I prefer to hold off on judging the parents until we know more. It’s quite possible they tried to get help for their son but had nowhere to go. Friends of the Sandy Hook shooter’s mother say it was no secret she’d tried to get her son assistance from multiple sources but was turned away.
Or perhaps they did get help and the mental heath professional(s) assured them he wasn’t dangerous (like the U of C counselor who discouraged police from placing the Aurora theatre shooter on a hold for mental health evauation just weeks before his crime).
I have friends with a child just 10 that has already threatened lives of family members and w/the help of Google tried to build a bomb. Their parents took them to multiple psychologists but nothing helped. They almost went broke because insurance wouldn’t cover more than 12 visits yet they were denied public resources because they made “too much money”. And these are not rich people!
Their older child told their school counselor they felt their life was in danger at home because of the troubled sibling, but school and DFS never followed up. Imagine being a teenager fearing for your life, summoning up the courage to tell “authorities” and no-one cares. The messages they took away from that were a) their life doesn’t matter. b) speaking up just creates trouble and c) F#%K school!
Now that kids depressed and cutting class. Not good.
But back to the troubled kid. Eventually a psychologist told my friends to take the child to an ER and have them admitted. The hospital transfered the kid to a mental heath facility for observation, and after a week professionals there said the parents needed to take the child home and “get them some therapy”. Which of course they’d already done.
The parents realized if the kid came home one of them would have to move out with the other kids in order to keep them safe. For the first time in an otherwise happy marraige there was talk of divorce.
My friends consulted a family attorney who advised them to not pick up the child. They would be charged with child abandonment but as a ward of the state the child would finally get the help they needed.
They followed the attorney’s advice and DFS (the same DFS that did absolutely NOTHING when the sibling reported they felt unsafe at home) immediately started an abandonment investigation. For the sake of all their children they stuck to their guns, endured public critisism and decided to take their chances in court defending “abandonment” charges. First so their child could finally receive the mental health treatment they so badly needed. And also so they didn’t have to continue to lock up their knives, bleach, scissors, lighters, matches and anything else their 10 year old might try to kill them with.
When they explained their dilema to DFS, instead of providing menta health resouces DFS put their efforts towards finding an extended family member that would take the child in. And granted custody to relatives who’s own children are drug/alcohol addicts and/or convicted criminals. The child is still not getting the help they need, and they’re getting older. Soon if they feel like it they’ll be able to drive to their parent’s house and burn it down. Or run their siblings/schoolmates over in the street. Or both.
This child has no criminal record. They will be able to buy firearms legally in just a few years. (and no philosophy here-IMO stricter gun laws wouldn’t stop this kid from getting one illegaly if necessary). This child has been exhibiting multiple red flags for years and could very well be in the news soon committing some heinous act of violence. These parents are aware enough to recognize it and resisted the urge to stick their heads in the sand. They feel helpless and are worried sick.
I’m sure there are other families in similar situations, also at a loss as to what they can do. Some of their kids will hurt people, thankfully lots more probably won’t. But mental health resources need to be available to counsel those kids who can be helped and identify the ones who can’t.
These shootings aren’t because of Trump supporters or leftist socialists. It sickens me to see politicians, pundits and “news” venues use mass shootings as a tool to further political agendas and fan more hate. It won’t help a bit and IMO just gives the next batch of shooters more reason to get all worked up.
If only politicians, community activists, religious leaders, school officials and society in general would abandon the heady thrill of hate/righteous indignation. Imagine what could be accomplished if that energy were redirected and people worked together to promote tolerance and make sure mental health resources are available to anyone who needs them. But that won’t generate ratings, clicks or win elections. So it’ll never happen.
