CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #15

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  • #1,121
No mention of Dylan wanting to spend time with his father tho , all about him wanting to see his old friends . That says a lot when he is barely sees his dad !

Oh, I never said he was THRILLED, no I didn't make any claims on his feelings.

I was simply pointing out that he was NOT begrudging or angry and begging not to go.

I said it in opposition the the image some are painting, not to paint a new picture.

Sticking to the facts.

:banghead:
 
  • #1,122
This is in general regarding a sick grandparent, not to you.

Unless there is something new I haven't seen, it was not a sick grandparent. It's a RUMOR of a sick AUNT. Someone made an account here, said they were kin, and said he was being forced to go and miss holiday with his sick aunt who has cancer. Then they stopped posting I believe. Mind you, it's almost Christmas and mom was probably going to have Dylan for Christmas, the larger holiday. That's how custody works, heck that's how marriage works. You have to take turns between families.

I'm not doubting you, but do you have a link to any of those 3 posts? I can't remember the person's name or when they were posted. TIA

ETA: Thanks mck16!
 
  • #1,123
This is in general regarding a sick grandparent, not to you.

Unless there is something new I haven't seen, it was not a sick grandparent. It's a RUMOR of a sick AUNT. Someone made an account here, said they were kin, and said he was being forced to go and miss holiday with his sick aunt who has cancer. Then they stopped posting I believe. Mind you, it's almost Christmas and mom was probably going to have Dylan for Christmas, the larger holiday. That's how custody works, heck that's how marriage works. You have to take turns between families.


This is what was posted earlier by supposedly a member of the family.

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#7 11-30-2012, 09:22 AM
findDylan
Registered User Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3

I just got an account and wanted to share that Dylan wanted to spend Thanksgiving with his mom and other family as his Grandma has cancer. It was going to be a big get togeather with pictures being taken.

FYI
 
  • #1,124
I don't know if this is a blanket statement or a personal experience, but if it's the latter, I'm very sorry :cry:

thanks, its what I've seen happen with a few kids. one of my friends is still in counselling trying to deal with the issues from their parents, and two sweet little kids have been traumatised so much that both see counsellors and one is also on medication.

Sometimes adults don't know or care how their actions and behaviour impacts on the kids.

My personal experiencce was a mother who put my father down to me constantly, I finally met him when I was about to enter my teens, and for many years I kept trying to have a father daughter relationship, until I realised that it was only hurting me and he really couldn't have cared less, the final straw was his 3rd wife being totally disrespectful to me. It's been almost 11 years since I saw him and I tried to contact him on behalf of family when one of his brothers died, that was 2 1/2 years ago and I'm still waiting for the return call that I was assured he would make.
 
  • #1,125
You know that the MSM has done a number on this case. There first headlines read things like"Boy who was on court ordered visitation goes missing" stuff like that....if you make it about Dylan and not the make up of his parents relationship, it should of read something like "Child missing from fathers home" I know it doesnt sell papers or news stories, but they messed all this up from the get go. JMO
 
  • #1,126
This is what was posted earlier by supposedly a member of the family.

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#7 11-30-2012, 09:22 AM
findDylan
Registered User Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3

I just got an account and wanted to share that Dylan wanted to spend Thanksgiving with his mom and other family as his Grandma has cancer. It was going to be a big get togeather with pictures being taken.

FYI

thank you for finding that. do we know where this get-together was to take place? geographically i mean...colorado springs?

TIA.
 
  • #1,127
You know that the MSM has done a number on this case. There first headlines read things like"Boy who was on court ordered visitation goes missing" stuff like that....if you make it about Dylan and not the make up of his parents relationship, it should of read something like "Child missing from fathers home" I know it doesnt sell papers or news stories, but they messed all this up from the get go. JMO

You are absolutely correct and this is where the rumor got started that it was a court ordered visitation. I say rumor because have any of us see the documented 'court order'. If so, please direct me to that because I have not and I have looked for it. Could this be another case of 'misreporting' that some think has been so common here? It seems to me that only documents that are reporting info that is representing MR in a bad light are not sealed or are misreported. Maybe true, but sure is strange to me. jmo
 
  • #1,128
its what I've seen happen with a few kids. one of my friends is still in counselling trying to deal with the issues from their parents, and two sweet little kids have been traumatised so much that both see counsellors and one is also on medication.

Sometimes adults don't know or care how their actions and nehaviour impacts on the kids.

My personal experiencce was a mother who put my father down to me constantly, I finally met him when I was about to enter my teens, for many years I kept trying to have a father daughter relationship, until I realised that it was hurting me and he really couldn't have cared less, the final straw was his 3rd wife being totally disrespectful to me. It's been almost 11 years since I saw him and I tried to contact him on behalf of family when one of his brothers died, that was 2 1/2 years ago and I'm still waiting for the return call that I was assured he would make.

No offense intended, and I don't mean to minimize the relationship, or lack there of, that you had with your father. I'm sure it has been painful, but you can't make generalizations based on what happened with a few kids. I know a lot more people who grew up having problems with a custodial parent because she/he put down the non-custodial one and refused to allow visits. Things like that tend to not only alienate the other parent, I believe that it alienates both parents to some extent. MOO
 
  • #1,129
thank you for finding that. do we know where this get-together was to take place? geographically i mean...colorado springs?

TIA.

IIRC it was to take place at castle rock

which is also apparantly where MR's brother lives
 
  • #1,130
  • #1,131
You are absolutely correct and this is where the rumor got started that it was a court ordered visitation. I say rumor because have any of us see the documented 'court order'. If so, please direct me to that because I have not and I have looked for it. Could this be another case of 'misreporting' that some think has been so common here? It seems to me that only documents that are reporting info that is representing MR in a bad light are not sealed or are misreported. Maybe true, but sure is strange to me. jmo

I've thought from day one that term was misleading because thanksgiving and christmas are COURT ORDERED in every single case of divorce/visitation/ child support aka SAPCR's . That 's what they are referred to around here anyway. So every other Thanksgiving is moms and every other dads,, same with Christmas. That is the way for it to be fair and it does not matter who had them last as far as the weekend visit or what not. Thanksgiving was dad this year and Christmas was mom. It's l ikely been ' court ordered' since the date of the divorce which is a big difference from a NEW case just to get Dylan to MR's for this particular week. I think the ' court ordered' term needs thrown out of this story because it implies a lot that is not likely true.
 
  • #1,132
You are absolutely correct and this is where the rumor got started that it was a court ordered visitation. I say rumor because have any of us see the documented 'court order'. If so, please direct me to that because I have not and I have looked for it. Could this be another case of 'misreporting' that some think has been so common here? It seems to me that only documents that are reporting info that is representing MR in a bad light are not sealed or are misreported. Maybe true, but sure is strange to me. jmo

Another thing about the way it is stated is this"Court ordered visitation" people take that to mean what? Is it bad to have court ordered visitation, heck half the people in the US have court ordered visitation. Every time you pick up a child that has visitation with a parent it's court ordered(well almost always). Take out the court ordered part of the story and you have MR had a visit with his son for Thanksgiving.....that means more than the court ordered part to me.:moo:

I think DR wanted to be with his dad, maybe not for all the reason MR wished he wanted to be there.
 
  • #1,133
ITA I thought it was rather telling when being asked directly that Elaine basically said that the reason he didn't exercise his parental rights much the past 3 years is that he was working on the road a lot of the time. She also changed her statement from saying that Dylan didn't want to go/be there to saying that Mark really didn't know him well.

I've seen the press change the wording of things that Mark has said, and add to them once they become aware of more, but I haven't heard or seen a direct quote of anything he has changed his story about. MOO

Tracked it down and corrected post!
 
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  • #1,136
Ever feel like there's something big you're missing -- right under your nose; obvious, but not --
Please let me know when you figure out what this thing is. No matter how many scenarios I go through, i'm looking at MR at the end of the day.

What are we missing....?
 
  • #1,137
I've thought from day one that term was misleading because thanksgiving and christmas are COURT ORDERED in every single case of divorce/visitation/ child support aka SAPCR's . That 's what they are referred to around here anyway. So every other Thanksgiving is moms and every other dads,, same with Christmas. That is the way for it to be fair and it does not matter who had them last as far as the weekend visit or what not. Thanksgiving was dad this year and Christmas was mom. It's l ikely been ' court ordered' since the date of the divorce which is a big difference from a NEW case just to get Dylan to MR's for this particular week. I think the ' court ordered' term needs thrown out of this story because it implies a lot that is not likely true.

My understanding of what's been said is that she went to court and got primary parenting time (custody), and then he had to go to get parenting time (visitation). Originally it was supposed to be 50/50, but when she moved him so far away, that was no longer feasible. MOO
 
  • #1,138
No offense intended, and I don't mean to minimize the relationship, or lack there of, that you had with your father. I'm sure it has been painful, but you can't make generalizations based on what happened with a few kids. I know a lot more people who grew up having problems with a custodial parent because she/he put down the non-custodial one and refused to allow visits. Things like that tend to not only alienate the other parent, I believe that it alienates both parents to some extent. MOO


no offence intended but I've seen a lot over the years and it goes both I ways. saying a few doesn't mean one or two or even a handful or two. maybe I should have said quite a few.

Don't make the mistake of thinking I'm generalising as a whole, I'm not I'm only saying it happens.

And yes I would definitely agree that it alienates the other parent somewhat too, it affected the relationship between my mother and I for years.
 
  • #1,139
hmmm...interesting...thank you!!!

I am thinking based on the report that MR said, we discussed going to my brother's on Thanksgiving, that he could have been doing that so DR could maybe see his Grandmother too. I don't have any idea just a thought.
 
  • #1,140
This is what was posted earlier by supposedly a member of the family.

View Single Post
#7 11-30-2012, 09:22 AM
findDylan
Registered User Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3

I just got an account and wanted to share that Dylan wanted to spend Thanksgiving with his mom and other family as his Grandma has cancer. It was going to be a big get togeather with pictures being taken.

FYI
Yup, I went and looked. thread 6 repeatedly says sick aunt, so that got in my head. But thread 5 does indeed say grandmother.

Also, though, the poster said that she found it doing a search- so it is internet rumor, and has not come from any real sources. [ame="http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8593483&postcount=13"]Websleuths Crime Sleuthing Community - View Single Post - CO CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #5[/ame]
 
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