I agree, it's a social convention in traditional marriages, the husband earns the money/status, but the wife handles relationships.It’s a red herring, lots of people put the woman first.
An assertion like that should be supported by evidence, but that’s not possible in this situation.
"the wife’s name is ALWAYS first when using first names: “Jane and John Doe”.... In social importance, the woman is always first, then males, then children. Traditionally, the man’s first and surnames are never separated. "

Etiquette 101: Whose name should be first, the husband’s or the wife’s?
My interest in “paper etiquette” started in college as I began more frequent correspondence with family and friends and began my professional career. You have to know who to address and…
JMO