RichandFamous - The alleged break-in was reported this past Tuesday.
http://www.heraldtribune.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20061030/NEWS/610300578
From the outside looking in, they are a family that has broken at the seams.
The events that upended Saul and Doreen VanderWoude's family started when their granddaughter, Coralrose Fullwood, was found dead near her North Port home more than a month ago.
The 6-year-old's death put the family in the spotlight, but revelations about poor living conditions in the Fullwood home and the arrest of Dale Fullwood, Coralrose's father, on charges of possession of child











have kept it there. The twists have engrossed the public, leading the evening news and fueling speculation about the Fullwoods on Internet message boards.
But behind the closed doors of the VanderWoudes' Fort Myers home, the family has tried to focus on what is left, not what is missing.
"Our life was good prior to this," said Saul VanderWoude. "We need to ... just move on."
The VanderWoudes are now raising their four surviving grandchildren, who were placed in their custody by the state. Only two months ago, the VanderWoudes had "too much time" on their hands. Now, their days are packed.
Saul VanderWoude cooks for four more mouths and is constantly trying to keep up with the ever-accumulating pile of dirty laundry, which means doing at least two loads a day. Before, the VanderWoudes needed to use the washing machine only twice a week.
Their electric bills and water bills are higher and they consume more gas, shuttling the children to and from school, Jewish school and doctor's appointments.
They must also keep track of ongoing meetings with the Department of Children & Families, which placed the children in their home.
"They have literally turned their lives upside down and inside out to have the kids live with them," said Marci Bartoe, the VanderWoudes' youngest daughter. "They put their lives on hold."
For the retired couple in their 60s, keeping up with their grandchildren, who range in age from 4 to 12, is a challenge. Feeding and clothing them is the easy part, Saul VanderWoude said.
Providing the emotional support the children need is more difficult. Not only have their lives been upended, but they are still trying to comprehend that their sister was killed.
The court order that placed the Fullwood children with their grandparents also prohibits them from talking about details pertaining to the death of their sister. That, the VanderWoudes said, has hampered the grieving process for the entire family.
"I think they understand it, but they are confused about it," Saul VanderWoude said. "I'm confused about it."
Next week, the children will begin to see psychologists; their grandparents hope they will help them in coping with the death of their sister.
There are still light moments in their home. One night, waffles -- topped with whipped cream -- were served for dinner as a reward for good behavior.
On Thursday, while the older children were at school, Saul VanderWoude attempted to rationalize with the youngest Fullwood, who calls his grandfather "Dad."
"I'm having that," the 4-year-old said, pointing to an item on the top shelf of the refrigerator.
"What, this?" Saul VanderWoude asked.
"Yeah."
"That's half and half!" Saul VanderWoude said, laughing. "Get out of here."
Indeed, the transition from grandparent to parent has been exhausting. But the hardest thing the VanderWoudes, who have been married 43 years, have encountered is listening to the harsh criticism of their family, especially of their daughter and Coralrose's mother, Ellen-Beth Fullwood. Some message board critics have labeled her a bad mother.
And yet the VanderWoudes agree that the majority of people who have come into their lives have been good, counting each kind act as a blessing.
Since the Coralrose Fund was established, there have been both a number of contributors and critics. The fund was set up a week after her death to help the family with expenses related to the children, such as food and clothes.
Saul VanderWoude is still overwhelmed by one anonymous donation made to the memorial fund.
It was for $2.
"That $2 to some person could have been like $2,000," he said, choking up. "It really affects me. It just shows that people do care."
Despite the nice things people do for the family, Saul VanderWoude said he braces every day for something bad to happen. Whenever he thinks it can't get any worse, it does.
Dale Fullwood's arrest more than two weeks ago has put an additional strain on the family. Ellen-Beth Fullwood has since separated from her husband, said Bartoe, her sister. Meanwhile, Dale Fullwood remains in jail on $50,000 bail, and no one from the family has visited him.
Saul VanderWoude, a former police officer, steadfastly defends his son-in-law, saying everyone is innocent until proven guilty, but the arrest has brought more scrutiny and criticism of the Fullwoods. Mothers at the bus stop in the family's North Port neighborhood said they were not surprised to hear of Dale Fullwood's arrest.
The speculation, the VanderWoudes say, hurts the entire family.
"People don't understand, it's a living nightmare is what it is," said Doreen VanderWoude. "Have compassion for these kids; they are the ones who need it."
Meanwhile, the VanderWoudes say it's too painful to grieve and there are too many other things to focus on.
Saul said he has learned a lot of lessons, but one sticks out.
"I learned I wouldn't wish this on anyone."