CA CA - Maya Millete, 39, missed daughter's birthday, Chula Vista, 7 Jan 2021

[Lusitana]

One of my concerns early was about the children being heavily coached and manipulated. I also highly doubt that those poor kids are allowed to talk to anyone freely and on their own, I’m pretty sure they have “Big Brother” watching them at all times.

I wonder what if anything did the 11-year-old say about the case and her mom at the vigil/search she attended. I’m actually still surprised that she was allowed to attend.

 

[Curious Me]

One of my concerns early was about the children being heavily coached and manipulated. I also highly doubt that those poor kids are allowed to talk to anyone freely and on their own, I’m pretty sure they have “Big Brother” watching them at all times.

I wonder what if anything did the 11-year-old say about the case and her mom at the vigil/search she attended. I’m actually still surprised that she was allowed to attend.

<modsnip>
Find May/Maya Millete | Facebook
Then, on a news video Maya's sister mentioned LM's family not taking part in the searches either.

Watch the video below, and at the 0.54 minute mark Marichris says, "It's been heavy on us, for him not even his family to offers any support, you know, in finding my sister." No help in the search and then she finds out he retained an attorney.

Search Continues for Missing Chula Vista Mom
February 5, 2021

 

[BeachSky]

<modsnip>
Find May/Maya Millete | Facebook
Then, on a news video Maya's sister mentioned LM's family not taking part in the searches either.

Watch the video below, and at the 0.54 minute mark Marichris says, "It's been heavy on us, for him not even his family to offers any support, you know, in finding my sister." No help in the search and then she finds out he retained an attorney.

Search Continues for Missing Chula Vista Mom
February 5, 2021

This is just heartbreaking.

 

[JakeB911]

I think I’m starting to understand the guidelines for posting here. And thanks all for the private messages and sharing your tips. In doing this for so long, one thing you start to get numb to is the feelings and perspectives of the victim.

Watched the press conference the other day. Personally, was hoping the department had a break through and was going to share their great news with the public. But disappointedly, it was the complete opposite. They were pleading for the public’s help.

one thing that stood out was the departments comments that “we have information we can’t share” which definitely indicates they have a “party of interest” but with limited conclusive evidence. Evidence that couldn’t justify anything more than a search warrant.

I truly hope the 100s of hours of video surveillance turns up something. This is quite heartbreaking.

 

[NoSI]

Hi All… Have not commented on this thread, but have been reading along from the beginning. I am sitting on my hands. I think the person that shall remained unnamed has a lot of animosity toward MM. It’s plain to see that there likely was emotional abuse. Based on several interviews, there seems to be lots of criticism and degrading towards MM. Can you imagine what this may have looked like behind closed doors? I have a hard time staying within TOS… so I better stop myself now…

I really do hope that it is not going this way, but am definitely concerned that it will.

 

[rosesfromangels]

Hi All… Have not commented on this thread, but have been reading along from the beginning. I am sitting on my hands. I think the person that shall remained unnamed has a lot of animosity toward MM. It’s plain to see that there likely was emotional abuse. Based on several interviews, there seems to be lots of criticism and degrading towards MM. Can you imagine what this may have looked like behind closed doors? I have a hard time staying within TOS… so I better stop myself now…

I really do hope that it is not going this way, but am definitely concerned that it will.

From the outside looking in, and with the little info we have, it certainly does seem there was a fair amount of discord, and this is by the husband's own admission per statements he has given. Now that being said, from the reports of MM's social life, it doesn't sound as if whatever discord there was stopped her from having a very full social life, that apparently didn't include the hubby.

Some folks are homebodies, and some folks are social butterflies. This dynamic can work just fine as long as the couple is in agreement. There is a difference between doing things we love (that our partner doesn't) independently, vs. a complete fracture and disinterest in our Partner altogether. I think that for some folks what worked when they married young, no longer may work at middle age. It's sad, but we see this dynamic frequently, and it's especially sad when children are involved.

But the dynamic I describe is sadly commonplace, and very rarely results in homicide. Without any info from LE, I continue to give the husband the benefit of the doubt until and *if* such time as we have anything definitive that points to him.

Amateur opinion and speculation

 

[NoSI]

From the outside looking in, and with the little info we have, it certainly does seem there was a fair amount of discord, and this is by the husband's own admission per statements he has given. Now that being said, from the reports of MM's social life, it doesn't sound as if whatever discord there was stopped her from having a very full social life, that apparently didn't include the hubby.

Some folks are homebodies, and some folks are social butterflies. This dynamic can work just fine as long as the couple is in agreement. There is a difference between doing things we love (that our partner doesn't) independently, vs. a complete fracture and disinterest in our Partner altogether. I think that for some folks what worked when they married young, no longer may work at middle age. It's sad, but we see this dynamic frequently, and it's especially sad when children are involved.

But the dynamic I describe is sadly commonplace, and very rarely results in homicide. Without any info from LE, I continue to give the husband the benefit of the doubt until and *if* such time as we have anything definitive that points to him.

Amateur opinion and speculation

I totally appreciate your viewpoint and agree with you. We are all different, enjoy different things, and respond differently to stressors. Longtime partners can change, grow apart, fall out of love… This is commonplace and does not result in homicide, most of the time. In my professional life, I interview/assess a lot of individuals that struggle with trauma/PTSD. What I have learned is that violence often escalates. This can happen in a gradual or sudden manner. Sudden escalation where verbal threats escalate to physical violence is very dangerous… And physical violence can lead to tragedy... sometimes unintended.

I am not saying that this is what happened here. But there is just something about the way he talks about MM, that is concerning to me. She wants space, he doesn’t… She stays out to the wee hours of the morning drinking, spends here time hiking, participates in a jeep club, work is her life… It just paints her in a less than favorable light while she is a missing person... It's almost like he is portraying himself as the victim, which we have seen before.

Like I said, I really hope this is not what happened. I really appreciate that you give him the benefit of the doubt. I will try to do the same.

 

[slowpoke]

Human remains in East County appear unrelated to missing mom | cbs8.com

from the link: (bolded by me)
“Larry Millete told officers he drove his four-year-old son to the beach in the Lexus on that Friday, according to family members, who also said they tried unsuccessfully that day to reach the husband on his cell phone.

“They left at 6:30 a.m. in the morning to go to Solana Beach and they didn't come back until about 5 p.m. in the afternoon,” Drouaillet said.”

Was this a preplanned trip? That was a long time away from home and a long time to be unavailable by phone. If Maya was not actually behind the locked bedroom door (which appears likely), then he left his girls alone at the house. I don’t like the sound of this.
MOO

 

[Lusitana]

Human remains in East County appear unrelated to missing mom | cbs8.com

from the link: (bolded by me)
“Larry Millete told officers he drove his four-year-old son to the beach in the Lexus on that Friday, according to family members, who also said they tried unsuccessfully that day to reach the husband on his cell phone.

“They left at 6:30 a.m. in the morning to go to Solana Beach and they didn't come back until about 5 p.m. in the afternoon,” Drouaillet said.”

Was this a preplanned trip? That was a long time away from home and a long time to be unavailable by phone. If Maya was not actually behind the locked bedroom door (which appears likely), then he left his girls alone at the house. I don’t like the sound of this.
MOO

So, those poor girls were home alone, without knowing where either parent was the whole day? Also, who goes on a nearly 6 hour beach trip with a 3/4-year-old kid? Is it even possible to keep a kid that young happy from 6:30 A.M. until 5 P.M.?

The drive is less than a hour. Aren't there a bunch of other nice beaches around Chula Vista, though? It's San Diego.

 

[Sunrisenow]

Mother-of-three who's been missing for a month had 'no positive communication' with her husband | Daily Mail Online

 

[Curious Me]

There were more peaceful rallies planned for today at three different locations. Times and locations listed.
This is love what you see from Maya's family.

Find May/Maya Millete | Facebook
Maya Millete | Facebook

I see another pic of the couple with their children taken fairly recently. They still did things together. Twenty one years together is a long time. People change, but some shred of love usually remains.

MOO, this is all MOO. The daughters are old enough to have their own thoughts and observations of what occurred. They must be aware of all the searches and rallies going on to find their mother. They know their father has drawn attention to himself by not attending any of these events. Why he and his side of the family can't show even fake concern that Maya is missing makes everyone wonder. Daughters probably love their Daddy, and they don't want to lose him too. What are they being told about this whole situation?

Sure, it's possible a stranger abducted Maya... and years from now, the children are going to remember how little concern was shown by their father, and what he said about her. They'll remember how they maybe weren't allowed to be with Maya's family in this time when they all need to be together. They miss their mother, they want their mother to be found, they want Maya to come home. It appears they have been put in an awkward situation. I'm just voicing my own concerns here. I can't stop worrying about the children and how this will affect them. All my own thoughts and opinions.

 

[Curious Me]

Human remains in East County appear unrelated to missing mom | cbs8.com

from the link: (bolded by me)
“Larry Millete told officers he drove his four-year-old son to the beach in the Lexus on that Friday, according to family members, who also said they tried unsuccessfully that day to reach the husband on his cell phone.

“They left at 6:30 a.m. in the morning to go to Solana Beach and they didn't come back until about 5 p.m. in the afternoon,” Drouaillet said.”

Was this a preplanned trip? That was a long time away from home and a long time to be unavailable by phone. If Maya was not actually behind the locked bedroom door (which appears likely), then he left his girls alone at the house. I don’t like the sound of this.
MOO

Thank You @slowpoke for finding it. So, it was true! Not a rumor. LM really did take off to the beach with his son the day after he had that argument with missing Maya.

Human remains in East County appear unrelated to missing mom | cbs8.com
This bears repeating:
"Officers also impounded a black Lexus SUV, which the husband was believed to be driving on Friday, January 8, the day after Millete was last seen, according to family members. The SUV had a personalized license plate, MAYLANI."

"Larry Millete told officers he drove his four-year-old son to the beach in the Lexus on that Friday, according to family members, who also said they tried unsuccessfully that day to reach the husband on his cell phone."

“They left at 6:30 a.m. in the morning to go to Solana Beach and they didn't come back until about 5 p.m. in the afternoon,” Drouaillet said."

 

[Curious Me]

Mother-of-three who's been missing for a month had 'no positive communication' with her husband | Daily Mail Online

Thank You @Sunrisenow. Oh boy, the Daily Mail now, usually good pics. This article is quite interesting. We're starting to get bits and pieces of info about the failing marriage. This tells some of what they argued about.

"Maricris Drouaillet and her husband, Richard, said that Larry and Maya 'May' Millete had been arguing over a Jeep Wrangler that they had brought with them on a family camping trip to the Glamis Sand Dunes in California over the New Year holiday."

Mother-of-three who's been missing for a month had 'no positive communication' with her husband | Daily Mail Online

"Both Richard and Miracris noted that Larry had been having a lot of fun with the Jeep Wrangler, which had been purchased by the mother."

'He was having more fun than my sister considering it was my sister's Jeep,' Miracris said. 'He wanted to take the Jeep and he wanted to drive it and my sister wanted to drive it. So they had been arguing about that.'

"Richard added: 'You would think that they would have ridden together but that never happened. The relationship was done. She wanted to get out of the relationship."

 

[whitelilac]

So he did go to the beach with the 4 year old. Gone for 10 1/2 hours. They weren't at the beach for 9 some hours, so where else did they go? And though everyone is different, who leaves the house at 6:30 am on a free day?

Not reachable by phone......what if there was an emergency at home? or a need to discuss the impending birthday party in Big Bear?

I'm not so ok with this.

 

[Sunrisenow]

Missing California mother's family sends new message to husband: 'Come and help us find your wife'

 

[MrsWatson]

This is not sounding promising at all. Too many red flags.
Heartbreaking, it's clear she has a very close and loving family.

 

[Curious Me]

Missing California mother's family sends new message to husband: 'Come and help us find your wife'

Maya knew how to work on a dirt bike? You always see her with her children. I felt like crying looking at those pics. No, it doesn't look like this is going to end happy for those children. The husband can't even pretend an insincere concern.

Heard that besides the peaceful rallies, that they might be planning to all drive by the Millete home. That concerns me. The children still live there. Remember husband used the phrase "mind numbing" in his phone interview? MOO, he does seem numb, but maybe he's just blocking it out. What happened to Maya after that argument? She was never seen again, and he went to the beach?

 

[Curious Me]

...Without any info from LE, I continue to give the husband the benefit of the doubt until and *if* such time as we have anything definitive that points to him.

...Like I said, I really hope this is not what happened. I really appreciate that you give him the benefit of the doubt. I will try to do the same.

I posted this before because I struggle trying to give someone the benefit of the doubt. MOO, in reality, it is what it is without my help. Remember, if something doesn't sit right, doesn't make sense, and seems hinky... then take note of it.

I happen to hear Dr. Phil say on his show "that even though he was taught to give people the benefit of the doubt, he thinks that’s “insane.” “I don’t think you give people benefit of the doubt,” he explains. “I think what you have to do is don’t be pessimistic, don’t be paranoid, but you just go at it and collect data.”

 

[SluethMan]

So he did go to the beach with the 4 year old. Gone for 10 1/2 hours. They weren't at the beach for 9 some hours, so where else did they go? And though everyone is different, who leaves the house at 6:30 am on a free day?

Not reachable by phone......what if there was an emergency at home? or a need to discuss the impending birthday party in Big Bear?

I'm not so ok with this.

What? 8 hours in Solana Beach from 630 in the morning - so early, especially the day after a big argument. That's when he dumped the body for sure. The youngest was taken as an alibi, too young to know what's going on. January is not beach weather in San Diego, been cold and rainy lately too - I'm curious what the weather was on that day. Just my opinions, but he is looking real shady.

 

[realanastasia]

Human remains in East County appear unrelated to missing mom | cbs8.com

from the link: (bolded by me)
“Larry Millete told officers he drove his four-year-old son to the beach in the Lexus on that Friday, according to family members, who also said they tried unsuccessfully that day to reach the husband on his cell phone.

“They left at 6:30 a.m. in the morning to go to Solana Beach and they didn't come back until about 5 p.m. in the afternoon,” Drouaillet said.”

Was this a preplanned trip? That was a long time away from home and a long time to be unavailable by phone. If Maya was not actually behind the locked bedroom door (which appears likely), then he left his girls alone at the house. I don’t like the sound of this.
MOO

To believe it was a pre-planned beach outing, then we would have to believe LM/MM would've told the four-year old son in advance that he wasn't coming to Big Bear for his sister's birthday camping trip?! Or that LM and the son were not included in the plans from the get-go? Hard to imagine an 11-year old wouldn't be at least a bit upset that her dad and brother were opting out of celebrating her special day...

And it's even more unrealistic to think that LM had always planned to take their son to the beach knowing that later that same day they'd all be trekking up to Big Bear, right?