This is based on the review of the Tac Sac Motel by JVDS [but not really] that can be found at this link previously found and posted at WS:
http://www.tripadvisor.com/ShowUser...8753-Hotel_Tac_Sac-Lima.html#CHECK_RATES_CONT
Review of Castro Castro Accomodations by Joran Van Der Sloot, 6/17/10
As relayed to our correspondent in America, Bobarino
· My ratings for “Hotel” Castro Castro
o Value: “Such a deal. I got in for free! I might just never leave!”
o Meals: “I eat what the very top people here eat. And no extra charge to me! Didn’t get food poisoning, or Giardia or ameobiasis, yet! I can’t say that for other places I’ve been to!”
o Rooms: “Hey I got a private Room! You can’t beat that!
o Location: Center of Hell, er… I mean Lima,
o Cleanliness: “Moma told me I might need to learn how to take care of my room one day. I shoulda listened.”
o Service: “Hey, I haven’t been raped yet.”
o Sleep Quality: “Hey, I haven’t been raped yet.”
o Do you plan to return: “First I gotta get out of here.”
o Would you recommend this place to a friend: “Hey, I haven’t been raped yet. And you can play cards with some very interesting people that I have a lot in common with. So yeah, why not.”
o SPECIAL NOTE: In the event of my demise here, change my recommendation to a no! And donate my remains to science. No, I was only kidding. Can I get money for them? Oh I’d be dead, oh just contact my Mama.
o Did I do it? How much have you got? Oh, that’s right I’m dead now… [Silence]