Rebecca Nalepa - suicide or murder? #5

[mentalsolstice]

Or servant. Where are all the servants in these mansions anyway??!!

Funny thing about rich people, they don't always act as you would expect. I once saw our (then) governor's wife at the meat counter in a very mainstream grocery, I had a nice, casual conversation with her as any woman would with another shopper waiting in line. She had no security or anything. I don't live in our state's capitol, however, they are residents of our town, so I assume they were "home" for the weekend.

I've seen the wealthiest man in our state (way long before he had criminal charges against him and went to the pokey), in the grocery store (Publix) several times, with his youngest child by his newest wife in the child seat of the buggy, going up and down aisles like any other guy (and no there was NO mistaking him for someone else). I also saw him in traffic court trying to get his oldest son off of a charge, no limo, no servants in tow. I daresay, this guy had as many resources and money as JS at that time. In fact, a friend of ours son was bff with his oldest son. The rich guy would fly the boys around on his corporate jet to ML baseball games on a dime.

eta: The above person I'm talking about was the 3rd top paying CEO in the US in 1997. I saw him many times through the years...acting like a regular guy, until he proved to be a crook.

 

[scorekeeper]

1. Alpha's controls with a look(s) or nod.

3. Alpha females state that they are divorcing and do it. (Has nothing to do with Max)

BBM

3. DS told JS something like, 'you can't leave me'.....how does that fit?

I could see RN being an alpha female; she was bound and determined to 'make it big' in America...she worked hard and got herself a 'rich' man...could RN and DS fought Tuesday - him saying, I don't think this is gonna' work and you need to leave and her saying, I'm not going anywhere, I didn't have anything to do with Maxie's death, I spent the last 2-3 years kiXXing your butt and I'm gonna get what's due me.........well DS won the fight.....crime of passion

I could be a 'halequin' romance writer....LOL

I could 'write' a storyline for DS too!

Got a vivid imagination!!

 

[Inobu]

BBM

3. DS told JS something like, 'you can't leave me'.....how does that fit?

I could see RN being an alpha female; she was bound and determined to 'make it big' in America...she worked hard and got herself a 'rich' man...could RN and DS fought Tuesday - him saying, I don't think this is gonna' work and you need to leave and her saying, I'm not going anywhere, I didn't have anything to do with Maxie's death, I spent the last 2-3 years kiXXing your butt and I'm gonna get what's due me.........well DS won the fight.....crime of passion

I could be a 'halequin' romance writer....LOL

I could 'write' a storyline for DS too!

Got a vivid imagination!!

Alpha normally say won't instead of can't

One can only speculate as to what was said.........but peoples character traits can be seen by their actions.

 

[Paladine]

A suggestion, all in the best meaning (nothing personal to you MsFacetious) :

Could we keep this thread to stricktly info regarding the case, and if people would like to discuss different dog breed issues etc please start am additional thread on that particular issu?

TF

I get tripped by my 15 pound Beagle... and our kitten all the time. Sometimes I trip over some invisible ghost animal or something...

I had a 75 pound lab/retriever/mountain dog mix that was VERY careful to stay out of everyone's way. I never tripped over her once.

It just depends on the dog's personality, the kid's personality, the set up of the house (maybe the dog wasn't even allowed in the same part as the child?)
So many factors...

RBBM
You may have missed the bolded part of that post, Theforeigner...she was discussing dogs and how the dog may have played a part in Maxies accident...I, for one, found that particular post relevant; it contained personal info/knowledge relating back to the case...I've found, if a post is TOO off topic, we have mods that remove or move those...

 

[Paladine]

Or servant. Where are all the servants in these mansions anyway??!!

IIRC, even O.J. had Kato Kaylin and a limo driver...

 

[Paladine]

RN gave up her whole life, so it seems, to move into Jonahs world...quit her job, summering in Coronado...taking care of his kids...that doesn't seem 'alpha' to me.

Reading those divorce reports give me the feeling that JS is the alpha in the JS/DS relationship; he has all the money, all the power and she expressed fear of him, in that letter (I, among others, have posted the link, previously). She sounds more codependant than 'alpha' to me...but, I could be wrong...

However, over the years, codependency has expanded into a definition which describes a dysfunctional pattern of living and problem solving developed during childhood by family rules.

One of many definitions of codependency is: a set of *maladaptive, *compulsive behaviors learned by family members in order to survive in a family which is experiencing *great emotional pain and stress.
•*maladaptive - inability for a person to develop behaviors which get needs met.
•*compulsive - psychological state where a person acts against their own will or conscious desires in which to behave.
•*sources of great emotional pain and stress - chemical dependency; chronic mental illness; chronic physical illness; physical abuse; sexual abuse; emotional abuse; divorce; hypercritical or non-loving environment.

As adults, codependent people have a greater tendency to get involved in "toxic relationships", in other words with people who are perhaps unreliable, emotionally unavailable, or needy. And the codependent person tries to provide and control everything within the relationship without addressing their own needs or desires; setting themselves up for continued unfulfillment.

http://www.allaboutcounseling.com/codependency.htm

Characteristics of Co-dependent People Are:
■An exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others
■A tendency to confuse love and pity, with the tendency to “love” people they can pity and rescue
■A tendency to do more than their share, all of the time
■A tendency to become hurt when people don’t recognize their efforts
■An unhealthy dependence on relationships. The co-dependent will do anything to hold on to a relationship; to avoid the feeling of abandonment
■An extreme need for approval and recognition
■A sense of guilt when asserting themselves
■A compelling need to control others
■Lack of trust in self and/or others
■Fear of being abandoned or alone
■Difficulty identifying feelings
■Rigidity/difficulty adjusting to change
■Problems with intimacy/boundaries
■Chronic anger
■Lying/dishonesty
■Poor communications
■Difficulty making decisions

http://www.nmha.org/go/codependency



JMO

 

[SunnieRN]

I think there is a difference between alive and on life support. Even if MRI was a last hope measure, I think all involved knew what the outcome would be.

I don't understand the need for an MRI, which doesn't have the ability to diagnose/show or explain brain death. I am sure Max had many MRI's of the brain, prior to an EEG to receive the prognosis of being 'brain dead'. This one stumps me.

Theforeigner can you check something out. It appears that the FPS (frames per second) in the videos will distorts and leaves the alleged rope from the balcony missing.

Can you catch the frame where to rope can be seen (I cannot understand why that happens Note) but the rope drapes in an obscure position which would have the body behind the shrubbery. There is a pipe or branch that looks as if it could be something to stand on.

Inobu

I tried to get a screen shot of the balcony. This is the best I could do from the video and it shows some blurring beyond Rebeccas body.

Thank you pferrin, I knew there was a reason I posted what I posted. LE was unable to contact/find DS for several hours. As I said in my previous point, being a Mom, I would not have left my children with someone I didn't trust and not had a way to be contacted immediately. This leads me to believe GS was comfortable with Maxie being watched by Rebecca. Speaks to the fact that she did a good job of it.[/QUOTE]

BBM

I wanted to comment on this too. I work in CA Family Law, and from my experience and having been divorced myself, I know that if there is a court order for a vistation schedule, a parent cannot just "not take their child" to the non custodial parent's home for the ordered visitation.

It literally takes copius amounts of blatant evidence of negligence or even criminality to prevent that a child should not be at that home or in the care of that person. It also takes a lot of time and money to prove it. Sad but true.

DS was under a court order and without an emergency order, she could not refuse (not without an ex parte order or subsequent serious legal consequences in Family Court) to take MS to his dad's house because of her opinion of RN or her opinion of RN's ability to look after MS. She was obligated by the visitation orders to comply with visitation.

This issue is one of the most frustrating aspects of my job.

I went through a very messy divorce. My ex had generous visits, awarded by the court. I didn't trust him, due to the women he 'dated'. My daughter always knew where I was and from age 10, had a cell phone to reach me if ever the need arose. She also knew not to call me to just 'get her way' if Dad said 'no'.

My point about DS, was the fact that her son was there, she knew Rebecca lived there, yet she was not able to be reached for a few hours after Max's accident. This tells me that she at least felt fairly comfortable with Max being there. That is something I wouldn't have felt comfortable with in my situation.

If this was truly a court ordered, Max was was only there due to 'obligation', situation and Max was my son, I ould be checking in and contact would be easily available for the other party.

 

[snarkymalarkey]

http://abcnews.go.com/US/celina-cas...l-institution/comments?type=story&id=14232912

Interesting rumour/heresay/comment left by somebody here regarding the family left by somebody claiming to live in the vicinity.

If this can't be discussed, mods please delete.

 

[Paladine]

SunnieRn I need your expertise, if I may....

But what if it was a spinal cord injury...how might the MRI timing play in there? Other than rumor...do we KNOW Max was 'brain dead'. We might...I may have missed the link...

See...if he fell from a high distance, maybe he had a spinal cord injry so high it stopped his breathing...now, they may have waited some time to see if swelling around the injury/cord would go down, and then do another MRI? Maybe the coma was induced because it was a spinal cord injury...? I know they do that from personal experience. And maybe they took so long because they knew the choice would be a child on a ventilator forever, a very high injury, bad fracture, possibly? Head injury but not 'brain dead', perhaps? Or taking him off it and letting him go...?

Just a few random thoughts...thought I'd throw them your way....

 

[Inobu]

1. Alpha's controls with a look(s) or nod.

3. Alpha females state that they are divorcing and do it. (Has nothing to do with Max)

Don't confuse the "Alpha status" with the terms and definitions used in Men's Health or Playboy. A true "Alpha male" trait is from the animal kingdom where there is no negotiation.

"Alpha status" is such a odd system Clarice Starling was Hannibal's Alpha by his choice.

I should also stipulate that "Clarice Starling and Hannibal's are movie characters Sampson and Delila are not.

 

[pferrin]

I had a comment, but it was a super bad play on words. <shakes head>

Isn't JS mother deceased?

so sorry ..yes she is. Her name was selma.

 

[Paladine]

Dated July 27, 2011

Investigators with the San Diego Sheriff’s Department, who are probing the suspicious death in Coronado this month, await toxicology results from Zahau’s autopsy. Sgt. Roy Frank of the department’s homicide unit said, “We’re still weeks out” from concluding whether Zahau committed suicide or was murdered.
He said they are also looking into any connection to the death of her boyfriend’s 6-year-old son after an accident in the same home two days earlier.
“I’ve really got an open mind,” Frank said of Zahau’s death. “It’s either going to be suicide or homicide.”
Zahau’s sister, Mary Zahau-Loehner, 33, said Monday she doesn’t believe her sister killed herself.

“I still believe my sister didn’t take her life,” Zahau-Loehner said in an interview.

http://tucsoncitizen.com/usa-today-news/2011/07/27/womans-hanging-probed-in-coronado-calif/

Probably a repeat....but the bolded part was of interest to me...

Notice how the police are making it clear they are keeping an open mind? Making it clear there is no 'rush to judgment'? THAT makes me feel very good. Crossing T's and dotting i's, maybe?

 

[branwynbreeze]

1. Alpha's controls with a look(s) or nod.

3. Alpha females state that they are divorcing and do it. (Has nothing to do with Max)

Don't confuse the "Alpha status" with the terms and definitions used in Men's Health or Playboy. A true "Alpha male" trait is from the animal kingdom where there is no negotiation.

"Alpha status" is such a odd system Clarice Starling was Hannibal's Alpha by his choice.

Ok, got your point, but do we know who actually filed for divorce. They both needed to be out of the toxic relationship based on what little documentation we have that appears to be he said/she said thing, pointing fingers, ect.

I get alpha/animal kingdom thing, I've studied animal behaviour for a long time. Can tell you if you have an Alpha female, look out, think they can be more cutthroat than males.

FWIW/MOO and all that....

ETA, yes, I believe what you are saying about Alphas, look or nod, however, at sometime they have had to take matters into their own hands. One thing about being Alpha is there is usually someone who will test you every now and then.

 

[InTheGarden]

I have not read every message so forgive me if I am covering previous territory. I am leaning toward suicide. I think after the son's tragic accident, there was no going forward with the relationship with the rich bf. It was over and she knew it. Boarding the dog was done because she wanted him taken care of.

How long was the rope? Rebecca could have tied the rope to the balcony and tossed it down. Went downstairs, climbed on the table, put the noose around her neck, wrapped and bound her fee, tied off her hands, lifted her legs, move her bound hands under her bottom, swung her legs over the table and hung herself. Her bent legs happened because her feet were touching the ground.

She was very proud of her body, was not embarrased to show it off. This final act was her way of having the final say. The rich bf would never be able to return and live in "their" home and he will be forever tainted by this sorid event.

 

[4Jacy]

It is interesting that the normal "renters" were not there..no servants..no security cameras..no nothin. Some of my buds have big $$$..they all have service help..security cameras..you go near their homes and alarms go off..plugged right into police station. This is unbelievable.

A little o/t here, but my eldest son, who isn't nearly as rich as JS but has a security system, and when I go over to his house (to be there when my precious g/d gets home from school,) I have to actually open the door, throw my purse on the floor and run to turn off the alarm. I'm fast, but I've never made it before the alarm goes off!! It shots, "THIS IS THE POLICE, WE HAVE BEEN NOTIFIED OF A HOME INVASION, WE WILL SURROUND THIS HOME WITHIN FIVE MINUTES. LEAVE NOW." And it repeats it over and over and it's VERY loud. Also, with the message, in the backround are sirens going off VERY loud. I'm sort of glad my g/d does not need me there anymore. I'm a little old for all this stuff!

 

[pferrin]

A little o/t here, but my eldest son, who isn't nearly as rich as JS but has a security system, and when I go over to his house (to be there when my precious g/d gets home from school,) I have to actually open the door, throw my purse on the floor and run to turn off the alarm. I'm fast, but I've never made it before the alarm goes off!! It shots, "THIS IS THE POLICE, WE HAVE BEEN NOTIFIED OF A HOME INVASION, WE WILL SURROUND THIS HOME WITHIN FIVE MINUTES. LEAVE NOW." And it repeats it over and over and it's VERY loud. Also, with the message, in the backround are sirens going off VERY loud. I'm sort of glad my g/d does not need me there anymore. I'm a little old for all this stuff!

Wish we had a video of it...hehehe :fence::fence:

Welcome in the garden..glad you are here..I disagree with you. I believe it is homicide..we shall choose to agree that we disagree.

 

[oceanblueeyes]

Still no new news on this case?

I sure wish LE would give the media an update on how the case is proceeding.

Still think it was most likely a suicide but sure would like to know what LE has determined.

I still cant make sense of why someone would stage a suicide to look like a murder.

IMO

 

[CuriousAmazon]

I have not read every message so forgive me if I am covering previous territory. I am leaning toward suicide. I think after the son's tragic accident, there was no going forward with the relationship with the rich bf. It was over and she knew it. Boarding the dog was done because she wanted him taken care of.

How long was the rope? Rebecca could have tied the rope to the balcony and tossed it down. Went downstairs, climbed on the table, put the noose around her neck, wrapped and bound her fee, tied off her hands, lifted her legs, move her bound hands under her bottom, swung her legs over the table and hung herself. Her bent legs happened because her feet were touching the ground.

She was very proud of her body, was not embarrased to show it off. This final act was her way of having the final say. The rich bf would never be able to return and live in "their" home and he will be forever tainted by this sorid event.

Being proud of her body does not equate to wanting to commit suicide in the nude.

 

[4Jacy]

Wish we had a video of it...hehehe :fence::fence:

Welcome in the garden..glad you are here..I disagree with you. I believe it is homicide..we shall choose to agree that we disagree.

Whoa, something is wrong pferrin. I absolutely believe it is a homicide as well. And, hehehe, I'm glad no one has a video of that, sometimes I thought I'd have a friggin' heart attack.

 

[CuriousAmazon]

DS, PsyD

Dr. DS, is a graduate of Argosy University where she earned a Doctorate degree in Clinical Psychology. She has specialized training working with children and their families and has worked at the Melmed Center conducting evaluations, providing treatment for children and adolescents, writing curricula, and facilitating social skills groups for children with developmental disabilities.

Dr. S has a particular interest in the relationship between ADHD symptoms and temperament traits and is completing her doctoral dissertation on the topic, while collaborating with a psychologist in the community to develop a temperament questionnaire for use with an adolescent population.

SOURCE: http://www.melmedcenter.com/drshacknai