Ronald proposes to Misty #2 UPDATE: Wedding planned for 03-12-09

[RoseRed]

I wish RC and Misti congratulations and the best in their marriage. I would also like to say not all 16 yr olds get married because they are pregnant nor will they be barefoot and pregnant all their lives. Some actually finish their education.

I was married when I was barely 16 and hubby was 21, had my first child at 19 and my second at 26. I have not been barefoot and pregnant all my life. That was almost 44 yrs ago and we are still married although my hubby did get my name tattooed on his body so decided he would have to either keep me or marry someone else with my name.

I also know many people that went to college , got married at 30 and divorced at 32. We can not make life decisions for other people they must make their on life decisions whether for good or bad as far as I can see lots of people make good and bad decisions.

 

[metalcrystal]

I can't get over how Misti's mother allowed it to get to this point, I really can't, she has failed her daughter in every way she possibly could. This is a new millenium and a lot of women have worked really hard so that all women could live up to their full potential, getting education and a shot at any job they want. I know, I know a lot of people married young and are very happy, but as many of you have pointed out, that was another generation. We have had the Womens Movement in our lifetime. Misti has had no guidance, no encouragement to use whatever talents she has to make a decent living for herself, no one telling her she deserves more that being a mans permanent baby sitter at 16. Her mother should be counseling her right now, and if mom can't do it, one of the other adults around her should be. No one is looking out for her.I would never have left a 16-17 yr. old overnight watching our kids, that is waaaaay too much responsibilty for her. I actually think she is a victim herself in a sense, and marrying this man now only seals her fate, or will make it even more difficult for her later on if she ever hopes to develope any sense of self-esteem. As always, JMO!

 

[SeriouslySearching]

Maybe people need to realize we are not walking in their shoes and do not have all of the same goals in mind for our children.

We have become a very competitive society instead of gearing it all towards family. We now equate success with a career instead of simply raising children and being a wife. It is how much money we make, the level of education we obtain, and which college our children attend which make up how society views us. There is NOTHING wrong with becoming a wife and a mother instead of a career oriented person.

30 short years ago, it was pefectly acceptable for a woman to marry right out of high school or even in high school. I know many who married as young as 16 years old and most of those are still married to this day without any regrets.

 

[CeeKer]

I don't necessarily disagree... But people are ascribing all kinds of ulterior, evil motives to something that "could" be explained without evil motives.... I feel the wedding is ill advised at this time. Nobody involved in this "mess" has shown stellar problem solving skills/judgment (both sides) so I just get tired of the attacking to serve people's own opinions when none of us know "the truth" about anything. EITHER SIDE.

 

[ElizaAvalon]

Personally, I would have been even more horrified at the get-go if we had been talking about his 17-year-old "wife" from the start.

I don't know what the "something" is that he's doing something about.

If you're talking about doing the RIGHT something, he should get Misty back to school and wait on the marriage until his daughter is found.

If he did that, I would be the first one to applaud him.

JMO.

 

[cuppy199]

Maybe people need to realize we are not walking in their shoes and do not have all of the same goals in mind for our children.

We have become a very competitive society instead of gearing it all towards family. We now equate success with a career instead of simply raising children and being a wife. It is how much money we make, the level of education we obtain, and which college our children will attend which make up how society views us. There is NOTHING wrong with becoming a wife and a mother instead of a career oriented person.

30 short years ago, it was pefectly acceptable for a woman to marry right out of high school or even in high school. I know many who married as young as 16 years old and most of those are still married to this day without any regrets.

ITA. And let me say Im one of them Been married for 24 years and I was also told I was to young and sealing my fate. But you know what I wouldnt change a thing.And I will be dorn if I let someone tell me whats best for me because no one knows whats best for me more then I do. If this is what Ron and Misty want then I say god bless them.

 

[metalcrystal]

Maybe people need to realize we are not walking in their shoes and do not have all of the same goals in mind for our children.

We have become a very competitive society instead of gearing it all towards family. We now equate success with a career instead of simply raising children and being a wife. It is how much money we make, the level of education we obtain, and which college our children will attend which make up how society views us. There is NOTHING wrong with becoming a wife and a mother instead of a career oriented person.

30 short years ago, it was pefectly acceptable for a woman to marry right out of high school or even in high school. I know many who married as young as 16 years old and most of those are still married to this day without any regrets.

No, no, SS, you misunderstand what I am saying. Of course family comes first, I get that, and I agree. But any girl should be able to experience using her abilities, and the sense of accomplishment that comes from bringing home even a little paycheck. If she wants to! High school teachers and advisors can help kids that age make decisions if their parents can't. Schools like HS and college do more for an individual than teach facts. Some kids need the 4-6 years to mature before they can even think of marrying.And, yes, you are right that our culture is different now. There is nothing wrong with a mom having a job or career, too. It isn't always at the expense of her family.
Don't take my post personally, I am referring to Misti, who seems immature to me. Many girls are quite capable of heading up families at 16. In this particular situation, I don't think the bride is one of them. Again, I dont blame her at all. She is trying to survive the best she can in a horrifc situation. I just think she deserves a better life than survival mode.

 

[TxLady2]

Maybe people need to realize we are not walking in their shoes and do not have all of the same goals in mind for our children.

We have become a very competitive society instead of gearing it all towards family. We now equate success with a career instead of simply raising children and being a wife. It is how much money we make, the level of education we obtain, and which college our children will attend which make up how society views us. There is NOTHING wrong with becoming a wife and a mother instead of a career oriented person.

30 short years ago, it was pefectly acceptable for a woman to marry right out of high school or even in high school. I know many who married as young as 16 years old and most of those are still married to this day without any regrets.

But you missed the point. That was another generation. My own parents married very young. They stuck it out for 67 years, but I'm sure there were problems along the way. However, this is now. Many couples who don't marry until they are in their 20's and 30's are divorced within 5 years.
This marriage has about as much chance of lasting as any other, but that is not the point. Getting married right now while his daughter is missing is just in very poor taste. It makes it seem that they are selfish and only doing what they want, rather than what is right.
Fifty years ago, one did not have to have an education to get ahead, but nowadays you can't even get a decent job without a college degree. And most families cannot live on just what the husband makes, they require two incomes to even meet their needs.
I'm sad that they chose now to do this. Why didn't they get married before Misty moved in? Does it require living together to decide if you love someone enough to marry them? Since neither one had been married before, there was nothing to hold them back, so why couldn't it have been done while his daughter was around, if this is what she wanted? This looks more like a publicity stunt than anything else, to me. JMO.

 

[CeeKer]

Personally, I would have been even more horrified at the get-go if we had been talking about his 17-year-old "wife" from the start.

I don't know what the "something" is that he's doing something about.

If you're talking about doing the RIGHT something, he should get Misty back to school and wait on the marriage until his daughter is found.

If he did that, I would be the first one to applaud him.

JMO.

Re what I bolded above from your post. I thought I had clearly stated the "something" in the first paragraph of my post "Maybe he's simply trying to do something, anything, to show he's a stand up guy."

I'm not saying I AGREE with the decision. Not saying I "think" this is why they're doing it. Not saying this would make me think he's a stand up guy... Just pointing out that this "could be" what he is thinking as a balance to the negative motives often ascribed to him.

What you and I would think is the "RIGHT" thing to do, doesn't necessarily apply to what other would do, no matter how much better the world would be if everyone did as we on this forum appear to do in our lives.
ETA: Don't mean that snarky, I wish people were as responsible and caring as people on this forum.

 

[ElizaAvalon]

No, no, SS, you misunderstand what I am saying. Of course family comes first, I get that, and I agree. But any girl should be able to experience using her abilities, and the sense of accomplishment that comes from bringing home even a little paycheck. If she wants to! High school teachers and advisors can help kids that age make decisions if their parents can't. Schools like HS and college do more for an individual than teach facts. Some kids need the 4-6 years to mature before they can even think of marrying.And, yes, you are right that our culture is different now. There is nothing wrong with a mom having a job or career, too. It isn't always at the expense of her family.
Don't take my post personally, I am referring to Misti, who seems immature to me. Many girls are quite capable of heading up families at 16. In this particular situation, I don't think the bride is one of them. Again, I dont blame her at all. She is trying to survive the best she can in a horrifc situation. I just think she deserves a better life than survival mode.

:clap:

I think I'm not alone in saying that I can write her life story right now, from this day forward. And it ain't pretty.

 

[ElizaAvalon]

Re what I bolded above from your post. I thought I had clearly stated the "something" in the first paragraph of my post "Maybe he's simply trying to do something, anything, to show he's a stand up guy."

I'm not saying I AGREE with the decision. Not saying I "think" this is why they're doing it. Not saying this would make me think he's a stand up guy... Just pointing out that this "could be" what he is thinking as a balance to the negative motives often ascribed to him.

What you and I would think is the "RIGHT" thing to do, doesn't necessarily apply to what other would do, no matter how much better the world would be if everyone did as we on this forum appear to do in our lives.
ETA: Don't mean that snarky, I wish people were as responsible and caring as people on this forum.

Well, that's what I don't get. How is marrying her proving that he's a stand up guy? (and, I'm not saying you think so)

And why isn't a single person in his circle telling him otherwise?

TN has really disappointed me.

JMO.

~I really need to get off this thread.~

 

[Tom'sGirl]

​

Temporarily closed!

Many have taken the wrong direction in keeping with the topic of this thread​

 

[Tom'sGirl]

We'll try this again, PLEASE stay on topic.

When the actual wedding occurs I'll close this thread for good and start a new one "Ron & Misty Marry"

 

[orb4me]

Is everyone just watching the back of a tv with blue wires?

I knew that somehow a picture would show up of R asking M.

Didnt you like the way they walked out of the court house after getting their license? I think that picture says an awful lot.

 

[Patience]

http://www.cbs12.com/news/haleigh_4715639___article.html/cummings_tips.html

 

[Patience]

http://wdbo.com/localnews/2009/03/father-of-missing-putnam-girl.html

 

[Melanie]

Please, if someone knows - who will be covering the wedding? How much dosh will they get for the "rights". To me, it's all about the big dollar - not a married 17 year old married to a 27 year old man. There HAS to be money involved (IMHO).

Will we see the wedding on NG tonight? Are they off to Disneyland tomorrow. I sure hope JR goes to the bio-mom, because these two are not acting normal.

For one, wait until you get married when HC comes home (thogh I personally think she's passed by now).

This whole wedding thing is totally innapropriate.

Best,

Mel

Edited to add: will she wear a wedding dress, or is it a jeans/t-shirt/smoking kind of ceremony? Reception? Honeymoon? All interesting questions,,....

 

[kikid]

snipped from article located here: Friends of Crystal Sheffield, Haleigh's mother, call the timing of the ceremony completely inappropriate. Family friend, Christine Watkins says, "It's disgusting. While they could be out looking for Haleigh, they're making wedding plans? How happy they are...imagine that."

 

[radio]

Cummings family...TN, saying Haleigh always wanted this=
Ronald and Misty to marry. Really? Always? What-for about
4 months??? Is that always???

 

[Melanie]

http://www.fox30online.com/content/...s-Getting-Married/jVE76f-4NE2es3bFqTuuKw.cspx

What a load of carp. Since when does a young child want a 17 year old as a mommy, compared to his REAL mommy? There's a bond there that can't be broken. I'm not buying it - not for a minute.

JMHO

Melanie