Perhaps it gets bandied about too often, but cognitive dissonance explains so much for me, particularly where criminals still manage to have family support.
Imagine spending HOURS on the phone with your adult son who did, in fact, murder four young people, and foregoing the deep questions like why? why would you do that? Didn't you care about them? or their families? or our family? didn't you care about being caught? what happened to studying criminals, getting your PhD? did you care about nothing? did you care about no one?
And instead having to think of topical things to talk about. Instead having to engage with him while he talks about topical things. While he talks about how inconvenienced he is, how uncomfortable he is, how perturbed he is when he doesn't get his allotted biscuit.
He can destroy four lives and sentence their families to life forever without them, and he's completely unmoved by that, but short him a breadstick, and see him rage.
I'm going to guess that his family has been used to speaking this language for a long time. Talk around the elephant.
Me, that's time I'd take back. Remember and mourn the baby and toddler he one was, let him wallow in his self-serving complaints, and reclaim that time to spend with the rest of my family, the ones who don't kill people.
I'll care about your dinner roll, Bryem, right after you start caring about people.
Marking that down on my calender. Another second Tuesday of Never.
JMO