Armchair Psych discussion of Jodi Arias

[SMK]

We could have a thread on how to cope with a psychopath in your life. I've never really come across information on how to deal with run except to run and this is not always an option.

Great idea.

 

[SMK]

I have, only once. He's very stubborn. I told him she was a cancer on the family and I was suspicious of her. I don't trust her. I am afraid for him and what might happen to him if he ever tries to leave her. Again, another reason why I am so passionate about awareness.

I hope somehow he is useful enough to her that he will never find himself in her bad graces.

 

[Cate49]

Jodi's family interaction is curious to me. She has two siblings I think? Neither have been in court although I have read her art is sold through brother's site. Her father has limited attendance and believe I heard he is very sick. She has used them for her domestic violence angle. Do the parents of these women (CA) forgive their children for using them to avoid conviction?

 

[aussiegirl]

Cate49 - I do think that as a mother, I could forgive my child pretty most anything - including killing an ex partner. It doesn't mean I would agree with what she did, or support it. It doesn't mean I wouldn't think it was horrific. But I do believe, I would move heaven and earth to assist my child in anyway I could to avoid the death penalty or life in prison.

However, if my child killed their own child - I don't know how I would go with forgiving that. But I do think, if my grandchild was dead, I would want my child to get all the help they could, if that was the only thing I had left. But I'm not sure if I could forgive that, but I would want my child to get help.

I can understand where the parents who support their murderous children are coming from. I'm not saying it's the right thing, but my love for my child is all encompassing, and I think, perhaps, I would want to support my child, even if I was appalled and disgusted by what they did.

I think it must be very hard to do something bad enough for your parents to stop loving you, although I reckon CA must have come close.

 

[SMK]

Jodi's family interaction is curious to me. She has two siblings I think? Neither have been in court although I have read her art is sold through brother's site. Her father has limited attendance and believe I heard he is very sick. She has used them for her domestic violence angle. Do the parents of these women (CA) forgive their children for using them to avoid conviction?

They probably do forgive, as Aussie girl has also pointed out.
I recall once reading something a writer said - she was unmarried with no children - about how if she had a child who committed murder, she would not forgive and would no longer love them.

Well, first of all I took into account that she was not a mother. Secondly, there was a book (cannot recall the author now, but I think it was entitled "The Tyranny of Values") - and the author was some kind of behavioral researcher and theorist from an Ivy League college. He said that statistics and empirical data revealed that blood ties and parental instinct outweigh abstract notions of justice.

As aussie pointed out, that doesn't mean the parent is not horrified, angry, disappointed, shocked, etc.

 

[SMK]

As we are speaking of Jodi's family:

1. With her little brother - note the date: 9 days before the murder
   [*]with her younger sister
   [*]On vacation with her Dad

 

[Cate49]

They are a good looking family. Her brother looks young and her father has aged. Her hair looks blond 9 days prior. Good find SMK

 

[IBsleuthin]

Cate49 - I do think that as a mother, I could forgive my child pretty most anything - including killing an ex partner. It doesn't mean I would agree with what she did, or support it. It doesn't mean I wouldn't think it was horrific. But I do believe, I would move heaven and earth to assist my child in anyway I could to avoid the death penalty or life in prison.

However, if my child killed their own child - I don't know how I would go with forgiving that. But I do think, if my grandchild was dead, I would want my child to get all the help they could, if that was the only thing I had left. But I'm not sure if I could forgive that, but I would want my child to get help.

I can understand where the parents who support their murderous children are coming from. I'm not saying it's the right thing, but my love for my child is all encompassing, and I think, perhaps, I would want to support my child, even if I was appalled and disgusted by what they did.

I think it must be very hard to do something bad enough for your parents to stop loving you, although I reckon CA must have come close.

American prisons are full on every single visiting day of exhausted, guilt ridden parents trying their level best to come to terms with their own lives and how it effected their child enough to have them end up in prison.

I love my children but that doesn't mean I have to support their bad decisions.

 

[IBsleuthin]

When I look at these photos above here all I can think of is this didn't have to happen. There was NO reason for this to happen. She could have walked away. She chose this path and it's a bad one.

 

[IBsleuthin]

We could have a thread on how to cope with a psychopath in your life. I've never really come across information on how to deal with run except to run and this is not always an option.

The single greatest predictor of lethality when dealing with domestic abuse in this situation is the expression of or desire to kill you.

If someone you know tells you they are going to kill you or are thinking about killing you BELIEVE THEM.

Make yourself as boring as possible and start creating an exit plan. It may already be too late.

Never again agree to be alone or isolated with that person.

Never underestimate that they are willing to kill several people in the household because normally their plan is one of EXIT themselves. So there are no consequences in their mind when they are planning this.

I come across very strong in my statements here because I absolutely know what I'm talking about and people need to stop thinking it won't happen to them. People need to stop thinking it only happens to other people in other towns.

 

[Tiger09]

They probably tried tough love and now wonder where they went wrong- human nature. Watch the movie or read the book We Need to Talk About Kevin by Lionel Shriver. It's about a woman whose son is possibly a sociopath and commits a school shooting and kills his father and sister. She has to deal with the town and the world attacking her because they can't attack her son, and coming to grips with what her son did, and still loving her kid, but they always had a rocky relationship. It's amazing and it really makes you see every angle.

 

[SMK]

They are a good looking family. Her brother looks young and her father has aged. Her hair looks blond 9 days prior. Good find SMK

I wish I had photos this happy looking from my own family. ha

 

[shelley921]

Especially if he was wrapped in sheets and she had, say, knotted part of it to act like a "handle".

I wish I had photos this happy looking from my own family. ha

the photos are deceptive. they have to be an extremely dysfunctional family.

 

[ATasteOfHoney]

The single greatest predictor of lethality when dealing with domestic abuse in this situation is the expression of or desire to kill you.

If someone you know tells you they are going to kill you or are thinking about killing you BELIEVE THEM.

Make yourself as boring as possible and start creating an exit plan. It may already be too late.

Never again agree to be alone or isolated with that person.

Never underestimate that they are willing to kill several people in the household because normally their plan is one of EXIT themselves. So there are no consequences in their mind when they are planning this.

I come across very strong in my statements here because I absolutely know what I'm talking about and people need to stop thinking it won't happen to them. People need to stop thinking it only happens to other people in other towns.

Good post and I agree completely! We should all take heed to those subtle (and not so subtle warnings) and listen with our gut and mind.
It is a tougher thing to do if you're surrounded by family members who have grown dysfunctional as an aspect of dealing with a mentally sick individual within the family. It becomes so confusing as members attempt to "gaslight", generalize, minimalize, dissociate, and "mirror" others. Eventually, the continued interaction with the mentally sick family member makes all others sick too......so it is scary. :twocents:

 

[Woe.be.gone]

This is so depressing.
What's with the string of emails between the husband and wife, the Hughes, and TA? Why aren't they allowed to be read outloud in their entirety in court?

Hearing about these emails causes me to wonder how or why TA could be so uncaring to another person too. Why use JA to the degree he did and treat her badly in public? Just because she let him? How is that such an upstanding person/gentlemen? I don't get it. Are people going to suggest that JA wrote those emails? Why would the couple have been concerned enough to write them to him in the first place?

Now I'm beginning to wonder what's wrong with me because I can understand how a person with a disorder could possibly be pushed to extreme behavior (not to excuse but to explain). Don't they have the "do onto others as you would want them to do unto you" saying in Mormonism?

On the other threads most people are bashing and name calling the new witness, Alyce L. I find that so disgusting and my stomach hurt after I read over there for awhile. Where's the compassion for her? All she is doing is testifying according to her expertise. It's her truth and a way to look at how people may develop the way they do. They're calling her a has been from the 70's, etc. So what happens if one ever crosses a person who posts like this? This is troubling to me indeed. I have compassion for people who are treated unfairly and for people who are bullied.

Oh and we may as well get the stake ready for Jean C. They're ready to wish her ill will too for some reason. Nice.

 

[Woe.be.gone]

Huge Bombshell in court just now.

Mrs. Laviolette just testified to the fact that the Hughs', close friends of TA, wrote JA an email in jan of 2007 telling her to move on and that TA has been (is) abusive to women.

JM is fighting hard to keep this out.

Oh is this how they spell it?
This troubles me.

 

[MeeBee]

This is so depressing.
What's with the string of emails between the husband and wife, the Hughes, and TA? Why aren't they allowed to be read outloud in their entirety in court?

Hearing about these emails causes me to wonder how or why TA could be so uncaring to another person too. Why use JA to the degree he did and treat her badly in public? Just because she let him? How is that such an upstanding person/gentlemen? I don't get it. Are people going to suggest that JA wrote those emails? Why would the couple have been concerned enough to write them to him in the first place?

Now I'm beginning to wonder what's wrong with me because I can understand how a person with a disorder could possibly be pushed to extreme behavior (not to excuse but to explain). Don't they have the "do onto others as you would want them to do unto you" saying in Mormonism?

On the other threads most people are bashing and name calling the new witness, Alyce L. I find that so disgusting and my stomach hurt after I read over there for awhile. Where's the compassion for her? All she is doing is testifying according to her expertise. It's her truth and a way to look at how people may develop the way they do. They're calling her a has been from the 70's, etc. So what happens if one ever crosses a person who posts like this? This is troubling to me indeed. I have compassion for people who are treated unfairly and for people who are bullied.

Oh and we may as well get the stake ready for Jean C. They're ready to wish her ill will too for some reason. Nice.

Ask yourself this: if the email really said what was suggested, why didn't the defense call Sky Hughes themselves to explain it? Wait until Sky Hughes is called in rebuttal to explain what this email meant. I have a feeling that she was bluffing to get Jodi away from Travis, or Jodi was lying on Travis when the Hughes' told her they didn't like her and just told her to leave him then. When the Hughes were presented with pedophile letters Travis supposedly wrote, they were shocked and saddened. When they learned they were forgeries, they were pizzed. I would bet money it's the same situation here.

Two of Travis' exes have take the stand and they both said he was kind, respectful, attentive and never ever treated them bad. I trust them more than anyone else because they were actually in a relationship with him. Why was the Jodi the only one to get the very worst of Travis? It makes no sense.

 

[Woe.be.gone]

Yes, I agree - and also that the jury may feel insulted by the whole "frump" routine....

The perp of every trial is always cleaned up or frumped down - whatever it takes to cause the accused to appear more sympathetic to the jury. I've never watched a trial where accused hasn't been cleaned up or toned down or whatever. The defense team is in charge of the makeover, not the defendant.

 

[Woe.be.gone]

Ask yourself this: if the email really said what was suggested, why didn't the defense call Sky Hughes themselves to explain it? Wait until Sky Hughes is called in rebuttal to explain what this email meant. I have a feeling that she was bluffing to get Jodi away from Travis, or Jodi was lying on Travis when the Hughes' told her they didn't like her and just told her to leave him then. When the Hughes were presented with pedophile letters Travis supposedly wrote, they were shocked and saddened. When they learned they were forgeries, they were pizzed. I would bet money it's the same situation here.

Two of Travis' exes have take the stand and they both said he was kind, respectful, attentive and never ever treated them bad. I trust them more than anyone else because they were actually in a relationship with him. Why was the Jodi the only one to get the very worst of Travis? It makes no sense.

Why can't the emails be read word for word then so jurors can judge for themselves? They should be self-explanatory if honest. It's the hidden stuff, on either side, that bothers me in trials. The whole truth and nothing but the truth is a crock as far as evidence goes.
This is the first I'm hearing about pedophile letters - yikes! Did JA supposedly write the letters? If so, wow.

I wish I hadn't missed the first couple weeks of testimony. I came on board when JA was already on the stand. This trial is long with big time lapses. Just when new info is coming out, that I'd like to hear both sides regarding asap, we have to wait four days to get back to testimony.

 

[Boots-OK]

I wish I had photos this happy looking from my own family. ha

Am I the only one that sees the little brother as troubled and dark in that picture? Troublesome? jmoo