These are 2 beautiful posts by rita & family
for those of you that have never been though anything like this, let me shed a little light on the grieving process
you can google & look up the grieving process on a lost love one, or even a lost love. i wont go into all that
all the experts agree it is about the same steps, & there are a couple (cant remmeber which ones right off hand) that you may go over time & time again
in the case of a missing person (from my experience) you can even get clear to the "acceptance" & have to start over at step one
the slightest glimmer of hope that one is alive can take you out of a greiving process & into more of a faith thing...only to get shot down again & may put a person right back into a denial
there is a lot of guilt, what if I did this or that..etc
there really is something about closure, as well as something really unsettling about lack of closure
closure also comes in many degrees..closure of knowing the truth, closure of having your loved one back, closure of proper burial if the loved one is indeed passed away, closure of coviction of the perp(s)
just a brief recap on me....had a close relative abducted in the fall of 2004 & we figured dead........found bones & close dental match in spring of 2008, positive DNA wasnt achieved until spring of 2009, with a funeral service shortly after.....we only know what happened, not who & why..so as far as me, i have closure on several levels & am still going through many stages of grief, sometimes similtanious
all that said, even getting close to this case has been very hard on me, & dug up wounds that i was sure were healed or at least scabbed over real good..not true
i really avoided it for as long as i could, it was selfish of me, i just want ready to face it, i live close enough to the area i could have searched, i didnt, im real sorry for that looking back..i probably should have been the 1st on the scene just because i know whats it is like in those frantic 1st days
im not sharing all this for a "poor hwj" thing, just shedding some of the reality of what a person goes through, & i really cant imagine if it was my mother
anyhow, may The Lord our God stregthen & sustain the Kimmi's