This all sounds reasonable to me, it fits what we know of her personality.
I'm reminded of my ex-husband, reading your post. He was a master at deflecting the attention away from his own actions and making me feel like I was the villain.
One time he decided to cash his check immediately after work and buy beer for all his buddies. We couldn't pay the mortgage! By the end of that argument, I WAS APOLOGIZING to him. And for the life of me, I have no idea how, or why.
You literally fold, and it's like this weird blur. How did I get here? Gaslighting at it's finest.
The skill level - my god. If people like this would only use their powers for GOOD.
My answer to your question about how EG released her anger when JH was home and they were fighting? My guess is that they fought each other, physically. Police reports seem to back that up.
When he wasn't home, she 'fought' the closest thing to JH she had access to. Lucas.