Found Deceased VA - Nicole Clardy Mittendorff, 31, Woodbridge, 13 April 2016 - #2

[otto]

VA HOUSE BILL 1635
Amendment to prior bill

Completed Legislative Action
Spectrum: Partisan Bill (Republican 1-0)
Status: Passed on March 16 2015 - 100% progression
Action: 2015-03-16 - Governor: Acts of Assembly Chapter text (CHAP0128)
Text: Latest bill text (Chaptered)

Summary
Defamation; statute of limitations. Provides that if a publisher of defamatory statements publishes anonymously or under a false identity on the Internet, an action may be filed and the statute of limitations shall be tolled until the identity of the publisher is discovered or, by the exercise of due diligence, reasonably should have been discovered.

Needs to be country wide 

This from above Nytimes article 

[/QUOTE]

That's a great step forward.  Identifying the true identity of online harassers is very difficult, and can take months or years.  That more time is provided to identify the true identities of online stalkers and harassers is a great step in the right direction.  The next step is to address the issue of true versus false claims.  Especially with false claims, there needs to be legislation in place to apply punitive measures against the perpetrators such that everyone thinks twice before initiating or perpetrating slanderous remarks.  At this time, even after identifying the true identity of perpetrators of slanderous remarks, very little can be done.

 

[MiniMoo]

Until, or if at all it comes out as to WHY Nicole chose to take her own life, it is only speculation that cyber bullying was the reason or being humiliated on social media.

There could be a number of contributing factors - not just what is written above.

 

[Lilibet]

Until, or if at all it comes out as to WHY Nicole chose to take her own life, it is only speculation that cyber bullying was the reason or being humiliated on social media.

There could be a number of contributing factors - not just what is written above.

Yes that is true. We can't assume that bullying caused her suicide. We really don't know why she made the choice she did. But she was bullied and humiliated on social media and that needs to be stopped and dealt with, whether or not it was the cause of her suicide. JMO

 

[MiniMoo]

Did map it....what a true challenge.

I did read somewhere on social media: 1) 1 mile from the car 2) 330 meters off of White Oak trail.

From the Lower Car Park to Lower Whiteoak Falls is about a mile and is in a SE and SW direction, if driving, or SW direction if walking via the Cedar Run Trail.

From the Upper Car Park to Upper WhiteOak Falls it is about 2 miles (give or take) and if walking starts from a NE direction, then veers West, and then kind of goes South. Could be just the way it was mapped as it was circled in a loop rather than a direct route.

If one mile (social media) and close to a waterfall (as one thread writer wrote somewhere on here I think) then Lower Whiteoak Falls, if it is the one at that given distance, could very well be the closest one to the location she was found in.

 

[Night Shift]

Hazel, your post was entirely too long to quote but I'm not sure what your point was. Bottom line, confusion on the location of the car had no impact on the search.

I could not disagree more with that statement, IF Nicole entered via Skyline Drive. IF she entered via Weakley Hollow Road, I agree with you.

I am ex full time investigative LE and I live very close to White Oak Canyon.

As I noted in my earlier post on page 36 of this thread, the exact location of Nicole's car would have had huge implications for both evidence gathering and possibly help in refining the search.

There are 4 public vehicle entrance stations to Skyline Drive (SD) and SD is appx 105 miles long. Each entrance station has a gate and is manned by a NPS Ranger.

***** IF ****** Nicole entered the Shenandoah Nation Park (SNP) by car then that drastically alters the way evidence could have been gathered and possibly led the search. The possible permutations of where and when Nicole COULD have stopped off at rest stops etc are numerous but full of potential for more evidence.

I am a local and I can offer this (as a possible reason for all the confusion about 'upper' and 'lower' parking lots.

There are only 2 ways that Nicole could have parked for the White Oak Canyon (WOC) - either via SD (and therefore via a Ranger entrance station) or via Weakley Hollow Road.

IF Nicole entered via SD then the parking lot would be the 'upper' lot because SD is a the top of the mountain, the top of the trail.

IF Nicole entered via Weakley Hollow Road then there are 2 little parking lots - one as you enter off of Weakley Hollow Road and then you cross over a creek into another parking lot.

This could be where the confusion is coming from - the media and others might be calling the second parking lot off of Weakley Hollow Road the 'upper' lot because it is uphill of the first parking lot that you come to off of Weakley Hollow Road. They could be calling this first one the 'lower' lot. This would cause confusion because usually the parking lot off of Skyline Drive is called the 'upper' lot and the 2 off of Weakley Hollow Road are called the 'lower' lots.

So we can nail this once and for all - where exactly was Nicole's car found?

Off of Skyline Drive or off Weakley Hollow Road?

 

[otto]

Yes that is true. We can't assume that bullying caused her suicide. We really don't know why she made the choice she did. But she was bullied and humiliated on social media and that needs to be stopped and dealt with, whether or not it was the cause of her suicide. JMO

Online bullying alone would not cause suicide. However, online bullying by persons who appear to be co-workers, but who are unidentifiable, could result in the perception of an hostile work environment. If that online bullying damaged her reputation, and impacted her personal life, I think it would be difficult to deal with the psychological impact.

The least difficult online bullying to deal with, but which is equally damaging, are online comments that are false. Colleagues and friends easily recognize the remarks as false, but others who are simply curious about someone may believe the false comments. I suspect that if the comments about Nicole were true, and reflected a mistake on her part, that would be something that she would have a very difficult time to cope with. Short of changing her name and profession, it seems that she had no way to get out from under the comments.

 

[MiniMoo]

It is approximately1.6 miles to Lower WO waterfall via Cedar Run from the Lower Car Park and half way up the White Oak trail from there it is treacherous terrain, so I feel her car was likely there.

Whereas between the Upper Car park and the start of White Oak trail it is 1.7 miles and the Upper WO waterfall is after 2 miles. The terrain is further to get to from that car park.

So I think the lower one.

Did map it....what a true challenge.

I did read somewhere on social media: 1) 1 mile from the car 2) 330 meters off of White Oak trail.

From the Lower Car Park to Lower Whiteoak Falls is about a mile and is in a SE and SW direction, if driving, or SW direction if walking via the Cedar Run Trail.

From the Upper Car Park to Upper WhiteOak Falls it is about 2 miles (give or take) and if walking starts from a NE direction, then veers West, and then kind of goes South. Could be just the way it was mapped as it was circled in a loop rather than a direct route.

If one mile (social media) and close to a waterfall (as one thread writer wrote somewhere on here I think) then Lower Whiteoak Falls, if it is the one at that given distance, could very well be the closest one to the location she was found in.

I could not disagree more with that statement, IF Nicole entered via Skyline Drive. IF she entered via Weakley Hollow Road, I agree with you.

I am ex full time investigative LE and I live very close to White Oak Canyon.

As I noted in my earlier post on page 36 of this thread, the exact location of Nicole's car would have had huge implications for both evidence gathering and possibly help in refining the search.

There are 4 public vehicle entrance stations to Skyline Drive (SD) and SD is appx 105 miles long. Each entrance station has a gate and is manned by a NPS Ranger.

***** IF ****** Nicole entered the Shenandoah Nation Park (SNP) by car then that drastically alters the way evidence could have been gathered and possibly led the search. The possible permutations of where and when Nicole COULD have stopped off at rest stops etc are numerous but full of potential for more evidence.

I am a local and I can offer this (as a possible reason for all the confusion about 'upper' and 'lower' parking lots.

There are only 2 ways that Nicole could have parked for the White Oak Canyon (WOC) - either via SD (and therefore via a Ranger entrance station) or via Weakley Hollow Road.

IF Nicole entered via SD then the parking lot would be the 'upper' lot because SD is a the top of the mountain, the top of the trail.

IF Nicole entered via Weakley Hollow Road then there are 2 little parking lots - one as you enter off of Weakley Hollow Road and then you cross over a creek into another parking lot.

This could be where the confusion is coming from - the media and others might be calling the second parking lot off of Weakley Hollow Road the 'upper' lot because it is uphill of the first parking lot that you come to off of Weakley Hollow Road. They could be calling this first one the 'lower' lot. This would cause confusion because usually the parking lot off of Skyline Drive is called the 'upper' lot and the 2 off of Weakley Hollow Road are called the 'lower' lots.

So we can nail this once and for all - where exactly was Nicole's car found?

Off of Skyline Drive or off Weakley Hollow Road?

 

[grsz11]

Night Shift, not quoting for length, but I am confident the car was parked at the lower lot not on Skyline Drive. It was reported at the "White Oak Canyon parking lot" near Cedar Falls trail. That's very clearly the one at the south end of the trail per the map, both by name and location referenced.

But at the same time, I don't believe it impacted the search at all. Police knew, to the extent possible, where they were looking. The time it took was based, I believe, on the difficult environment. I don't believe at any point after finding the car, and thus the note, the police explicitly asked for tips. It's almost certain that Nicole was dead before anybody even noticed she was missing. This was never a search to gather clues to determine whereabouts, it was always a recovery.

 

[MIKAYOYO]

Online bullying alone would not cause suicide. However, online bullying by persons who appear to be co-workers, but who are unidentifiable, could result in the perception of an hostile work environment. If that online bullying damaged her reputation, and impacted her personal life, I think it would be difficult to deal with the psychological impact.

The least difficult online bullying to deal with, but which is equally damaging, are online comments that are false. Colleagues and friends easily recognize the remarks as false, but others who are simply curious about someone may believe the false comments. I suspect that if the comments about Nicole were true, and reflected a mistake on her part, that would be something that she would have a very difficult time to cope with. Short of changing her name and profession, it seems that she had no way to get out from under the comments.

Online bullying alone can absolutely cause serious issues. I have seen people online who get 'sleuthed' and have personal information posted or people who their whole existence is online and may get bullied thIs is there only interaction . I don't understand the goings on in some ones head that makes it ok to be so ugly and cruel to someone.

 

[just the facts pls]

Yes, and she worked with all men in a male-dominated field.

It's a forum for all Volunteer Firefighters...It's filled with disgusting, misogynic language....but no, it must be the wives posting. The men are innocent!

I agree. When everyone first heard about this, the first reaction was "boys being boys" and normalizing the bullying as "typical fratboy talk."

Then when the heat gets turned up and they're going to be held accountable, suddenly the perps become catty women. Huh, really?

 

[eileenhawkeye]

I agree. When everyone first heard about this, the first reaction was "boys being boys" and normalizing the bullying as "typical fratboy talk."

Then when the heat gets turned up and they're going to be held accountable, suddenly the perps become catty women. Huh, really?

Can you imagine if there was a forum for all...elementary school teachers...in an area...if people would arguing nooo it's actually the husbands behind the computer screens? Of course not. I am not sure how anyone could read the posts on page 10 (where Nicole is first mentioned) and not think this is all men talking.

 

[otto]

I agree. When everyone first heard about this, the first reaction was "boys being boys" and normalizing the bullying as "typical fratboy talk."

Then when the heat gets turned up and they're going to be held accountable, suddenly the perps become catty women. Huh, really?

Both men and women participate in online bullying. It's a simple truth.

 

[just the facts pls]

Both men and women participate in online bullying. It's a simple truth.

I didn't say only men participated in online bullying. Please stop twisting my words and deflecting from the point I made.

People's responses to Nicole's bullying were vastly different when they realized the perpetrators were going to be held accountable. Everyone went from "boys will be boys" to "women are horrible bullies too!" This reaction doesn't line up with all the excuses people were posting when they assumed the perps were men.

It's sending the message that when men are entitled to be abusive and hateful, and that it's okay to blame women when they are.

In the end, it doesn't matter who anyone thinks the perps are - only a full investigation into the poster's IP tracing back to their computer is going to be able to prove anything.

 

[just the facts pls]

Can you imagine if there was a forum for all...elementary school teachers...in an area...if people would arguing nooo it's actually the husbands behind the computer screens? Of course not. I am not sure how anyone could read the posts on page 10 (where Nicole is first mentioned) and not think this is all men talking.

You're right - if that were a female-dominated forum, nobody would be hatching theories that it's really the husband's fault.

When the bullying came to light, most everyone - not just here but other places - agreed that it was men engaging in locker room talk.

Then, when people realized that the forum was under intense scrutiny from both the public and the media (with the possibility of law enforcement involvement), "boys will be boys" became "let's punish the catty women" in a matter of days.

It makes no sense, unless one believes that it's okay to punish women for what men do.

Then again, we don't know who the perps are at all. Only an IP/computer trace can tell us that

 

[MiniMoo]

The issue is that the "underground" forum was misused and abused with Nicole not being the only female subjected to slander, obscenities, and humiliation. From the start it should have been shut down and nipped in the bud once it was made aware of by "whoever" from the word go. I read somewhere it may have been active for as long as 3 years.

Every workplace should be a safe secure environment for all employers and employees not a place that is full of "kindergarten mentality" and "immature behavior" of so called "adults".

If Nicole was aware of it she should have taken it somewhere higher, but she didn't.

Pointing fingers is not going to help the situation because the damage is done, but what needs to happen is for it to STOP nationwide not just in one small fire department because it is likely happening elsewhere too.

Her legacy will be to bring about a stronger awareness and changes hopefully for the betterment of all in regards to "cyber bullying" etc.

 

[RPsleuth]

The issue is that the "underground" forum was misused and abused with Nicole not being the only female subjected to slander, obscenities, and humiliation. From the start it should have been shut down and nipped in the bud once it was made aware of by "whoever" from the word go. I read somewhere it may have been active for as long as 3 years.

Every workplace should be a safe secure environment for all employers and employees not a place that is full of "kindergarten mentality" and "immature behavior" of so called "adults".

If Nicole was aware of it she should have taken it somewhere higher, but she didn't.

Pointing fingers is not going to help the situation because the damage is done, but what needs to happen is for it to STOP nationwide not just in one small fire department because it is likely happening elsewhere too.

Her legacy will be to bring about a stronger awareness and changes hopefully for the betterment of all in regards to "cyber bullying" etc.

How do you know she wasn't aware and had not taken it higher? I believe she did and why she was transferred to a new location.

 

[MiniMoo]

Like a mayor or MP....whatever is the equivalent in the US.

How do you know she wasn't aware and had not taken it higher? I believe she did and why she was transferred to a new location.

 

[RPsleuth]

Like a mayor or MP....whatever is the equivalent in the US.

I'm sure she did. We will hear more before this is all done with and Nicole is forgotten.

 

[roadrunnermt]

I only agreed that perhaps some of the posters were FF wives. Both are capable. This was only a glimpse into the inside issues and what we saw or heard about online probably IMO was much more intense at the work place in person, another potential reason for change in stations, which most likely didn't improve the situation.

Let's speculate here..what if it was all rumors and not true. How would her husband ever believe her that it wasn't true? It's rumored in public shaming and embarrassing both regardless if truth or lies. This in inside causes the separation. So honestly we aren't privy to all these details. One lie in public could have spiraled her life so out of control she found this her only option. Could you imagine if it was all based on lies?

 

[Poppyflower]

Ugh. Such an ugly situation. Life is hard and challenging enough. Add in any type of bullying and it can be incredibly painful. Unfortunately, I know first hand. I started an online board for locals with the best of intentions- for support and help for new moms and it became a nightmare The scars are everlasting.

Poor Nicole My heart aches for her and her family. I always wish that somehow I could have helped the woman I have followed here on WS. I know it is impossible but I dream of a time where we don't have to suffer alone and no one down plays our pain and hurt. "Just brush it off", "it is just a message board, who cares?", "ignore them". If only it were that easy for all of us. Consider yourself lucky if you're able to do these things when faced with untrue gossip and bullying. For some of us, words will hurt us.

May Nicole rest in peace. I think of her family often. As a mom, the pain of losing a child at any age must feel like torture. Hell on Earth.