CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #16

[Bravo]

Maybe it's just me but it seems beyond cruel to send a text indicating "Our" Son seems to have gone amiss. Then not answer. That moment should be all about Dylan and finding him. If Dad was at LE why not have one of them call Mom. Mom had to make the call herself to LE. That's just me and my opinion.

 

[asyousay]

It wasn't even a phone call. It was a text.

How can a human being that cold. I can not believe he cold not even call her to break the news that her son was missing.

 

[Confusion]

It wasn't even a phone call. It was a text.

How many times has it been said that texts worked there, but phone calls often didn't?

 

[asyousay]

a) he didn't use it as a cop out, in fact he's refrained from talking too much about it at all. When baited by press he even said he wasn't going to lash out at his ex wife.
b) You're right- ER can lash out and lose her cool, there are no hard and fast rules for how you respond to such devastating news. I hope nobody chooses to judge her for for being upset and speaking from her heart at such a time!

IMO parents should not be judged because their actions don't match what others think they should. It's an extremely emotional experience, and nobody can really define a rational and normal baseline. As long as they keep talking openly with LE and cooperating entirely, which both parents have, the rest is flexible to me.

Sorry i stand by what i said. Especially now i know the man did not even break the news via the phone and used a text to do it.

Words fail me on this one.

MOO

 

[Abby Normal Again]

I think someone here shared their own experience when their child went missing (and she or he was innocent) and said that the initial interview is grueling and can last hours. So, his son was missing, he had just been interviewed for a lengthy time period, and he gets on his phone afterward to see a bunch of nasty messages...yes, I can see him ignoring those. Maybe not the best thing to do, but, for me, reasonable if we consider him a distraught victim at this point.
Or maybe he is just cold and mean, but I don't think we have enough evidence to say either way at this point.

There may have been others, but I made a really long post about my experience a thread or two back.

I was able to glance at my phone, but I was only able to half process incoming messages. Basically I just observed if it was said child or not, everything was just surreal. I certainly didn't have the thought to type on my phone. My husband was in the driveway with me, and we never even got to say two words to each other, much less type.

[ame="http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8619848&postcount=17"]Websleuths Crime Sleuthing Community - View Single Post - CO CO- Dylan Redwine, 13, Vallecito, 19 November 2012 - #13[/ame]

 

[asyousay]

How many times has it been said that texts worked there, but phone calls often didn't?

So landlines do not exist in CO?

He had 4 hours of twiddling his thumbs and doing sweet nothing so i am sure he could of made 5 mins to ask to borrow a phone at one of the places he stopped by at . Nobody would of said no when he pointed out he had lost his 13 year old son.


This news is not something you break over a text .

 

[Dee10]

IIRC MR texted ER at 5:06, MR notified the police about 6:00. Is that accurate? TIA

 

[Bravo]

How can a human being that cold. I can not believe he cold not even call her to break the news that her son was missing.

That's what worries me from the get go. Amongst other things. IMO

 

[Darcyline]

Abby-Thank you for sharing your experiences.

It makes me sad to see so much judgement directed at parents of missing kids for not acting "correctly" or how people would assume they would react in this situation. God forbid any of us are ever in that situation, but if I was I cannot guarantee I would do everything right or perfect.

 

[Abby Normal Again]

So landlines do not exist in CO?

He had 4 hours of twiddling his thumbs and doing sweet nothing so i am sure he could of made 5 mins to ask to borrow a phone at one of the places he stopped by at . Nobody would of said no when he pointed out he had lost his 13 year old son.


This news is not something you break over a text .

ER herself talks about her and cory texting him, and no mention of calling him. I'm assuming texting was the normal communication method for whatever reason, since it was ER's "go to" as well. Plus since he drove to friends houses and then the Marshall's, we can assume he wasn't at home to use the landline.

 

[kkdj]

So landlines do not exist in CO?

He had 4 hours of twiddling his thumbs and doing sweet nothing so i am sure he could of made 5 mins to ask to borrow a phone at one of the places he stopped by at . Nobody would of said no when he pointed out he had lost his 13 year old son.


This news is not something you break over a text .

I have wondered if MR had been drinking those 4 hours before he went out looking for Dylan. It's always been gnawing at me.
Moo

 

[jennapuppy]

How can a human being that cold. I can not believe he cold not even call her to break the news that her son was missing.

It's quite possible that he texted ER along the lines of:
Have you heard from Dylan? I thought he was at his friend's house but he's not here.

If her reply was in a tone of anger and blame, he may have just shut down because he was upset, too, and didn't want her to yell at him at the moment.
moo

 

[Confusion]

So landlines do not exist in CO?

He had 4 hours of twiddling his thumbs and doing sweet nothing so i am sure he could of made 5 mins to ask to borrow a phone at one of the places he stopped by at . Nobody would of said no when he pointed out he had lost his 13 year old son.

Under the circumstances, I really doubt that her feelings were the first thing on his mind. I know it wouldn't occur to me to drive 30 minutes back home to make a phone call to someone who hated me, and then turn around and drive back to report it to the police. I would also not be likely to ask someone I may or may not know well to borrow their house phone to make a long distance all when I had a cell phone in my hand and could just send a text. That's just me, I'm sure other people would feel differently about it.

 

[Bravo]

How many times has it been said that texts worked there, but phone calls often didn't?

Many. And many times it was stated Dad had a landline. We dont know where Dad was exactly when he sent the text. If at home use the land line. If at one of his friends I'm sure there would be service there. If he was at LE or headed into town why not wait to make a direct call. Or make one from LE? I mean who does that. Not a quiry just a statement. IMO

 

[cluciano63]

I can't think of anything to say. Dylan's case has maxed out my brain. It starts to feel so futile.

 

[Abby Normal Again]

Abby-Thank you for sharing your experiences.

It makes me sad to see so much judgement directed at parents of missing kids for not acting "correctly" or how people would assume they would react in this situation. God forbid any of us are ever in that situation, but if I was I cannot guarantee I would do everything right or perfect.

Thanks, it's hard to put out there because here of all places you really feel the judgment of not staring at your child 24/7.

Let's imagine there were reporters in my scenario... IF I had texted, even my husband, I would have been criticized for wasting time on my phone. Texting like nothing was wrong. Unconcerned. I SHOULD be helping LE and Sally Joe here wouldn't bother with personal phone calls while his/her CHILD IS MISSING!! I need to be talking to LE and giving them all information first, phone later.

But then if I don't answer, that is cruel because other parent has a right to know what is going on with their child- even if I have nothing new to report and knew other parent was also in phone discussion with LE.

Missing parent last with their child CAN'T look right. They just can't. I am pretty sure most of you would have found me unbelievable, because I was a blubbering idiot. I kept repeating things that didn't need repeating. It was weird. I didn't cry, because I had no tears. I just didn't. I went into this other mode where I wasn't a rational and logical person. I don't know, but I will never fault a parent for their behavior as long as they keep open communication and efforts with LE all along the way. JMO.

 

[Bravo]

ER herself talks about her and cory texting him, and no mention of calling him. I'm assuming texting was the normal communication method for whatever reason, since it was ER's "go to" as well. Plus since he drove to friends houses and then the Marshall's, we can assume he wasn't at home to use the landline.

Yes and if i received a text i would naturally assume Ex was at home and couldn't call. Reasonable i would text back. I would think if he was in town looking for Dylan surely there had to be cell service. Or at the very least text back. He did neither.

 

[Darcyline]

ER and MR both seemed like texters (along with the entire family) so that was probably the norm for them. I just don't get attacking them for doing what was the norm for that specific family.

 

[Confusion]

Originally Posted by Salem
On a more serious note - sleuthing this intersection, properties around it (without addresses please) and the siting of the Postal Worker would be very, very helpful.

Do we have a good map of that intersection? Showing what lies in the general area - stores, businesses, creeks, etc. etc.?

Salem

I haven't seen any responses yet, so I hope this isn't a repeat. There is a house almost right at the intersection and a few more very close by, there is a place called ***** ***** Cabins and Homes about 1000 feet away, and the entire area is mainly trees. I'll keep looking to see if I can find any significance.

 

[Darcyline]

Aw Abby-I wish I could virtual hug you I understand and experiences like yours lead me to be more understanding to parents in these cases.