Australia - Allison Baden-Clay, 43, Brisbane QLD, 19 April 2012 - #11

[AllyG]

Then there'a the other side. Female Police officer married to an alcoholic. Trying to concentrate at work wondering if he's going to put the kids in the car and drive somewhere,or fall asleep smoking and burn the house and kids down. How could I let people know what was going on at home and have any credibility in my work.
One day I just got the kids and walked out in the clothes we were standing up in after 20 years .
QPS was great organised a Police house etc.
I felt like someone had been holding me under water and I had broken through the surface. I took that first big breath and the sun was shining....
Now I'm having a cry,,,,

Maxymoo ... Crying when it is over and finished is better than crying because you cannot bring up the courage to go. You had courage and you are now in a better place. You deserve everything that is good now! Have a big hug.[/QUOTE]
So sorry to hear that you had to experience that. Glad to hear you got out though :hug:

 

[Seeking]

Does anybody else find it a bit strange, if reports are correct, that close family members have all been out and about at the Brookfield Show? GBC and his parents and ABC's parents as well. Personally, I'd be retreating into a sorrowful shell if this happened.

Maybe in the interest of the kids, possibly? But if the report, which was posted in this forum, is true that they were all seen in the bar together, it does suggest that that ABC's mum and dad don't suspect GBC. I just can't understand why they would even want to be in the vicinity of the person who killed their daughter.

Even if it was for the kids' sake, it would be nearly impossible to hold up the appearance of normal activities, going to the show and knowing your daughter's murderer was there.

No theory on this, but just more odd behaviour IMO in what I find a very odd and complex case.

I don't find it odd 4 weeks since she went missing. People do have to get on with their lives. Just because they are out and about doesn't mean that they are not still in deep grief. To do something fun and normal can greatly help with the healing process, take your mind off the pain temporarily and just clear your head. Perhaps Allison was the type of person who would have wanted her family to get on with some happy things soon after this type of tragedy. If I was Allison I would be glad to know that my family could do something fun. No one can change what has happened to her.

 

[mountainhigh]

Is that it?

You can't address any of my other responses or questions?

You come on strong with your opinions, but you obvioulsy can't handle even civil debate or dialogue.

Perhaps that explains why you are so defensive of TM because you do not like confrontation and therefore you understand why she would seek to hide despite your belief that she is innocent.

no , i answered it. just mucked it up. just read thru it, i am sure you will see the parts that differ to yours, but apologies again for it not turning out so well!

now look who's getting critical....hey i love dialogue, do it for a living....

when it comes out that she had nothing to do with this, and it will, i wonder if you or the media will spare her a thought that her life has been turned insidde out as well. what for? just because these rats wanted to sell some print for the likes of you to gobble up..
just not sure being guilty of having an affair with a physco who killed his wife which you actually had nothing to do with means you need to be dragged down with him too.
if you feel differently that's fine...just hope nobody close to you ever needs the media to get off their back for whatver reason...cause it sounds like they won't be able to rely on you...

 

[Paradox11]

I have had dealings with a few people convicted of homicide offences. The ones who were fairly typical people who killed due to extraordinary circumstances or intolerable stresses were all charged relatively quickly. Those who were convicted on circumstantial evidence were all sociopaths and took a long time to catch and charge. They never admitted anything, even the smallest detail, and never felt any internal pressure to provide details to family members, even anonymously after release from prison decades later. It strikes me that this may well have been a killing which involved sociopathic personalities. It has some of the hall marks.

Surely there is a middle ground?

A true sociopath is rare.

 

[Maxymoo]

I don't know how we go about 'I heard from this person or that person', because for the most part, I don't talk to anyone but you guys.....but I used to live there and do have a lot of friends in the area still....one in particular in the hairdressing business has said he beat her all the time...can I say this? you would think after 11 threads, I would be a little bit more internet savvy but, IM NOT

I think you have to put. IMO:banghead:

 

[Hawkins]

An accused in a murder trial in Qld will always be legally represented unless they choose not to be. The consequences of a wrongful conviction are too significant for this not to be the case. LAQ will pay for a suitably qualified barrister. If it did not then a whole host of barristers would offer their services pro bono. It is in nobody's interest for an accused murderer to be unrepresented.

 

[UnfoldingTruth]

Maybe he has told the police informally. Also, would people really listen to him if he came out at this point and defended himself publicly. I actually don't think so. It would just add more fuel for gossip or for him to be mocked. Some people really don't like playing those games. It takes great self control not to respond back but believe it or not some people do choose to act that way. Put a shield around yourself, let the arrows come.....eventually they will stop and maybe expose them self. Keeping quiet can prevent a lot of necessary ugliness though it may be painful to cop the arrows at the time. I am definitely not proclaiming his innocence. I am just presenting other ways that people think. If he is guilty he will be found out, but until then we need to be fair.

He just may not care what the perceived public view of him is anymore.If he is innocent, and he has realized what he has done in terms of affair etc. Then maybe his whole world has crumbled and he couldn't give a flying *advertiser censored**, what the general public thinks of him. ..Then..there is the other way of thinking regarding guilt and numerous other reasons for not speaking up.

 

[AllyG]

Well said. If Allison had been able to leave her marriage earlier, maybe she would still be here today. If we could encourage women to leave their marriage when it gets bad, go, take the kids, get legal support from Women's Legal Services and fix up the legal paperwork as a priority.The dream you imagined is over if you are suffering DV. Don't worry about the earthly possessions - they can be sorted later or you may choose to leave them behind. Your life is more important. You can get financial assistance to start again anyway. We need more available housing for women to leave home and have a short-term stay until the legals and social supports can get sorted.

Not only do women need access to facilities to enable them to leave, but there also needs to be better support for women to be able to stay in the home with the children, while the person who is being violent towards his family is forced to leave. It sucks that the victim is generally the one who needs to pack up and leave, while the perp gets to stay behind and keep all of the things.

 

[Detect]

fair enough. i aslo don't think she had anything to do with this. which is why i don't believe the affair story by the media was very necessary. they know full well its not integral to the case. this was a special interest story only.. printed for the masses to gobble up while eating their sunday bacon and eggs..."oh look at this darl" "oh wow I know her"

I understand what you are saying about his cheating ways etc but I think she is dead because he is what he is...an evil *advertiser censored*er
Millions of men around the world cheat on their wives their whole lives or a good part of it, but they don't go killing their wives...
they either continue to get away with it...
they make a decision to leave their wife...
wife finds out,, kicks em out....
wife finds out and she forgives him (most common)
wife finds out, things go along as per usual, strained relationship...so I kill her! No, not so common..

Love your posts Mountainhigh, however, the Telegraph story says that the police have been back to interview TMc and in para 5 indicates that "the affair has been a focus of investigations". Do you think this is newspaper gossip, or might there be something in the fact that the police have interviewed her on three occasions??

 

[Rudra]

I have just realised that if GBC is charged, and is in as much financial trouble as we are led to believe, he will be entitled to legal aid, and our taxes will be used to defend him. :banghead:

So guilty until proved innocent?

 

[Amee]

Has anyone read the Who magazine? A small piece in there about
ABC. So, so sad. I admire her parents and family so much.

 

[mountainhigh]

"Perhaps that explains why you are so defensive of TM because you do not like confrontation and therefore you understand why she would seek to hide despite your belief that she is innocent"

hey by the way paradox11!

we are all persumed innocent!
its not my belief, its our system,even he is at the moment...

 

[Detect]

Sorry. Link to the Telegraphg story:

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/ne...ague-toni-mchugh/story-e6freuy9-1226361120004

 

[Maxymoo]

Surely there is a middle ground?

A true sociopath is rare.

A murdered wife isn't exactly common place.

 

[Rudra]

I didn't want to say this but I have known men like GBC and women who like philandering 'bad boys'. Sometimes one woman will leave lovebites and/or scratches to mark their lover ... as a message to the other lover/s. And women who have affairs inside organisations usually do it for the pillow talk more than for the sex. It gives them a sense of power.

Yes, I have seen this too. As much as it upset my personal morals. Happens way too much IMO.

 

[Detect]

So guilty until proved innocent?

No, not really, however I can't see the police taking it to court without enough evidence. What I'm trying to say is that we could end up paying for the defence of Allison's killer (if he's found guilty). Happy to pay if he's innocent. Does that make better sense.

 

[Hawkins]

http://www.dsm5.org/Pages/Default.aspx. Some readers might find this a useful resource.

 

[Maxymoo]

:floorlaugh:

Yay.....I thought that very early on. This guy is a sociopath. No guilt???

PS I think I may be in love with you xx

:floorlaugh::floorlaugh:

 

[Straitfan]

Just thinking over this poor guys "odds" lol.....
Ok, so he has/had multiple affairs then his business goes down the *******! (Could be cause sounds like the whole town knows about his "game"! I wouldn't have used him either!) Next his wife is murdered and HE just HAPPENS to be the LAST ONE TO SEE HER! Wonder how many people have those same sucky *** odds??? Probably not to many I would have to guess.

 

[minni]

I think you have to put. IMO:banghead:

thanks Maxymoo!!! (clears throat) IMO GBC beat on his wife all the freaking time