First, I think TB is probably fake (but not because CW wouldn’t have had an affair with a man. In fact, I think there is a possibility that TB may have known a man involved with CW yet to step forward. That may have put the idea in his head to impersonate him or indicate he had proof. That’s also pure speculation, but CW having a gay affair would not surprise me).
However, I am going with the theory that she found out about the co-worker and ongoing affair at or around the 4th of July.
I think if CW was with SW and girls on the first leg of their trip in N.C. that SW might have discovered something fishy going on right around then. Possibly even before he went home, on or around the 4th of July (June 27-July 3) . She may have waited to talk about it until he returned or she may have confronted him before he left, letting things simmer while he was back at home in a very uncomfortable manner.
Her own Facebook post detailed her good feelings for the end of her NC trip, return to CO and upcoming AZ weekend, without mentioning that he was going to be with them at all that last week. I think the omission of his rejoining them all to be somewhat significant. She normally seemed excited to include him or looked forward to reunions with him as she did on her final night when she “couldn’t wait to get home with Chris and the girls.” (I understand we can discuss her individual FB posts here).
Had she had access to any of his electronic devices before the 4th when he left N.C. (at that time, his Facebook account was purportedly still active), she might have learned about it that way and waited to confront him until he left, or did so directly before their goodbyes. Or maybe he slipped up soon after he got home.
The fact he apparently deleted the FB account the very week before their demise is telling in that she may have very well stayed silent about anything she suspected or had discovered until she saw him again when he returned that last week (when they went to Myrtle Beach) and referenced it in an unexpected confrontation at some juncture in their reunion. We can see from his porch tapes that he wasn’t nearly as well thought out with cover ups as he fancied himself to be. He may very well have got busted-and deleted the account shortly after that.
He finally concluded that at least FB was a liability (his Twitter acct remained active) and he knew SW could catch him through it. This held true for the AP as well, (not to mention the public in the future if he thought ahead enough, although IMO I don’t think he actually thought in such a broad context).
The fact that there was recently a People article that claimed he was shocked that the world had knowledge of this case and viewed him as a monster, which plagued him might be accurate. He didn’t think that anything he was going to do might be capable of capturing the attention of a national audience. This man has failed at every step to grasp the brevity of the potential consequences for his actions...
In any event, they both seemed technologically savvy and there’s a possibility SW could have even seen the baby monitors when she was away and he was at home if they were set to the right channels. If so, she may also have been able to glean when he was not home or sleeping in their bed (I personally can’t wrap my head around being so thorough but I would not put it past others).
Possibly in the end he may have just told her bluntly, uncomfortably or possibly tip toed around the truth that he was having an affair. This night have happened once he left after their first week in N.C. (before the 4th when he was purportedly with her)-which is why the fact she found out on the 4th of July has been bandied about.
It’s also possible that in doing this he was trying to convey that this meant that he wanted a separation, yet she was not ready to take that in. Or he may have just wanted her to deal with it, while vulnerable, pregnant with number #3 and stuck in a crappy ménage a trois. I don’t know at all what was going through his head, but he was extremely passive aggressive IMO and he clearly was capable of exacting revenge on every level.
After he went back to CO, and the AP on or around the 4th of July, this may have been easier for him to do.
I have heard from other sources that the 4th of July is when she first found out about an affair. I am not sure how this has been verified or if it’s a known fact. If not, all apologies as these are only theories I’ve tried to examine on the basis that she discovered around the 4th of July that there was trouble brewing on the horizon.