The Duggar Family: 18 Kids & Counting

[gngr~snap]

A death of a child is not a sign from God IMO.

I agree. I do believe it's not only a sign but proof that her womb is functioning at diminished capacity and no longer able to supply a fetus with what it needs to sustain life. She may continue to be "fertile", however it is medically unlikely that she will produce a viable child again.
It's not God that is doing this to her it's her body/organs after years of working tirelessly that can no longer function properly with the stress a pregnancy causes.
It is a tragic loss I am sure, but Michelle needs to accept that it is no longer wise to continue to try to have children. At this point any future babies just may end up like Jubilee... with no chance of life at all.
My prayers go out to her in the hopes she is able to realize it is best to focus on the children she has and ALL the grand babies to come.

 

[angelmom]

If they don't take Jubilee's death as a "sign from God," then shame on them.:twocents:

Wow. Comments like these are the reason that bereaved parents need support groups in the first place.

Need a link for me to back that statement up? Let's see if I can find one.


http://moms.today.msnbc.msn.com/_ne...-not-to-say-to-a-woman-whos-had-a-miscarriage

http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/miscarriage/a/aa101799.htm

http://wordsthatcomfort.com/index.php/miscarriage/73-what-not-to-say-after-a-miscarriage

http://blog.beliefnet.com/flunkings...iage-guest-blogger-elise-erikson-barrett.html

http://www.bandbacktogether.com/what-not-to-say-after-a-miscarriage/

http://www.troubledwith.com/LoveandSex/A000000341.cfm?topic=love and sex: miscarriage

http://www.listmyfive.com/9c7bd31f/The-Top-Five-Things-Not-to-Say-After-a-Miscarriage

http://miscarriage.about.com/od/forfriendsandfamily/tp/whatnottosay.htm

http://mommyish.com/pregnancy-healt...who-has-had-a-miscarriage-514/gallery-page/3/

 

[katydid23]

I don't think you can compare the Duggars to most families. I think it is possibly some kind of a sign that she should be grateful for the 19 children she has already. Why push for more, after the last two medical crisis? If it were her first two pregnancies, then by all means, keep on trying. But there is no reason that she needs to have more than 19 children. Imo, that is just obsessive, selfish on her part. JMO

eta: I had 3 early miscarriages, then instead of having a second surgery, to try and clear open my tubes, I opted for adoption. I think it was a sign from God because we ended up with our perfect family. I ended up with the exact two kids I was supposed to have. imoo

 

[Kimberlyd125]

It's their choice. It's her body.
It's their beliefs.

 

[katydid23]

It's their choice. It's her body.
It's their beliefs.

yes it is. But she is not the only one affected by her decisions. I imagine that her younger children did not see too much of their mom during Josie's birth and during her medical crisis. I think I read that Mom lived at the hospital for awhile. Then, the same would probably be true of this last pregnancy. In my opinion, her younger children NEED her attention. I think it is unfair for her to decide to try and have more children, in spite of the recent tragedies, while her younger children are missing the attention from their mother. So yes, it is her decision, but it affects more than just her.

 

[animlzrule]

A death of a child is not a sign from God IMO.

Nor is the conception or birth of a child. IMO.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

Nor is the conception or birth of a child. IMO.

No that's a gift from God IMO.

 

[animlzrule]

Clearly her uterus is no longer ok with being used as a clown car, and her eggs are nearing their expiration date. I'd like to think she'll have an epiphany at this point and realize that being a breeder does not make her noteworthy except as an illustration of narccisism and selfishness. Although it's been lucrative for them I think her time would be better spent actually being a mother and raising the children she already has. I don't have much hope for her though. Stockholm syndrome comes to mind, with King Duggar as her svengali.

 

[DairyGirl]

yes it is. But she is not the only one affected by her decisions. I imagine that her younger children did not see too much of their mom during Josie's birth and during her medical crisis. I think I read that Mom lived at the hospital for awhile. Then, the same would probably be true of this last pregnancy. In my opinion, her younger children NEED her attention. I think it is unfair for her to decide to try and have more children, in spite of the recent tragedies, while her younger children are missing the attention from their mother. So yes, it is her decision, but it affects more than just her.

The birth of every child affects more then just the mother. Should parents stop having children because another one may take attention away from a sibling? Or create more work for them?
Those children seem happier and better adjusted then most so whatever they are doing is working and they don't seem to be lacking for love and attention.

 

[jjenny]

The birth of every child affects more then just the mother. Should parents stop having children because another one may take attention away from a sibling? Or create more work for them?
Those children seem happier and better adjusted then most so whatever they are doing is working and they don't seem to be lacking for love and attention.

These people got 19 kids. 19. She had numerous c-cections, she had complications with the previous pregnancy, her #19 child was born extremely premature and #20 didn't make it at all. If this woman doesn't stop I believe she might very well end up dying from complications. I guess in that case Jim Bob can get married again and start all over. Well I am not going to cheer for it.

 

[katydid23]

The birth of every child affects more then just the mother. Should parents stop having children because another one may take attention away from a sibling? Or create more work for them?
Those children seem happier and better adjusted then most so whatever they are doing is working and they don't seem to be lacking for love and attention.

I just don't think you can make that argument when you are talking about a family of 19 kids. Of course, EVERY new sibling affects the others. But I really do not have a problem with large families. My mother was the oldest of 10 in a large Irish Catholic family. She loved having so many sibs. But 10 is not 19.

And once you have had 19 kids, and you begin to have serious medical complications, some of which can be deadly for yourself and the new child, then why keep going? Isn't the whole point of having children so that one can have a family life and carry on their legacy and have their happy kids growing up around them? It just seems unfair to the other children to put the mother's life at risk just for having the 20th or 21st child. imoo

And they may be getting lots of attention, but not from their mother most likely. No way a mother can give much individual attention to each of her 19 kids. It is not physically possible. There are only 24 hrs in a day.

 

[Kimberlyd125]

A family, thank God, has every right to make decisions they feel are right for them.

 

[MissJames]

They don't have 19 kids requiring their mother's individual attention.Six of them are over 18 ,one married with kids of his own.Five are between the ages of 12 and 17 .

Many kids have mothers with careers .That's why the phrase "it's not the quantity but the quality of the time" came about.
To say a stay at home mom gives her child less time because she has too many kids sounds rather ironic too me. What about the kids who spend from 6:30 am to 5:30 pm in daycare,get picked up ,a quick dinner ,then bedtime,just to do the same thing tomorrow? Is anyone criticizing the moms who have busy careers?

 

[katydid23]

I won't say anymore about it. It is just my opinion, nothing more. I think that 19 kids should be quite enough to take care of for any parent. And just because a child is over 12, imo, it does not mean they no longer need their mom's attention. But whatever, it's a free country.

 

[MissJames]

I won't say anymore about it. It is just my opinion, nothing more. I think that 19 kids should be quite enough to take care of for any parent. And just because a child is over 12, imo, it does not mean they no longer need their mom's attention. But whatever, it's a free country.

A 12 year doesn't require the amount of attention a two year old would.That's my point.

 

[Linda7NJ]

It's their choice. It's her body.
It's their beliefs.

Would you feel that way if she chose to abort?

 

[luckyme]

I will put my :twocents:in. When i read the tmz article and saw the blurred picture it brought back painful memories for me. I too lost a child at 20 weeks and after that i said i would never have another child. I did have another child to my suprise. My whole pregnancy was miserable because of fear. My last child is much younger than his siblings and a great joy to our family. That pregnancy took a toll on my body. We opted to make our family complete with four children. I had three miscarriages in between. I am the same age as mrs duggar and i cant imagine what her body has gone through! 19 kids and miscarriages on top of that. I think her health could be in jeopardy down the line. moo!!

 

[AnaTeresa]

Clearly her uterus is no longer ok with being used as a clown car, and her eggs are nearing their expiration date. I'd like to think she'll have an epiphany at this point and realize that being a breeder does not make her noteworthy except as an illustration of narccisism and selfishness. Although it's been lucrative for them I think her time would be better spent actually being a mother and raising the children she already has. I don't have much hope for her though. Stockholm syndrome comes to mind, with King Duggar as her svengali.

Unfortunately, because she has spent so much time pregnant, she probably still has a lot of eggs left - she hasn't had that many cycles to go through her store yet. For a variety of other medical reasons, her future pregnancies probably will not be viable, but most of her eggs are still viable because she's not used most of them up.

 

[animlzrule]

Unfortunately, because she has spent so much time pregnant, she probably still has a lot of eggs left - she hasn't had that many cycles to go through her store yet. For a variety of other medical reasons, her future pregnancies probably will not be viable, but most of her eggs are still viable because she's not used most of them up.

Yes, she likely has sufficient egg quantity, however, maternal age is the best indicator of egg quality. Chromosomal abnormalities in eggs increase significantly with aging. There is no test for egg viability.

 

[katydid23]

A 12 year doesn't require the amount of attention a two year old would.That's my point.

Imo ,they require more attention.