I have spent a week (yes, a week), reading every post that has to do with BW. This has been exhausting and I can't imagine how the parents feel. Anyway, I joined after lurking because I think maybe I can offer up some insight to the counter-culture that is BW's lifestyle. This isn't to bash her, and I'm going off of information provided by a validated member "Zeaux". Also, I'm a nurse partitioner going on for her M.D. I specialize in addiction therapy and reestablishing relationships between mothers (the addicts) and their children. This is my field and I see and hear of this often.
My opinion (before I begin) is that, BW is alive and she's out there willingly not wanting to come home. Yes, the circumstances regarding the gun and her phone are "mysterious" at best but not out of character for a person who's entire life revolves around a fix *drugs*. It was more than established that while she wanted to get better, her substance abuse problems weren't getting better. She hadn't a job, nor custody of her daughter - she also wasn't just using meth (although, her drug of choice), which speaks volumes. It means she is an addict and there for, while she may prefer one over another - anything is going to do as long as it keeps the withdrawals at bay. I can't help but view her photos used as recent and not see her as being pregnant *although that won't and hasn't been confirmed or denied just "I haven't heard she was".*. It's highly probable she went to DH for a drug exchange. Anyone stating she left on foot and has been around those that use and are in need of another fix will tell you, nothing and I do mean nothing, will stop them from getting there. What happened after she arrived and since is pure speculation and mind numbing.
Again, I'm not saying pretty or sweet things about BW but I'm trying to paint a picture that puts this all into a more plausible state of why she may not be coming around. Yes, I'm aware of the charges against her family members (disgusting) but SHE is the focus. Zeaux was attempting nothing more than to shed light on how BW might behave, look or the type of people she would be around. I'm going to do the same because it seems everyone has lost track of finding her, but let's face it - she may not want to be found.
I'm a former addict (over a decade clean) and at her age it was full blown. I began before 13 and ran away more times than I can count. I did not do speed, I did heroin. However, I ran in the same circles - as all drug users do although they prefer their own kind... but the "speed freaks" were just as paranoid as us in regards to trouble, getting arrested and going through withdrawal and the like. That drug came before anything and everything. If BW is in the throws of addiction / use - it is NOT hard to disappear, at all. More so where she's at now and the warm climates should could hitch hike too. The only way she's in police protection is if she's in a rehab center. She has to also pay for this habit now (I feel she's alive) and she had to pay for it before now. Yes, she could have sold (providing her with more contacts who know someone who know someone) but where would she stay and speed users tend to fight like cats n' dogs due to no sleep and dwindling supplies. She would have to change her placement often.
Her family is trying to find a person with a serious drug addiction that when she's off her self-medicating binges - she understands things in a manic low. "My daughter, she's not with me. What do I have to live for?". And typically that leads to depression till the next fix, and the cycle remains that way till a person takes off and leaves everything behind, so there's no reminders in the way - and sometimes they'll reemerge once they feel they've healed enough to cope with the questions of everyone behind.
Bringing BW home is more than just "bringing her home". If she's out there, she's in a bad way - and she needs a real authentic support system in place because drug addictions don't just go away. The psychology behind addiction is simple: avoidance and pleasure. I don't care if it's heroin, oxy's or meth. People wouldn't do it, if it didn't feel good but quitting means giving up that euphoria and also being sick. If she is out there and unable to fund her habit (that would be darn near impossible for a 19 year old woman to "run out" or not trade things... there's 60 year olds that can pull it off) - she would have surfaced. If she's at these seedy truck stops, and yes I know it was a PING and not true to her being there ... what are the odds that she's working / traveling? Pretty high but no one wants to go there and right now, if we want to think of her anything but dead - let's face reality of a female addict without a job who's been able to maintain her habit for at least 3 years.
In order for a realistic search to take place, her life has to be sleuthed. Where was her main "go to" for drugs? When that person wasn't reliable, who was next? Now, these are usually the scariest people to deal with because rarely people deal in just meth. They won't give her up (they do not want police / DEA in their homes or CPS in most cases) and won't own up to knowing her, unless someone that used with her does leg work. For all we know, someone has and that's why the search seems fruitless.
I would almost bet that WWH had been deleting messages etc because of drugs NOT anything sexual. There's no way she's not involved (as everyone has said). Her husband was known to sell his Rx meds and by viewing photos of everyone - I looked at pupils. yep, the eyes hold it all my friends. So does the skin, and various stages of gaunt. Meth makes everyone almost look the same in facial structure but pills? It's a tad different. As far as BW's "throw away" phone. If she can get money for drugs, she can get money for a new prepaid (they are 20.00 and 20.00 for minutes). Also, a lot of people trade for drugs and a new phone landing in her lap for a trade, not hard. Working in off the beaten path "exotic dance" clubs, where drugs are available -connects are available and other women in hiding are, a place to look. Truck stops, rest areas = a place to look. Skid row hourly hotels, a place to look. Some don't even ask for an ID or a CC, just cash on the daily.
The entire answer in "What happened to BW" will be found with a combination of her parents being truly open and honest with the public, they have to stop enabling and tucking their tails. They DO want her home but I think are absolutely ashamed of her drug use and do not want her daughter ever reading it. Understandable but they need to pick and choose: be honest and get her home or found, or continue to skirt around things which render the entire investigation. Cops will give up because no one is owning up to anything. Imagine asking the same questions "Where did she get her drugs from" and everyone shrugging. I mean, you can only ask for so long. And it'll take her friends, maybe someone will get clean and in their rehabilitation, they will talk.
If she's not alive, I will be shocked. Frankly, I disappeared for 10 years - had 2 kids and went to a prestigious UNI (I come from wealth) and you know what? No one ever found me till I came home. All because my parents didn't want to report I had a lil' habit and were scared those people that provided me with drugs would come after them. I wouldn't have come home anyway but none the less, I know this is typical. I see it now, in the hospital. Women or young girls having babies and when I ask for next of Kin etc - their eyes dart. Fear is a powerful thing. Shame is next to it.
I'm keeping a very close eye on this case because after following Carina Saunders case and just being mind blown (I had a feeling she was murdered but my god, nothing prepared me for the details surrounding that and yes, it was meth related as well) - I want to see someone get away and run far far from it all, come back and be well. Everyone loves a great come back story.
concerning her not taking her daughter, she didn't have custody and she doesn't seem like she's that out of touch with reality. She knew her daughter wasn't going to get the best care and frankly speaking - was coming in 2nd to her lifestyle choices, which isn't fair. Did she know about the sexual abuse? There's not a way she didn't know at least about her brother. I think he's more victim than abuser but that's neither here nor there. I'm sure they got high together and I'm sure things came out about his abuse, people - addicts mainly - have this in common and when you are high, you talk. You speak openly and candidly. Drugs are a bonding experience for people with no coping or social skills often times.
Regarding "You won't be in trouble, just come home", Zeaux maintained that was possibly in regards to the traffic warrants and also who knows. Maybe BW missed a meeting with officials in regards to visitation access to her daughter, failed a drug screen etc. We don't' know but she's also on a highly paranoid drug and she most likely lives in fear (maybe even from the texts DH received if she was "seeking"). I think people are covering more up about the drugs than they are the abuse, because I think that was so deep down hidden from many - that they were blindsided by it all. I really do. I just think DH was supplying to many (I know enough ex pill heads and current) to know of the paranoia that runs with that. WWH would want to erase it all so that there wouldn't be the drug task force involved as well. AKA felonies and prescription fraud is a big one.
I did read in a side note that heroin is making a huge comeback in that area, that's frightening too. Just do not give up hope on BW and if you start to, read the Doe Network in the "Identified" cases. Some people were missing from 1970 -2010 by CHOICE.
I hope this doesn't come off as rude but it drove me nuts that no one touched on this angle in a realistic manner. Cops aren't looking that hard because a) she's made contact with them and they are in no way shape or form, by law, under any order to tell the parents anything. She's 19. b) she's off in addict land and working how she see fits to use and avoid "sick". Reality will come down sooner than later and when it does, she may reach out. This is why everyone should keep her face in your thoughts..the back of your mind .More so if you work in health care, pharmacies, Wal-Marts and gas stations. If she's using meth, she'll need the precursors for creation - that means the pharmacy aisles. If she gets injured or sick, the ER or urgent care - as even the highest of high will want xanax or a possible pain pill (they can trade it if anything else).
BW is in my thoughts and at 19, she has an entire world ahead of her. Home is where she makes it better for herself, may she be safe - hiding out and wanting recovery as long as she doesn't have to go back there (which I feel would be the worst case scenario since she used there and the stress currently wouldn't be healthy). I don't think she's so far gone that she wouldn't recognize "If I'm going to get better... I have to get out and never come back" (addicts think in black/white ways). She may come back but if so, it would be awhile. I've dropped off the face of this earth so many times to large cities in the US and EU without much more than 20.00 to my name. Trust me, it's not that hard.
