I'm going to take a shot at answering this because I watched a part of the dateline show last night and honestly the strongest feeling I came away with was that if DY and I ever met (and without the current circumstances) I probably wouldn't care for her much. That said, she is a victim and I don't think anyone intends to belittle that fact. In fact if her relationship with KH was ruined due to an extra-marital affair between KH and TH then she is also a victim of that as well. AND, if she intended to regain custody of Kyron when she recovered but lost him to his father unwillingly then I feel for her situation there also. I certainly don't envy her position, nor does anyone else IMO. BUT, (and this is very hard to say) she distracts from her message with the way she presents herself. Rolling eyes, knowing looks at whoever is there with her, tons of inuendo, absolute insistance that her opinion is absolutely correct. She clearly has a lot of animosity toward TH, and who could blame her for that? However, in this situation it would be appropriate to put personal feelings for TH aside and speak in a matter of fact way. But the way she acts/talks I can't help but be reminded of every jilted wife in history talk smack about the other woman, or that I'm seeing a one sided "cat-fight" (sorry for the stereotype but some of us women do behave that way). I think the reason I find it disturbing is just because I don't like to get involved in situations where people act that way, even if the person doing the talking is right about the other person. And as I see it if DY is this way during this most devastating of situations then it isn't an act, its how she is, and like a lot of people I just shut down and stop listening when a woman talks with barely veiled hatred toward another woman and write it off as unsettled business between them. Right or wrong, its a knee-jerk reaction. I also understand that not everyone sees her body language the way I do and will disagree with all of my observations and I'm good with that, because really in a situation like this there is no right or wrong way to react.
Please don't think I'm slamming DY because I'm not. Her son is missing and frankly she can cope any way she feels she needs to. I'm just trying to give an honest appraisal of why DY isn't winning the hearts of a lot of people, including mine. Of course it doesn't matter one bit what anyone thinks about DY, she has bigger things to worry about. But since you said you don't understand why some people feel the need to put her down I thought I would offer my insite as to why I (and some others too) don't feel warm fuzzies for her. I don't think I've ever put her down though and I'd hope that I never would even though I may question her actions occasionally.
First, I want to say thank you for such an eloquent explanation. I partially agree with this, and I understand better now why some people question DY's words and actions. Yes, it does appear at times that she hates TH and has for a long time. It does appear that this animosity fuels the fire against TH, but that is not what makes me think, personally, that she is guilty.
Even if she harbors great resentment and animosity towards TH, LE has to have more than "the f'in b**** kidnapped my son and probably killed him" in order to do an investigation into TH. As much as my faith was shaken today, I do not believe the LE is going to go off of the word of a mother who hates the stepmother of her child to ruin the life of the stepmother. Regardless of what DY and even KH says about TH, this investigation did not come about because TH failed to win the family popularity contest. It came about because she brought suspicion through a story and timeline that have not added up to LE.
I do understand the need to question DY's words and actions, but I don't think people should make the leap (and I am not accusing you by the way) that this whole thing against TH could have been avoided had KH and DY not ever said anything bad about her. If her story still didn't line up and KH and DY had never said a word about her, LE would still investigate her. That's how LE works. They do not troll the nearest dysfunctional family and investigate the person who is most hated. LE is not Jerry Springer.
Her story didn't match up for LE. There were inconsistencies they are still investigating, and THAT is what makes me think she is guilty. DY and KH could be calling her mother of the year and I would still think she was guilty because her timeline is not adding up. Maybe I'm too cynical, but I can't rationalize everything away like it's just something innocent. I look her at her timeline, which doesn't add up, and her actions since 6/4, which have not been the actions of an innocent woman, and I see someone that is not innocent. She did something, she is guilty of something, and if she's willing to let herself look bad for what happened to Kyron to cover up something else, that is her fault, not DY and KH's fault.
Whether the emails factor into that, I don't know and I really don't care unless she made threats to DY or said something tangible that makes her look bad. I am tired of endless soap opera stuff being said about her, probably as tired as most people, which is why I got so frustrated this afternoon. KH and DY can talk bad about her all they want, but that is not, in the end, what makes me think she's guilty. They are parents, they are victims, and what else can they do but focus on the woman that they believe did this to their son? I don't blame them for the way they feel, but I do think they should talk less about it. Less drama and more facts are SORELY needed here. And nitpicking DY and KH to death about everything they do does not make me think TH is innocent, and is not going to bring Kyron home. Focusing on the drama of TH doesn't help either. I stick with timeline and her actions, the only tangible things here that, to me, point to her guilt.
But I do respect your opinion and the need to question her words and actions. We are all entitled to our opinions, and I am thankful you expressed your point so very well tonight. It's good that we can agree to disagree and still have a good debate. It's what I like best about WS.
