I definitely agree with you here. This is a huge tragedy that has victimized many people and I am here because I can’t stop feeling for them all. This does include the KM and BS: the children they were in the past and the young men they *could* have grown up to be had they not gone down this path. I am not in any way condoning their horrible actions. There is no way to justify this violence.
I posted some time last week about how upset I was seeing how KM and BS’ parents were being picked apart on here. I stand by what I said then. The parents of the killers are victims here and nobody has the right to judge them.
One person replied to my post saying that when I was asking for empathy toward AS, I should have been focusing on the Deese, Fowler, and Dyck families. I chose not to engage with this person because I don’t feel that it was offered as a means of thoughtful discussion. If this poster felt that extending compassion and empathy to one person means that you are taking it away from another... well... he/she’s doing it wrong. Empathy grows empathy.
Mental illness is a horrible, invisible disability that can devastate entire families. It lies and distorts and is painful. I know that we all are tainted by our personal biases, and I tend to see most people as doing the best they can with the resources they have. Assuming mental illnesses were at play here, I only wish that these boys had found help long ago. So much pain and tragedy would have been avoided.