CA CA - Maya Millete, 39, missed daughter's birthday, Chula Vista, 7 Jan 2021 #4 *husband arrested*

[love_and_protect]

edited to remove double quote, my computer is losing it today....

What ever happened to the uncle and aunt? At one point there was speculation that they were (allegedly) helping LM in some way. any additional info on that? Perhaps they will be witnesses? Anyone know?

Amateur opinion and speculation

At the police briefing after his arrest, someone asked at the end if they had any information that his family might have been involved and the answer from CVPD was a very resounding "LM is the only one we are looking at as involved in the disappearance and murder of MM". But, the District Attorney made a very passioned plea for anyone who may have been too scared to come forward before to feel safe to come forward now that he was in jail, and repeated it multiple times. I think they are hoping someone will speak up now. But the aunt and uncle showing up in the middle of the night, cleaning with bleach, taking that freezer.... all AWFUL coincidental given what he was just charged with. :/ <modsnip: Sleuthing family is not allowed> Such a mess

 

[Marysmith]

edited to remove double quote, my computer is losing it today....




At the police briefing after his arrest, someone asked at the end if they had any information that his family might have been involved and the answer from CVPD was a very resounding "LM is the only one we are looking at as involved in the disappearance and murder of MM". But, the District Attorney made a very passioned plea for anyone who may have been too scared to come forward before to feel safe to come forward now that he was in jail, and repeated it multiple times. I think they are hoping someone will speak up now. But the aunt and uncle showing up in the middle of the night, cleaning with bleach, taking that freezer.... all AWFUL coincidental given what he was just charged with. :/ <modsnip: Sleuthing family is not allowed> Such a mess

What?! Ugh. Yes, very coincidental IMO.

 

[slowpoke]

Is that gang still active? Could he maybe be feeling "safe" because of those ties from when he was a teen?

I am assuming that gang still may be active, based on this, from the article:

“Now age 41, the stabbing victim appeared in court on Monday in San Diego County for a preliminary hearing, as part of an unrelated, attempted kidnapping case.

News 8 has been following the man's case but is not identifying him because he could be targeted by rival gang members, even though the stabbing happened 24 years ago.” Maya Millete’s husband arrested as juvenile in 1997 ‘gang related’ stabbing | cbs8.com

Could LM still be affiliated with the gang?

 

[PaulaDC]

So the children are with Larry's parents and not with Maya's family as was stated earlier today?

Can Maya's family get to see the children now that Larry is in jail and charged? What's the procedure?
Those poor children have been so traumatized by all this, lied to by their father etc.....they need serious professional support and counseling.

In our state of FL, grandparents can get rights for visitation once the parents are incarcerated. In this case I would think being there is only one parent that the family will get visitation now LM arrest. Also "possession" is 9/10s of the law and in cases like this unless there is abuse of the children the judge will more than likely leave them put. By the time this gets into the courts and check ups with social services, unless LM parents are unfit they will probably become guardians. Just moo based on us becoming grandparent guardians.

 

[Curious Me]

...But the aunt and uncle showing up in the middle of the night, cleaning with bleach, taking that freezer....

Thanks for voicing what's been on my mind. Always remember there really was a freezer in this case. I truly believe there was help of some kind, and not sure if LM really went on that day trip to hide the body, maybe it was a diversion. Anyways, if others weren't involved in the act of clean up / disposal, then I am almost positive those others know the whole story and probably where to find Maya. LM needed to talk and who better than relatives like them. All my own speculations though.

 

[LindsayXO]

It would be amazing if Maya was found before his trial! I hope that now that he's incarcerated, people will come forward and help find her!

I was thinking about how Larry input his home address from 2.5 hrs away and I find it a bit odd. It's not unusual to use a GPS when you're hours away from home, but you'd think if he was near a main road or town, he could just read a road sign. He left his phone at home so he knows technology could be used to track him, so why use your GPS if it's possible to track? Maybe I'm giving him too much credit but you'd think it would have crossed his mind at some point. He lives in the San Diego Metropolitan area. Surely, even signs 2.5 hours away will tell him how to get there, right? Could he not do it the old fashioned way?

I need a local to weigh in as I don't know the area. It's a lot less densely populated here in Canada and our road signs will tell you the nearest city when it's 3 hours away.

I also wonder if Larry input his home address just to find his way back into a main road and it was the first address in his GPS. His tires were apparently a bit low when he returned so maybe he was doing a bit of off roading. Would Larry need to use his GPS to find his way back from Glamis since he's already been there before? Or maybe he was nearby Glamis but at the Salton Sea? Was Larry always dependant on GPS? Was it a habit of his to use it or only when he needed it? So many unanswered questions that I'll probably never get an answer for...

I know I'm not being helpful but I just want her found. I feel like the GPS is the key but there are just too many factors involved. I was mostly hoping that by putting my thoughts out here on this platform, someone much smarter than I am could use it as a jumping off point.

Sorry for the brain dump. My mind is out of control today. MOO

 

[Acorunadepor]

Thanks for voicing what's been on my mind. Always remember there really was a freezer in this case. I truly believe there was help of some kind, and not sure if LM really went on that day trip to hide the body, maybe it was a diversion. Anyways, if others weren't involved in the act of clean up / disposal, then I am almost positive those others know the whole story and probably where to find Maya. LM needed to talk and who better than relatives like them. All my own speculations though.

If you see the texts he was sending to his boss. He was clearly in complete disarray about her wanting a divorce from him. I mean that was to his boss, just imagine to communication towards a close relative.

A lot of the metoo movement (not the #MeToo, also important but not what I am referring to) involved women in certain groups with a specific background whom endured physical, mental and sexual abuse from their husbands. But could not or would not file for a divorce because of values regarding marriage and family within their group or culture.

For him it was all about saving his face. So the story of him being the victim probably was played out for a long time. In 2020 he sent hundreds of text messages to family and friends regarding him suspecting her having an affair. Coupled with a certain cultural background makes his story sound in line with historical behavior of a large part of men within these groups. This is by the way not an excuse I am constructing here for him to act the way he does. Its disgusting. Also in most cases behavior of these men does not result in women being a murder victim, but the lifelong suffering must be brutal. More saddening is the fact that in most cases the abuse stays within the confinements of the family or worse just the household.

Compartmentalizing his side of the marriage in order the regain control over her (and the kids) or the strengthen his control. He is protecting the children, she is not, he is raising them, she is having an affair, etc. For me the part of him driving in her car, and ''having so much fun'' according to her sister, in the on the months leading up to her disappearances tells a story on its own.

 

[cvaldez1975]

LEXUS WITH THE VANITY PLATES LM TOOK ON LONG DAY TRIP ON JAN. 8, 2021

Not sure we ever saw a pic of the vanity license plate on the back of the Lexus, but I do believe I saw it spelled out in news articles as "MAYLANI", the "May" seems likely, but your spelling sounds possible too. I tried to find the news articles, but they change with time. Anyways, like I said, LE needs to get the pic of the Lexus with the vanity plates out there to jog people's memories of Jan. 8, 2021 seeing it parked someplace when LM took that looong all day trip,

i just copy and pasted lol... hopefully the news article updated it.

 

[lapsang1]

It would be amazing if Maya was found before his trial! I hope that now that he's incarcerated, people will come forward and help find her!

I was thinking about how Larry input his home address from 2.5 hrs away and I find it a bit odd. It's not unusual to use a GPS when you're hours away from home, but you'd think if he was near a main road or town, he could just read a road sign. He left his phone at home so he knows technology could be used to track him, so why use your GPS if it's possible to track? Maybe I'm giving him too much credit but you'd think it would have crossed his mind at some point. He lives in the San Diego Metropolitan area. Surely, even signs 2.5 hours away will tell him how to get there, right? Could he not do it the old fashioned way?

I need a local to weigh in as I don't know the area. It's a lot less densely populated here in Canada and our road signs will tell you the nearest city when it's 3 hours away.

I also wonder if Larry input his home address just to find his way back into a main road and it was the first address in his GPS. His tires were apparently a bit low when he returned so maybe he was doing a bit of off roading. Would Larry need to use his GPS to find his way back from Glamis since he's already been there before? Or maybe he was nearby Glamis but at the Salton Sea? Was Larry always dependant on GPS? Was it a habit of his to use it or only when he needed it? So many unanswered questions that I'll probably never get an answer for...

I know I'm not being helpful but I just want her found. I feel like the GPS is the key but there are just too many factors involved. I was mostly hoping that by putting my thoughts out here on this platform, someone much smarter than I am could use it as a jumping off point.

Sorry for the brain dump. My mind is out of control today. MOO

Good point, I'm local and am at a loss why he would activate that, it's very obvious what major freeways there are and how to get back to Chula Vista. If one supposes he's in the desert and just needed directions back to interstate...1) many of those "roads" in the desert are off road vehicle and most don't show up in standard GPS maps and 2) if they've spent time in the dessert before, which they had, he should have known his way around. I've spent lots of time out in those desserts and generally if you have no idea what specific road your on it's pretty much just head in any direction (e.g. south) and you eventually hit a main road...

 

[coastal]

I can't find any information on Bonita Martinez's past cases. Wondering about her background and expertise as a criminal defense attorney.

I can't speak to her background or expertise, but she did say this:

Larry Millete's attorney Bonita Martinez said, in a phone interview with News 8, that her client is "a decent loving man" and "he's not a suspect, not even a person of interest". She also said Maya Millete "may be alive" and "she is probably in Hawaii".

FWIW

Link to News 8 video:

 

[cvaldez1975]

Maya was in a domestic abuse situation. Larry did try to choke her once.

New details from arrest warrant for Larry Millete | cbs8.com

The pdf file: millette-arrest-warrant.pdf (cbs8.com)

from the link (MAY SAID) - "She replied: "How about maybe you focus on also what women want from their husbands? All these things you send me are just about you which further solidifies the whole idea that you really think I'm the problem and that if you could only fix me everything will be ok."

UUUFFFF cant see ole lar taking that one well.

 

[Curious Me]

...not sure if LM really went on that day trip to hide the body, maybe it was a diversion.

...I was thinking about how Larry input his home address from 2.5 hrs away and I find it a bit odd. It's not unusual to use a GPS when you're hours away from home, but you'd think if he was near a main road or town, he could just read a road sign. He left his phone at home so he knows technology could be used to track him, so why use your GPS...

...Good point, I'm local and am at a loss why he would activate that, it's very obvious what major freeways there are and how to get back to Chula Vista. If one supposes he's in the desert and just needed directions back to interstate...1) many of those "roads" in the desert are off road vehicle and most don't show up in standard GPS maps...

Just glad to see there's others that find the new info that he actually used his GPS on that important trip to be an odd fact shared from the investigation. How tricky of a person is LM? He left his phone at home, but then goes and used the GPS knowing full well that's what LE would check? We have discussed the freezer being picked up. We've discussed the possibility of someone else actually taking the body to hide, and perhaps this was an attempt at adding a bit of fake, tricky, detour evidence to make it look like he was on that long day trip to hide the body when, in fact, someone else helped and went in another direction. It just seems very odd that LM would not know how to head for home. Well, I'm sure LE knows more. They have only shared some of the safer evidence that won't jeopardize the trial.

 

[Marysmith]

Just glad to see there's others that find the new info that he actually used his GPS on that important trip to be an odd fact shared from the investigation. How tricky of a person is LM? He left his phone at home, but then goes and used the GPS knowing full well that's what LE would check? We have discussed the freezer being picked up. We've discussed the possibility of someone else actually taking the body to hide, and perhaps this was an attempt at adding a bit of fake, tricky, detour evidence to make it look like he was on that long day trip to hide the body when, in fact, someone else helped and went in another direction. It just seems very odd that LM would not know how to head for home. Well, I'm sure LE knows more. They have only shared some of the safer evidence that won't jeopardize the trial.

Yes, I hear y’all. Realistically if he was gone for 11 hours he could have gone hours in another direction and back to the point where he put the GPS on…

 

[WellThen]

Yes, I hear y’all. Realistically if he was gone for 11 hours he could have gone hours in another direction and back to the point where he put the GPS on…

This is what I'm thinking also. I believe the 2.5 hours could represent the minimum time/distance he traveled each way. So, 11.5 -5 hours = 6.5 hours to travel a bit further and hide/destroy the body.

 

[Marysmith]

This is what I'm thinking also. I believe the 2.5 hours could represent the minimum time/distance he traveled each way. So, 11.5 -5 hours = 6.5 hours to travel a bit further and hide/destroy the body.

Yeah… HUGE area is possible… and it could be so close too. How awful for her loved ones.

 

[Curious Me]

If you see the texts he was sending to his boss. He was clearly in complete disarray about her wanting a divorce from him. I mean that was to his boss, just imagine to communication towards a close relative...

This is MOO and only how I see it from my standpoint. Maya had been married to him a long time. She gave him too much credit to eventually be able to handle a divorce maturely, perhaps have shared custody of the children, and live separately but get along for the sake of the children. To eventually move on perhaps to other relationships.

Most likely, from what has been alluded to by many sources, she was involved to some extent with another. We may find out more about that in the future. LM didn't just tell his own boss she wanted a divorce, but showed up at Maya's work place insinuating she was having an affair with someone perhaps from work. The tension had been building especially from Sept. 2020 to Jan. 2021.

Maya gave LM credit when, IMO, he was pretty far bonkers with his spell casting and all. She just wanted to have the birthday celebration for her daughter, then see the divorce attorney the following week. Yes, she was afraid of him, but she didn't realize he was going to go to the max of jealousy and possession.


I wish he did not find out about the appointment with the divorce attorney. Certainly I'm not blaming any victims, but there are ways to protect yourself when leaving an abusive relationship, and all woman should consider how to protect themselves before they leave. It's the most dangerous time. She thought LM was mature and sane when here he was burning candles and wishing her broken bones and harm. The main thing now is to find Maya and ensure Justice is done for her.

 

[Marysmith]

This is MOO and only how I see it from my standpoint. Maya had been married to him a long time. She gave him too much credit to eventually be able to handle a divorce maturely, perhaps have shared custody of the children, and live separately but get along for the sake of the children. To eventually move on perhaps to other relationships.

Most likely, from what has been alluded to by many sources, she was involved to some extent with another. We may find out more about that in the future. LM didn't just tell his own boss she wanted a divorce, but showed up at Maya's work place insinuating she was having an affair with someone perhaps from work. The tension had been building especially from Sept. 2020 to Jan. 2021.

Maya gave LM credit when, IMO, he was pretty far bonkers with his spell casting and all. She just wanted to have the birthday celebration for her daughter, then see the divorce attorney the following week. Yes, she was afraid of him, but she didn't realize he was going to go to the max of jealousy and possession.


I wish he did not find out about the appointment with the divorce attorney. Certainly I'm not blaming any victims, but there are ways to protect yourself when leaving an abusive relationship, and all woman should consider how to protect themselves before they leave. It's the most dangerous time. She thought LM was mature and sane when here he was burning candles and wishing her broken bones and harm. The main thing now is to find Maya and ensure Justice is done for her.

In what way though do you think she could have left him safely with 3 children involved and future custody at stake? I’m sorry but I don’t see how she could have. I feel horrible for Maya. Even if she got to the appointment without him knowing and filed for divorce she would have continued to be in severe danger. I went through the same thing and there but for, I don’t even know honestly, I would have been Maya. If I had to do it over again I would have never thought about leaving until I had no child under 18. There are some very dangerous and obsessed people out there. It’s not okay at all but I just feel that there is almost no safe way out for some people. There are literally trapped.
IMO and I can’t speak for Maya but I feel like at a certain point in some abusive relationships you will be punished if you stay or go.

 

[Curious Me]

In what way though do you think she could have left him safely with 3 children involved and future custody at stake? I’m sorry but I don’t see how she could have. I feel horrible for Maya....

Excellent, truthful post @Marysmith. I've been thinking hard on what steps Maya could've taken to get out safely, not be accused of deserting or leaving without the children, and still pull it off when she could go through a divorce safely. I know how it is and maybe just got lucky I got away alive. Emotions in divorce are super ugly and volatile. I have no idea how Maya could've done it because it looks almost impossible with someone like LM and all his family's involvement with the children too.

...There are some very dangerous and obsessed people out there. It’s not okay at all but I just feel that there is almost no safe way out for some people. There are literally trapped. IMO and I can’t speak for Maya but I feel like at a certain point in some abusive relationships you will be punished if you stay or go.

I want to acknowledge I definitely understand what you're saying. I feel horrible for Maya's situation too. By the time a woman is ready to leave, she's gathering her own defiance and strength and that can be a dangerous thing. Sometimes there's someone else she's involved with but not always. She just wants out. How long can she keep stuffing her own feelings away. Maya was absolutely a vibrant, light filled, exuberant woman.

Was she going to have to force herself to stay and put up with all LM's controlling, irrational behaviors until the children were grown? What you're saying is there's no guarantee either way staying or leaving that she'll be safe. Maya would've had to stay with LM another 14 yrs. for the youngest to be 18. LM was dangerous to live with for another 14 yrs.

I've talked about a case here mentioning the freezer. Elizabeth Sullivan went to see a divorce attorney the same day she disappeared. Once the plans get thrown out there in a volatile argument, it gets often deadly. So, hope I don't sound like a fool in believing a safe exit might be possible.

I don't have all the answers. Nothing I say may have saved Maya. I'm sure it's may not be possible to escape safely in some abusive relationships. (I've had my share.) It's following so many cases here and on the news that makes me want to suggest getting help planning a safe exit. There's professional people, counselors, and organizations that can help in the planning. You can try marriage counseling, and that may help determine if the spouse will be able to handle a divorce amicably. If it comes down to leaving a dangerous situation, then just don't flaunt your plans. Don't challenge a mad man. Everything should be kept on the "down low". Keep him in the dark and don't give him fuel or time to have his own nasty plans.

Please know this post is all MOO and thoughts.

 

[rosesfromangels]

The post from Curious Me offers sound advice, which is *seek professional help* for a domestic situation. Domestic violence/homicide is an epidemic in the U.S.

After years of study and observation on this issue, i have come to the conclusion that while additional laws and programs and so forth need to be put in to place, the real solve is to raise strong women. Women who are cherished and value themselves, and will immediately banish anyone from their lives that show any sign of being an abuser. First strike; you're out. No second or third chances. We must treat women to value themselves.

In Maya's case, it's hard to know when the abuse started. LM's mind seems as if it had become so bitter, and warped.

Amateur opinion and speculation

 

[Marysmith]

Excellent, truthful post @Marysmith. I've been thinking hard on what steps Maya could've taken to get out safely, not be accused of deserting or leaving without the children, and still pull it off when she could go through a divorce safely. I know how it is and maybe just got lucky I got away alive. Emotions in divorce are super ugly and volatile. I have no idea how Maya could've done it because it looks almost impossible with someone like LM and all his family's involvement with the children too.
I want to acknowledge I definitely understand what you're saying. I feel horrible for Maya's situation too. By the time a woman is ready to leave, she's gathering her own defiance and strength and that can be a dangerous thing. Sometimes there's someone else she's involved with but not always. She just wants out. How long can she keep stuffing her own feelings away. Maya was absolutely a vibrant, light filled, exuberant woman.

Was she going to have to force herself to stay and put up with all LM's controlling, irrational behaviors until the children were grown? What you're saying is there's no guarantee either way staying or leaving that she'll be safe. Maya would've had to stay with LM another 14 yrs. for the youngest to be 18. LM was dangerous to live with for another 14 yrs.

I've talked about a case here mentioning the freezer. Elizabeth Sullivan went to see a divorce attorney the same day she disappeared. Once the plans get thrown out there in a volatile argument, it gets often deadly. So, hope I don't sound like a fool in believing a safe exit might be possible.

I don't have all the answers. Nothing I say may have saved Maya. I'm sure it's may not be possible to escape safely in some abusive relationships. (I've had my share.) It's following so many cases here and on the news that makes me want to suggest getting help planning a safe exit. There's professional people, counselors, and organizations that can help in the planning. You can try marriage counseling, and that may help determine if the spouse will be able to handle a divorce amicably. If it comes down to leaving a dangerous situation, then just don't flaunt your plans. Don't challenge a mad man. Everything should be kept on the "down low". Keep him in the dark and don't give him fuel or time to have his own nasty plans.

Please know this post is all MOO and thoughts.

Maya and Larry met in high school. So young.
I don’t have the answer either. I wish there was an easy one. I think early intervention and teaching children and adolescents about healthy relationships would help though.