I agree with what Chris said about forgiveness. It only destroys the one refusing to forgive.
I ALSO AGREE that some are not ready yet.
That is ok. Everyone has their own path.
But he planted an idea seed that you can nurture to forgiveness when you are ready.
The old saying is true:
Carrying hatred only destroys the vessel carrying it.
It doesn't hurt JA that someone hates her. She doesn't even know us, know some hate her nor would she probably care if she did know.
I went to counseling years ago for an awful childhood trauma. It took a while to even feel the anger toward the person who traumatized me after so many years of trying to stuff it down. (and I was AFRAID of that anger! Afraid if I tapped into it I would literally lose my mind or it would case me to do something very harmful).
Anyway after two years, and having worked through a LOT of crap I told my counselor that I was PIZZED that this person had taken so much of my life. My life spent in pain, scared, traumatized and eventually angry. That I was PIZZED that others had paid a price for what this creep did - my hubby, my kids, my friends -because I wasn't all I could have been while I carried this burden that *advertiser censored**hole gave me!
She let me get it out and then it was silent. After a minute or two I lifted my head and said to her:
I forgive him. I will never say what he did is ok, because it will NEVER be, but I forgive him. My anger keeps me his prisoner. My anger gives him that moment of time in my life. He has taken TOO MUCH from me already! I WILL NOT GIVE HIM ANOTHER MOMENT OF MY LIFE!
That was such a powerful moment in my life. There were times I had to remind myself of my vow (old habits die hard sometimes
![Smile :) :)](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
but
I set myself free that day. I encourage any of you holding on to some garbage others have laid on you to try to do the same.
You will never regret it.