<modsnip: quoted post was modsnipped> no child should ever have to live through an kidnapping/abduction, and no parent should go through such a traumatic event.
I don't know if the Mom knows more or not. She's young, very young, to have a child that age. I think for her, where she doesn't appear to have custody of her two oldest children, it's more like a babysitting situation than it is mothering. She may mean well, but her maturity I think really speaks for itself in this awful situation. She could be innocent and truly be clueless. She's probably also tired a lot- pregnant with her third child in 5-6 years time, and she's only 19 herself- just a kid still in many ways herself.
Myself personally, I was like you as a mother, but even when I was on top of my children, two of my daughters were little Houdinis on separate occasions. One time, I was just tying my son's laces on his sneakers, and my oldest daughter, 3 years old, was gone when I looked up- and she was standing next to me just as I started tying his first sneaker! Kids can disappear so fast- even the most cautious mother in the world has a hair raising story or two of their children quietly sneaking away.