Found Deceased CO - Suzanne Morphew, 49, did not return from bike ride, Chaffee County, 10 May 2020 #21

[oviedo]

No Jeff Isles if different. You're thinking of Mr. Skinner back in thread #19.

Clearly it’s time for a who’s who, right? Frankly there doesn’t seem to be that many players speaking up IMO

 

[TIGER0822]

I don’t care at all that BM was not at Suzanne’s chemo appointments in Colorado. The girls may have wanted to help Suzanne. Honestly, if I had to pick between my spouse and my girls, it would be my girls every time. Maybe Barry was the guy who picked up dinner on those days, or maybe he was so uncomfortable there that it made Suzanne uncomfortable. Once again, it doesn’t make him a murderer or even a bad person. It’s the other stuff that I question-why is no one speaking on Suzanne’s behalf, when did she go missing, where was Barry, why was it the neighbor who called, why did the family spokesperson fall silent, what’s with the bike.

I am with you on this one. My husband is far more of a hindrance than a help when I go for medical appointments. He gets nervous and says all the wrong things, which puts me on edge. It is more relaxing to go without him.

 

[marylamby]

True. But speaking from experience with my own family, I have rarely seen anyone stay with people in the chemo sessions. I went to a few to drop my dad off. He never wanted me to stay.

Sessions can last hours. Usually the people I saw getting chemo were watching tv, reading, on their phones or sleeping.

I had no idea someone could die during chemo due to the process.

I've had friends, no family (thankfully, and I hope your dad is in remission) who were having chemo therapy. I would go with them or drop in on occasion. In my experience, they were among a group.
When I could get there, I would make it as positive an experience as I could muster. I would engage everyone in the room, usually 4 or 5 people enduring what had to be a terribly frightening and painful time.

I want to add @JnRyan to the conversation.
I'm so sorry that your experience has been so dismal. I am almost always working while checking in here and didn't have the chance to respond to you (he or she).
I always bring light to a friend, and would family, in this situation. There's a good possibility that those who you were getting treatment with didn't have a husband, wife or family. Or, family that could make the trip or couldn't get time off work.
This made me so sad. It's too common when a person has to go through this kind of trauma, whether cancer or other disease, alone.
Another reminder to have compassion, reach out to people we don't even know and make an effort to donate our time where people need us.
I wish you a healthy and happy life. <3

 

[TIGER0822]

Just saw this:
-----------------------------
Friends Say Missing Colo. Mom Suzanne Morphew and Husband Barry Seemed Like ‘Good, Model Family’

Suzanne Morphew has been missing since Mother's Day

By Harriet Sokmensuer
July 23, 2020 11:00 AM


Before Colorado mom Suzanne Morphew disappeared during a bike ride on Mother's Day, everything in her life seemed to be going well.

"That [family structure] where the husband loves being the provider and the wife loves being the homemaker— they fit that to a T," longtime friend Jeff Isles tells PEOPLE in this week's issue.
[...]

"They're close— a good model family," Isles says of Morphew and her husband and their two daughters, Mallory and Macy.
---------------------------
More here:
Friends Say Missing Colo. Mom Suzanne Morphew and Husband Barry Seemed Like ‘Good, Model Family’

I am going to be honest here. SM was a school teacher until she moved to Colorado. Her daughters are in HS and college. It is hard to imagine that SM was happy going from having a career to moving out of state and being a homemaker. Her girls are at the age where she does not need to stay home for them. Adjusting to that loss of routine. the loss of her social circle, and the loss of independence from earning a paycheck is demoralizing.

 

[susiQ]

I am going to be honest here. SM was a school teacher until she moved to Colorado. Her daughters are in HS and college. It is hard to imagine that SM was happy going from having a career to moving out of state and being a homemaker. Her girls are at the age where she does not need to stay home for them. Adjusting to that loss of routine. the loss of her social circle, and the loss of independence from earning a paycheck is demoralizing.

I’m not sure that’s factual. My understanding was she taught until she had children. She was not employed as a teacher up until they moved to CO, iirc. I don’t have a link but perhaps someone else remembers this?
Ed:sp

 

[marylamby]

I’m not sure that’s factual. My understanding was she taught until he had children. She was not employed as a teacher up until they moved to CO, iirc. I don’t have a link but perhaps someone else remembers this?

It was my impression that she taught in Indiana and not CO? Not sure.

 

[Stripehaven]

Apparently the chemo friend thought it was noteworthy BM was only at chemo one time with SM to mention it in the interview. Assessing the behavior of a “husband of 25+ years” is something I have experience with having been married for longer than that and going through a similar circumstances with medical. My husband insisted on being with me which I gladly accepted. That’s what you do if you are in a loving committed relationship after all those years! It’s not “expected”. It’s just the way it is for most long term married couples.
Of course, MOO from my own experience and observations of my own family members as well as friends in similar cases.

Having been through chemo, I can think of a few reasons one might not want their spouse present during infusions. I have my suspicions about BM but I don’t read much into his absence during chemo sessions.

I can too, and all of them belong to an overall list of "not getting along so well." Or "irritates me easily."

There are other reasons. I didn’t need my spouse with me because I didn’t react badly, and I wanted with all my heart to have chemo days feel like regular, normal days as much as possible. I didn’t want to make a big production out of them. I also had a couple of rounds of radiation and I did those all alone because I wanted those days not to be a big deal. It did wonders for my mental health.

 

[rainbowshummingbird]

I am going to be honest here. SM was a school teacher until she moved to Colorado. Her daughters are in HS and college. It is hard to imagine that SM was happy going from having a career to moving out of state and being a homemaker. Her girls are at the age where she does not need to stay home for them. Adjusting to that loss of routine. the loss of her social circle, and the loss of independence from earning a paycheck is demoralizing.

I speculate that the most demoralizing aspect of Suzanne’s too brief life was being married to Barry.

 

[Seattle1]

I am going to be honest here. SM was a school teacher until she moved to Colorado. Her daughters are in HS and college. It is hard to imagine that SM was happy going from having a career to moving out of state and being a homemaker. Her girls are at the age where she does not need to stay home for them. Adjusting to that loss of routine. the loss of her social circle, and the loss of independence from earning a paycheck is demoralizing.

If I recall correctly, I think we determined many threads ago that SM had not been active in the education world in Indiana for many years so she did not give up a full-time teaching career in the move to Colorado.

We do know that she was reportedly doing substitute teaching at a Christian school in Colorado, and last night we learned from a friend interviewed by Fox21 that SM was very active with Young Life leadership.

I do not perceive SM as being an unhappy, bored, homemaker. Quite the opposite-- I think she was a smart, strong-willed woman that may have been contemplating a change in her life. A change that may not have included BM. MOO

YL Mission: Introducing adolescents to Jesus Christ and helping them grow in their faith.

About Young Life

 

[marylamby]

Having been through chemo, I can think of a few reasons one might not want their spouse present during infusions. I have my suspicions about BM but I don’t read much into his absence during chemo sessions.

There are other reasons. I didn’t need my spouse with me because I didn’t react badly, and I wanted with all my heart to have chemo days feel like regular, normal days as much as possible. I didn’t want to make a big production out of them. I also had a couple of rounds of radiation and I did those all alone because I wanted those days not to be a big deal. It did wonders for my mental health.

As it appears, her daughters would attend her sessions so I wouldn't assume she felt the same way, respectfully.
I hope you are now well!!!!
*Sorry, I seem to have typo issues.

 

[TIGER0822]

It was my impression that she taught in Indiana and not CO? Not sure.

the Chaffee County Sheriff's Office said in a release that an item thought to belong to Morphew was found just west of County Road 225 and West U.S. 50 near Maysville. The Sheriff's Office didn't say what the personal item was or where exactly it was found.

post: 16245757, member: 235413"]I’m not sure that’s factual. My understanding was she taught until he had children. She was not employed as a teacher up until they moved to CO, iirc. I don’t have a link but perhaps someone else remembers this?[/QUOTE]

SM was a teacher at Hamilton Heights middle school in Indiana, before moving to Colorado two years ago.

Search for former Indiana teacher in Colorado focuses on area where personal item found

 

[JnRyan]

I've had friends, no family (thankfully, and I hope your dad is in remission) who were having chemo therapy. I would go with them or drop in on occasion. In my experience, they were among a group.
When I could get there, I would make it as positive an experience as I could muster. I would engage everyone in the room, usually 4 or 5 people enduring what had to be a terribly frightening and painful time.

I want to add @JnRyan to the conversation.
I'm so sorry that your experience has been so dismal. I am almost always working while checking in here and didn't have the chance to respond to you (he or she).
I always bring light to a friend, and would family, in this situation. There's a good possibility that those who you were getting treatment with didn't have a husband, wife or family. Or, family that could make the trip or couldn't get time off work.
This made me so sad. It's too common when a person has to go through this kind of trauma, whether cancer or other disease, alone.
Another reminder to have compassion, reach out to people we don't even know and make an effort to donate our time where people need us.
I wish you a healthy and happy life. <3

Not everyone responds the same. My ex had a very serious form of cancer. Still I was there before and after her surgery at the hospital in spite of the fact we were no longer married. However, when it came time for chemo I was not an obvious choice - I got that - but she didn't want our college age son there either, in spite of the fact he took that semester off. She wanted her mother at the first few treatments, but not her father. And her father would be last person anyone would accuse of abuse or lack of empathy. Quite the opposite as he was very empathetic, but handled stress very poorly. After a few treatments it was either a friend or she went by herself, no family, but mostly by herself. I never knew why and this was before my cancer when I started to have an awakening of what was involved in facing cancer. We all just respected her choice.

The cancer experience has been fairly dismal to me. But I like the statement by Lance Armstrong, something to the effect, I used to have bad days and good days, now I mostly have good days and great days. And for me there is no bad day on my bike.

 

[TIGER0822]

I’m not sure that’s factual. My understanding was she taught until he had children. She was not employed as a teacher up until they moved to CO, iirc. I don’t have a link but perhaps someone else remembers this?

SM was a teacher at Hamilton Heights Middle School, before moving to CO two years ago. I am going to speculate that the change in work routines and moving out of state placed a strain on their relationship.
Search for former Indiana teacher in Colorado focuses on area where personal item found

 

[oviedo]

I am going to be honest here. SM was a school teacher until she moved to Colorado. Her daughters are in HS and college. It is hard to imagine that SM was happy going from having a career to moving out of state and being a homemaker. Her girls are at the age where she does not need to stay home for them. Adjusting to that loss of routine. the loss of her social circle, and the loss of independence from earning a paycheck is demoralizing.

Yep I agree except if she was very sick and struggling then I can see her doing all of this
JMO

 

[TxGidget]

Is Jeff BM’s grade school friend? The one who stayed behind from hunting and listened to SM tell him all about her bike rides?

No. That was TS.

 

[marylamby]

Not everyone responds the same. My ex had a very serious form of cancer. Still I was there before and after her surgery at the hospital in spite of the fact we were no longer married. However, when it came time for chemo I was not an obvious choice - I got that - but she didn't want our college age son there either, in spite of the fact he took that semester off. She wanted her mother at the first few treatments, but not her father. And her father would be last person anyone would accuse of abuse or lack of empathy. Quite the opposite as he was very empathetic, but handled stress very poorly. After a few treatments it was either a friend or she went by herself, no family, but mostly by herself. I never knew why and this was before my cancer when I started to have an awakening of what was involved in facing cancer. We all just respected her choice.

And I very much respect both your wife's and your decision.
SM did have her daughters with her, as was reported, and her husband once, as far as we know.
I didn't know her, of course, but she may have been the type of person who enjoyed the company.
You're absolutely right, it's a personal decision.

 

[kkdj]

I'm afraid to say what I've been thinking the last few days.....
Landscaper, big equipment, dig big holes, lye...(too soon)

jmo

One would think if this was premeditated then a large hole could be prepared in advance. I've somewhat leaned towards this. I just can't get stuck on it being premeditated or spur of the moment.
Now, if we find there's another woman in BM's life, then I'll lean towards premeditated. And I am expecting we'll be hearing about that eventually.

 

[BeckyF]

I have been following this case from the beginning and it really touches a nerve with me as well. I think because I am in that age group with 2 children, long term marriage, etc. Anyway, while in general in these cases it is usually the spouse and it very well could be in this case, I don't believe that there has been anywhere near enough information to make an "informed" decision on who caused SM to disappear. We literally know nothing except that a woman disappeared and searches were done. I too am surprised how much hate has gone BM's way with knowing next to nothing about the case. JMO!

Admin approved discussion about the possible involvement of BM early in the discussion. If admin had not approved such discussion, we wouldn’t be doing it. Expressing your opinion about a possible suspect is not Hate. IMO

 

[LietKynes]

Admin approved discussion about the possible involvement of BM early in the discussion. If admin had not approved such discussion, we wouldn’t be doing it. Expressing your opinion about a possible suspect is not Hate. IMO

bbm
Agreed.
It's time to move past this notion.

For reasons many have already discussed.
Not the least being the strange and self-serving "Oh, Suzanne..." video plea !
Imo.

 

[susiQ]

Does anyone have a link to Part 2 of Lauren Scharf’s interview?