Pcrum12:
Here is my take on the abuse allegations. I too am a sexual abuse survivor.Apologies in advance for this epic post, get a cushion for your arse, LOL.
When the story first broke, I also thought to myself, "something is seriously off-kilter in that family, I would suspect some sort of sexual abuse going on." There are many, many traits in that family to be sure, clustered together they are very disturbing:
- a domineering female with a weak male relationship dynamic
- a perfectionist mother who is preoccupied with appearances of propriety- her home, her family relationships, so dellusional and living in another stratosphere of reality to the point of not SEEING her daughter's pregnancy at 7 months... and the woman is even a nurse!
- the male seeking to satisfy sexual urges outside the marriage through use of
and pursuing casual relationships and escort services; this implies his intimate relationship with his spouse has degraded completely, he seeks a sexual outlet that makes him feel in control, masculine (as opposed to defeated in his marriage) and powerful
- additional addiction issues within the family (gambling, I would also wonder about
addiction too)
- FCA's thefts: it is quite common for abuse victims to steal from the abuser or those within the family that have failed to protect them. Sometimes it is a conscious decision to "make them pay", sometimes it is very subtle- a way of taking something back. I did this myself as a kid, though unconsciously. I felt entitled to sneak things from my abusers house- little dumb things like a bar of soap or a book, "just because".
-promiscuity. If you are only "good for one thing" as they say, then that's the attention you will seek
- the outrageous lying, a cry for attention, a feeling of what does it matter, nobody sees reality anyways... a million reasons to explain why victims do it
You are right when you say that the only people who will ever truly know what went on are GA & FCA. I waiver back and forth sometimes on the allegations, I too was an exceptional "faker" with many friends, did great in school, my family looked just perfect to outsiders. Inside was another story that I hid from everyone: an eating disorder, severe depression and at my lowest point long after I moved out and did years of therapy, I was suicidal.
That last bit is where I come back to, when I waiver. Because no matter what, the abuse takes it's toll on you and it comes out. The human soul is not equipped to deal with this kind of emotional suffering stuffed down like a cork in a bottle. I did not fully remember all parts of the abuse, and it STILL came out in these powerful, life altering ways. I believe FCA was coached into the abuse excuse, there could be no better plan than to put forth something that could only come down to her word against his, an unspeakable taboo crime that society feels so strongly about, in attempt to justify or explain her behaviour. The seeds were already there- a deeply disturbed and very weird family everyone was already whispering about, the public was already wondering if LA might even be the father. The FBI even did DNA tests, it certainly occurred to them too, to investigate! Baez paid attention to the rumours in the media, saw his golden defense opportunity and just ran with it. It was basically an unprovable allegation that could explain her craziness AND focus to put the blame on somebody else. Two birds, one stone.
The bottom line is that it is so unusual, so out of the ordinary it is almost unheard of to have a victim mother leave her child in the company of her abuser. It really almost never happens. I too loved my abuser- he was my favourite person in my family, I would have done anything for him and sung his praises as a kid- he was the only one who paid attention to me and favoured me. But there is NO WAY I would have ever left a child with him, if I was a mother. Yet there is scores of testimony that FCA did this, many, many times. This one thing is so huge it practically outweighs much of everything else no matter how severely dysfunctional and how many abusive traits the family has. FCA was coached. Dr Danziger's deposition, his professional expertise after interviewing her multiple times, and his ethical agony at putting into the record something he truly did not believe speaks volumes, and IMHO coupled with FCA leaving Caylee with GA, and the fortuitous timing of FCA's "memories" and odd text-booky vernacular of narrative phrases like "I guess I was compartmentalizing" just rings totally false in my guts.
Sorry for such a loooooong post, but I have wanted to get all of the above of my chest for a long time now, and replying to your post made it the right time for me to finally do so!
arty: 
