My father died the end of June this year. Dad and Mom had wanted the song sung with the lyrics "too old to die young" as it was special to my Dad during his cancer treatments. At the time Dad had cancer, he had 3 kids still in school. The youngest in K. He never thought he would see any of his kids graduate, marry, see what they did with their lives, nor meet a grandchild. He did survive, saw all kids graduate college, three graduate from college, and all but the last three grandkids graduate high school, two graduate college, and knew two more were in college. From a man with his GED, and a laborer his working life, he was so proud of his family!
At any rate, the pastor deemed the song wasn't 'church material' so it couldn't be sung or played at the funeral. On the day of the funeral, I printed out that song, marched up to the pastor before the funeral and demanded time to read it. No one could be believe I was able to without crying. I actually was smiling during the reading. WHY? Because by gosh if my Dad wanted that song at his funeral, he was going to have it! And NO PASTOR or anyone else was going to stop it! I was determined that the few wishes my Dad had were going to be honored, even if trivial to someone else, if there's a will, there was going to be a way. I realize I'm an adult and not a child...though I'll always my Daddy's baby girl. There were tears, and some loud wailing by some people, but I never shed a tear at the funeral. Truthfully, I couldn't cry. I knew if I started, I wouldn't stop....for a month, I didn't cry...but when it hit...oh dear Lord above it hit!
Anyway, I have 3 small nieces/nephews. While at times you could see the sadness of knowing their grandpa was gone, there were many times of them just being kids. Chasing each other. Grabbing a flower from the wreaths, etc., which I thought was fine. They were kids, and as each adult was grieving different, so were the grandkids. My kids actually had to be sedated for the funeral, and they are both adults.
Now I didn't get the silly string out, and go bezerk.....there was some things that I'm sure others viewed as odd. Some things that others questioned why I wasn't crying. Way too many asked why I wasn't crying. I still don't cry because Dad isn't in pain anymore and has a healed body, but I cry when I have a question I want his answer to, and he can't give it to me now. Do I miss him?? YES!!! However, if I had one wish, I wouldn't wish him back to the hell he was living.
I realize that wasn't related to a child..and I think I forgot even why I started typing this post...but...well I've written it now, so going to post it...