2010.06.28 - Kyron's Dad files for divorce and restraining order

[believe09]

Actually, I had that in my first post that the only part of the order that pertains to the baby is the part above. But no where in that part that says what Teri is prohibited from doing to minor child in petitioner's custody does it state anything about no contact..

"Intimidating, molesting, interfering with or menacing" do not mean no contact.

So how does the RO clearly say Teri is to have no contact.

I am certain this has been answered, but the part BBM is going to be tough to enforce if she is in front of this child.

 

[believe09]

Do you really believe that child has lost all memory of her mother?

I know this is not directed at me, but yes I suspect she has begun to forget her. Shortly she will have been apart from her mother for 1/3 of her life. That is a lot for a little one.

 

[human]

As an adult, the last thing I would want is to have to deal with an abusive person.

I think it's best that children learn that it is not their fault that an abuser is abusive to them.

The sooner , the better. And sever the relationship. Who needs it?

I know as adults, we try to eliminate toxic people in our lives. Why should children who have far fewer coping skills have to deal with that horror?

Just because someone gave birth does not mean that she owns the child. A child is not a possession.

 

[germaine]

I know this is not directed at me, but yes I suspect she has begun to forget her. Shortly she will have been apart from her mother for 1/3 of her life. That is a lot for a little one.

While growing up without a mother is so sad for anyone in the long run, I was thinking the same thing. I couldn't find much on the topic in this specific context because most of the articles and studies are about object permanence in general, or about parents who are not totally absent but just sharing custody. I did find this though:

http://extension.missouri.edu/publications/DisplayPub.aspx?P=GH6607

bbm~

Older infants and divorce (8 months to 18 months)

Sometimes parents of an infant divorce and one parent drops out of the child's life. Sometimes parents of an infant divorce and one parent drops out of the child's life. If this happens, your child won't remember the other parent, but will probably become curious about the other parent. Provide short, simple, honest answers to your child's questions, such as "Your dad or mom and I couldn't get along, so he or she went to live somewhere else." Avoid saying negative things about the other parent, but reassure your child that the other parent's absence is not your child's fault. For example, you might say, "I don't know why your mom or dad is not around, but I know it has nothing to do with you. " Reassure your child that you will always love and take care of him or her. Help your child form close relationships with other adults who can be role models and provide support.

I think that's probably true and it's consistent with my experience. jmoo

 

[Adrienne37]

Baby K should have absolutely no contact whatsoever with TH until such a time that TH has been 100% cleared by LE as having nothing to do with Kyron's disappearance. JMO but I believe it is extremely detrimental to baby K's safety and welfare. In addition, Kaine should not have to be put into a position that he has to allow HIS baby to see TH much less have to pay someone to supervise them. That would be one of the cruelest things that could happen. Here is a man who has lost his son to this woman and now he has to let his baby go with her, absolutely not IMO.

 

[Billylee]

As an adult, the last thing I would want is to have to deal with an abusive person.

I think it's best that children learn that it is not their fault that an abuser is abusive to them.

The sooner , the better. And sever the relationship. Who needs it?

I know as adults, we try to eliminate toxic people in our lives. Why should children who have far fewer coping skills have to deal with that horror?

Just because someone gave birth does not mean that she owns the child. A child is not a possession.

If you are speaking generally, I would agree with you. But in this case, there is absolutely no one, not even KH saying that Terri abused any of her children, not BabyK, not J and not even Kyron.

So if this thread is still about whether or not TH should be given the right to visit with her child, then I don't see how what your saying has anything to do with it, not at this point anyway.

 

[Calliope]

I know this is not directed at me, but yes I suspect she has begun to forget her. Shortly she will have been apart from her mother for 1/3 of her life. That is a lot for a little one.

Many here and elsewhere have stated that baby misses her brother. Doesn't it stand to reason that if she so badly misses Kyron, she miss the one person who was with her nearly 24/7 for her entire life?

I don't think she's forgotten Kyron, and she certainly hasn't forgotten her mother. These people are her life, and have been imprinted upon her from birth.

 

[stmarysmead]

If you are speaking generally, I would agree with you. But in this case, there is absolutely no one, not even KH saying that Terri abused any of her children, not BabyK, not J and not even Kyron.

So if this thread is still about whether or not TH should be given the right to visit with her child, then I don't see how what your saying has anything to do with it, not at this point anyway.

And IF we were speaking generally about any ole woman... I would agree with YOU.

However we are speaking of Teri Horman, the woman whose attorney says is the de facto suspect in the disappearance of her step-son, the woman whose husband was informed by LE that she tried to have him murdered, the woman who has been "sexting" to amuse herself and did something similar with the Yard Guy she wanted to off her husband.

And the woman who will not or can not testify to clear up any of the above, because her attorney says she will "incriminate" herself. Risk Baby K's physical or emotional safety under those conditions?

No. The question of "child abuse" pales with the extent of the evil that surrounds Terri Horman.

 

[stmarysmead]

Many here and elsewhere have stated that baby misses her brother. Doesn't it stand to reason that if she so badly misses Kyron, she miss the one person who was with her nearly 24/7 for her entire life?

I don't think she's forgotten Kyron, and she certainly hasn't forgotten her mother. These people are her life, and have been imprinted upon her from birth.

BBM I believe these are sentiments we impose as adults on a not yet two year old.

Her brother has been missing since June. Her Mother...who may have just been a figure seated at a computer or one...contorting herself with her "cell phone body part portraits" ....has been absent for four months. You can't look at Facebook pictures and assume they tell the whole story. If you could, Casey Anthony would be nominated for Young Mom of the Year.

We have some idea of the morals of this Mother...but we have no idea how that seeped into other facets of Baby K's every day life..if her predilections caused Baby K to be neglected and distressed while Mommy amused herself with Landscapers and cell phones.

Baby K may feel more secure now than she ever has.

She has a happy secure environment with a wonderful loving Dad. That's the only safe place for her now.

 

[germaine]

BBM I believe these are sentiments we impose as adults on a not yet two year old.

sbm~

Also, my guess is that they're referring to her missing kyron because she is reminded of him. Hearing him talked about, seeing his photos, his room, etc. All of those things would keep him a constant in her life that would be *missed* in the way a 2 year old can miss someone. I'm guessing noone is talking about terri with baby unless baby mentions her, which maybe she does, or maybe doesn't. She's it too young, imo, to keep an active memory alive on her own without reinforcement. jmoo

 

[Chablis]

Hopefully by the time the courtdate comes up for visitation, she will have been arrested and sent to jail. If she did something to Kyron, she should not be around children period, supervised or not. Didn't they say that the baby is a whole different kid now? Why come back in her life when there is a chance you could end up in jail? That is selfish. If shes so innocent and didn't do anything to Kyron, she needs to work at proving that, and then get back in her childs life.

jmo

 

[believe09]

Many here and elsewhere have stated that baby misses her brother. Doesn't it stand to reason that if she so badly misses Kyron, she miss the one person who was with her nearly 24/7 for her entire life?

I don't think she's forgotten Kyron, and she certainly hasn't forgotten her mother. These people are her life, and have been imprinted upon her from birth.

I get what you are saying, I just disagree that it will last long. I am sure intitially she asked for her mother and for Kyron. But as long as she has adequate love and care, the memories are going to fade. At least at her age, they are very likely too.

I am not advocating for it-I am simply saying I am sceptical that a baby will remember someone who has not been in her life for almost a third of it.

 

[JBean]

Good gosh, the baby is 22 months old and her mother has been her primary caretaker. of course this will have impact on the baby. how can it not? Mothers are not so easily forgotten or replaced, especially at 22 months.

This is a horrible situation all the way around. If TH is guilty baby K loses, if TH is innocent baby K loses. this is a nightmare no matter how you slice it.

 

[germaine]

Good gosh, the baby is 22 months old and her mother has been her primary caretaker. of course this will have impact on the baby. how can it not? Mothers are not so easily forgotten or replaced, especially at 22 months.

This is a horrible situation all the way around. If TH is guilty baby K loses, if TH is innocent baby K loses. this is a nightmare no matter how you slice it.

as mothers, we'd like to think not. But i don't think the facts bear it out. Children that small don't remember mothers or fathers who are out of their lives for whatever reason, assuming that someone's no actively reminding them of ther other parent. and yes, the child loses all the way around. But it terri is guilty she's better off, imo. And if she isn't, I hope they can mend this down the road.

 

[eyes4crime]

as mothers, we'd like to think not. But i don't think the facts bear it out. Children that small don't remember mothers or fathers who are out of their lives for whatever reason, assuming that someone's no actively reminding them of ther other parent. and yes, the child loses all the way around. But it terri is guilty she's better off, imo. And if she isn't, I hope they can mend this down the road.

BBM

Fix it later? The damage of yanking baby girl out of mom's arms could be immeasurable, certainly not easily fixed! Why not prevent damage? Guess I'm confused by exactly what problem yanking her fixes? TIA

She counted on mom her entire short life for love, nourishment, safety, play, and learning. Mom was the one human being in baby's life that was constant 24/7.

One can't destroy the sensual memories such as touch, sound, smell, taste, sight. They will be with baby girl for a long time, maybe in the unconscious only to surface later in life.
all just my opinions and stuff like that.

 

[JBean]

as mothers, we'd like to think not. But i don't think the facts bear it out. Children that small don't remember mothers or fathers who are out of their lives for whatever reason, assuming that someone's no actively reminding them of ther other parent. and yes, the child loses all the way around. But it terri is guilty she's better off, imo. And if she isn't, I hope they can mend this down the road.

Unfortunately, I know too many young people that lost their mothers for various reasons when the children were 2 years old.I concur that over time children do lose memory of their mothers;but it is definitely not without impact.
If TH is behind this crime then she has lost her mom card imo, so hopefully the long term impact on her daughter will be for the best if they are not reunited.

 

[Michael25]

I've only taken one psych class but I didn't think memories started to form until around age 4. Facial recognition occurs early, but it has no bearing on the happiness or sadness of someone that young. They don't have the ability to judge like that.

 

[Trident]

I've only taken one psych class but I didn't think memories started to form until around age 4. Facial recognition occurs early, but it has no bearing on the happiness or sadness of someone that young. They don't have the ability to judge like that.

I remember a lot of things, complete with feelings, from my babyhood. I remember being baptised at a few months old. I remember my long-defunct father from age two. Maybe I have a better memory than most.

 

[eyes4crime]

What problem will be fixed if baby K is taken from her mommy's arms? What purpose does it serve? Terri hasn't been charged with a single thing as of yet. She is not a POI or a suspect. moo

If keeping baby K from her mommy is a punishment, who really is being punished? Babies and children should never be used for that purpose. Guess I'm at a loss as to what the reasons are for such a harsh response. What about separation anxiety? What about sensory memories? What about object constancy and trust? Just a few that came to mind. moo

Please remember that women in prison see their babies/children. More and more nurseries are being built in prisons for the very purpose of mom and child keeping in touch. moo

 

[stmarysmead]

The general public knows nothing about the quality, lack thereof, or even... perversions... of Terri Horman's mothering. For the sake of our debates, we have limited "sources": the most prominent ones are Terri's Facebook page ...and LE (through filed legal documents and the words of attorneys and the grieving parents.

On one side we have the "happy" pictures on Terri's Facebook account. I give them about the same weight in determing how "good" a Mother Terri is...as Casey Anthony's Facebook page. Facebook is essentially self-designed PR. Very few people caption under their Baby's cute photo...

"after I took this photo of Baby...I asked the Yard Guy again how much money and how many sex shots of me would it take to get my husband killed."

So Terri's Facebook...is Terri's love affair with Terri...the "perfect" Terrr she wants everyone to believe in.

We do not know what quality of care or affection Baby K received...there is a huge gap between clean and fed...and real loving parenting. We CANNOT say for sure...where Teri Horman's sense of Mothering fell using Facebook. We do know another child who loved her is missing and her attorney says SHE is the de facto suspect.

And we do know LE believes she tried to hire someone to off her husband. They told him so.

That is a HUGE character flaw...it speaks to her coldness, her disregard for life, her ability to be supremely self-involved.

Anyone who crosses her deserves NOT to live.

Into that piece of information, we insert the fact that her stepson is missing. That her attorney says she is a "de facto" suspect. That she cannot answer questions without "incriminating herself. That her sexually explicit advances to the Landscaper were "similar" to those she used in sending graphic photos of herself to a ummm "new friend."...at a time SHE KNEW she was being watched.

So what's the choice in deciding foe NOW...what is the safest place for Baby K. Use Terri's Facebook as the bases to say she can be trusted...is safe? Or use the disturbing information we have read in court documents attributed to LE, witnesses... and her own attorneys?

I vote for the latter. A woman who would solicit Murder for hire and is the de facto suspect in the disappearance of a trusting child WHO LOVED HER...should not, at this point, be near ANY baby. Not even her own.