job at explaining it. But I do believe it takes two to tango in this scenario. The self-serving ones that seek out caretakers/rescuers aren't very successful without the other half of the equation. There has to be that one person or people that can only see the good and none of the bad. Or if they see the bad, it's easily explained away by the negative past experiences she had - before they came into her life of course. And she will play into that by being a victim - of her past, of society, of whatever - as long as the two roles are balanced in this way, it doesn't matter what is fact or fiction.

People only see what they are prepared to see.

As I said, I've seen this firsthand and it's very bizarre. The rescuer will defend and protect the self-server regardless of fact, logic, or reason.

In fact, it may then turn into a situation where the rescuer feels as though no one has ever stood up for her before, and this is a time that she NEEDS someone to be by her side for once. So regardless of what they believe or know, all that matters is that they continue to defend her and stand by her - to prove to her AND to themselves that they are exactly what they promised her they'd be. It's one of those strange relationship dynamics where one doesn't work without the other - at least to some degree. As long as there is someone looking to be taken care of, there will always be someone, somewhere who wants to be the caretaker.

And in this case, I believe you are right about there being a long string of people that have taken care of her, and when that situation no longer suited her needs, she moved on to the next willing person.

In my post a couple of pages back, I had mentioned that perhaps she felt she was out of options at the moment, but the stress and pressure of daily life with JI was becoming too much to deal with. And almost like a compulsion, it became a need to change the situation into something more conducive to her self-serving goals. And if she felt she had no one else to take her in, it would make sense for her to attempt to regain control over her situation by whatever means necessary.

And since she appears to have her own self-interest in mind, wanting to party or have more adult time, what would be the the first thing to go?

***Once again, this is MHO and nothing more.***

I'm not entirely certain of what has transpired with this family, and my perceptions could easily be way off base. So please understand I am just throwing this in there for discussion purposes only, and not necessarily as an accusation of guilt.

And even if all of the above were spot on, BL could have still been abducted in the middle of the night by a stranger - making this whole scenario a moot point in regards to their child being missing. Having said that, I hope I covered all the bases for everyone - regardless of which side of the fence you're on.

Thanks for reading!

Wow, this was an excellent post. Actually I was NOT even thinking about the BL case while I was reading. I was applying this to real life situations that I see all the time. Sometimes I have just scratched my head, :waitasec: trying to figure out what in the world the dynamic is of so and so's relationship. I see the rescuer ALL the time and it seems like the person they are trying to rescue, actually pulls the rescuer down to their level, rather than the rescuee getting better. Then it's just a vicious cycle. I've seen this a lot in wondering how some marriages or couples stay together and how odd it is to see one person being so functional and the other so dysfunctional, but it's the rescuer/enabler who is putting up with it and keeping the cycle going. Wow thanks for this. Excellent read. :aktion:

 

[BetteDavisEyes]

Yeah, I keep seeing stumbling, tottering, teetering, reeling, lurching, lolling, instead of running.:waitasec:

Bumbling, meandering, tumbling, wobbling, and possibly stopping...to puke

 

[gluestk]

I would really like to believe that DB had no part in Lisa's disappearance. But there are so many things that leave huge doubts. The biggest thing for me is not allowing the boys to be re-interviewed and not submitting DNA samples. These are 2 very simple things that could help rule her out and allow the police to perhaps move on in this case. But they are just adamantly against this, it seems. It baffles me. I guess I compare these actions to what I would be willing to do to find my baby. That would be anything. DB's willingness to find her child seems limited, imo.

IMO when one or two things cause doubt, I can sit on the fence comfortably. When those one or two doubt filled comments or actions turn into a whole lot more, I fall off the fence.

bbm

 

[menmo]

Just FYI - I have a valid driver's license & a big fat Cadi fully insured but I don't drive. I have people to chauffeur me - my choice.

I also have friends who have no valid license -- either through their own stupidity or by choice -- who know how to drive & either do or don't.

I guess my question is: does it matter if DB drives or not? And why is this important?

Mother Hen: a person who assumes an overly protective maternal attitude
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mother hen

or in Sarah Palin's world "Mama Bear"

I'm sorry for the late reply as I'm just catching up.

The point of her driving, for me, is significant to the fact of if she's been convicted of DWI or DUI, one or more times.
Of course it could be something as she doesn't want to drive, like my sister, and just likes people taking her places.
Or it could be as another poster suggested and have to do with having let insurance laps, or even to many tickets.
Yes, to me it matters because it's one more puzzle piece to put the whole puzzle together.

I wish someone, news wise, or other, would research this and tell us. If I lived closer I would do it myself, if it wasn't sealed.

JMO

 

[Dr.Fessel]

Hey, Dr. F doesn't even try. Just sitting on the bench, like he always does. :floorlaugh: At least you tried!

Secretly wondering if Dr. F gets paid to sit on bench all the time...

Only what people drop into my drool cup, wait I mean thank you cup.:crazy: