CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #15

[jennapuppy]

K. But why :being home at dad's by 8pm is a big deal? No one ever said they had a curfew/expected @ MR home at a certain time = 8:00 pm (MT). The phone just quit working at 8:00 pm. Why the need to place DR at his dad's at that time? Explain that to me. TIA.

Thanks - I've been meaning to ask this question. We've heard 8:00 as the time of the last phone contact. Have we ever heard it said what time they arrived home or was that an assumption?

 

[Seajay]

I can't see a reason to believe this one, at this time.

It's ok. I believe.

 

[Seajay]

Thanks - I've been meaning to ask this question. We've heard 8:00 as the time of the last phone contact. Have we ever heard it said what time they arrived home or was that an assumption?

I never saw anywhere where it said they were home, I never saw anywhere where it was said they weren't home. That's been another one of those assumptions that keep cropping up, depending on what everyone wants to believe.

 

[marlywings]

KUSA - 9Wants to Know has learned the woman running a Facebook page about missing 13-year-old boy Dylan Redwine had been criticized for her involvement in another missing child case.

Kimberly Kay Bowman admitted to 9News Wednesday that she was the administrator of the Missing Dylan Redwine CMCF page. The site was later deleted.

Redwine's mother asked Bowman to remove the page saying that she wanted the community to focus on a different community Facebook page about Dylan's disappearance.

Last month, Bowman was accused of collecting money for merchandise related to the Jessica Ridgway search against the wishes of the Ridgeway family.

http://www.9news.com/news/article/304734/188/-Dylan-Redwine-Facebook-page-deleted-

 

[vasportsmom]

I do not see how it wouldn't be a crisis. But maybe that is just me.

When I make plans with my kids, especially when they were 13, and we agree upon something, then no one is allowed to just go off and leave with no note or message.

Dad said he would be back at 11 to take him to town. So didn't Dad think it odd that the kid was gone, with no explanation?

Why didnt he use the land line to call Dylans phone? Why didnt he use the landline to call his ex and see if she had heard from him?

Why didnt he call the friends earlier than 4 pm to see if he had made it there?

Dylan did not live there and did not have any friends within walking distance. So why wasn't dad more concerned about finding out where he went? People are saying that it is a safe place, but it is surrounded by water and the woods and sprinkled with RSO's. So evidently it is not as safe as all that.

He did not go to the friends house until almost 4 pm. Because he went right to Bayfield immediately afterwards, and got there about 4:15 to 4:30. So I really wonder about the 5 hour gap. But as I said, maybe it does not seem odd to others here. But it does seem odd to me. JMO

I would have went into something close to crisis mode right away. I have 12 & 17 yo boys and when they are home alone the rule is don't leave the house unless you are going out the back door and through the back yard to get to grandmom's (our yards are fenced together with a gate separating the yards) and even then you text me and let me know first. Do people really let young teens take off as they please and let hours pass with no word from them before they decide maybe they should try to locate them?


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[vasportsmom]

It's ok. I believe.

For what purpose would Dylan have a burn phone?


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[Confusion]

I would have went into something close to crisis mode right away. I have 12 & 17 yo boys and when they are home alone the rule is don't leave the house unless you are going out the back door and through the back yard to get to grandmom's (our yards are fenced together with a gate separating the yards) and even then you text me and let me know first. Do people really let young teens take off as they please and let hours pass with no word from them before they decide maybe they should try to locate them?


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Yes they do. I think that's pretty obvious just by reading many of the threads here.

 

[katydid23]

When at my mom's when I'm in the back room, I can't get cell service nor can I send a text. Nothing goes through. Not even 3G. Nothing.

I have to move around the house to find a bar for cell service which is sketchy at best and the same with texts. They will queue up and when I go out front, sometimes they will download and I will get them. But I've sat out front and text and have them not go through and it tells me to try again.

As far as Marks actions/reactions when he got home and discovered Dylan wasn't there. The kid is 13, he's not a baby. He's got a mind of his own. He could have been a number of places, there was no reason for Mark to think right away that Dylan was in danger or missing. That's not the first thing he would think of. Why should he?? His son has friends there, there is a creek out back, there is a lake down the way. There are too many things he could have been doing. So maybe he wasn't concerned to start with.

Then after a time, he texts him or tries to call him and he gets no answer or the calls don't go through. So he starts to look around to see if he can find him. It's still not an emergency situation at that point. Why should it be?

Later, he drives to his friend's in Vallecito, finds he's not there. This is probably when he starts getting concerned, because his friend didn't see him or heard from him. So he drives to Bayfield hoping against hope that Dylan found his own way there. This is when he realizes that he has an emergency situation. This is when the panic sets in, when he's not anywhere he thought he would be. JMO

And Mark may NOT have been the last to see Dylan. Someone, the person who has him was.

BBM

Why should he think there was a problem? Maybe because they had, according to dad, made planss to meet up at 11 for a ride to town. So Dylan should have been there or left a note explaining where he went.

And even 13 yr olds need to leave a note if they are going to run around alone in the woods. Adults even need to do that.

If you look at the bolded portion above, you answered your own question. WHY should dad be worried that Dylan is in danger, since there are lakes and creeks all around. That is EXACTLY why he should be worried. For all we know poor Dylan is in one of those bodies of water.

And it is not true that he had friends nearby. he had one that was too far to walk to. But that is all. So where did Dad think he went off to?

If he got a ride to his friends, wouldn't Dad expect a note, since he rushed back to pick him up?

If the reception was so spotty, why didnt dad get on the landline and find the phone number to the parents where Dylan was supposed to be heading?

 

[LJKaust]

If my texts fail to send for any reason there is an exclamation mark over the "messages" icon on my home screen and when I open up messages there is the option to cancel or resend the failed message.


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As far as I know, that exclamation only comes up if it doesn't send from your end, not if it isn't received. I don't know of any way to get a notification that your message has been read by the person you sent it to.

 

[jennapuppy]

I do not see how it wouldn't be a crisis. But maybe that is just me.

When I make plans with my kids, especially when they were 13, and we agree upon something, then no one is allowed to just go off and leave with no note or message.

Dad said he would be back at 11 to take him to town. So didn't Dad think it odd that the kid was gone, with no explanation?

Why didnt he use the land line to call Dylans phone? Why didnt he use the landline to call his ex and see if she had heard from him?

Why didnt he call the friends earlier than 4 pm to see if he had made it there?

Dylan did not live there and did not have any friends within walking distance. So why wasn't dad more concerned about finding out where he went? People are saying that it is a safe place, but it is surrounded by water and the woods and sprinkled with RSO's. So evidently it is not as safe as all that.

He did not go to the friends house until almost 4 pm. Because he went right to Bayfield immediately afterwards, and got there about 4:15 to 4:30. So I really wonder about the 5 hour gap. But as I said, maybe it does not seem odd to others here. But it does seem odd to me. JMO

For me, personally, there would be panic if I came home and my daughter wasn't there. For my husband, he would probably assume that her friend picked her up, and get on his pc and start playing COD. After a bit of that, he would try to call. Thankfully, my daughter is grown, because he probably would have reacted much the same way as MR did. He always assumes there's a reasonable explanation for things and doesn't jump to conclusions. He's so not a worrier that I have to worry double for the both of us.

 

[dlc]

Stuff on facebook, to me, are rumors until proven otherwise by a more credible source. Is this the same administrator of the facebook page that is being deleted?

I believe (IMO) that the page that is being deleted is totally separate from the "official" FB page that Katydid is referring to.

As to stuff on FB being rumor -- true, but so are most posts that are labelled IMO, or MOO, or what have you (meaning not linked to official sources) on most boards/blogs, etc.

 

[cluciano63]

For me, personally, there would be panic if I came home and my daughter wasn't there. For my husband, he would probably assume that her friend picked her up, and get on his pc and start playing COD. After a bit of that, he would try to call. Thankfully, my daughter is grown, because he probably would have reacted much the same way as MR did. He always assumes there's a reasonable explanation for things and doesn't jump to conclusions. He's so not a worrier that I have to worry double for the both of us.

But I assume your daughter lived with you and was not just there on a court-ordered visit, her very first day of such, in fact. It is not the same situation as for parents who live with their kids daily, know their habits, etc.

 

[asyousay]

IMO

It is strange that he had made plans to pick up Dylan at 11:30am and when he got home there is no trace of him and no note or text message from Dylan to say he had made his own way into town .

This is the same boy who the night before was polite enough to cancel his plans with his friends .

Dylan is 13 and not 5 so he would of known his dad would worry if he just left without saying a word when they had already made plans .

 

[aust amateur slueth]

K. But why :being home at dad's by 8pm is a big deal?

I would like to know this, too.

it's not necessarily a big deal, it was just that we've heard that Dylan went to sleep soon after they arrived at MRs home, so was running the thought of maybe it didn't ping because there was no service there.

it seems more likely to have little or no service there than closer to durango.


trying to work out the possible general location of that last ping around 8pm could be useful

 

[vasportsmom]

As far as I know, that exclamation only comes up if it doesn't send from your end, not if it isn't received. I don't know of any way to get a notification that your message has been read by the person you sent it to.

If my 13yo isn't where he is supposed to be (home waiting on me) and he isn't responding to my attempts to locate him then I am going to step up my efforts and try another mode of contact. I'm not going to wait hours to do it either.


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[katydid23]

I would have went into something close to crisis mode right away. I have 12 & 17 yo boys and when they are home alone the rule is don't leave the house unless you are going out the back door and through the back yard to get to grandmom's (our yards are fenced together with a gate separating the yards) and even then you text me and let me know first. Do people really let young teens take off as they please and let hours pass with no word from them before they decide maybe they should try to locate them?


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I think that is one of the stumbling blocks here. Some here find it hinky that dad wasn't more concerned. Others find it believable and see no reason for him to be worried when he returned to an empty house. I guess it just depends upon the rules you set for your kids.

But if they had plans set for him to return at 11 to pick him up, I don't understand why he didn't feel worried that Dylan was not waiting.

 

[katydid23]

For me, personally, there would be panic if I came home and my daughter wasn't there. For my husband, he would probably assume that her friend picked her up, and get on his pc and start playing COD. After a bit of that, he would try to call. Thankfully, my daughter is grown, because he probably would have reacted much the same way as MR did. He always assumes there's a reasonable explanation for things and doesn't jump to conclusions. He's so not a worrier that I have to worry double for the both of us.

But if your husband only had sporadic visitation with her, and he made plans to come home to get her , on the very first morning she was visiting, wouldnt he be a bit concerned?

 

[cluciano63]

IMO

It is strange that he had made plans to pick up Dylan at 11:30am and when he got home there is no trace of him and no note or text message from Dylan to say he had made his own way into town .

This is the same boy who the night before was polite enough to cancel his plans with his friends .

Dylan is 13 and not 5 so he would of known his dad would worry if he just left without saying a word when they had already made plans .

I think kids are often more apt to keep their friends up to date first, then maybe get around to the parents. Especially in a case like this, maybe. Dylan may have been a little hostile about this trip; I know it is not confirmed, just my opinion.

 

[Confusion]

I think that is one of the stumbling blocks here. Some here find it hinky that dad wasn't more concerned. Others find it believable and see no reason for him to be worried when he returned to an empty house. I guess it just depends upon the rules you set for your kids.

But if they had plans set for him to return at 11 to pick him up, I don't understand why he didn't feel worried that Dylan was not waiting.

It has nothing to do with me or my parenting. I'm not Dylan's parent, and I don't assume that everybody else thinks or acts like I do.

 

[katydid23]

After hashing it all out and rehashing it, I guess the bottom line for me is this. Why didnt MR immediately go to the friends house a couple of miles away, and see if Dylan had gotten a ride? No need to try and depend upon spotty cell service or wait and see if it went through. JMO