GUILTY NH - Camden Hughes, 6, suffocated, Hampton, 14 May 2011 #2

[Salem]

As believe09 said - it is time to agree to disagree on the motel manager and move on. In addition, I am seeing accusatory type statements towards the bf. That is unacceptable. He is a victim, unless MSM and/or LE tell us different.

It confuses me how some would try to blame him for Camden's death when he was several states away. If you can't link to bad behavior on his part, please don't suggest it in the threads.

Thanks,

Salem

 

[KaraKitty]

Please do not interpret this as cold bloodedness, because I think this woman deserves compassion for something this atrocious....

But why do people with this kind of a disturbance fixate on someone vulnerable like a child, and why didnt she do away with herself in her home state?

I am NOT advocating for it-I am puzzled as to why her solution was to kill an innocent rather than herself.

Did my post come across as me stating that JM was "cold blooded" because let me set the record straight that was not my intention at all. I have allot of compassion for her, absolutely. I was just making the point that JM was NOT in her right mind to have done what she did.

 

[believe09]

Did my post come across as me stating that JM was "cold blooded" because let me set the record straight that was not my intention at all. I have allot of compassion for her, absolutely. I was just making the point that JM was NOT in her right mind to have done what she did.

NO, NO Kara-I didnt want people thinking I was advocating for her to have committed suicide....I was referring to me, not you.

 

[ela_ss teacher]

Please do not interpret this as cold bloodedness, because I think this woman deserves compassion for something this atrocious....

But why do people with this kind of a disturbance fixate on someone vulnerable like a child, and why didnt she do away with herself in her home state?

I am NOT advocating for it-I am puzzled as to why her solution was to kill an innocent rather than herself.

IIRC in the Andrea Yates (sorry, I said SS at first!) case, she was convinced that she was a horrible mother and that the kids would be better off in Heaven than to have her as a mother. It's possible that if mom was indeed suffering some type of mental illness, she thought she was doing what was best for her child.

I can't imagine where her mind was/is at this point, but as a mother, I don't believe she is an evil monster. She did an evil, monstrous thing to that sweet baby, but I believe she had to be sick. :twocents:

 

[believe09]

Specifically...

Jm killed Camden. Why not herself instead?

ETA: (I had the same question regarding SS...o/t she killed her children (I believe) so she could be free for her man.)

 

[ela_ss teacher]

Specifically...

Jm killed Camden. Why not herself instead?

ETA: (I had the same question regarding SS...o/t she killed her children (I believe) so she could be free for her man.)

Oops!! You're right!! I was thinking about the other girl.... what is her name?? The one who drowned all of her kids... very religious... Andrea Yates.

 

[believe09]

Andrea Yates is a good example, but I believe she had PPP. JM was a little late for it, not that she clearly didnt have other issues.

I am just trying to understand how a mother, who may not have been psychotic like Mrs Yates, might justify ending the life of her little man by taking him a thousand miles away and OD'ing him...or asphyxiating him.....it makes little sense to me. Why not self harm instead?

I will never get this...

 

[KikiWanBaniki]

OK, dumb question but not knowing enough about all this … if someone is in a jail cell and sitting there … how could they committ suicide? How do they know she is suicidal and needing to be watched?

I am trying to remember what the craigslist killer did, cut his wrists, right … how?

Sorry if these are dumb ? but all of you at WS are awesome and will give me the right answers. Thx.

Sorry this is late--I've been very busy today...

My friend's ex-girlfriend and mother of his child killed herself in a jail cell last year. She hanged herself by propping the bed frame vertically against the door, and used the bed linens to form a noose.

Apparently, guards are supposed to be doing rounds frequently enough that this can't happen. Video footage from jail cams showed that the guards on shift that night were socializing in one area, instead of doing the rounds as required.

 

[SarahEcho]

I guess as I actually learned on here, Sarah, is that if you are in some deep dark depression as it appears JM was, she cannot make logical decisions which would have been to take Cam and give him to her family to care for until she got her issues under control. I just cannot (in my right mind) fathom killing my child and from all appearances, she really did love Cam. JM sunk really low, so low that she was not in her right mind and killing her sweet baby was the only thing to do. Just so horribly sad.

Please do not interpret this as cold bloodedness, because I think this woman deserves compassion for something this atrocious....

But why do people with this kind of a disturbance fixate on someone vulnerable like a child, and why didnt she do away with herself in her home state?

I am NOT advocating for it-I am puzzled as to why her solution was to kill an innocent rather than herself.

I don't know what drives people either but if I had to take a guess from what I have seen, perhaps feeling a need to not leave their child in a world full of so much sorrow seems a better option. Some may just have that survival instinct that won't go away to allow them to follow suit. Perhaps it's the ultimate cry for help with a side order of a "need to be punished" gone very wrong.

I don't think it's all cold blooded to wonder why you wouldn't make it simpler on everyone and just do yourself in with a plan of making as least problematic as possible, making it look like an accidental driving off a cliff to avoid a deer or whatever. At least checking into a hotel in an area far enough from your home that nobody knows you and quietly overdosing so that it's unlikely there will be many people having to view you laying there deceased. Point being, empathy seems to warped or non-existent at that point.

 

[SarahEcho]

Sorry this is late--I've been very busy today...

My friend's ex-girlfriend and mother of his child killed herself in a jail cell last year. She hanged herself by.

Sorry to hear that, my thoughts are with them. I hope there is some good to share with the child to remember the mother by.

 

[lauramags]

Specifically...

Jm killed Camden. Why not herself instead?

ETA: (I had the same question regarding SS...o/t she killed her children (I believe) so she could be free for her man.)

She is quoted as saying something in accordance with I wish I was in heaven with my child...but any christian knows that she would not be in heaven immediately if she broke one of the commandments and killed...I wonder if this is why she did not kill herself... I mean in all actuality it is not that difficult to kill yourself... she was too "chicken"??? There is no way she would go to heaven with her sweet baby.

 

[SarahEcho]

IIRC in the Andrea Yates (sorry, I said SS at first!) case, she was convinced that she was a horrible mother and that the kids would be better off in Heaven than to have her as a mother. It's possible that if mom was indeed suffering some type of mental illness, she thought she was doing what was best for her child.

I can't imagine where her mind was/is at this point, but as a mother, I don't believe she is an evil monster. She did an evil, monstrous thing to that sweet baby, but I believe she had to be sick. :twocents:

I think I am in the same boat as you, let's hope it's not the Titanic. There was a case in Newburgh NY recently, involving several children rolling into the water in a minivan. The 10 year old boy escaped and ran for help. The mother changed her mind apparently but it was too late and escape wouldn't happen for the others.

I think the case gives a pretty good look at what is an otherwise "great mother" that is responsible and has a lot going for her. Isolation, despair, relationship problems and too much stress can takes it toll and make someone veer off a rational course. It's not very often we get an account that has such close up view of what goes through the mind of somebody doing this. No telling how many are snapped back to reality by actually acting on the plan, but it's too late.

"Her 10-year-old son, who swam ashore as his mom and three siblings drowned, says his mother told her children, "you're all going to die with me," then changed her mind and tried, too late, to back out of the river, according to the woman who found the sopping wet boy.

"I made a mistake, I made a terrible mistake," the boy quoted his mother as saying."

http://www.9wsyr.com/mostpopular/st...plunge-forgive-me/7F4wB7iPa0WMsoTajX5W1Q.cspx

 

[lauramags]

So very somber. Living on the Seacoast of NH, this has been a discussion topic during lunch for the past few days at the school in which I work.

 

[Wondergirl]

http://news.bostonherald.com/news/columnists/view.bg?articleid=1339255

Shirley Miller recognized the green blanket that covered Camden Hughes’ dead body in the woods of Maine this week.

“It was his security blanket,” she said, the one he brought with him to sleepovers at “Grandma Shirley’s.” That’s what 6-year-old Camden called Shirley Miller, the mother of Robert Miller, Julianne McCrery’s on-again, off-again boyfriend since before Camden was born.

Did I miss something?

Did LE release a picture of the green blanket?

 

[lauramags]

Shirley Miller is the mother of the on again, off again girlfriend of Robert Miller, Juli's boyfriend... GrandmaShirley is how Camden referred to her. via http://news.bostonherald.com/news/c...ting_parent_emerges/srvc=home&position=recent

 

[SarahEcho]

Did I miss something?

Did LE release a picture of the green blanket?

I wondered the same thing. Maybe she was told what it was or assumed, dunno. I really wish the media would help out, at least state that they are unaware of a picture of the blanket being released or whether the person was told that it was the blanket by someone else.

 

[GypsyPrincess]

Look.. I am just going to be honest. I have never had a problem with keeping my emotions in check with cases like this. But this case is killing me. I have a six yr old blond haired kindergarten student that drives me nuts. He is ADHD and brilliant and he drives me crazy. I love him with all my heart. I simply cannot wrap my brain around this. I have sole custody of my kids. I work full time. I barely make ends meet. Hurting my kids has never crossed my mind. They are the reason for my very existence. This case is killing my soul. Camden should have been protected and if his mother was having "bad" thoughts, she should have reached out to someone. There is no excuse for what she did. None.... If you love your children. mental illness or not, you take the appropriate steps to insure their safety. This story has ripped me apart like no other. Crying as I write this. He deserved so much more.

Sorry, didn't mean to rant. I just hate that this couldn't have turned out differently.

 

[KikiWanBaniki]

Gypsy,

I'm on the same wavelength. While I definitely have compassion for the mentally ill (my birth mother was violently bipolar and NPD), I can't quite wrap my head around it, so to speak. I have three spirited children ALL diagnosed with AD/HD. (And for the record, DH and I did get second opinions, different types of tests, etc., just to be sure we agreed with the dx.)

Sometimes (like once a day), I feel like the lady in the old Calgon commercials from the '70's! But not once, EVER, in sixteen years of parenting, have I contemplated harming them. Period.

It's just a sad situation. I have a feeling, like someone else said upthread, that more mothers would seek help if there weren't such stigma attached, and the women could be assured of actual support and help, rather than having their children taken from them. I have known of foster homes that were way worse situations than the ones kids originally came from (not all, but some)--and if a mentally ill mother truly loves her kids, she may feel they are better off at home, even if she can see that the situation isn't ideal...

Sorry for the long post; just my two cents...

 

[yllek]

I wish I was convinced that JM killed Camden because of a mental illness that led her to think she was in some way helping him. In looking at everything we know so far, it looks much more like a mother simply ridding herself of her son. Maybe there will be more evidence forthcoming to support that this was not a self-motivated act. Based on what's been released thus far, JM differs from Andrea Yates by leaps and bounds in my mind.

Andrea Yates begged for help. She institutionalized herself more than once, but insurance would no longer cover it, IIRC. She told her husband that she wasn't up for more children, but he minimized her concerns and they had more children anyway. Her mental illness, PPD, and perception of religious restrictions resulted in the tragic killing of her sons. Immediately after killing her children, she proactively admitted it to her husband and LE. She explained her motive; she wanted them in a better place because she was so inadequate (in her mind). She did not run. She did not try to cover her tracks. She did not lie to her family and the childrens' school/church. She truly thought she had done the right thing and thus she faced the music.

So far, we have positive accounts of JM's mothering from a friend and her older son. I can't think of anyone who killed their child where someone hasn't spoken up on their behalf early on (probably in good faith based on what they believed or because of denial). We know that JM had drug problems, a history of taking off on road trips without telling anyone, and at least two arrests for prostitution; not suggestive of a safe and happy environment, imo..

I do hope for Camden's sake that JM took his life due to a mentally-impaired belief that she was doing the right thing for him. For now, I just can't see it based on all of her deceptive self-serving post-crime behavior. Waiting for more evidence before considering any excuses for Camden's killer. Camden, his brother and those who didn't hurt him are the only known victims, imo, at this point.

JMO...

 

[mrsu]

Shirley Miller is the mother of the on again, off again girlfriend of Robert Miller, Juli's boyfriend... GrandmaShirley is how Camden referred to her. via http://news.bostonherald.com/news/c...ting_parent_emerges/srvc=home&position=recent

In the article above it states:

McCrery had her battles with what Miller called “PMS-ing.”

“She’d get exasperated. She’d get angry at the world.” Not yelling and screaming, Miller said, just angry, though not with Camden, Miller insisted.

I wonder if JM could have been suffering from PMDD? Perhaps this is why she was acting irate and just ended up snapping?

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0004461/