WHO is searching for Kyron?

[gardeness]

Everything... EVERYTHING... that Kaine and Desiree have done so far has kept Kyron in the news.

Tee shirts, bracelets, buttons, vigils, billboards, and the likes serve a very important purpose. I would think that most people would recognize that purpose, but for those who don't, I'll say what I think. Those items and events serve to keep the child's face and name out there, but even more importantly the serve as a means for the community to feel supportive of the family and the child, to do something.

Meanwhile, Terri's been doing.... NADA.

bbm
One of the news articles mentions how Kaine and Terri initially called everyone they knew (and/or went to their houses?) when Kyron turned up missing. Terri was clearly active about finding Kyron on her FB before it became private. How does anyone in the public know what Terri has done, or not, since then? Her attorney might have a PI on the case, who would be funded by Terri. Some people make anonymous donations--we don't know if Terri or her parents have or have not made donations. We don't know anything about what Terri's been doing or not doing...

 

[JBean]

[ame="http://websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=115977"]2010.10.02 Search Today on Sauvie - Websleuths Crime Sleuthing Community[/ame]

 

[Pensfan]

We don't have to make an assumption on why they're not searching. They state, in the link I provided, their clear reasons why they are not searching themselves. The two reasons I can remember off-hand without going to get direct quotes are:

Desiree: We don't want to be out there walking around and tripping over evidence.

Kaine: We don't want to get lost.

That link though, provides in their words their reasoning.

That does not, however, answer the question with regard to what they're doing with the funds they're raising for searches, other than to say that since the funds were first announced, no searches have yet been paid for with those funds.

The fund, sadly, is barely over $14,000 according to the Sept 1st statement on numerous Portland stations. This is a miniscule amount when one considers that reimbursing or paying LE (including the dog handlers) overtime will quickly deplete this tiny sum. (Yes, some of the searchers will be volunteers, but not all.) I am baffled by the confusion or implication that this fund is a huge sum of money, because it isn't.

 

[GrainneDhu]

IMO, the best way to keep children safe is to watch them continuously. This is not likely to occur if the primary caretaker has an internet addiction or another form of addiction.

Or a job or a medical condition that requires frequent treatment or any one of a number of other unavoidable life situations.

My husband was a single parent for over 16 years. He would have loved to be able to stay home full time with his son, but he felt it was more important to be able to do so in an actual building rather than under a bridge.

The one and only time his son disappeared, it was while they were taking a nap together. Stepson was four years old, father was exhausted with two jobs. Stepson woke up, quietly got out of bed and went out to play with his best friend. He was found half an hour later, after the worst 30 minutes of my husband's life.

So, oh yeah, there's also sleep time.

 

[GrainneDhu]

Kaine and Desiree's fundraising efforts, media handling, and public interactions have resulted in exactly the same result as Terri. If Terri is innocent, they have made it apparent they do not want anything from her except for her to admit to doing something to their son, which she will not do because she has a very smart attorney. If Terri is guilty, they have made it apparent that they will bully her until she tells them what they want to know,which she will not do because she has a very smart attorney.

This is a zero sum strategy, and I don't understand it. They will never get what they want from Terri. And people just assume it's because she knows, and wants to hurt them more and more. I just leave open the possibility that she cannot do anything more because she didn't do anything. It's a possibility, not a conclusion.

And now it will have to be LE that sorts it all out and present us with a conclusion.

Here's something I've wondered: Are there statistics which show the money spent/raised for selling t-shirts, buttons, bracelets, and the like.....does an effort like this ever really help? I mean, a walking billboard is better than a stationary one, for sure. But has it ever been documented where a child was found because someone saw their picture on a milk carton, t-shirt, or read his/her name on a bracelet?

This isn't a criticism for Kaine and Desiree. I have wondered this through several cases now.

It wasn't exactly the same situation but a couple years ago my service dog took off to find me when I was hospitalised. He was gone for ten horrible days, in part because he was actively avoiding adults trying to catch him.

I signed myself out of the hospital AMA and had help plastering the neighbourhood with flyers. I also had 10,000 business cards printed up with his picture and information on it, so that people could just slip the card into their wallet or pocket and be more likely to remember it longer than just seeing a flyer. An international campaign to fax every business in the area resulted in over 3000 faxes sent.

The winning tip was a direct result of his breeder seeking out groups of children in that neighbourhood to tell them about the lost dog and give them business cards to carry. One of those children woke up, looked out in the backyard and recognised the big, furry dog! And then convinced his parents to call the number on the business card he'd been carefully carrying for four days (which is pretty darn good for a six year old).

The parents didn't want to accept the reward but we convinced them to do so to add to a college fund for their son.

The kicker? The kid either did not know or did not remember there was a reward offered. He just wanted the big furry dog to find his way home again.

It is indirect evidence because dogs aren't children but it definitely led to my getting my beloved service dog back.

 

[pittsburghgirl]

IMO, the best way to keep children safe is to watch them continuously. This is not likely to occur if the primary caretaker has an internet addiction or another form of addiction.

Children cannot be watched continuously and still grow up to be functioning adults. They go to school, to their friends' houses. Parents must work. When they are older, they drive to their activities or the shopping mall. Kids have been abducted from their homes (Polly Klaas, Elizabeth Smart) and from malls, with parents nearby (Adam Walsh) and from quiet small town streets (Lindsey Baum). Kids disappear walking back from the store with friends or while riding their paper route or front their front yards with parents in the house.

Stranger abduction is relatively rare, compared to the number of children who grow up without being abducted. But people want to believe it can't happen to them if they are just smart enough, vigilant enough. That is not always the case. Kyron was last seen at school. If a stranger took him, it wasn't the fault of any parent or step parent. If someone in his family took him, for whatever purposes, he would be one of a larger group of children, not an abductee, but victim of family violence. That's a whole 'nother discussion.

 

[eileenhawkeye]

Children cannot be watched continuously and still grow up to be functioning adults. They go to school, to their friends' houses. Parents must work. When they are older, they drive to their activities or the shopping mall. Kids have been abducted from their homes (Polly Klaas, Elizabeth Smart) and from malls, with parents nearby (Adam Walsh) and from quiet small town streets (Lindsey Baum). Kids disappear walking back from the store with friends or while riding their paper route or front their front yards with parents in the house.

Stranger abduction is relatively rare, compared to the number of children who grow up without being abducted. But people want to believe it can't happen to them if they are just smart enough, vigilant enough. That is not always the case. Kyron was last seen at school. If a stranger took him, it wasn't the fault of any parent or step parent. If someone in his family took him, for whatever purposes, he would be one of a larger group of children, not an abductee, but victim of family violence. That's a whole 'nother discussion.

Thank you for this! I will never understand the whole "watching your child 24/7 so the stranger doesn't get him" mentality. How many children do you know who have been injured playing a sport? Or in a car accident? Yet, you have no problem letting little Johnny go out for the football team and he's in a car everyday. But play outside? Heck no! When you don't let your kids play outside, there going to have to find stuff inside to entertain them and that stuff is going to be technology so their memories of childhood will be looking up Miley Cyrus on the internet and watching 8 hour marathons of iCarly. And we wonder why our children are obese.

 

[RoughlyCollie]

But has it ever been documented where a child was found because someone saw their picture on a milk carton, t-shirt, or read his/her name on a bracelet?.

I don't think milk cartons are used much, if at all, in favor of other methods.

"We're offering this new tool because we know that photos work. In fact, one in six of the children featured in our photo distribution effort is recovered as a direct result of the photo."

Read more: http://news.cnet.com/8301-10784_3-9755734-7.html#ixzz11JnqCVa5​

"Do the posters I see and the cards I get in the mail really help recover missing children?

Absolutely. These posters reach millions and prompt citizens across the country to call the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children's missing children’s hotline and provide vital leads and information, many of which lead to the recovery of missing children."

http://www.missingkids.com/missingkids/servlet/PageServlet?LanguageCountry=en_US&PageId=2816#11

Personally, I think that the various methods of finding children through the distribution of their photographs works mainly when someone who has been in contact with the missing child sees the picture. I look at the photos of missing children on postcards and on flyers at Wal-Mart, but I am extremely unlikely to recall any of them unless one of the photos resembles a child I have been in contact with lately.

I look at the bracelets as being a fund raising tool. Sure, if I wear one, someone may ask me about it, but what are the odds of that person having a clue where Kyron is? Slim and none, IMO. At least with the t-shirts and buttons, there is a photo to refer to, and the odds of someone in the local area seeing the photo and knowing something about Kyron's location are higher than none.

Here is a link to When Your Child Is Missing, published by the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention:
http://www.missingkids.com/en_US/publications/fam_surv.pdf

From what I can tell, reading through this manual, Kryon's parents are doing everything by the book.

 

[LindseyLou]

Its as if someone in LE read my posts on Friday regarding further searches!! LOL (i know its purely coincidental) I am so happy to hear they are searching again. I hope they find something that helps them solve this case and bring Kyron home.

 

[sorrell skye]

I like the idea that Grainne posted about upthread when her companion dog went missing - business cards with his photo & info. Business cards in bulk would be a relatively inexpensive way to get Kyron's info out to a large number of people, although it would take volunteers to distribute the cards. Perhaps the family could have them printed up & pass them out @ the next fundraiser coming up. If each person that attends the fundraiser takes a stack of cards, they could distribute them to everyone they know.

 

[Donjeta]

JMO but I think that the posters and fliers and milk cartons and whatnot are more likely to be useful in a runaway situation than in a (stranger) abduction because runaway children are more likely to be out and about and in communication with a variety of people than children abducted for a variety of nefarious purposes.

It might also work in non-custodial family abductions in which the non-custodial parent took them for the purpose of living with them, not to harm them.

 

[miabellamoure]

I like the idea that Grainne posted about upthread when her companion dog went missing - business cards with his photo & info. Business cards in bulk would be a relatively inexpensive way to get Kyron's info out to a large number of people, although it would take volunteers to distribute the cards. Perhaps the family could have them printed up & pass them out @ the next fundraiser coming up. If each person that attends the fundraiser takes a stack of cards, they could distribute them to everyone they know.

I too agree with this idea of the business cards. I actually had been thinking of something along those lines the other night while out for dinner. Sitting across from our table was a young boy who had such a strong resemblance to Kyron.

I knew it was not him but, at the same time I had an urge to take his picture with my phone to compare it with a Kyron Missing Flier. If I had had a business card with his picture I could have easily held it up to compare right there.

This is actually a great idea...business cards for missing persons!

 

[Kat010]

IMO, the best way to keep children safe is to watch them continuously. This is not likely to occur if the primary caretaker has an internet addiction or another form of addiction.

Oh no. Please don't assign a child to this form of prison. I know what that's like. My mother was paranoid (still is but doesn't affect me any more). She was convinced that I was in mortal danger if I was somewhere else without her.

So I missed a lot of activities. A lot. She didn't want me doing sleepovers at friends' houses. Camping. School trips? She had to go along. Etc. etc.

Kids have to be free to be kids. And their parents have to be people, too, with their lives, to have balance. Watch your kids reasonably, yes. But continuously? Can't be done unless you want to, as the old saying goes, "wrap the kid in cotton and put him on the shelf." The shelf's no fun. Trust me on this.

 

[cluciano63]

Oh no. Please don't assign a child to this form of prison. I know what that's like. My mother was paranoid (still is but doesn't affect me any more). She was convinced that I was in mortal danger if I was somewhere else without her.

So I missed a lot of activities. A lot. She didn't want me doing sleepovers at friends' houses. Camping. School trips? She had to go along. Etc. etc.

Kids have to be free to be kids. And their parents have to be people, too, with their lives, to have balance. Watch your kids reasonably, yes. But continuously? Can't be done unless you want to, as the old saying goes, "wrap the kid in cotton and put him on the shelf." The shelf's no fun. Trust me on this.

ITA. am afraid there will be an entire generation utterly dependent upon others, having never been alone for a moment. My niece just started college and she has met several such kids, including one whose parents moved and bought a house in the college town, otherwise the daughter couldn't go...

Back on topic...sorry. It's hard waiting for news of the search, imagine if you are one of Kyron's loved ones...

 

[pufnstuf]

ITA. am afraid there will be an entire generation utterly dependent upon others, having never been alone for a moment. My niece just started college and she has met several such kids, including one whose parents moved and bought a house in the college town, otherwise the daughter couldn't go...

Back on topic...sorry. It's hard waiting for news of the search, imagine if you are one of Kyron's loved ones...

Almost as bad as a family in my town. When their daughter enrolled in college, so did her parents. Her mother quit her job, and her father had recently retired. Now they're all in college together, and in the marching band together.

I feel so sorry for this girl. Having to be in marching band with her mother and father must be the most embarrassing thing on earth.

And the worst thing about it... the mother posts FB photos of it all. Band practice, football games, getting new band uniforms. That poor girl will never have a life of her own.

 

[miabellamoure]

Almost as bad as a family in my town. When their daughter enrolled in college, so did her parents. Her mother quit her job, and her father had recently retired. Now they're all in college together, and in the marching band together.

I feel so sorry for this girl. Having to be in marching band with her mother and father must be the most embarrassing thing on earth.

And the worst thing about it... the mother posts FB photos of it all. Band practice, football games, getting new band uniforms. That poor girl will never have a life of her own.

Just wondering if these parents also chaperon their daughter at the beer pong parties:toast:...lol!

Sorry for going OT...but, pufnstuf started it!

 

[pittsburghgirl]

if something terrible happens to a child (even illness or a true accident) parents always feel guilty and do the "if only I had..." But the fact is that even careful, reasonably vigilant parents can have children who fall victim to accident or to a predator. Think of all the parents who trusted children to priests, teachers, coaches and scout leaders who turned out to be pedophiles, and very clever ones at that, because they fooled so many adults along the way. Certainly parents should pay attention to a child's activities and whereabouts, but parents must also teach kids to make good decisions, to be able to listen to their instincts to know when something doesn't feel right. The worst thing for parents to teach kids is to always obey adults. Close behind that would be that they don't have to pay attention to their surroundings and learn to make judgments because Mom and Dad will do that for them.

On the other hand, many parents are oblivious to obvious dangers--like teeage girls walking around in public with earbuds in, listening to music or walking around talking on the phone or
texting and thus deaf and blind to their surroundings or kids putting personal info on the internet. And as pensfan pointed out, there are lots of parents who essentially neglect their children because alcohol, drugs, their work, golf or some affair is more important.

Peopke interested in how to help kids become less vulnerable is Gavin de Becker's The Gift of Fear and Protecting the Gift, which is specifically directed to parents.

 

[pittsburghgirl]

To take this back to Kyron, this whole question of who is searching and how is one of the most terrible aspects of a missing case. LE can't let parents become too involved in a search, especially if foul play is suspected because who are the first suspects? Parents, stepparents, other family members, neighbors. And for all the milk carton, websites, etc., it is still possible to hide a child in plain sight (Elizabeth Smart, Sean Hornbeck, Jaycee Dugard). Who knows who else is still out there, because here we have three good examples of kids who might have been able to be rescued earlier; Sean Hornbeck actually commented on the family's missing person website. We know for sure that abductors are good at controlling their captives once they get them onto their own turf.

If it turns out that TH was responsible for Kyron's disappearance, of course none of this applies because he would have been a sitting duck for his own stepmother and everyone really searching for Kyron has no choice but to keep on looking for evidence and for both a live child amd one who was deprived of life by someone who should have protected him.

 

[passionflower]

all I can think of now is Thankyou Searchers........may GOD watch over all of you.
To Desiree, Tony and Kaine......what heartbreak to see all of this, knowing that you may have more heartache to come.
No words can console you at this time.
It must be horrible.
And to the person/people that have done this...........to be free in your soul, you must tell everything!

 

[scotslass]

FYI looks like the MCSO SAR team is all volunteer based they were recruiting as of sept 24 2010. Orientation started on the 29th

" Multnomah County Sheriff's Office Search and Rescue Seeking New Members - 09/24/10
Multnomah County Sheriff's Office Search and Rescue (MCSO SAR) unit is entering a new
training cycle, after a summer of unprecedented activity. The organization's all-volunteer leadership is looking to educate the community and attract more volunteers. An orientation meeting for interested volunteers will be held at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, September 29 at the MCSO Hansen Building, located at
12240 N.E. Glisan St. in Portland. "

http://www.flashalert.net/news.html?id=1276