Do you think the other side of Cindy is worse than we think?

[affinity]

I don't understand why CA went *stumping* as you say. Maybe keeping quiet and not offering help to LE would sit right with others. But going on the stump and telling IN YOUR FACE lie after lie? There's no excuse for that. IMO.

Have you ever seen a spouse who doesn't believe their spouse is cheating on them? They are very invested in believing that everyone else is lying about the infidelity. That is why the expression exists: "The wife/husband is the last to know". Cindy's denial was denial on steroids.

Cindy took to the streets in a campaign and that was definitely misguided. I agree I doubt that I would have handled it that way...but I honestly don't know what I might have done. I AM someone who would want to "do something". She did what she thought she believed would help bring Caylee home. She couldn't face that her daughter would REALLY go so far. She had to believe these wacked out spy type scenarios because it was her last thread of hope. Be as mad at her as you want...it won't change a thing. She is a flawed person but she really doesn't deserve the level of vitriol that permeates the internet about her. She made grievous errors, but she has been living a nightmare of epic proportions.

 

[SoCalSleuth]

Does anyone else find it strange that not one "old friend", "new friend", co-worker or neighbor has come forward to say anything nice about CA & GA? The only one we heard from was CA's brother--and he was none to flattering.

 

[PaulaF513]

Controlling? So what? Someone had to be in control around there, the rest of them couldn't control themselves, much less run a house, a career and feed everyone. Such losers, both GA and KC. Of course she loved Caylee with every ounce of her being, but at age 50 after a long day at work, cooking, cleaning and yard work too, running after a toddler was exhausting.

It doesn't surprise me one bit that CA is in charge of everything in the house. Most women are. Who would let GA handle the money? Come on. The guy gets a disability settlement and instead of paying down some mortgage debt, he gets himself a new car. SHUT UP! Loser. A man who won't work is a loser.

So while CA has Mr. Loser flushing their house down the toilet with some internet BS, her 18 year old sociopthic daughter shows up pregnant and tells her the father is the son of an Evangelical Preacher with an odd website. I bet she was thrilled. So was GA. He didn't even meet JG until the delivery room. Huh? A little tension, you think?

But, CA stepped up to the plate and tried to roll with the punches. And I don't care if she did want KC to keep Caylee. Caylee was blood. Good grief, I can't give away a cat.

Abusive? Really? Ms. KC and her child lived in a very nice house, in a very nice neighborhood, with beautiful things, a pool, free room and board and built in babysitters. What was asked in return? Not much. Maybe get a real job or even a marketable skill and show some responsibility at age 22.

There are people standing in line to be abused like that. Millions of people don't have it that good.

CA has a temper. So what?

Is she manipulative, cunning, evil, perverse and twisted? No.

KC abused her mother and father just like she did everyone who ever crossed her path. She held Caylee like ransom and there wasn't anything they could do but suck it up. We saw what happened when they started a little tough love. She killed her ransom.

That was NOT a normal house by any means, there was a homicidal sociopath living there!

What did CA say - "Tit for Tat"? That is not a nice game to play.

This is one of the best posts I have ever seen....SHUT UP???? LAdy, you have a great way with words.

 

[sleutherontheside]

Does anyone else find it strange that not one "old friend", "new friend", co-worker or neighbor has come forward to say anything nice about CA & GA? The only one we heard from was CA's brother--and he was none to flattering.

In light of the circus that surrounds this family, and coupled with the fact that EVERY name that is even mentioned in passing is being investigated, dirt dug up, and otherwise intruded upon.....I can't imagine them wanting to put themselves through it. Any support that they are receiving, is likely from "behind the scenes". IMHO

 

[Jolynna]

Oh I hope I didn't come across as saying she was the devil. She isn't at all. Casey's choices were still her own, no matter how she was raised. I was simply trying to say that a lack of consequences, and allowing her lies to go unchallenged probably contributed to the person Casey has become. I think Cindy's heart has always been in the right place, even when her actions were not always what I would choose or agree with.

I don't agree with all of Cindy's actions and words.

But as a mother and grandmother, I empathize with her pain. I don't doubt her love for her child and grandchild in the least.

She is NOT responsible for her ADULT daughter's choices and behaviors.

IMO

 

[curiositycat]

If Cindy would have stayed as quiet as she is now, from day one, she would have been a whole lot better off and so would KC.

Cindy is a classic co-dependent, IMO, she has created her own reality with her daughter and her husband. I imagine she made them feel guilty at one moment for not working and then the next tried to make sure they depended on her. That is her "power" You can't do your "dance" alone. The dance of co-dependency takes two.

I do think she has a very dark side and that she has really poor impulse control. We have seen her switch from waving hammers one minute to hugging people compulsively the next.

I think back to her on the LKL show, the night before Caylee was found. She was her usual controlling self. One time during the interview, when GA temporarily broke down, she took her hand and lightly dug it into his arm. She has done that before with his leg during the Greta interview.

I don't blame her dysfunctional daughter on her. We all chose our own paths. KC decided to be like her father, not working much if at all and letting Cindy take care of her and her child. Others in her shoes have pulled themselves up by the bootstraps and left home and supported themselves.

Cindy may be a whole lot worse then we have seen but any adult that chose to stay with her has no one to blame but themselves in the end.

 

[Jolynna]

Agree with you Dotty.

It's good we're discussing the "other side of the coin".... if only to keep it balanced. Though I don't condone Cynthia's general behaviour or morals (good heavens, early on this woman admitted on camera that it's okay to lie) we all agree CA loved her grand-daughter.

What I'm not sure is to what degree CA's attention towards Caylee was deliberately at Casey's expense, and whether CA therefore is partly to blame for what has occurred.

Mmmm.

In response to the part I bolded...

Only CASEY is responsible for what Casey did.

It is not like Casey didn't have alternatives to living with
Cindy besides killing Caylee. Living with Caylee in a homeless shelter certainly would be better than murdering her.

IMO

 

[Jolynna]

I did feel so bad for her during that last tape release. To me it is clear that at the timeframe they know Caylee is dead. I also think Cindy believes it was an accident. Heck there are people who post here who are convinced it was an accident, I am sure Cindy wants to believe that. Casey's parents seemed to be there with the goal of getting Casey to admit to the accident and take a deal (the meeting with George, JB being away, the I hope JB is being honest with you about what you are up against). Cindy looks like she is reeling, says she is going to be sick. I think she walked in there with the anticipation of shortly hearing that Caylee was dead due to an accident and that Casey had flipped out afterwards.

That nervous breakdown may have already started. If the trial brings evidence of cruelty and intent in Caylee's death it may push her over the edge. How horrible to have the only hope you have left for family be that your daughter accidently killed your grandchild and is self imploding versus what seems to be the inevitable reality.

I think Cindy has been over the edge since shortly after this all started.

To me, it seems like she is just saying the words she thinks she needs to say and going through the motions. IMO, she lost it a long time ago.

The contrast between the pain I see in Cindy's face and posture and in Casey's smirks and eye rolls tells the story.

I believe Cindy would gladly go to jail for the rest of her life or even take the needle if it would bring Caylee back. I can't say the same for Casey. There is no question in my mind which of these two is missing and thinking of and praying for Caylee.

IMO

 

[Jolynna]

I think that what Cindy is or is not is largely irrelevant to what Casey has become.

I think Casey created Cindy, not vice versa. Living with a sociopath is the most frustrating thing you can imagine. You do try to grasp control when you can. Sometimes you do boil over--it's incredibly stressful to have to interact, day after day, with someone who totally lacks any ability to interact meaningfully with others and who does not have a shred of empathy or care.

I totally agree. Great post.

I especially like your first sentence.

 

[Jolynna]

Does anyone else find it strange that not one "old friend", "new friend", co-worker or neighbor has come forward to say anything nice about CA & GA? The only one we heard from was CA's brother--and he was none to flattering.

I don't think it matters. Many, many children have gone through worse than parents who are "unpopular".

Casey is an adult responsible for her own life and decisions. Nobody held a gun to her head and FORCED her to kill Caylee.

JMO

 

[static]

B/c I definetly do. I can't help but think she was an abusive control freak over Casey. I am not excusing Casey in any shape or form but I just notice that about Cindy. Like the fact that Casey wanted to give Caylee up for adoption and Cindy wouldn't let her do that. She was Casey's child not Cindy's so it should have been up to Casey to do what she wanted to do.

There are other things to like almost like she controled Casey to the point where she made it so SHE was the to raise Caylee. I mean the woman was Caylee's, Grandmother yet she pretty much made/insisted that Caylee call her "Mommy". Like WTF is that about?

And then the night before Caylee died Cindy grabbed Casey by the neck. I don't know I just get this bad vibe from Cindy like she is ALMOST worse than Casey is.

I believe Cindy had "had it" with all the lies and stealing. Casey talks to her mother with total disrespect and loathing, yet Cindy still talks to her without raising her voice back at her or walking away. I truly believe that when people do not have consequences set from their parents, then it is a free for all. As for the adoption issue, Casey may have changed her mind once Caylee was put in her arms, and as the responsibility of motherhood kicked in and then turning 21, whoo hoo party time! My guess is that Casey did not speak highly of Cindy to her friends to gain sympathy. A convienant excuse-this again is all my mom's fault. JMO

 

[Pink Panther]

Does anyone else find it strange that not one "old friend", "new friend", co-worker or neighbor has come forward to say anything nice about CA & GA? The only one we heard from was CA's brother--and he was none to flattering.

I did and wondered a lot about this at the beginning...Having watched the family "in action" now for several months, I no longer find it strange. It doesn't surprise me in the least anymore!

And no, I don't think it's because they would be afraid to be scrutinized by the media/public...Anyone involved would be now, but that wasn't necessarily the case at the beginning...

I now believe that this family "closed in" on itself for good reason...Something is not quite right in there. There is a lot of dysfunction/lots of problems and I don't think that it's a co-incidence that they had cut themselves off from friends and family.

MOO

 

[Pink Panther]

Sorry, a separate point, in answer to the question posed by this thread...

Yes. I do think that there is more beneath the surface and likely worse than what we've seen. Why on earth would a mother be running around telling her adult daughter's friends that she is a sociopath??? What could possibly motivate her to do so? If she had these fears and had so clearly diagnosed her problem, why wasn't she running to Family Services instead???

 

[Nosey Parker]

Do you think the other side of Cindy is worse than we think?

I can't say. I've only seen one side of Cindy and I sure don't care for it.

 

[Jolynna]

Sorry, a separate point, in answer to the question posed by this thread...

Yes. I do think that there is more beneath the surface and likely worse than what we've seen. Why on earth would a mother be running around telling her adult daughter's friends that she is a sociopath??? What could possibly motivate her to do so? If she had these fears and had so clearly diagnosed her problem, why wasn't she running to Family Services instead???

You can't have someone's child removed from their custody because you suspect they have a personality disorder...even if they have EVERY single symptom (and even if the therapist YOU talked to says the person you describe has every single symptom.

Cindy HAD to let Casey take Caylee whenever she wanted unless and until Cindy had proof of neglect or abuse. While Caylee was under Cindy's roof I am not sure that happened.

JMO

 

[MagnoliaMom]

Yes I think she has a side that is worse than what we have seen. But we will likely never know because if one of them tells about it will anyone believe anything they say?

 

[Pink Panther]

You can't have someone's child removed from their custody because you suspect they have a personality disorder...even if they have EVERY single symptom.

A psychiatrist won't even talk to or TEST a person (over the age of 18) for mental or personality disorders unless THAT person calls themselves and asks for the test.

I understand that the situation is complex and not simple to resolve...My point is, why run around telling your adult daughter's friends that your daughter is a lying, thieving sociopath without at least TRYING to reach out to an entity that can help. We have seen no record (YET) that CA ever reached out for help...She certainly seemed to have spent some time trashing her daughter to her friends. Why not trying to help her grand-daughter through formal means?

 

[Jolynna]

I understand that the situation is complex and not simple to resolve...My point is, why run around telling your adult daughter's friends that your daughter is a lying, thieving sociopath without at least TRYING to reach out to an entity that can help. We have seen no record (YET) that CA ever reached out for help...She certainly seemed to have spent some time trashing her daughter to her friends. Why not trying to help her grand-daughter through formal means?

Maybe she was desperate to find Casey and Caylee and trying to get Casey's friends to tell her where they were? Maybe she thought she needed to let the friends know the situation was not a joke. If Cindy told her therapist about Casey's stealing and lying the therapisit probably DID say Casey sounded like a sociopath. I also imagine Cindy was sick with worry and mad beyond belief.

How was she going to get Family Services to check on Caylee if she didn't have an address to where she was? Cindy didn't even know what town they were in to know the right authorities to call. She thought Casey and Caylee were in Jacksonville.

Casey LEGALLY had the right to take Caylee anywhere she wanted to take her and NOT tell Cindy where she was. Officially, she and Caylee were NOT missing. Casey was calling. IF Casey had been telling the truth and Caylee HAD been with a babysitter bringing in authorities might cause Casey to cease even CALLING...ever again.

IMO

 

[Firefly]

FWIW, we have all seen children who act out in certain ways and wondered what they would be like as adults. Most of us have speculated aloud or to ourselves opinions of what might be the worst/best case scenerio of what a certain kid might turn out to be.
We have people and long lost childhood aquaintances that we wonder to ourselves what has become of them based on how we remember them. Were our predictions true?

Cindy knew what her child was like. Whenever Casey was bad she probably told her she would end up in jail. She would be proud of her in moments when she THOUGHT things were going well in Casey's life. (Casey new this and was diligent about keeping up apperances) Then she probably reveled in the fact that he daughter was pregnant so that she could either have a second chance with this baby and do things right and/or it would have straightened out Casey and grow her up a bit.

She knew in her mind how bad things were but never called attention to it. She kept hoping beyond hope things would get better. Caylee brightened their lives up tremendously. This was a distraction from what was brewing below the surface because the mess that Casey was......it never went away.....it only got worse.

I see Cindy's face in this recent 1/14 jail videos with her hands over her mouth trying to stifle a scream because reality is setting in. I am surprised they both didn't just go for the jugular and TOUGHLOVE it and call her on all of her stupid shenannigans.
Alas, reality was hitting them at full swing at that moment and they know this child and all the predictions they of how she would turn out was sitting RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM!!!! They, especially Cindy, did not want to be thrown under this moving bus but too bad for them they already laid down in front of it.

The other side of Cindy helped create this all. Her inactions or overcontrolling style never allowed Casey to fail even just one time in life. Her realization to the truth of the matter and the tampering of evidence supports the fact that she knew her own part in all of this.

 

[Jolynna]

FWIW, we have all seen children who act out in certain ways and wondered what they would be like as adults. Most of us have speculated aloud or to ourselves opinions of what might be the worst/best case scenerio of what a certain kid might turn out to be.
We have people and long lost childhood aquaintances that we wonder to ourselves what has become of them based on how we remember them. Were our predictions true?

Respectfully snipped.

In response to what I bolded.

No.

The insane nut (he actually had a crazy look) who climbed all over furniture, swore at the teachers and smoked in kindergarten is now a multimillionaire and an elected state representative.

Really.