CA CA - Maya Millete, 39, missed daughter's birthday, Chula Vista, 7 Jan 2021 #2

[JakeB911]

Not sure it is allowed to sleuth down a specific possibility. So let me preface this with - completely theorizing potential possibilities as a normal investigator would do with the intent to affirm or dispel a theory.

Pure speculative theory: Uxoricide

There are countless studies attempting to understand the increase of violence, namely the murder of ones wife due to divorce. And the studies are quite fascinating (March & Bourne, 2011; Bourne & Solan, 2012; Bourne et al., 2012, Bourne et al., 2014). In a nutshell, there is a strong correlation with divorce and increased violence that may lead to injury and sometimes death.

Another bit of interesting research is “almost all cases of homicides committed by males against their female partners occurred after the female ended the relationship or announced her intention to do so” (Benzeev, 2014)

But what is the motive you ask? Nearly all male murderers claim that: (a) they committed the murder out of love, and (b) it was a result of loving too much. We accept (a) and reject (b). Wife murder does not express profound love; rather, it is an abusive type of the problematic fusion model of love. (Oxford, 2008).

As a famous football player once said “Let’s say I committed this crime, even if I did, it would have to have been because I loved her very much, right?”

 

[rosesfromangels]

Not sure it is allowed to sleuth down a specific possibility. So let me preface this with - completely theorizing potential possibilities as a normal investigator would do with the intent to affirm or dispel a theory.

Pure speculative theory: Uxoricide

There are countless studies attempting to understand the increase of violence, namely the murder of ones wife due to divorce. And the studies are quite fascinating (March & Bourne, 2011; Bourne & Solan, 2012; Bourne et al., 2012, Bourne et al., 2014). In a nutshell, there is a strong correlation with divorce and increased violence that may lead to injury and sometimes death.

Another bit of interesting research is “almost all cases of homicides committed by males against their female partners occurred after the female ended the relationship or announced her intention to do so” (Benzeev, 2014)

But what is the motive you ask? Nearly all male murderers claim that: (a) they committed the murder out of love, and (b) it was a result of loving too much. We accept (a) and reject (b). Wife murder does not express profound love; rather, it is an abusive type of the problematic fusion model of love. (Oxford, 2008).

As a famous football player once said “Let’s say I committed this crime, even if I did, it would have to have been because I loved her very much, right?”

Jealousy, possessiveness, and control.

amateur opinion and speculation

 

[swedeheart]

They discuss searching the Sand Highway at the Glamis Dunes search. BIL says, "If you're gonna try to hide evidence, that might be one of the better spots to hide something."

BIL says they might have been given a "little hint" that she might have been out there (Glamis Dunes) the day she disappeared, alluding that she might be out there camping. Will search Sand Highway, which is a bit more secluded area.

Search For Missing Chula Vista Mom To Go Beyond San Diego – FOX 5 San Diego




From the Find May FB page:


Find May/Maya Millete

"Fox 5 posed a funny question to lighten the mood and introduce the interview that’s why Maricris managed a smile. She’s in tears most of the time, a smile is good for the soul. Please do not pass judgement, this is a support page for May and her family.
Glamis is another place recently visited by May and family that was suggested (not so much hinted) to look around. This weekend will focus on spreading the news of her disappearance amongst the desert community as well as looking and asking around for anything at all that can lead us to May."

 

[Tealgrove]

Not sure it is allowed to sleuth down a specific possibility. So let me preface this with - completely theorizing potential possibilities as a normal investigator would do with the intent to affirm or dispel a theory.

Pure speculative theory: Uxoricide

There are countless studies attempting to understand the increase of violence, namely the murder of ones wife due to divorce. And the studies are quite fascinating (March & Bourne, 2011; Bourne & Solan, 2012; Bourne et al., 2012, Bourne et al., 2014). In a nutshell, there is a strong correlation with divorce and increased violence that may lead to injury and sometimes death.

Another bit of interesting research is “almost all cases of homicides committed by males against their female partners occurred after the female ended the relationship or announced her intention to do so” (Benzeev, 2014)

But what is the motive you ask? Nearly all male murderers claim that: (a) they committed the murder out of love, and (b) it was a result of loving too much. We accept (a) and reject (b). Wife murder does not express profound love; rather, it is an abusive type of the problematic fusion model of love. (Oxford, 2008).

As a famous football player once said “Let’s say I committed this crime, even if I did, it would have to have been because I loved her very much, right?”

I was just about to post this same thing. Glad you beat me to it because you are much more succinct than I.

I am confused however. Since Day 1 I was under the impression that the marriage was irretrievably broken. They were living separately within the same house.

Based on comments from LM in interviews he alluded to the estrangement and lack of contact or caring. Yet, LM continued to attend family outings and trips albeit, based on noted comments from family, there was discord, fighting and tension.

I really need to understand the dynamic in that house. Were they just experiencing marital problems over the past year or were they truly separated?

Maya’s family called LM out and begged him to help them look for HIS WIFE!

If they were separated, I could understand why he wouldn’t except it would be better if he did.

Why were they still cohabitating? Did Covid cause force this situation?

It sounds like a tense, toxic dynamic in that house and a very stressful situation for everyone-children included. It was a simmering powder keg.

Finally Maya had an appointment with a Divorce Lawyer. Did LM know? Did Maya tell him? Did someone let it slip? Was this a shock? Was LM blindsided? Did LM think there was a chance to save the marriage and then poof all hope was lost?

MOO it is always a dangerous thing to continue to cohabitate with with a spouse when you are intending to divorce.

This is all MOO but I sure would like to know the answers to some of these questions.

 

[JC40]

I was just about to post this same thing. Glad you beat me to it because you are much more succinct than I.

I am confused however. Since Day 1 I was under the impression that the marriage was irretrievably broken. They were living separately within the same house.

Based on comments from LM in interviews he alluded to the estrangement and lack of contact or caring. Yet, LM continued to attend family outings and trips albeit, based on noted comments from family, there was discord, fighting and tension.

I really need to understand the dynamic in that house. Were they just experiencing marital problems over the past year or were they truly separated?

Maya’s family called LM out and begged him to help them look for HIS WIFE!

If they were separated, I could understand why he wouldn’t except it would be better if he did.

Why were they still cohabitating? Did Covid cause force this situation?

It sounds like a tense, toxic dynamic in that house and a very stressful situation for everyone-children included. It was a simmering powder keg.

Finally Maya had an appointment with a Divorce Lawyer. Did LM know? Did Maya tell him? Did someone let it slip? Was this a shock? Was LM blindsided? Did LM think there was a chance to save the marriage and then poof all hope was lost?

MOO it is always a dangerous thing to continue to cohabitate with with a spouse when you are intending to divorce.

This is all MOO but I sure would like to know the answers to some of these questions.

BBM

Great questions!

 

[Baby2Baby]

Y’all...11 hrs! I’m thinkn back to when I was 11 yrs old and attached to my mother basically...those poor girls had to be worried that their mother must be seriously ill. My mother couldn’t even use the restroom without me and my sister pestering her non stop! And then, to think what her brother must have been thinking when the girls told him his sister has been in a locked bedroom for 11 hrs...oh my. A wish and a prayer for May to be found this weekend

 

[Baby2Baby]

Good questions@Tealgrove! Same here! Different scenarios play out in my head. Did he find out about divorce attorney appt and then the argument happened? Did she out right tell him she’s seeking legal action to move forward with divorce, and then the argument happened? Even with all the questions, I do believe there was an argument. I believe the only reason why he told us about the argument is because the children heard it and that was going to come out. All MOO of course

 

[Baby2Baby]

Are there any members who are local to May's case and going to the searches this weekend? Also, I apologize in advance for not knowing this, but what does BBM mean?

 

[Knox]

Are there any members who are local to May's case and going to the searches this weekend? Also, I apologize in advance for not knowing this, but what does BBM mean?

Bolded by Me - used to emphasize a certain portion of the quoted post

 

[Baby2Baby]

Thanx Knox! Still learning to navigate

 

[coastal]

Thanx Knox! Still learning to navigate

Welcome, Baby2Baby!

 

[cvaldez1975]

Maya's family has been very gracious toward LM despite his confusing behavior. They have over 20 years of history with him, and know whether his oddball/awkward remarks are consistent with who he is, or very different.

The one thing that does stand out for me...really stands out....it the description of LM acting "different" at a family gathering and spending a considerable amount of time driving Maya's jeep. Either he was obsessed with the jeep, or doing it to annoy her....or both.

Something really weird about that Jeep fascination that needs an explanation, IMO.

Amateur opinion and speculation

BBM yes i speculated that earlier. that part of their issues could be him taking her things that she valued.

 

[cvaldez1975]

MOO, Maya's family is in a uncomfortable position. JMO, they may seem gracious, but from the beginning they've said they have to let LE investigate the "Red Flags". Care to guess what those are? They're being careful, not quite gracious, IMO. Keeping contact with the children is a priority with them. Urging people to search for Maya is the only thing they can do to not let this case go cold. More attention means the more LE is pressured to keep investigating. I think she needs to be found to take the investigation to the next level. Please know just all my own opinions.

Nothing wrong with hanging on to hope. Again, this is a good way to keep the missing Maya in the news and people knowing about the case. My own thoughts are why would Maya be hitching a ride out there when she left two of her own vehicles in the driveway?


Maya Millete search to continue | cbs8.com
Author: David Gotfredson (Investigative Producer) Updated: 5:42 PM PST February 11, 2021

This investigative producer is one of my favs. He usually digs up interesting facts. Look at all that sand! Where would there be a good spot? Sand!

Watch the video at the 01:16 minute mark.
"Family confirms Millete had set up an app0intment with a divorce lawyer for the Tuesday after she went missing."

All MOO and BBM

hijole, thats the first i had heard of that..... hmmmmmm

 

[cvaldez1975]

Glamis seems like a bad choice to find a spot. MOO
Thanks, even if it was all wheel drive? Not handle that terrain?
I don't see any water or caves at Glamis. Gosh, all I see is sand dunes. I know there's a lake, but does it have water in it? Caves? All I heard about was sand dunes. Anybody even go to Glamis?

Help, can't find water. Imperial Sand Dunes North, Glamis - California Trail Map

glamis was naturally occurring over an ancient lake so i think it doesnt have water, but i could be wrong.

 

[cvaldez1975]

I just watched the video here of their trip to Glamis.
Maya Millete search to continue | cbs8.com
That's Maya on the dirt bike. I think that's her little boy rolling down the sand dune. There's lots of ATVs, jeeps, trucks, campers, but I think a Lexus on a mission would stand out for sure. Like you said, probably get stuck in the sand. Yikes, that's all I see is sand and dryness. They're going to search the "Sand Highway". MOO, I just can't imagine they'll find her there.

if he put her there it was out of the way. but i think they are going to sand highway to give out flyers to those ATV-ing out there in hopes THEY might join the search or at least be on the lookout for anything funky.

 

[cvaldez1975]

Right, a sedan isn’t high enough off the ground, not enough clearance in under carriage.

When I mentioned caves, I didn’t mean Glamis, but any of the surrounding area near Chula.

Amateur opinion and speculation

it is a lexus SUV i believe.

 

[Curious Me]

BIL says they might have been given a "little hint" that she might have been out there (Glamis Dunes) the day she disappeared, alluding that she might be out there camping. Will search Sand Highway, which is a bit more secluded area.

Who gave them that hint? LE? Did they get it from us discussing it here? At 0:36 BIL talks about that "little hint", admits it is a LONG SHOT , and I think he means that Maya's still out there camping. Sister later talks about the 6 wks., "and if she was out there camping", they wouldn't know what to say. Her sister said from the start Maya would not leave her children, not leave on her daughter's birthday. So, MOO, I don't think they believe she'd be still camping. Didn't even take her jeep or dirt bike, or use her credit card. MOO, I'll say it again, if they're looking out there, IMO, it's not to find Maya alive and camping.

Bless her strong, loving family. Of course, they still have HOPE. They are facing this head on and with courage. They know they have to brace themselves, but there's still that hope.

BIL says, "If you're gonna try to hide evidence, that might be one of the better spots to hide something."

Thank You dear @swedeheart for finding and posting this video. I'll re-post it below. BIL says that at the 01:55 mark. We all know that Friday may have been the day to hide something. BBM and MOO

 

[Curious Me]

Let's go over what we know at this point.

• The families went to Glamis over the New Year's weekend. Sister and BIL last saw Maya there on Jan. 3rd. LM was acting different and kept driving Maya's jeep.
• Back home on Jan. 7th, Thursday evening, the couple has an argument and Maya goes missing. Not reported missing until her family showed up Saturday suspecting something was wrong.
• We now know she had an appointment with a Divorce lawyer on Jan. 12th, but by then she was already missing.

"Family confirms Millete had set up an app0intment with a divorce lawyer for the Tuesday after she went missing."
Maya Millete search to continue | cbs8.com

Jealousy, possessiveness, and control.

and sometimes greed or financial concerns.

Finally Maya had an appointment with a Divorce Lawyer. Did LM know? Did Maya tell him? Did someone let it slip? Was this a shock? Was LM blindsided? Did LM think there was a chance to save the marriage and then poof all hope was lost?

Good questions. We could probably make a long list of times this has happened. Women always seem to disappear after an appt. with a divorce attorney. At first, many thought Maya took off and left her family. That could still be a possibility. I don't know what happened to Maya, if it was planned or happened spur of the moment whatever did happen.

As a couple, they seemed to have it all. I think they both knew it was coming to an end. Both parties would have to fight for custody, belongings, child support, perhaps alimony, etc., It had become somewhat of a nasty game they were both playing, I suspect, because LM said he thought MM "upped her game".

Also, as @BlkMtnGirl said, "it was a jeep thing" out there in Glamis when LM kept taking Maya's jeep to drive when she wanted to drive it and they couldn't even ride together per Daily Mail article.

MOO, the word "divorce" can hit someone like the end of the world, and in a way it is the end of life as someone knew it. MOO, a reminder here, there's agencies and help to safely leave a relationship that has gone toxic. It's best to take precautions beforehand.

 

[Curious Me]

there’s a famous saying: “It’s a Jeep thing.

I did not know this.

 

[kkccoo11]

"Family confirms Millete had set up an app0intment with a divorce lawyer for the Tuesday after she went missing."

I had a very bad feeling after seeing this. Hope I am wrong.