Anthony Bourdain, 61, Tv Chef And Travel Host, Found Dead, Suicide

[AzPistonsGirl]

Some members of Websleuths may recall fellow WSer Katiecoolady and her reports to us from the Jodi Arias trial. I subscribe to her blog, and I was quite moved by what she wrote this week in response to Anthony Bourdain’s death and pleas in the media to #reachout. She is a former psychiatric nurse who has experience with family members who suffer. This is the relevant snippet, but the whole post is well worth reading....it’s called “Reach In.”

Expecting someone experiencing the throes of that kind of immobilized, pervasive symptomology–to rail against it completely and be able to reach out– is akin to asking someone in the throes of a full blown myocardial infarction to begin CPR on themself.

There is so much more than these trite “reminders” or “admonitions” to suicidal people to “reach out”. I think more has to be educated to THE REST OF US, to reach in. How to do it, what to say, when to intervene, how to intervene.

Reach In #reachin

Liking this post with a click was not enough, Lilibet - I am re-posting within my reply. Thank you

 

[AzPistonsGirl]

Another Detroiter here who really appreciates seeing and feeling the city through AB's eyes, ears, tongue, essence, words and being.

That goes for all of the places he visited and shared. Travel is not one of my passions so being able to sorta feel some of what a place feels like through his words was amazing. What a natural talent, honed by his experiences and choices...

 

[Satchie]

I have no idea how you got that from that post. That post was very clearly advocating for people to reach out to others and not expect that people in mental health crises will reach out. Nobody said anything about forcing anyone to do anything. I don't understand the venom.

Identify those moments when it is time to take over for them–get them in the hospital or to a doctor for medication. Not to “encourage them” but to simply sweep them up and say “we are going, now... So what if you get someone to be evaluated who ends up not hospitalized or deemed in need of that? It’s the same as if you take someone to the hospital who, may be having a heart attack, but in reality is experiencing indigestion.”.

Reach In #reachin

I have an older sister like the one writing this article, who compulsively takes charge and tries to control other people and "fix them", so that would be where the venom comes from.

 

[Lilibet]

So, someone is not feeling suicidal, but you ignore their denials and drag them to emergency? Hopefully your relationship will survive this.

I suggest you re-read the post. In talking about taking someone to ER, Katie was specifically talking about what she has had to do with family members in the context of getting them help in very real emergencies. Obviously, she’d like them to survive a mental health crisis, even if, in the moment they hate her (which has happened). Obviously, every situation is different, particularly with friends, but the whole point is to “reach in” when possible, rather than just telling people with the symptoms she described to “reach out.” Reaching in doesn’t necessarily involve whisking someone off to ER against their will. I’m surprised you didn’t discern that, but I hope this helps.

 

[Lilibet]

Reach In #reachin

I have an older sister like the one writing this article, who compulsively takes charge and tries to control other people and "fix them", so that would be where the venom comes from.

OK, I see where you are coming from. I’m sorry you have to deal with a sister like that. It must be awful!

However, I have been reading Katiecoolady’s blog for a number of years and there is nothing compulsive about her. One family member has serious mental illness and cannot be “fixed” but can be helped to function and have a decent quality of life, rather than living on the streets. Katie (Kathy) has used every tool available to her to make this happen. Her family member would probably be dead if she hadn’t “reached in.” And since she lost her sister to murder, I can only imagine how important her relationship with this family member is to her...and to him.

 

[BetteDavisEyes]

What to Do When You Think Someone is Suicidal

...Call 911 in case of an emergency.
In addition to calling 911, stay with the person until emergency services arrive, Poland said. It’s vital not to leave a suicidal person alone. You can show support and compassion by saying things like “‘I’m going to be there for you,’ I’m going to visit you’ or ‘Who can I call for you,’” he added...

What to Do When You Think Someone is Suicidal | Psych Central

My youngest sister (now deceased, Multiple Myeloma at age 57) suffered from schizo-affective disorder for much of her adult life. She was in and out of psychiatric facilities frequently but had long periods of stability during which she was able to live a fairly productive life. My sister made several unsuccessful attempts to take her own life.

When she lived with my mother, Mom's biggest fear was that she'd find her youngest child dead in the house or car. During episodes of psychiatric decompensation when it became apparent that my sister's life might be in danger, doctors and social workers advised my mom to called the police rather than try to reason with my sister or suggest that she should be in the hospital. This alleviates having the family members become confrontational and possibly escalate a tenuous situation.

 

[flourish]

Reach In #reachin

I have an older sister like the one writing this article, who compulsively takes charge and tries to control other people and "fix them", so that would be where the venom comes from.

Oh, so you were actually reacting to something in the linked blog article which wasn't included in the post to which you were replying, nor specified in your reply, and had more to do with your family history than the quoted post. I'm sure you can see how unclear and confusing that appeared.

Doing anything to help someone who doesn't want or can't understand they need to accept help is always a sticky and scary situation without a clear-cut universal answer.

I don't know that it's fair to make the statement that the blog writer is like your sister and controlling, but it definitely is obvious that the blog triggered some big feelings. The big difference would be that it sounds like your sister "helps" people in order to meet her own needs, not necessarily to actually help the person, while the person writing the article actually has the best interests of the other person in mind.

I am sorry to hear your sister is challenging. I am always so grateful to have the wonderful siblings I have!

 

[Barb Wire]

Anthony Bourdain's 'crazy' love for Asia Argento worried his circle of friends: report
Though some things about Bourdain's sudden death remain a mystery, one thing that is certain was the food connoisseur's love for Italian actress, Asia Argento. But his passionate love for Argento reportedly had some of Bourdain's friends a little concerned.

The "Parts Unknow" host and Argento met in 2016 during a taping for Bourdain's show and officially began dating a year later.

According to People, a friend of Argento recently revealed to the publication that Bourdain was "madly in love" with the Italian actress, describing him as "a teenage boy just absolutely lovestruck."
Anthony Bourdain's 'crazy' love for Asia Argento worried his circle of friends: report

 

[Barb Wire]

EVERYTHING SEEMED GOOD WITH GF... Until This Week



9:00 AM PT -- Asia just released a statement addressing Bourdain's passing, saying ... "Anthony gave all of himself in everything that he did. His brilliant, fearless spirit touched and inspired so many, and his generosity knew no bounds. He was my love, my rock, my protector."

She continues, "I am beyond devastated. My thoughts are with his family. I would ask that you respect their privacy and mine."

Anthony Bourdain and Asia Argento seemed as tight as ever just last week ... but it appears something changed within the last few days.

While Bourdain was shooting for Parts Unknown in France before his death, Argento was spotted holding hands with another man in Rome, according to TMZ.
Here's where things get murky. We know Anthony was shooting his show in France this week -- he'd been there for at least 4 days. However, Asia was back in Rome, strolling around with a French reporter named Hugo Clément. There were photos of them holding hands and hugging, but the Italian photographer who shot the pics pulled them off the market on the heels of Anthony's death.

It's unclear if Anthony and Asia had broken up. If they did, there was no public announcement. Their last public appearance together was at an event was back in April in NYC.

I found a picture of Asia & Hugo Clément. holding hugging but can't get it on here


Anthony Bourdain and Asia Argento Together -

 

[Really?]

I’m pretty sure the pics of her and Hugo sent him over the edge......

I googled and there are plenty of pics of the two in Rome while AB was in France.

 

[Barb Wire]

Who Is Hugo Clement? New Details About The French Reporter Anthony Bourdain's Girlfriend Was Seen With Before He Died

Amy Lamare
Blogger
Buzz
June 9, 2018
She was seen holding hands with another man in Rome.

Who is Hugo Clement? Anthony Bourdain died Friday, June 8th in France. The cause of death was an apparent suicide. That much we know. We also know that Bourdain struggled with demons and was quite frank about this fact. He leaves behind a young daughter, friends, family, and his girlfriend, Italian actress and director Asia.
In my mind this changes everything.
I found a picture of him on a bike ride hours before his death he looks sad His face... deep thoughts.


Todd Liebler on Instagram: “Rolling like a kid in #alsace Having fun with the #osmo and #anthonybourdain on #partsunknown #lifeontheroad #bikedate : @romerocker”


Argento.Who Is Hugo Clement? New Details About The French Reporter Anthony Bourdain's Girlfriend Was Seen With Before He Died

Bourdain and Argento have been dating since early 2017. When she went public with rape allegations against Harvey Weinstein, Bourdain stood by her saying "I am proud and honored to know you. You just did the hardest thing in the world." However, did something change in the days before his death? Let's take a look at the details we know so far.


Who Is Hugo Clement? New Details About The French Reporter Anthony Bourdain's Girlfriend Was Seen With Before He Died

 

[Barb Wire]

Photog who caught Asia Argento with French reporter says he regrets snapping pics
THe photographer who snapped Asia Argento with French reporter Hugo Clément just a few days before her boyfriend, Anthony Bourdain, committed suicide. (Reuters)

Rino Barillari, the paparazzo who caught Asia Argento dancing in a Roman restaurant with French reporter Hugo Clément, regrets he took the photos and sold them to Chi, an Italian magazine.

Argento’s recent lover, Anthony Bourdain, 61, committed suicide on June 8, five days after the photos first appeared online.

“If I had known, I would have stopped,” the photographer told La Verità. “A picture is not worth a life. If that shot triggered suicide . . . this would make me suffer.”
Who Is Hugo Clement? New Details About The French Reporter Anthony Bourdain's Girlfriend Was Seen With Before He Died


Photog who caught Asia Argento with French reporter says he regrets snapping pics

 

[rosemadderlake]

Total speculation... But I have a feeling AB met certain aspects of his youth, (his first wife) in his current GF, his longing for her, in a kind of tragic poetic way. Both were a wild ride.

To paraphrase one of the CNN staff remembrances now turned public announcement for suicide awareness: 'someone might be able to reveal their past, but it dosen't mean they can reveal the now.'

The restless soul -- artists, writers, filmmakers, musicians, can wax poetic, but it is common touch that Bourdain knew. He really knew "the street". I love that about him.

It is the darkest place, it didn't happen over night.

Those pictures, young handsome man, GF all over him, don't look good. FYI, it's "doctors without borders", not love without borders...

I can see a man of Bourdain's fame, stature, age, would be, could be, devastated.

 

[Estelle]

Total speculation... But I have a feeling AB met certain aspects of his youth, (his first wife) in his current GF, his longing for her, in a kind of tragic poetic way. Both were a wild ride.

To paraphrase one of the CNN staff remembrances now turned public announcement for suicide awareness: 'someone might be able to reveal their past, but it dosen't mean they can reveal the now.'

The restless soul -- artists, writers, filmmakers, musicians, can wax poetic, but it is common touch that Bourdain knew. He really knew "the street". I love that about him.

It is the darkest place, it didn't happen over night.

Those pictures, young handsome man, GF all over him, don't look good. FYI, it's "doctors without borders", not love without borders...

I can see a man of Bourdain's fame, stature, age, would be, could be, devastated.

I posted about this earlier. I totally agree with your thoughts here. Even though Bourdain claimed that he would not marry Asia and that they had an open relationship, it would have been totally devastating to actually see the woman you love giving affection to a young man in pictures in a publication.

I am wondering whether Bourdain contacted Asia to talk about it or even if she knew about the pictures being published. Or did he silently, without discussing his feelings with anyone, realise that he might be losing her love and could not face that fact.

He would have had a dilemma - he wanted to stay married due to his daughter, he wanted Asia in his life but realised that while he was away working, she had met another guy (whether it was going to be serious or just a fling), he would have to give up the job he loved for the woman he loved otherwise he could lose her.

But suicide was not the answer. He lost the woman he loved, the job he loved and the daughter he loved now does not have a father!

 

[kaen]

Unfortunately, we will never know what triggered him to commit suicide. While we can speculate about the photo as a trigger, I have read in published articles that their relationship was an open one so we can't know. I can't help but wonder if this was a plan or a spur of the moment decision. Ugh, I am so very sad about this.

 

[Cherry]

one article did state that the scene appeared "rash" iow not very well planned out but no one elaborated.

 

[Seattle1]

I came late to the Anthony Bourdain admiration club -- around 2011, and I never looked back.

About 7 years ago, it was AB that came to the defense of one 86 year old Grand Forks, ND Grandmother: Marilyn Hagerty, the columnist for the Grand Forks Herald, got roasted by those who thought they know restaurant reviews better because she wrote a restaurant review of an Olive Garden. (The nerve...). Bourdain stepped in and defended her with a single tweet.

“Very much enjoying watching Internet sensation Marilyn Hagerty triumph over the snarkologists (myself included).”

Next he got the North Dakota writer a reservation at New York’s Le Bernardin restaurant, and signed a deal to write the foreword to her book of reviews which he picked — called “Grand Forks,” get it?

The book foreword (see link) he wrote was also brilliant!

Marilyn Hagerty: Anthony Bourdain 'tall and handsome and ple...
https://blogs.mprnews.org/newscut/2...in-stopped-the-snark-against-marilyn-hagerty/

 

[Seattle1]

Anthony Bourdain 'is cremated in France after killing himself in a hotel room' as his girlfriend Asia Argento meets Rose McGowan and then quotes break-up song by singer who died of suicide.

Anthony Bourdain 'is cremated in France less than a week after killing himself in a hotel room' | Daily Mail Online

 

[Seattle1]

Total speculation... But I have a feeling AB met certain aspects of his youth, (his first wife) in his current GF, his longing for her, in a kind of tragic poetic way. Both were a wild ride.

To paraphrase one of the CNN staff remembrances now turned public announcement for suicide awareness: 'someone might be able to reveal their past, but it dosen't mean they can reveal the now.'

The restless soul -- artists, writers, filmmakers, musicians, can wax poetic, but it is common touch that Bourdain knew. He really knew "the street". I love that about him.

It is the darkest place, it didn't happen over night.

Those pictures, young handsome man, GF all over him, don't look good. FYI, it's "doctors without borders", not love without borders...

I can see a man of Bourdain's fame, stature, age, would be, could be, devastated.

This post is spot on!

Seems to me AB lived hard and loved hard -- and the photos I saw were brutal.

I also recall a round-table interview a couple years ago where AB talked about his desire to teach "Creative Writing" to inquisitive, young minds, hoping to inspire some "punks," just as a teacher had done for him. He was so passionate when he spoke of this -- I'll never forget it! It was his Plan-B, "get off the pony," and be closer for his daughters teen years. I'm sure it's why I too think his suicide was an impulsive act. So sorry for his family and friends. Godspeed AB.

 

[rosemadderlake]

This post is spot on!

Seems to me AB lived hard and loved hard -- and the photos I saw were brutal.

I also recall a round-table interview a couple years ago where AB talked about his desire to teach "Creative Writing" to inquisitive, young minds, hoping to inspire some "punks," just as a teacher had done for him. He was so passionate when he spoke of this -- I'll never forget it! It was his Plan-B, "get off the pony," and be closer for his daughters teen years. I'm sure it's why I too think his suicide was an impulsive act. So sorry for his family and friends. Godspeed AB.

Oh, I'd love to see that interview.

I do believe this man was a writer, first.

Ecco Press's founder, editor, Dan Halpern published Kitchen Confidential. He also edited and published Patti Smith's, Just Kids. Ecco Press is well known in the world of poetry. And Halpern is a genius in recognizing a modern and true literary voice.

Bourdain had the gift of looks, he was tall and handsome, had a beautiful narrator's voice, had an eye for the visual in film, and oh my goodness he could cook!!! But it is his writing chops that soared.

He would have been the most excellent of creative writing professors.

In reading about him this past week, I was surprised at his public adoration of his GF (too upset to say her name). All the "I'm honored" posts... In a way, it was so not "him". He was obviously a deeply private man. And one of his many gifts was his ability to be the unknown, detached narrative, while being famous at the same time.

So, while I agree whole heartedly with mcgowen's statement defending his GF, because I believe Bourdain's leaving was his choice alone, a culmination at the crossroads, and I think there might have been physical malaise factors, too, I chalk it up to not only karma, but a call to look at the superficial versus the depth.

Bourdain's life, the essence of who he is will live on as an inspiration. Every marginalized voice has his inspiration. Every exotic destination does, too. And, greatness is often not recognized until it's gone.

While suicide is so very scary, it does not impede greatness. And Bourdain definitely sits at the table of greatness.

I'll miss this man. He was my Sunday night. I really dislike cooking shows, but I fell hopelessly in love with Anthony Bourdain. My favorites were his stories about the good 'ol USA: SC, TX, WA, MA, NY (the Bronx!), NJ, and most recently West Virginia. What an epic episode! The guns, the extraordinary beauty, the faith of its beautiful peeps, the coal mine, and the football game...

That's how I'll remember him