MA - Bella Bond, 2, found dead, Deer Island, Boston Harbor, June 2015 - #4

[AmyPond]

This is the thing that so many normal people cannot understand about the addict's mind. RB is 40, which means that she has had a substance abuse probably of waxing and waning proportions for 25 years. From 15 to 40, a time when people develop and mature, RB got high and partied. I am sure she had times over the years where she was sober for a month or two, but essentially she has been unable to process emotion maturely her entire adult life. You could see it clearly in the birthday video. She is getting mad at Bella for not seeing what she did. It's like when you're five and you run to your mom who is doing adult stuff and you go "look mom, LOOK!" RB has the same maturity level as a small child. She honestly believed that a two year old should have immediately recognized everything she did and had a reaction which indicated delight and praise. The rest of us know that babies that age are completely unpredictable in that regard and none of us would be personally hurt if a baby did not react the way we wanted them to.

Today, we are celebrating my son's 2nd birthday. I keep thinking about little Bella on her 2nd birthday. My son doesn't have a clue that it's his birthday (or rather, was a few days ago.) He won't really understand the presents or cake. I don't expect him to get super excited about any of it. And that's perfectly fine. I cannot imagine basically yelling at him to try to get him to appreciate it all. He is so young. Just like Bella. It makes me sad when I think about her 2nd birthday. And even more sad that she didn't make it to her 3rd birthday because she was born to an awful woman. Why can't all children be born to responsible parents who love them?! Ugh. I will be snuggling me son extra tight after his nap today.

 

[wenwe4]

I'm not sure of the exact number but statistics prove the paramour of the mother is most often the perpetrator of abuse toward children. There is a sociological theory that goes back to cave man days of the male not wanting to provide for another male's offspring. (sadly some foster parents are like this as well) Point here is where was bio-dad as he certainly knew of the Mother's history? Where were paternal family members? It appears RB was estranged from her own mother - what about maternal aunt?

It takes a village . .

 

[strawberry]

I don't think this is derailing the topic at all. I could only lurk last night because I was working, but I kept facepalming every time someone here would mention that Bella looked cared for and that RB looked like a loving mother based solely on a few pictures and posts on facebook. I am still a bit flabbergasted. We all need to seriously stop assuming that social media even comes close to telling the whole story. It's ridiculous. The reason I feel that this is on topic is because RB had many facebook friends, and I wonder if just one of them did not believe the Big Lie of Social Media, if he or she might have put two and two together.

Thank you. I agree completely.

 

[Bootsctr]

So am I reading the news right here? No one actually noticed that Bella was gone, but rather RB confessed to the baby's <modsnip> that she was dead and then the <modsnip>'s sister contacted LE? Am I really understanding that the connection between Bella and the Baby Doe was never actually made by any of the adults who knew of Bella? Even though Bella had her third birthday during this time?

I think that is the sad damn truth.... NOBODY noticed this child missing or if they did notice they didn't SAY ANYTHING - knock me over with a damn feather!

 

[strawberry]

Wow! That link! I had to save it. So honest and heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing

Isn't it though? As the mother of a college freshman it's heartbreaking and terrifying.

 

[strawberry]

So am I reading the news right here? No one actually noticed that Bella was gone, but rather RB confessed to the baby's <modsnip> that she was dead and then the <modsnip>'s sister contacted LE? Am I really understanding that the connection between Bella and the Baby Doe was never actually made by any of the adults who knew of Bella? Even though Bella had her third birthday during this time?

This is what's confusing me. I keep reading that the <modsnip> says the <modsnip> "told him everything." When did she do that? After she was hauled in? Or was he the informant? Or did he know and say nothing? I'm so confused.

 

[strawberry]

O/T there is also a ten minute video ESPN did about Maddie Holleran

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=12838977

 

[wenwe4]

Today, we are celebrating my son's 2nd birthday. I keep thinking about little Bella on her 2nd birthday. My son doesn't have a clue that it's his birthday (or rather, was a few days ago.) He won't really understand the presents or cake. I don't expect him to get super exciting about any of it. And that's perfectly fine. I cannot imagine basically yelling at him to try to get him to appreciate it all. He is so young. Just like Bella. It makes me sad when I think about her 2nd birthday. And even more sad that she didn't make it to her 3rd birthday because she was born to an awful woman. Why can't all children be born to responsible parents who love them?! Ugh. I will be snuggling me son extra tight after his nap today.

You have made some very astute observations about the video. You are able to identify exactly what your child would and would not appreciate due to his age/developmental stage - RB wasn't viewing the world through her child's eyes. You would not yell at your child and demand appreciation for what "mommy accomplished".

The constant Bella look here, Bella Mommy is wonderful, Bella do this, think that, praise mommy, do it . . . . made my heart race. This child just wakes from a nap and RB is pulling the toddler into this heightened awareness and frantic state. When Bella doesn't respond immediately and exactly how RB wanted it - then she amps up the emotion even more.

Ugh . . . . breathe.

Who's party was that anyway?

MOO

 

[tlcya]

Please refer to the reported bio dad as bio dad or JA. I am going to remove some other terms being used for him. No matter our personal opinions around the alleged circumstances of Bella's conception, he has not been charged with any crime relating to Bella's death.

Likewise refer to the charged individuals by their names or by their initials.

 

[Fireweed]

I'm not sure of the exact number but statistics prove the paramour of the mother is most often the perpetrator of abuse toward children. There is a sociological theory that goes back to cave man days of the male not wanting to provide for another male's offspring. (sadly some foster parents are like this as well) Point here is where was bio-dad as he certainly knew of the Mother's history? Where were paternal family members? It appears RB was estranged from her own mother - what about maternal aunt?

It takes a village . .

If anyone is interested there is a podcast True Murder on this topic. You would have to look for it but a woman wrote a book about this. Essentially when very young children are murdered, it is often a step-dad or boyfriend not the real father, and it goes back to an instinct to feel resentment towards providing for another man's offspring. Now obvious the boyfriend here was not providing jack squat for Bella, but he likely still had a very childish resentment towards her.

 

[bestill]

RB's sister, not sure if this has been posted.

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/baby-doe-rachelle-bond-bella-bond-father/

 

[matou]

I just don't know about the claim of MM punching her in the stomach. A 2-3 year old's abdomen is not that large and a man's fist is pretty large. If MM was high when he hit her he would have damaged her ribs somehow by missing her actual abdomen. I think Bella was crying and both of them wanted to shut her up. I do remember that it was stated that both were blaming each other for this. RB is likely being more cooperative with LE so has the lesser charge at the moment. That could change with more info. JMO

 

[joypath]

This case is a quagmire of "WHATs": The preliminary information from the OCME indicated that she was a "well nourished child"....boiler plate wording for an autopsy report where dramatic evidence of malnourishment/starvation/neglect is NOT present, estimated age @3-4..... again standard wording when medical/social history is NOT present (basic estimate PROBABLY was from her slight & delicate stature) and then there was that weight statement @ 30lbs....presented from the body weighed @autopsy.

The lack of a published COD was perplexing to the public where in point of fact it no doubt was mystifying to the OCME! I'm imagining the astonishing & conflicting data derived during that post! A case where the invading insects do not match the supposed time of death, where the discernible decomposition does not match with the insect involvement or physical condition, where lividity & rigor do not match any estimated time frame and then the internal examination belies external presentations!

IF and that's a HUGE "IF" her body were contained within a "cold storage" unit be it fridge or freezer, the determination of the time of death would be effected. Decomposition WOULD be DELAYED while within a fridge but it would still occur! Insect activity would be delayed but it would still occur! Purge would definitely occur if the body were merely "stored" vs "packed & stored" (closure of body orifices where body fluids may seep out). Freezing of the body would leave some tell-tale signs on histologic slides (preps made & stained usually hours after the original internal examination) but more significantly in this case, IF the body were kept frozen until discarded on the shoreline, given the atmospheric conditions/environmental conditions present @ Deer Island, the uncontrolled & rapid "defrosting" would effect the internal & external body parts!

 

[ilovepierre]

You're going to spend millions to drug test welfare recipents, when an extremely small amount is going to test positive. Then when they do test positive, and you send them to rehab, how are they going to work and go to rehab at the same time? Who is going to support their family? And are they suppose to just get clean after one visit to rehab? Where are their children going to go when they are in rehab?

BBM.
My dad and brother got clean after just one visit to rehab.
But I guess that's neither here nor there.

I don't know much about rehab centers in the USA, but aren't there some that take in families while the addict is getting help?

 

[MamaNeedsACosmo]

In a way, I feel bad for bio dad. Whether he was involved in her life or not may not have been his choice . Even so, it can't be easy to be in his shoes right now.

 

[Moe]

Why and how did they chose Deer Island? Winthrop is a peninsula, you don't drive through it to get some where. Unless you live there or are visiting one would never know it was there. There are people driving, biking and walking on Deer Island every day, but those folks are mostly Winthrop people. Makes no sense to me.

 

[insatiable]

Why did they dump her on Deer Island? Love to know the answer to this question, wonder how they even knew it was there. People do not go to Winthrop unless they live there or are visiting. Winthrop is a peninsula, there really is nothing there except a few places to eat and the beach in the summer. Not great eats or beaches either, a short ride will provide a much better result. Can't figure it out, Deer Island is pretty obscure.

I live in the area too and I agree it's an odd place for them to end up at. Like you said, no one goes there without a reason to be there like visiting someone they know. Did one of them go in the past to watch the planes maybe?

 

[Moe]

I live in the area too and I agree it's an odd place for them to end up at. Like you said, no one goes there without a reason to be there like visiting someone they know. Did one of them go in the past to watch the planes maybe?

There are better places to watch planes IMO. Who knows, it makes no sense, maybe someone they knew worked there?

 

[Fireweed]

<modsnip>

So had RB not confessed all this to someone then Bella would still be unidentified. Obviously no one noticed that the child was missing, and no one seemed to notice that she had not had a birthday party. This poor child was surrounded by so much dysfunction that she never stood a chance. She has aunts, a bio dad and two grandmothers, yet it was only the confession of her mother that broke open the case.

Some days, I just don't want to live on this planet. Poor little Bella spent her short life completely adrift in a vast ocean of nothing.

 

[Fireweed]

In a way, I feel bad for bio dad. Whether he was involved in her life or not may not have been his choice . Even so, it can't be easy to be in his shoes right now.

The only way it wasn't his choice was if there was a court order preventing him from seeing her. He has not said that is the case, which would be the first thing any person in his position would say if it were true.