Ubee0173
Active Member
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2018
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Whoa, just caught up on about 10 pages and I'm probably not saying anything that hasn't already been said, but something has been bugging me about JH and his Mr. Magoo-like cluelessness wandering through life, and it just hit me what I think that is. So its all JMO and (wild, long-winded) guessing and speculation, but my take on JH is this:
I dont think he does hard drugs, probably smokes pot now and then and thought that was the extent of EGs drug use too. He comes off as weirdly sheltered from reality and like hes viewing everything that's happened as a spectator rather than a participant. Like he's a sibling or child and not the parent or spouse taking an active role in this "shirt*show" that is his life currently. He's always a day late and a buck short of doing the right thing because he cannot act on his own; very very easily led and manipulated . He's used to being told "don't worry, everything is probably fine". And it usually is, except when it isn't and by that point it's too late and Someone Else's problem.
His family seems super nice and helpful, but in ways that are easy for them. A lot of grandparents facing similar circumstances take custody of their grandchildren. His parents probably couldn't because of work obligations and whatever, but I bet they are the kind of people who circle promising jobs and houses to rent in papers and don't mind spotting JH cash when things get hard.
These are really helpful things to do sometimes, but helicopter-parenting a growna** man is enabling all sorts of bad descisions. If he lived his whole life with the descision-making and those little things already taken care of, then he really has no capacity to make critical decisions or check his gut because he has an external Jiminy-Cricket figure to do it for him.
I could be way WAY off base here, I hope I am. Unfortunately my gut on these sort of things stands at 100 percent accuracy so far. I would really welcome being wrong about this.
As for did EG murder Lucas, was JH involved or knowledgeable? I don't have any idea, I think the truth died with EG and Lucas unless she said it on her suicide notes. Even then I think she would just say what she wished the truth was.
That brings me to another point (hopefully the last one on this comment that turned into a dissertation
).
I read some comments about feeling sorry for JH vs. not feeling bad, and I'm square in the middle. I have a TON of empathy for JH, even for EG. I can't begin to comprehend how gut wrenching every moment of life will be for JH forever, I couldn't wish one tenth of that pain on anyone, not even EG. I think she wished more than anything that she fed Lucas chicken nuggets and dressed him specifically in the outfit she said she did and took a nap. But she didn't and I think those "shoulda coulda woulda's" were too much for anyone to bear.
Usually the first "Serious Consequences Bad Descision" someone makes prompts them into weighing the outcomes of future bad descisions and choosing the good descision. For whatever reason all the adults in Lucas's life didn't have that.
And that's why I have a lot of empathy for JH (and EG), but little to no sympathy for either. JH needs to learn about consequences (probably not in prison, but shouldn't have custody of a goldfish, let alone a human child), and I have yet to work up a single tear for EG, no matter how hard I squidge up my eyes.
So there's my book I just wrote here, sorry about that! It's been a busy week or two and I think I just made up for my recent lack of commenting. Hope it made sense and wasn't all rambling nonsense, I feel like I just went to Narnia and back writing all that!
I dont think he does hard drugs, probably smokes pot now and then and thought that was the extent of EGs drug use too. He comes off as weirdly sheltered from reality and like hes viewing everything that's happened as a spectator rather than a participant. Like he's a sibling or child and not the parent or spouse taking an active role in this "shirt*show" that is his life currently. He's always a day late and a buck short of doing the right thing because he cannot act on his own; very very easily led and manipulated . He's used to being told "don't worry, everything is probably fine". And it usually is, except when it isn't and by that point it's too late and Someone Else's problem.
His family seems super nice and helpful, but in ways that are easy for them. A lot of grandparents facing similar circumstances take custody of their grandchildren. His parents probably couldn't because of work obligations and whatever, but I bet they are the kind of people who circle promising jobs and houses to rent in papers and don't mind spotting JH cash when things get hard.
These are really helpful things to do sometimes, but helicopter-parenting a growna** man is enabling all sorts of bad descisions. If he lived his whole life with the descision-making and those little things already taken care of, then he really has no capacity to make critical decisions or check his gut because he has an external Jiminy-Cricket figure to do it for him.
I could be way WAY off base here, I hope I am. Unfortunately my gut on these sort of things stands at 100 percent accuracy so far. I would really welcome being wrong about this.
As for did EG murder Lucas, was JH involved or knowledgeable? I don't have any idea, I think the truth died with EG and Lucas unless she said it on her suicide notes. Even then I think she would just say what she wished the truth was.
That brings me to another point (hopefully the last one on this comment that turned into a dissertation
I read some comments about feeling sorry for JH vs. not feeling bad, and I'm square in the middle. I have a TON of empathy for JH, even for EG. I can't begin to comprehend how gut wrenching every moment of life will be for JH forever, I couldn't wish one tenth of that pain on anyone, not even EG. I think she wished more than anything that she fed Lucas chicken nuggets and dressed him specifically in the outfit she said she did and took a nap. But she didn't and I think those "shoulda coulda woulda's" were too much for anyone to bear.
Usually the first "Serious Consequences Bad Descision" someone makes prompts them into weighing the outcomes of future bad descisions and choosing the good descision. For whatever reason all the adults in Lucas's life didn't have that.
And that's why I have a lot of empathy for JH (and EG), but little to no sympathy for either. JH needs to learn about consequences (probably not in prison, but shouldn't have custody of a goldfish, let alone a human child), and I have yet to work up a single tear for EG, no matter how hard I squidge up my eyes.