Ok, I'm just going to type. It's the middle of the night and there's nobody here, so yeah. My depression is really getting the best of me lately. I'd thought I was doing better with my promotion and working a 2nd job, taking on a LOT of new responsibility and meeting new people. My finances are finally back in check, (or very close!). I'm just really in a funk. I have been for awhile. It's my age and relationship status, and lack of kids status haha. I just pictured myself so much further along than I am now. There are some nights I just want to throw in the towel but then I think about my family and I couldn't do that to them. Ugh. So conflicted.
And yes, I'm on the max of my Citalopram, 40mgs. (generic of Celexa) Just really bummed lately and can't shake it. I hate this feeling.
Kind of just over it all
Honestly. I'm sick of the petty whining,
time to just do or die, right?
BBM Why M.
You just stop talking like this and get yourself to a psychologist or a minister/priest- if you can't afford a psychologist- right away!!! Life is tough and isn't easy for anyone of us. You are so young and have so much of life to live. This is just the way it is. Just because your life isn't the way you expected at this time is nothing- nothing! Life is a gift. You don't have any physical disabilities, you're a beautiful woman- not ugly and seem like a nice one, too. I would be proud to have you for my daughter (I don't have any daughters-only sons). You should wake up every day and be excited for what the day will bring- whatever that will be (mundane or not).
I'm an old woman- who also didn't expect to be at this point in my life, the way it is now. Alone, without my husband and struggling, but you are young! So much of life to experience and life is good, beautiful, in fact. I get up everyday with the expectations that another day has started for me to love life- whatever that would be. So many miracles in the day-little one/big ones- when I feed the birds ( they are beautiful and fly so free- miracles), chipmunks and even the little mice that visit the platform feeder, and my loving dog- who gives me unconditional love every day. Even spending time here, at WS, and talking is beautiful- with a wonderful variety of people- nice, smart, and funny.
Do we all worry- yes. Do we all have a variety of problems- yes. You need to awakening yourself to a pure state of being. This is where we accurately perceive our lives as they are today, free of regrets and distortions, wishes and hopes, or anything else that lessens our ability to accept the lives we are given. You will still have the same responsibilities today that you had yesterday, and the same challenges, but, if you stay aware of and open to
what is rather than what should or could be, you will be able to cope with daily stress, future losses, and any other difficulties that come your way. From cradle to grave, accepting where we are, no matter how hard it may be, is a challenge for all human beings.
There are some things in life that you can control and some that you can't. It's a reality of life. Life and good physical, mental, and emotional health are precious gifts to be made the very most of and cherished. They are blessings that aren't guaranteed for any length of time to anyone- they are to be appreciated, preserved, and enhanced through the choices that we make.
Why, I would give anything to be your age and have my life to do again- even if it turned out the same way! I just think of all the people who have had their life cut short- never to spend another day on earth, never to experience our wonderful, mysterious world. It makes me embrace life even more.
Be grateful. Its no accident that so many self-help books encourage readers to practice gratitude. When we regularly take time to be thankful for the things we have, we appreciate them more. Were less likely to take them for granted, and less likely to become jealous of others. Live in the here-and-now, not in the future. The future will come before you know it.
Remember that you are important- to yourself and to your family.
Don't despair, Megan. Go get some help. Please.
lease:
:therethere: :rant:
fftobed:
