The truth is interesting and what it does to people. There is such a difference between the pros and the DT. I can't explain it. The energy is just...different. Maybe its because it is just sooooo obvious what is truth and what isn't in this case? There are no smoke and mirrors with the pros.
And in another jump, I don't know this family but watching footage of TA...and realizing that he isn't here. He is not in that courtroom, it is JM, Detective Flores, his family. He isn't here. He is gone. I don't get really emotionally invested in trials....it is safer that way. But something about TA has hit me...maybe its because we had similar upbringing in some ways, being naiive with the opposite sex, being clueless in that area, thinking the best of people in when we shouldn't. I see myself in so many ways...and it is odd that only now is it hitting me. In social service fields...if you are a therapist, or a counselor, or any sort of caregiver you must be careful of boundaries and when something starts hitting you too hard you have to take a time out and maybe even get off the case. I have had only one (so far) patient I had to avoid being a caregiver for because I was seeing me as a child in this patient (it was a child as well).
In this case I have avoided that so much...because I saw a lot of me in what is known of TA. And now, towards the end...I see that I wasn't quite as vigilant because now it is hitting me. Seeing that recently released post-mortem of his face started it. Now seeing today's ending argument...made it hit even more. Time to go eat some hummus and kombucha and regroup.